Parenting - Parenting Hub

Advice from the experts

HELP! MY KIDS WON’T STOP FIGHTING!

Parents generally see their children as wonderful gifts from the heavens but children don’t always see each other in that same light. They first see their primary caregivers, and the love and attention they get from them, as a limited commodity. They then see their siblings as competition for that love and attention and sometimes feel they have to fight for it. When a new child enters the family, the oldest or older children sometimes feel as if they have been dethroned and now have to share their parents with this new child. This can bring about feelings of animosity and jealousy between children. To deal with this problem effectively, parents can find ways that will allow the older child to become a teacher or leader to the younger child(ren). You can also give the older child special privileges and give them special time with you, such as one-on-one dates to help them feel like they haven’t lost their place in the family. Fighting and other forms of sibling rivalry also occur as a result of these feelings. Avoid racing into every little argument or disagreement. If you do, it will teach your children to create problems just to get you involved. It will also train them that they are NOT accountable for stopping fights and working things out, it teaches them instead that YOU are responsible for doing that. Because you ARE responsible for keeping everyone safe, sometimes the only solution is to just separate them. This is especially true for when toddlers and preschoolers hit one another or begin to fight. It just means they’ve had enough of that other person for a while and they want them out of their space. Avoid using punishments like time out and avoid taking sides. When a conflict breaks out, just separate both of them. It doesn’t matter who started it or who did what, just separate them in different spaces to be apart. And during this moment of behavior management, remain calm and talk very little. You can easily transfer your own negative feelings into the relationship between the children. Sometimes the conflict between the children is actually an imitation of what’s going on with the adults.

May 12, 2023

MY CHILD IS SCARED AND KEEPS GETTING OUT OF HIS BED

I received the following question in an email from a parent: “Our son is three years old and for the past three months he has not been sleeping well. Depending on the night, it can take numerous attempts to get him to go to sleep and then when he does, he wakes up every 3 hours or so and it can take a while for him to go back to sleep. He never had any issues with sleep prior to this. His father and I are married and have a great loving relationship and nothing has changed in our family at all over the past year. What thoughts do you have for us in dealing with his sleep issues?” Here is my reply to this parent: Children go through different phases throughout their childhood and sometimes their behavior doesn’t make sense to us. They could see something scary quickly, hear adults talking about something alarming or a friend at school might tell them something that bothers them. The most important thing for you to do is to remain calm around this issue. When children see their parents acting calm and not appearing anxious, it can actually help them calm down as well. Here are a few things you can do right away. DO SOMETHING AS A FAMILY IN THE HOUR OR TWO BEFORE HIS BEDTIME. I know it can be difficult for working parents, but make time for it anyway. Spend time together reading a book, playing a quiet game, or talking. This loving activity will help him to feel loved and know that his family is OK. IDENTIFY THE PRIMARY ACTIVITIES AT BEDTIME AND SEE THAT THEY HAPPEN. With him, create a visual list of what he needs to do: potty, get PJs on, a story, teeth brushing, and a drink of water. Creating a visual list will help create sameness and routine. Children with more sameness and routine in their lives feel more comforted and calm. I love the product called SCHKIDULES (http://www.schkidules.com) because they allow parents to create visual routines for little and big children. GUIDE HIM BACK SILENTLY EACH TIME HE GETS OUT OF BED. Tell him in advance that starting tonight, after he gets tucked into bed, one parent will guide him back to his bed and they will not be able to speak to him. Role play this. Make believe to tuck him into bed and then when he gets out, calmly and lovingly (without speaking) guide him back to his bed and leave the room immediately. Remember, no talking to the child when he gets out of bed after being officially tucked in. But be sure and smile and lovingly return him to his bed immediately and then leave his room. Do this whether he wakes while you’re up or after you go to sleep. Your job is to create sameness, routine and to draw boundaries and follow through.

May 12, 2023

3 POWERFUL METHODS FOR HANDLING CHALLENGING BEHAVIOUR

When I deliver a live parent lecture, I sometimes ask my audience to raise their hand if their parents used punishment when they misbehaved. Most hands go up, revealing that punishment was a common parenting tool back in the day. Since that time, society has determined that punitive treatment of our children is no longer acceptable. Researchers have also determined that children who are punished are more likely to have low self-esteem and experience depression or even suicidal thoughts as adults. Many of today’s parents also understand how important the experience during the early years of childhood contribute to the success of their children in their adult years. This includes how happy they are, how well they seek out healthy living habits, and how well they are able to select other healthy adults into their lives. So if you want to set your child up for success, here are just a few suggestions on how to handle challenging behaviors with your children. This does not serve as a complete list, but simply a few suggestions to get you started. FIND A FUN WAY TO GET YOUR NEEDS MET. Sometimes a parent is on a mission to accomplish some task and his children are making it difficult by demonstrating uncooperative behavior. Ask yourself, “What fun can I add to this moment that will provide some cooperation. One day I was bound and determined to get the leaves raked up in the yard and my kids did not want to help. Instead of getting angry, yelling and punishing them, I issued a challenge to my three kids: WHOEVER COULD RAKE UP THE LARGES PILE OF LEAVES WOULD GET THROWN INTO IT. The kids immediately ran out into the yard to begin raking. My goal was accomplished GIVE YOUR CHILD A SENSE OF VALUE. A woman shared with me that her son would act out and misbehave whenever she was busy in the kitchen preparing for a big meal for a family gathering. Perhaps the boy felt as if he was competing with the kitchen activities for his mom’s attention. I told her to make a list of all the guests who will be coming to dinner, and have the boy create a drawing on a large 8.5″ x 17″ piece of paper, specifically for each of those individuals. Those drawing will be the placemats placed at each place setting. After the dinner is completed and the dishes are cleared, the little boy gets to explain what each drawing means to the person he drew it for. GIVE YOUR CHILD A CHOICE. Demanding a child to do something immediately doesn’t work in this modern age. It did back when we were young because it was a different time with a different style of parenting. Most of us were raised by autocratic parents who issued demands regularly and we were expected to comply. So instead of issuing commands to your child, give them a choice related to completing the task. Instead of saying, “Go brush your teeth!”, say, “Would you like me to brush your teeth or would you like to do it yourself?”

May 11, 2023

How to assist your child in developing their language of learning

Mom is strolling around the supermarket with a six-month-old infant in the baby seat. Not once does she engage in eye contact, talk to the child or even smile. When the baby becomes restive, a dummy is thrust in his mouth without a word spoken. Contrast this with a dad in a fruit and veg store, with an infant of similar age. At every display he picks up a fruit, lets the baby touch and smell it and talks about the name of it, the colour and how good it tastes. Not hard to know which of these babies will develop a good language as he grows. Babies develop language through constant face to face engagement with a trusted care giver. These days many infants are left in the hands of untrained nannies who are too busy listening to music on their earphones or talking on their cell. The foundations of language are laid in utero and beyond. Two-year old’s who have been deprived of stimulating language are already developmentally behind their peers and the gap grows, requiring expensive therapeutic intervention before formal school entry. Adding to this language gap, we now place the child into a school where the language of learning is different and expect that the new language will be acquired rapidly-because that’s what we pay fees for! What is not understood is that a second language is based on the first. Almost like making a photocopy. If the original is poor, the copy will be too. Home language is important, but make it rich by talking, singing and reading to the baby/toddler. TV and tablets do not teach language, it is a reciprocal process. If someone in the home is fluent in the proposed language of learning, they should be doing all the above in that language, from day one. Babies are pre-programmed to learn as many as 4 languages simultaneously, AS LONG AS EACH LANGUAGE IS SPOKEN BY THE SAME PERSON. Granny can speak Sotho, Mum isiZulu and Dad English, but they must stick to their language until the child is at least 3. Don’t mix languages, this just results in language soup! Besides talking, singing and playing with the child, using a rich vocabulary, you should be reading to the baby from a very early age. Initially use board books with clear pictures that relate directly to the child’s home environment. Talk about the pictures, relate them to real objects if possible and let the baby touch them when you name them. Expand the range of books as the baby grows and by two, join the local library. A weekly visit in search of a new book will become a highlight. You will of course have taught the child how to handle books respectfully! Yes, you can use a tablet, but these are too heavy for young babies to handle and hold. Books in many of our official languages are scares, but you can translate! But what if my child is only speaking one language when he enters school? In this situation, parents will have to work hard to support the school. Here, a tablet can be useful as you can find good apps for simple songs that will help your child acquire the rhythm of the new language. Find books that have a picture with details of familiar rooms at home, animals, toys etc. to help your child learn as many new words as they are capable of, revising them daily. Use full sentences: “Look at the big red car. Let’s count the wheels. Let’s drive your car across the floor Does your car have four wheels? Your car can go fast. Can you make it go slowly?” Young children learn by doing and including plenty of action as you talk will help the learning process. If possible, enrol you child in language enrichment classes, or form groups and engage a good tutor. Find out what theme/inquiry your child is doing at school and link your support to it. Ask the teacher for a list of important vocabulary to practice. In order to cope well in Grade 1, a child needs a cognitive and perceptual vocabulary. Colour/number/shape/size/position in space/sounds in words etc. etc. School curriculums are available on line, which will help you keep pace. Playing with peers is a great help in learning a new language. Children can play without language, and for a couple of months they may just listen but will soon be joining in and may talk more in play than they do in class. If your child has difficulty acquiring the language of learning, talk to a speech and language therapist and get advice. Therapy before the age of six will pay dividends and results will be much faster than if you wait until troubles loom in Grade 1 and negatively affect learning to read. Lastly, make your child’s life as interesting as possible. Visit the zoo, animal parks, farms etc. as often as possible. Be with your child, not in the restaurant taking you ease, and talk, talk, talk. After the visit encourage your child to draw a picture and tell you what he saw. Going to one of our numerous eating venues and handing the child over to the resident nannies is wasting precious language time. Sitting together, talking about the food and having family conversation is making the most of the outing. By Barbara Eaton (Academic Development Co-ordinator for Junior Colleges)

May 10, 2023

My kid is not online

Sure, you might think this, but the reality is, if they’re watching YouTube, playing games on your phone or streaming TV – they are online. Would you rather your child learns how to navigate this world from their peers or through trial and error? Studies have shown that teenage suicide has increased with the growth of cyberbullying. Cybercriminals do not discriminate on age; they attack anyone who is online and unprotected. Unexpected purchases happen from more pop-ups and ads that interrupt games than ever before. We live in a digital world; your child was born to a screen and the loving arms of mom and dad. Screens are a part of our lives, there is no getting away from it. Social Kids was founded out of a concern for what children are being exposed to at a young age with little to no control. The purpose of the course is to equip children with the skills to STOP. Think. Before they click. The content has been developed to be fun, engaging and memorable, along with an amazing team of professionals and many hours of research coupled with 20 years of digital marketing experience, this program was created to protect their own child and others like him. Social Kids is a series of pre-recorded videos to be watched over 5 weeks. There are five 20-minute videos. Each adventure tackles essential topics like how to be SMART online, deal with cyberbullies, spot fake new and having good manners online. Codey Crawler with his BFF Miss Nadie, a professional teacher guides the conversation to show children how they can approach these topics and keep talking to their loved ones. After each adventure, children must complete activities to earn digital badges. Once these adventures have been completed, children will receive a Global Surfer button and a certificate of achievement. Giving you the confidence that your child can face any situation that may find them, either now or later in life. Join Codey Crawler as he helps to guide our children through the digital world they play and learn in. Codey will give children aged 7 to 11 years old the confidence and guidance to surf the net, know their rights and handle uncomfortable situations before their tweens. Register today and save!

May 10, 2023

WHAT IS SENSORY PROCESSING DISORDER?

Adequate awareness, interpretation and use of sensory information is the cornerstone of all learning and behaviour. Some sensory deficits are easy to recognise, such as poor vision or hearing. Other difficulties are less easy to interpret, as they may result from difficulty with processing stimuli through movement, touch, pressure, position and gravity receptors. Some children may have adequate hearing, smell and eyesight but have trouble with using visual, auditory and olfactory information for function. Sensory Integration is the organisation of sensations for use. The brain locates, sorts and orders sensations- somewhat as a traffic officer directs moving cars. This enables interpretation of our surroundings and helps us form adaptive responses that form the foundation for behaviour and learning. When the flow of sensations is disorganised every second of one’s life can be like a rush hour traffic jam! Messages get jumbled and some don’t reach their destination at all. Improving sensory integrative functioning is like inserting traffic lights that order and control streams of traffic, organising the tangle of cars and roads, and helping the child predict what to do when the traffic gets really bad. School environments can be overwhelming to children with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD) due to the enormous quantity and variability of incoming sensations. Common difficulties experienced by children with SPD include delayed development of activities of daily living (such as going to the toilet, putting on shoes), delayed milestones, poor fine motor coordination, poor gross motor coordination, poor posture, restlessness, clumsiness, difficulty socialising, anxiety and low self confidence, poor concentration and attention, poor impulse control, avoidance of play ground, very rough play, very active, very labile, slow work speed, difficulty learning letters and numbers, poor handwriting, difficulty with spatial orientation, difficulty following instructions, distractibility. These are only some of the problems that are most frequently experienced by children with minor or major sensory integrative difficulties. Each child’s symptoms, behaviour and academic ability is different. A closer look at how our senses process information: Vision Organ-Eyes Must be able to detect light and movement Must be able to follow moving objects Must be able to focus on one object Must be able to work together or separately (usually 1 eye dominant Visual processing Transmission of visual input to Occipital lobe in brain where information is interpreted. Manipulate visual concepts (figure ground, visual closure, spatial relations, position in space, form constancy) Integrate visual information with movement (Eye hand coordination, visual motor speed, copying) Filter and ignore non-pertinent, non-threatening information. Hearing Organ- Outer ear, middle ear (ear drum, ossicles), inner ear (Cochlear) Must be able to detect sound Must be able to interpret sound into meaningful information Must be able to accommodate according to noise Auditory processing Transmission of sound to Temporal Lobe and formation of adaptive response Discrimination between loud and soft/high and low/far and near Speech and language reception and expression Filter and ignore non-pertinent, non-threatening information Integration with movement impulses (semi-circular canals in inner ear) Connection with arousal and attention levels Position and movement Organ- muscles & joints Proprioceptive processing Transmission of information about position and movement of our bodies to the brain stem and cerebellum Automatic adjustment of posture and appropriate contraction/relaxation of muscles Enables subconscious awareness of the position of our limbs in space, and therefore provides foundation for any coordinated movement for function. Predicts self-orientation, self-awareness and in many cases interest and satisfaction in tasks. Gravity, Head Movement & Balance Organ- Semi-circular canals and otoliths in inner ear Vestibular processing Transmission of information about vibration and gravity (Otoliths), movement, acceleration and position of the head (Semicircular canals) to the brain stem, cerebellum and cerebrum. Interpretation of exactly where we are in relation to gravity, how fast we are going, and in what direction. Enable subconscious adjustments needed for balance, posture and movement Interaction and integration with all other impulses travelling up and down the spinal cord. Major influence on emotional and social responses, self regulation, arousal and concentration, self esteem, anxiety etc Types of sensory responses High threshold- need more sensory information than others to experience the same sensation. Child may present as lethargic, disinterested, weak, and spaced out (low registration). Child may present as very active, have poor motor planning, touches things, moves/spins/jumps etc., likes heavy blankets/tight clothing, inattentive, restless, rough during play. Both types are associated with poor body concept, difficulty with fine and gross motor skills, poor self-confidence. Low threshold- are more easily stimulated by sensory stimuli, need less input than others to experience same sensations. Child may present as anxious, avoidant, difficulty eating, poor motor planning, dislike of being messy, behaviour deteriorates in noisy environments, dislike of change, difficulty with attention and concentration, tantrums Common categories of SPD Dyspraxia Bilateral Integration and Sequencing Visual Praxis Modulation (Over-responsive/Under-responsive) What to do for kids with SI difficulties: Be patient. Kids with SPD take longer to develop thing even though their cognitive function may be normal. Allow more time for individuals with SPD to complete tasks (including going to the toilet, understanding a new concept etc.,) within appropriate classroom boundaries. Help them deal with frustrations and difficulties experienced as a result of SPD. Children with SPD often appear naughty, aggressive, oppositional and disengaged and are often associated with hyperactivity. These behaviours are the outcome of deregulation on an electro-chemical level in the brain. Use positive reinforcement for desired behaviours, and accommodations to make the environment more user-friendly’ to the SPD child. Provide a space that is quiet, dark and uncluttered for SPD kids to utilise as a regulatory tool. Explain that this is not a time-out space which is associated with bad behaviour, but a way to help our brains organise themselves again. Tents work well or you can use a desk with a blanket over it or a quiet room. Provide ample opportunity for movement. Engage SPD kids in taking messages, moving furniture, handing out books etc. Encourage SPD kids to engage in active play during break times. Seat SPD kids in the least distracting place in the classroom.

May 9, 2023

7 Gifts to Give Your Children Today that Will Help Them Tomorrow

Just because it’s wrapped in pretty paper doesn’t mean it’s valuable. It’s because sometimes the best gifts aren’t appreciated until a child is older. Here are 7 gifts that are worthy of your financial or time investment today because they “pay off” (sometimes literally, sometimes figuratively) in the long run. Responsibility. Have you ever met a child that has no chores? Whose parents do everything for him with little or no appreciation? Or who gets everything she wants AND an expensive gift for her birthday? Teaching your children responsibility is a gift! By coddling a child, you do them a disservice to be prepared for life outside the home. Encourage them to volunteer, help around the house, get a holiday-job, and take responsibility for their actions and their future. Teach them how to do a budget, the importance of paying their bills on time, keep commitments, keep promises made, and be punctual. Responsibility is as much about valuing yourself as it is about valuing others. It builds independence, which is crucial for relationships, tertiary studies, work life, and mental health. A savings account. Consider opening a savings account or purchasing savings bonds for your children. Although savings accounts don’t typically earn a ton of interest, you’ve got time on your side and an opportunity to teach your children the importance and value of saving money. Academic Coaching. Being able to learn independently and successfully applying your knowledge, are just two of a long list of benefits your children will receive from professional academic coaching. Unlike tutoring, which focuses on reteaching academic information, academic coaching focuses on building learning skills, strategies and tactics that enables a child to become an independent learner. Definitely a gift with life-long benefits. A love of reading. Do your children have a library card? Do they have access to paper books or e-books? Head to a used or new bookstore, create a local book exchange with other parents, or find out when the book store is having their next sale. Few loves will take them further in life than a love of reading! Failure. Watching your child fail is hard, sometimes even heart breaking. But it’s a necessary part of life and knowing how to handle failure, a life skill every child should have. How else do they learn from their mistakes? Part of the beauty of failure is that it encourages us to take risks and learn that we can manage the results, no matter what they may be. Memberships. Teaching your children what it means to be a member of a group or club, is a gift in itself. What better way to help them experience the joys, responsibilities and value a membership brings, than to encourage them to become a member of a (formal or informal) group or club? Being part of something bigger than themselves, taking ownership of their role within that group or club, and understanding that others are depending on them, are just a few of the gifts your children will receive. Your time. This is probably the most valuable gift of all. Eat dinner as a family. Read to your children at bedtime (or have them read to you). Go cycling, fishing, hiking or camping together, or just picnic and stargaze from your garden. Teach them to bake, have a family movie night at home, or tell each other silly jokes. Let them know, through your words AND your actions, that they are your greatest gifts!

May 9, 2023

YOGA AND PILATES FOR PREGNANT MOMS

Staying active during your pregnancy is another important way of staying healthy. Not only is exercise good for you physically, but it helps relieve stress, improve sleep and boost your mood. However, being pregnant, especially later on in your pregnancy, means that you’ll need to consider what exercise you’re doing. Contact and high-risk sports are a no-no, but if you are looking for a way to stay fit, prenatal yoga and pilates could be your answer. Why yoga and pilates? Prenatal yoga and pilates can help you strengthen your body, stop excess weight gain and help prepare your body for childbirth. Both are low impact and can be adjusted to suit you and your growing baby. During your pregnancy, you may experience backache, aching legs and abdominal pain. Providing nothing serious is wrong, yoga and pilates can help alleviate pain through strengthening your body. Prenatal yoga and pilates classes are specifically tailored to expecting moms, so should be completely safe unless you are recommended otherwise. Getting ready for birth Not only can these practices help reduce stress and anxiety, but they can also help you during childbirth. The combo of stretching and strengthening your body should mean that your body is more equipped to deal with the stress of labour and birth. Strong core and pelvic will help support your spine and help you during birth. Joining prenatal yoga and pilates classes will help you connect with other expecting moms and, a professional can guide you through which poses are best for you throughout your pregnancy. Not only can yoga help you physically, but the breathing techniques you’ve learnt can help calm and focus you during labour. Is there anything I should be cautious of or avoid? Although good for you, there are still certain yoga and pilates poses and exercises that you should avoid during your pregnancy. If you are new to yoga and pilates, most studios offer prenatal classes for beginners, and, if you are practising already you can probably continue with most of your practice, just let your instructor know you’re expecting – they can help you modify your routine. Things to be cautious of are hot yoga, full inversions (poses on your head), deep twists and exercises that cause you to crunch your abdominal cavity. Your body is in constant flux as your baby develops, meaning some days you’ll feel energised whereas otherwise will leave you feeling drained. Because of this, it’s important that you are aware of how your body is feeling while practising. If you notice anything unusual or painful it’s best to chat with your doctor.

May 8, 2023

What parents need to know about cyberbullying

Cyberbullying is one of the online threats that parents dread the most. It’s covert and insidious, sometimes tricky to put your finger on, and hard to stop. It’s also frighteningly common and widespread, affecting children from around 10 to 18 years. Unchecked, cyberbullying can have serious consequences. Apart from the garden variety pain and distress it can cause, cyberbullying can lead vulnerable children to self-harm, suicidal ideation and suicide attempts. It’s a bona fide worst nightmare for parents, often provoking an intense emotional response. Unlike bullying that your child can walk away from in the schoolyard, an online bully can effortlessly violate the safe space of home to harass and hurt your child 24/7. All types of bullying can evoke a strong sense of shame, as well as anxiety about retribution if a child reveals what is happening to them to adults. Many bullied children and teens suffer in silence and secrecy which only compounds the negative impacts on them. Why your parental reaction to cyberbullying is so important When it comes to cyberbullying, children do think about how their parents might respond; and if they fear their parents may over-react or intervene in a way that worsens the situation, they may choose to rather not speak to their parents about what is happening to them. They may also fear that parents will take away their devices, impose new limits on their internet access or invade their privacy in some way. According to Registered Counsellor, Gurshwen Thöle who is the Counselling Centre Manager at the SACAP Foundation: The Youth Hub, parents need to know that cyberbullying is prevalent across a range of online platforms, and that the perpetrator may well be unknown in person to their child. He says, “Cyberbullying is often anonymous, making it very difficult to address. It happens frequently via instant messaging apps, in game chat rooms, via email and across social media platforms. It’s vital not only to be monitoring your child’s activities online but to also have a functional relationship so that you can quickly identify signs of change in your child’s behaviour. Frequent, open communications about cyberbullying – what it is, how to identify it and what to do if it happens; creates a high-level of awareness in your family and shows your children that you are ready and able to calmly and effectively support and act to stop cyberbullying.” Cyberbullying impacts on mental health Techpreneur and FYI play it safe app Founder, Rachelle Best, who conducts illuminating one-on-one interviews with South African teens for the podcast, Sip the Tea says, “So far, every teen I have chatted to has a story about cyberbullying to share. If it hasn’t happened to them directly, then they still know someone in their immediate circle of friends who has been bullied online. I have spoken to a girl who turned to self-harm due to being bullied, which is heart-breaking. Another surprise may be the prevalence of cyberbullying when it comes to boys. We tend to think of bullying amongst boys being much more about them pushing each other around physically, but cyberbullying amongst boys is common. A number of boys participating in Sip the Tea so far have had stories to tell of being bullied online because of their weight, or their physical appearance.” Gurshwen says, “The most concerning mental health impacts as a result of cyberbullying are depression and anxiety. These states can lead to suicidal ideation, self-harm activities, and plans to commit suicide, which is commonly seen in the news today. The signs that a child might be experiencing cyberbullying could include becoming withdrawn, changes in eating and sleeping patterns, changes in social behaviour, irritability, becoming angry or aggressive, talking about suicide and how meaningless life can be, self-isolation, distancing from activities they once enjoyed. Cyberbullying can cause long-term mental health complications that children can experience well into their adulthood.” What should you do if your child is being bullied online? Firstly, it’s important to stay calm, and respond rationally. Don’t blame your child or point fingers at the time they spend online or playing a game you don’t like. Resist any urge you have to take away devices or impose new limits on their connectivity. None of this is your child’s fault, and they should not feel punished because it has happened to them. Gurshwen says, “Be supportive of your child and acknowledge how this experience has made them feel. Parents should not judge, criticize, or make their child feel guilty for what has happened to them. It’s important to determine whether you need to seek professional help for your child so that they can manage the effects of the cyberbullying. You need to consider ways to protect your child from further cyberbullying and this may include reporting the matter to the police, school, or a cyberbullying helpline. There are various ways to take action, and you should involve your child in finding a solution.” Rachelle of FYI play it safe recommends: Tell the bully to stop – you can support your child to stand up to the bully by calling out their behaviour and insisting that it stops. Block the bully – this can be highly effective when you do not know the bully. Blocking them and reporting them to the platform can get the bully out of your child’s life. However, if the cyberbullying has crossed the line into a cybercrime, you may want to keep the connection so that you can rather report them to the police, ask for a criminal case to be opened against them and hand over the proof you have on your child’s device. Blocking and reporting on most platforms means that the history is deleted. Take it up with the bully’s parents or a supporter at school – if the bully is in your child’s friend or school circles, then you can explore whether opening up conversations can help to remedy the situation. Make sure your child is comfortable with this approach. Disengage, but otherwise do

May 4, 2023

Bathing your newborn

New-born bath times may seem scary to almost all new parents. At Snuggletime we are out to change your perception!

April 28, 2023

Developing the skill of empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. Developing a sense of empathy is an important life skill. Young children are naturally ego–centric and tend to think only of themselves and their immediate needs. There are various benefits of being empathetic such as having a greater sense of security and, developing stronger relationships with peers and teachers. It fosters tolerance of others as well as promotes good mental health and social harmony. An empathetic adult displays greater success in professional and personal endeavours, overall happier, develop strong leadership qualities and experiences lower levels of stress.

April 28, 2023

Teach your Teenager to work wisely with money

Children and teenagers have to be shown and taught how to deal with money. We are advised that, ‘The love of money is the root of all evil’. The source of this wisdom is the Book of Timothy in the Bible. This well-known adage is often misquoted as, ‘Money is the root of all
evil’, which does not mean the same at all. It is greed and corruption and the misuse of money which can cause trouble for us, not the
cold, hard cash or credit cards in your wallet

April 28, 2023

Are we doing too much for our children?

As parents, many of us do things for our kids that we were able and expected to do for ourselves as kids. Our parents didn’t feel the need to negotiate with our sports coach, solve our every problem, or entertain us in our free time. A big difference from today, when all too often we are over-involved in many areas of our children’s lives. Sounds funny, I know. How can a parent be too involved or do too much for their child? Isn’t that just being a good parent? But when we don’t expect our kids to take responsibility for chores or their behaviour, and we attempt to smooth away all the bumps and bruises that are a natural part of childhood, we aren’t doing our kids a favour. Instead, we’re bringing them up to avoid taking personal responsibility and to expect that others will take care of things for them – even when they are really able to take care of it themselves. We’re teaching our kids that life is full of unmanageable problems, when what we actually want them to learn are the basic skills to manage those problems. Stepping back and taking on the role of coach and teacher instead of “do-er” and “fixer” was one of the hardest things I had to do as a parent. But it is also one of the best things you can do to help your child build their social and problem-solving skills and at the same time learn responsibility.

April 28, 2023

Top Tips for new moms getting the nutrients they need when breastfeeding

When your baby relies on you and your precious breast milk to provide the essential nutrients they need to help them grow and give them the best start in life, it is crucial you are eating healthily. Finding the time and the energy to eat properly when you have a new baby to care for can be challenging, so here are a few helpful tips:

April 28, 2023

What To Do When A Child Goes Missing

Try not to panic and DO NOT WAIT 24 hours to report your missing child. Get a responsible person to stay at your house while you’re at the police station or searching for your child. This person can take messages if someone calls about the child’s disappearance or if the child returns home. Go to your nearest police station and take a recent photograph of your child with you. Make sure that the photograph is of good quality so that your child will be easily identifiable.Give a good description of what your child was wearing, their last whereabouts and any information that may help the police. Complete a SAPS 55 (A) form which safeguards the police against false or hoax reports. This form also gives the Police permission to distribute the photos and information of the missing child. Make sure the police give you a reference number and a contact name and number of the SAPS officer(s) assigned to the investigation. Click on our Report Now button, and complete the form: https://missingchildren.org.za/report/. Remember that if your child returns home, you should go to the Police station to report that your child is safe and let MSCA know that your child has returned home safely. Top Tip: Do Not Wait 24 Hours Parents or guardians MUST not wait for 24 hours to report a child that has gone missing. This is a myth, and if a child is reported missing immediately, the chances of recovering the child in the first ‘golden 2 – 3 hours’ is far more successful. MCSA Identity Kit Missing Children South Africa has developed an Interim ID Kit, and this is a great way to document all the important information about your child. Download it here https://missingchildren.org.za/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/Interim-Kit-2020-1.pdf. Print and complete one for each of your children and keep it in your bag, just in case you might need it. Losing a child is one of the most traumatic experiences and this will relieve a lot of stress, having the information with you, when you need it most. Our website www.missingchildren.org.za acts as an emergency report facility, as well as being MCSA’s platform for informational and educational material with regards to Child Safety. The service MCSA offers to the community and government is invaluable and as you can imagine we certainly have our work cut out for us. We provide our services free of charge to anyone who needs us. Sadly we don’t necessarily enjoy the same privilege for our needs and our financial requirements quite often outweigh our resources! We rely solely on the goodwill of individuals and corporations for financial support – funding remains MCSA’s biggest challenge. You can assist us now by clicking here https://missingchildren.org.za/donate/ and donating – this will be deeply appreciated and is much needed. Education plays an incredibly vital role in the life of Missing Children South Africa, and all funds received is utilised to further MCSA’s educational program; ‘Tips for Children’ and ‘Tips for Parents’ which promotes Child Safety. The education is targeted to all the vulnerable and orphaned children, and also children with disabilities. The education is also shared with parents, guardians and the families who take care of these children. The education focuses on not only the dangers, but also the solutions with regards to what to do to keep children safe, and especially what not do.

April 26, 2023

Understanding your toddler’s temperament

Can we ever fully understand toddlers? I’m afraid not. But trying to understand your child’s temperament (their unique nature and character) will certainly help you to get to know them throughout their toddler phase.

April 26, 2023

Why vitamin D matters for babies, tots and mothers

When asked what the most important vitamin to promote a healthy immune system is, most people will automatically say vitamin C. Praised for decades for its ability to help fight colds and flus, develop and repair tissue, heal wounds and maintain healthy bones, cartilage and teeth, this powerhouse vitamin takes centre stage in every supplement aisle. If you were told you could take only one supplement for the rest of your life, we can almost guarantee that the majority of people would choose vitamin C. For decades, we have relied on it almost solely to improve our health.

April 25, 2023

ARE ESSENTIAL OILS SAFE FOR CHILDREN?

South Africa has joined the new oil boom and you can now readily find doTERRA and Young Living essential oils on our shores. With all the apparent “positive” effects these oils are having and especially since I am seeing so many parents use these oils on their children, I decided to do a little research, because for me, it’s all in the evidence.

April 21, 2023

Investment basics for children

Talking about budgets is often the starting point in the financial education of kids. While budgeting can help you live within your means and stay solvent, only investing will help you become wealthy and financially independent one day. However, there is often a lot of jargon in the investment world, which is perhaps why we often don’t explain it to kids. Here are five investment basics for kids in plain language anyone can understand from the CEO of an investment company. Saving is for the short term, investing is for the long run Setting money aside monthly for unexpected expenses is a good start. As the last few months have taught us, an emergency fund is essential. Because you might need this money at any time, you don’t want to invest it in anything where the value will fluctuate too much, or where you can’t access it at short notice. This money should be kept in an easily accessible form, like a savings account or a money market fund. However, if you want to save for bigger long-term goals you will need to give your investment enough time to grow and invest in something that offers a higher return on investment than cash or money markets. Time is the secret ingredient when it comes to growing wealth Very few people become wealthy overnight. Listening to the stories of great business people, it soon becomes clear that a lot of hard work preceded their ‘overnight success’. The same applies to money. Every year’s gains add to that of the years that came before, and these gains add up. The key is not to give up or touch this money too soon. If you planned to invest your money for a certain time, it is usually best to stick to your plan unless something material has changed. Invest in the right things for the right reason This is the part that seems to trip many people up. We often get asked “what is the best investment?” However, there is no such thing (with a few caveats I’ll get to last)! The right investment is one that will do what you need it to do. If you need an emergency fund, then the right investment is one you can access quickly and where what you get out is more or less what you put in. But if you are investing for retirement, then accessing it now is not important. You also don’t want to just get back what you put in, because in thirty years’ time that money won’t buy you very much because things get more expensive over time due to inflation. You want your money to grow faster than inflation, so you can buy the same things (and maybe even more) in 30 years’ time. Asset class ABCs Asset classes are a way of sorting the things (instruments) we can invest in into groups by how they tend to behave. There are four basic types: cash, bonds, property, and equities. Less risky assets give you lower returns while more risky ones provide higher returns in the long run. Risk can sometimes mean losing money, but mostly it means an asset does not behave as expected. The least risky assets are cash and money markets, but they typically offer the lowest returns over the long run. Bond investments pay an agreed interest rate over an agreed period, and this is typically a higher rate than you can get from cash investments. Property investments are more risky than cash and bonds, but tend to offer higher returns. In addition to residential property, you can invest in things like shopping centres or office complexes, where people pay rent. When it comes to building wealth in the long-term, however, shares – also known as equities – are the place to be. These are like owning a part of a company. However, share prices move up and down all the time, sometimes by up to 30%, like we have seen recently. Because of this, it is often better to hold a balanced or multi-asset portfolio. This just means you combine all the asset classes to get the best of all worlds – more return for less risk. Lastly, choose whom you trust with care While each type of investment has its place, not all investment services providers are a safe bet. Some may be outright dishonest, others may be incompetent. Be careful of anyone promising fantastic returns in a short space of time (as you’ve just learnt, making money takes time!). Always check that the person you entrust your money to can be trusted, and invest with a company you know, and that is covered by solid regulations. By Anet Ahern, CEO at PSG Asset Management

April 21, 2023

Why consistency and routine are important for toddlers

The toddler phase is so amazing as they develop into little humans with cute mannerisms and sayings. However, it is also the most difficult phase as they are also developing emotionally where strong wills and protesting happen in a rather violent way! We as parents have the responsibility to guide and teach these toddlers what is expected in life as they honestly don’t know what is best for themselves. For example, my toddler can distinguish between whether he wants to nap or not. His feelings toward the issue are not helpful because he does not YET have all the information to make an informative and emotionally intelligent choice about his life. The toddler does not take into account that he woke up very early, that he is over-tired and over-stimulated and that the sweets he ate earlier also add to a disruption in his sleep cycle. My toddler will obviously not think it is a good idea to sleep, but we as parents know that his little body can only go so far, before it needs to recharge and relax via a nap! So here are what the experts say about why routine and consistency is so important for our little ones: Young children do not yet fully understand the concept of time, so they do not order their lives by hours and minutes, but rather by the events that happen. When events happen in the same order every day, children have a better understanding of their world, and therefore feel more secure. A regular schedule gives children a way to order and organize their lives. When young children know what to expect, they become more confident in both themselves and the world around them. They know they will not be confronted with unfamiliar tasks for which they are unprepared (www.education.com/magazine). The Northwestern University Counselling Department has explained that parents should attempt to attain the “4 C’s of Parenting”. This includes Choices, Consequences, Consistency and Care. If you make the right choices, and explain and follow through with consequences consistently and with care, you will be helping yourself and your child flourish in a known environment, where the boundaries and expectations are clear. Moises Roman from UCLA Early Care & Education Department says the following about consistent care: Schedules and routines are important for children because they need to know what’s coming next. If the schedule is consistent, children learn the pattern. Once a pattern is set children can infer, for instance, that lunch comes after music time. This way, there aren’t too many unknowns. Schedules help build trust between childcare providers and children. Young children begin to understand that adults will take care of their needs on a regular basis. When children have too many unknowns, anxiety builds up and they start showing emotional reactions to the inconsistency. For instance, they may cry or become irritable and take it out on other people. If they don’t have regular routines it starts showing in different ways. Let’s say that a child is used to having lunch at 11:30 am every day. And for some reason, lunch is late and the child doesn’t get to eat until 1:00 pm. You may see the child crying and being irritable. You can try to talk to them, but they will no longer enjoy the things that they normally do. Breaking a schedule throws a child completely off. Some flexibility is important though. For example, if your schedule says your music time goes for 30 minutes and you’re done in only 10 minutes because the children are telling you they are finished, then move on to the next activity on your schedule. Flexibility in that respect is fine. This applies to other things like play time, story time and quiet time. So if kids need more sleep during nap time, allow them to rest. Consistency and routine creates TRUST, SAFETY and EMOTIONAL STABILITY for your toddler! By Michelle Janse van Rensburg – Good Night Sleep Consultant

April 21, 2023

Choosing the right humidifier for your child

Now that winter is coming, it’s a good idea to invest in a good humidifier if you don’t already have one. In this post I highlight the benefits of these machines and discuss the differences between cool and warm mist humidifiers. What are the benefits of a humidifier? During the cold winter months the air becomes dry. This causes our skin and airways to dry out as we lose more water from our skins through osmosis. Humidifiers work by adding moisture back into the air to increase the humidity. This can help relieve dry skin and cracked lips, dry nasal passages and associated nose bleeds, dry and sore throats as well as snoring. Humidifiers also help alleviate congestion by loosening up mucus secretions. Humidifiers also help prevent the spread of airborne viruses, which is especially helpful in winter. A higher humidity prevents the movement of germs because when they combine with water droplets they become heavier causing them to fall to the ground. Humidifiers are not only beneficial in winter but also in summer as air conditioners can also make the air dry. Use during spring and autumn can also help alleviate the symptoms of allergies because moisture will soothe nasal passages as well as dry itchy eyes. Warm versus cool mist? Warm mist humidifiers are evaporative. They heat up the water to create warm steam or mist, which can warm up a room. However by the time the vapour reaches the airways it will be room temperature. Since these humidifiers warm up the water, they have the advantage of helping to destroy any bacteria present in the water so that the water vapour being dispersed into the air is clean. Regardless of this, warm humidifiers are not recommended for use in children’s bedrooms or in areas where they can get a hold of them because children can burn themselves. There are two different types of cool humidifiers – ultrasonic and evaporative ones. Both types are often advertised as “cool mist”. The evaporative ones evaporate the water without heating it up whereas the ultrasonic ones disperse water droplets instead of water vapour. The problem with this is that water droplets are larger and able to carry other substances present in the water with them whereas water vapour cannot. However, ultrasonic humidifiers are quieter and also more energy efficient. What are the risks of a humidifier? There are some people who don’t advocate the use of a humidifier because of the negative effects it can have on your health but these effects are mostly due to improper cleaning of your device. Whenever water is allowed to sit, there is a chance of bacteria and mold growing. I spoke briefly about ultrasonic humidifiers and how they not only propel water into the air but everything else that is in the water. This means that whatever has grown in the water will be dispersed into the air, which can cause health problems. You will also get a buildup of minerals from the water if your machine is not cleaned properly and similarly these will also be dispersed into the air and fall as white dust. This dust is not necessarily harmful but it can irritate the airways of children and those with respiratory problems. If this is a risk it’s better to use distilled water in the tank, which is mineral free. It is also possible to put too much moisture into the air, which can lead to the growth of mould inside your home. If you notice water drops on the windows or windowsills you will have to use the humidifier less often. You could invest in a hygrometer to monitor the humidity, which should never be more than 50% inside your home. What about an air purifier? An air purifier is not the same thing as a humidifier. Purifiers clear the air of allergens and dust and can also reduce mold, which can be really helpful for asthma sufferers. It is possible to use both a humidifier and an air purifier in the same room because they both have a different purpose. Which humidifier you choose is really a matter of personal preference (if there is no danger of a child burning him or herself). The most important thing is that you keep your humidifier VERY clean. This is especially important with the ultrasonic humidifiers. Regular and thorough cleaning will prevent mineral buildup, growth of bacteria and mould and also keep your machine working optimally. I also wouldn’t rely on various claims made by manufacturers about the product being able to prevent bacterial buildup. The bottom line is that you need to clean your humidifier every day.

April 19, 2023

Child drownings are not seasonal and are almost always preventable

Child drownings happen year-round and PowerPlastics Pool Covers is on a drive to remind parents that these drownings are entirely preventable with multiple layers of safety applied to the pool. The PowerPlastics Solid Safety Cover and adult supervision at all times should be included in these layers of safety at all times. The PowerPlastics Solid Safety Cover offers parental peace of mind as it completely seals off the entire pool. The PVC cover is drawn over strong aluminium batons that rest on the coping, and a tamperproof ratchet fastening system makes it impossible for a small child to access the water. Small drainage holes prevent rain or sprinkler water from collecting on the cover as just a few millimetres of water can be fatal to a curious child. The cover withstands up to 220kg and is easily deployed by two people, or it can be semi-automated for single person usage. The PowerPlastics Solid Safety Cover is available in a range of colours, allowing it to blend into the outdoor area. Importantly, the cover complies with the recommended guidelines (SANS 10134) for pool safety, set by the SABS who oversees pool safety compliance in SA. Thermal pool covers or ‘bubble’ covers that lie directly on the water should never be considered as child safety pool covers as they do not bear weight. Aside from covering the pool, every adult in the home needs to know what a drowning in progress actually looks like as TV has created many misconceptions around this. There is no noise or splashing nor calls for help. Drowning is quick and silent. Even if one doesn’t have children, it is still necessary to consider safety for visitors. Families living in residential complexes with a communal pool should insist that their body corporate install a solid safety pool cover. PowerPlastics Pool Covers has also created a Safety Monitor system. Based on the principle that adult supervision is key to avoiding drownings, it allows children to quickly identify the adult in charge should there be a safety issue among the children in the pool. When there’s a larger number of children in the pool, e.g at pool parties, it is advisable to have two or more supervisors each wearing a tag. A busy pool is high risk. You can download it here and print at home. Laminate it if possible (to prevent water damage) and then add a lanyard or tie it on a loop of string and wear around the neck. The bottom line is that children need to be supervised around pools, and as long as the pool is covered and other layers of safety are in place, the likelihood of a tragedy occurring in your pool is greatly reduced. Practical tips for pool safety Don’t let your pool’s water levels drop. Keeping the pool topped up allows for small arms to easily grab the edge if needed. For every two children in the pool, have one adult supervising and use the Saefty Monitor tag system. The more children, the more supervisors needed. Be aware that children’s pool parties are high-risk events. Turn off fountains and water features. Not only do they waste water and power, they can cause ripples and splashing, making it harder to see when a child has encountered difficulty in the pool or has sunk to the bottom. Ensure that every adult in the home knows CPR, including domestic workers. Never hire a baby sitter or au pair who can’t swim. Don’t let anyone who has been drinking or on sedative medication supervise children in a pool. Don’t leave toys in or near an open pool as children will be tempted to retrieve them. Teach your child to swim fully clothed and with shoes on. If your child develops a fear of water, don’t ignore this – a child who panics is at greater risk of drowning. Never allow swimming after dark. Discourage your dogs from swimming. Children and pets in a pool are not a good mix. Never leave the pool without securing it with your PowerPlastics Solid Safety Cover. Never design / build a pool that cannot be secured for child safety. The Vektor Rollup Station brings semi-automation to the PowerPlastics Solid Safety Cover. Learn more.

April 18, 2023

Self-care, because parents need looking after too!

Becoming a parent is exciting but can also be overwhelming at times. The changes to mum, relationships and of course sleep deprivation, can all lead to emotional and mental health strains. And all of this is completely understandable. Having a baby is the biggest change that can happen in one’s life. Not only is your entire life now dedicated to caring for a new life, but all the things you may have taken for granted (such as popping out for a spontaneous dinner or having a lie-in on the weekend), have now taken a back seat. On top of that, many mums find breastfeeding challenging, they may have a baby with colic (who will no doubt need extra attention), and there is always an endless supply of washing to be done! As if that wasn’t enough, there are the physical challenges to overcome. Mum’s body will change significantly during and post-pregnancy. Having a C-section will mean a considerable amount of recovery time, and for a while, mum may be limited in her capabilities. A natural birth may mean mum leaves hospital sooner and doesn’t need to recover from surgery, but it’s not without its challenges, and it will take several weeks for her to heal. During this time she’ll have to contend with a newborn, while not feeling her best. Then there are the long-term challenges. One of the biggest challenges parents face, is having enough time, and maintaining a balanced lifestyle. Babies and children are a lot of work, and finding enough time to care for them while holding down a job, maintaining a home and keeping up hobbies can be very difficult. Some parents give up their hobbies or interests once they have children because they simply cannot find the time. While putting your own needs aside to care for your baby is admirable, giving up on your interests, hobbies or social life may lead to resentment in the long-term. This is also true for your relationship. It’s no secret that new (and in many cases, not new!) parents are exhausted. In the beginning, getting through each day is an achievement. This can put a strain on relationships, particularly the relationship between mum and dad. We all know that relationships are hard work and that they require time and effort. Once baby arrives, it’s likely that there won’t be a lot of time and effort put into your relationship. While this is foreseeable in the first few weeks, it is absolutely essential that mum and dad find the time to focus on their relationship thereafter. After all, now is the time they will need each other more than ever! Take some time out for self-care and recognise that asking for help is not a sign of failure; protecting you and your baby is part of your journey: Accept help – as soon as baby arrives you will likely be flooded with well-wishes and offers of help from close friends and family. Take them up on their offers. Your own mum, for example, may offer to help with a couple of loads of washing per week, or a friend might offer to do a shop for you at the local grocery store. As parents we want to do it all, but there is absolutely no shame in accepting some help from time to time. After all, your loved ones would not be offering if they weren’t willing to help! And those little things, be it washing, or shopping, or cooking a meal, add up. You will put the extra time to great use. Bonding with baby – making time amongst the chaos to share intimate moments with baby will further strengthen your bond as a parent. You may be thinking, “I spend all day with my baby, surely our bond is strong enough?” While this may be true, there is a difference between spending time together while going through the motions, and spending quality time together. Cuddle your baby, put your phone away, watch baby sleep, or play together to share memorable times. While much of the first couple of months may be about surviving, it’s important to enjoy the journey and to savour each and every moment. After all, in the blink of an eye, he or she will be off to school! Sleep – it is important that you rest when your baby sleeps. While baby’s nap time may seem like the perfect opportunity to get through your never-ending to-do list, you can’t run on empty. Napping when you can will help you recharge your batteries too. Ask your partner to help – there is a common misconception that the responsibility of baby lies entirely on mum, especially while she is on maternity leave. While it’s true that your partner may likely only have a few days paternity leave and return to work soon after baby’s birth, that doesn’t mean they don’t need to take on their share of the responsibilities. In fact, many dads want to help more, but sometimes lack the confidence, or feel like they are getting in the way of mum and baby’s established routine. Encourage dad to get involved in bath time, feeding time (unless you’re exclusively breastfeeding, that is) and play time. Sometimes he may get home from work too late, but that doesn’t mean he can’t assist with other things. Ask him to pick up dinner on the way home if you’re too tired to cook, ask him to run you a bath or to make you a cup of tea after dinner. Sometimes the smallest acts of help make a major difference to your day. Enjoy life’s small luxuries – after baby is born, it will take some time before you can indulge in luxuries like getting a massage or going out for a meal. Treat yourself at home by indulging in a few small luxuries that’ll instantly lift your spirits. Light some scented candles to add a lovely fragrance to the room, add a bath bomb, oil or bubble bath to your

April 17, 2023

Introducing your little ones to fruit

Introducing your little one to trickier tastes, particularly fruit, early on in the weaning journey will help them accept them more readily. Infants usually start with pureed or mashed foods such as nutritious, organic and tasty baby and toddler pouches, a convenient way for babies to explore food on the go – just simple combinations of fruits and grains for a fun taste adventure! As your little one gets older, you can have fun with all sorts of fruits and finger foods, discovering new tastes and textures along the way! Taste As your little one grows, their sense of adventure does too, and from around 6 to 12 months they’ll be open to trying new tastes. This is often called the weaning window. Research shows that babies who are offered a wide variety of tastes and textures at this age are more likely to eat a range of foods later in childhood. Don’t worry though it may take 10-15 tries for your baby to get used to new tastes, so keep trying! There will be days when they eat more, some when they eat less, and then days when they reject everything – this is normal. Texture Solid food will feel strange at first, start slowly and simply. Softer textures are very important when first introducing fruit such as soft banana slices. Do this each day until your baby is looking for more. Over the next couple of weeks gradually increase the amount you are giving and slowly introduce new flavours, colours and textures so your little one can develop the mouth control they need. Stockists: Clicks, www.takealot.com and www.babiesafrica.com

April 14, 2023

Bubblegummers are back! Strong, comfy, scented sneakers for building imagination without limits

Bata South Africa has brought back its top-selling, global children’s footwear range, Bubblegummers, promising to fuel the imagination of little ones once again with the coolest, comfiest shoes around. The new line of Bubblegummers high-tops and sneakers is out now in selected Edgars stores nationwide and online. A firm favourite for kids the world over, Bubblegummers have delivered lasting memories of fun and adventure for generations of children. They’re crafted for function, durability and great support for growing feet, but designed with colour and fun in mind. With elasticated laces and light-up soles – infused with a signature bubblegum scent – the new line includes a variety of styles, designs, colours and sizes, packaged in a super sturdy and lightweight fit that’s perfect for active and playful kids. Bata Country Manager, Michael Wyatt, says: “Every pair of Bubblegummers is designed with the most advanced technology to ensure that kids can play and explore in comfort and safety in their early years. Bubblegummers is all about combining fun, form and function, and we’re confident that kids and parents alike will love the innovation and aesthetic appeal that have been incorporated into the design of this new line.” Bubblegummers footwear innovation The new Bubblegummers range of sneakers is antibacterial and breathable thanks to special Bubble Breathe technology. Bubble flex helps the shoes adapt comfortably to the energetic movements of childhood. Bubble absorption in the sole of the shoe keeps busy little feet protected, while a non-slip bubble grip supports the child’s stability as they explore the world. Bubble health keeps feet fresh and free from odour-causing bacteria, thanks to sanitised insoles. And to top it off, there’s bubble smell, with a signature Tutti Frutti bubblegum fragrance infused into every pair of Bubblegummers. The Bubblegummers range caters for girls and boys, and all shoes are designed with a child’s general developmental goals and ages in mind. Bubblegummers for infants are soft, yet offer protection from unexpected bumps, while shoes for pre-school children have an easy fit and are flexible for energetic toddlers who want to play. “Children take up to 16 000 steps every day as they play and keep active. As parents it’s our responsibility to encourage play and physical activity, which are necessary for growth. This is why the Bubblegummers range is designed to allow for flexibility and protection, with the colours and technologies that your children need to grow up healthy and happy, as they build their imagination without limits,” says Wyatt. Shop Bubblegummers at selected Edgars outlets nationwide, and Edgars online. Sizes range from toddler size 6 to 10 and kids’ size 11 to 3, for boys and girls. Follow Bubblegummers on social media: Instagram: @bubblegummers_za Facebook: Bubblegummers_ZA

April 14, 2023

Bossy Kids – How to assist your take-charge child

Making friends is no easy task. It takes a lot of growing confidence and a positive self-image to crack the code of successful and happy friendships. As children go through their pre-primary years it is often a struggle to gain acceptance from peers, and not be the isolated child roaming the playground. Children often seek control over their lives and worry about having their needs met. Often times the behaviours which they display in this regard may make them come across as a bit of a tyrant. They have big ideas running through their minds and they want things to be done exactly right. They tend to be egocentric and want others to play the way they want to play, and struggle to take “no” for an answer. If this is your child, take note, as it may quite possibly lead to bigger problems in the long run if not nurtured appropriately. As adults we tend to be bossy too, but recognise when things are not working out and instead formulate new action plans. Children on the other hand find it difficult to move beyond their own immediate needs. For some, bossiness is momentary, while others have a naturally dominant personality. This in turn could lead to more consistent bossy behaviour. Tell-tale signs of a ‘bossy’ kid include: Telling other kids that they do things wrong, having difficulty waiting for a turn (more often than not), disagreeing with rules (and/or often creating new rules), focusing on winning, and interrupting often. Those learners with a more dominant personality will also try to gain some control, test one’s limit, be attention seeking, and copy the behaviour of other children or an adult. Ultimately bossy children tend to be bright, gifted, assertive and creative. If nurtured properly these traits can become an asset in developing appropriate leadership skills. However, if left untamed bossy children may well feel and become more isolated within any environment. Parents and other adults can be important teachers as children learn how to get along with their friends. They need your help in understanding what works and what doesn’t work. And most importantly, they need your encouragement as they build strong friendships. Here are some key tips to help tone down that bossy-boots: Tips to tone down bossiness Tip #1: Satisfy the need to be in charge Look for opportunities where your child can have power to make decisions or take control. Provide choices when it comes to food, chores, dressing, play and other daily activities. Tip #2: Model how to give directions Often times our kids simply repeat the behaviours they learn from watching us. Stop and take a look at how you ask your spouse and your kids to do things. Modelling our own requests in a positive, calm manner can make a big difference in how our kids talk to their siblings and peers. Practice mutual respect. Apologise when you make a mistake and keep your voice firm but calm when correcting behaviours. And avoid humiliation when correcting bossy behaviour in a group setting, by rather taking your child aside and pointing out specifics, followed by examples of more appropriate ways to handle the situation. Tip #3: Role-Play Look for as many situations as possible to take advantage of modelling, turn-taking and asking permission to do things with other people, rather than being bossy. Get your children to use those active imaginations in a role-play, using puppets and stuffed toys working through issues such as negotiation, speaking out about feelings and finding alternative positive ways of how heated situations may be handled better. You could also do a role reversal: Allow your child to be you for fifteen minutes. She gets to make and enforce the rules, choose the meals, and run the show. Watch out! It will probably be fairly eye opening! Tip #4: Say “yes” whenever possible No one likes to be told “No” the majority of the time and let’s face it, pre-schoolers make unreasonable requests all day long and get told “No” on a regular basis. This is often deflating. Rather look for opportunities to say “Yes” to your child whenever possible, so that he feels like his personal wants and needs are being met. Tip #5: Play board games Most bossy kids have the need to win. Board games are a wonderful opportunity to nonchalantly enforce turn-taking and playing by a set of rules. It’s also a good moment to reinforce that the joy can be in the game itself, rather than the outcome. Be excited about the game and how much fun it is enjoying the time you are spending together, not about who is winning or losing. This will help plant the seed that it’s not about winning, it’s about interacting and enjoying an experience together. Even with it being quite frustrating, always make yourself as parent/guardian available, aware and ready to jump in when your child needs help with which behaviours are bossy and how to change them. Bossiness can’t be cured overnight, but the sooner you start the sooner your child will learn to play and be fair towards others. Now that we know how to assist a bossy child, let’s take a look at ways of encouraging a sensitive child to stand up to Miss Bossy Boots. Having been a teacher in the Foundation Phase I often came across sensitive learners being taken advantage of and suddenly I realised that teaching and encouraging parents to teach their children to stand up for themselves was far more important than encouraging an easy going personality. You can’t change a child’s inherent nature, but you can help kids stick up for their right, with confidence. Being assertive helps in virtually every relationship at school, at home and on the playground. In the classroom, it puts a child at an advantage because she’s comfortable commanding the teacher’s attention, raising her hand if she knows the answer, and asking for extra help if she is lost. She will also have

April 14, 2023

Why it’s important to sterilise your baby’s bottles

Sterilising baby bottles may seem like a tedious job, and let’s be honest, it can be! But although it’s not the most exciting chore, it’s one of the most important ones. It’s really important to sterilise baby’s feeding equipment as it helps to protect your baby’s developing immune system from potentially harmful bugs and bacteria. A baby’s immune system is not yet fully developed, and babies are more susceptible to infection and illness than older children and adults are. Sterilising baby’s feeding equipment for the first 12 months is of the utmost importance to protect their developing immune system from potentially harmful bacteria. A lot of mothers ask if it’s really necessary to sterilise feeding equipment in areas where tap water is safe to drink. The answer to that, is yes. Although your baby will be at lower risk, the risk is not eliminated. Because of your baby’s immature immune system, water that is safe for an adult, will not necessarily be safe for them. It is also important to remember that harmful bacteria does not just come from water – it can be transferred by your hands or even from milk remains in the bottle. It’s better to be safe than sorry. To sterilise effectively, you should make sure that all bottles, teats and accessories are disassembled and washed thoroughly with warm soapy water and rinsed clean before sterilising. You can leave the sterilised contents inside your steriliser for 24 hours, but make sure the lid is kept closed for the duration. Ensure you re-assemble items with clean hands or sterilised tongs if you can and always on a clean surface too. The inside of the steriliser lid is perfect for this. Time with your baby is precious. The vital baby® NURTURE™ 2 in 1 combination steriliser is designed to make the sterilising process as quick and simple as possible. The vital baby® NURTURE™ 2 in 1 combination steriliser has been designed to give you ultimate convenience and peace of mind, killing 99.9% bacteria to keep your baby healthy and happy. This microwave and cold water steriliser combination offers total flexibility depending on your needs. It keeps contents sterile for a full 24 hours when the lid is kept closed. This is really useful, so you can always have a sterile bottle close to hand. You can choose to sterilise in either the microwave with only water using steam for a chemical-free clean, or using the cold water method with sterilising solution added. The large capacity holds up to 4 wide neck bottles, teats, collars, caps and tongs. This steriliser is also suitable for standard neck bottles and accessories such as breast pumps and their components, soothers and teethers. It can be easily stored in the microwave when not in use and can be easily transported when travelling with baby. Sterilising time is just 4 minutes in the microwave (based on an 850W microwave). Vital Baby products are available at: Clicks, Babies R Us, Baby City and online at Babies Africa, Loot and Takealot. Learn more about Vital Baby on www.vitalbaby.co.za or follow them on social media @vitalbabysa.

April 14, 2023

It’s Scrabble’s 75th Anniversary!

The Iconic Game of Wits and Words Celebrates 75 Years of Fun Around the World on National Scrabble Day Scrabble, the iconic word game that has brought joy to millions of people around the world for 75 years, today celebrates its milestone anniversary on National Scrabble Day. The game that started as a passion project by US architect, Alfred Mosher Butts in 1948 has become a beloved game enjoyed by people of all ages with over 165 million sets having been sold to date. Since its creation, Scrabble has stood the test of time, becoming one of the most popular and enduring board games in history. Its success is built upon a simple truth: It’s not how many words you know, but how you use them that matters. The tactical game of wits and words keeps on reinventing itself with dynamic innovations welcoming a new look that embraces all players, both long-time fans and newcomers. And Scrabble continues to inspire enthusiasm across the globe with its latest extensions including Scrabble Junior, Scrabble Trap Tiles and Scrabble Vision, which has brought augmented reality to game play. The brand is set to enjoy future success as it carries on joining forces with fan favourites like Harry Potter and Star Wars. Ray Adler, Vice President, and Global Head of Games at Mattel said “We are thrilled to be celebrating 75 years of the ground-breaking strategic word game Scrabble. After 75 years, Scrabble continues to be one of the most iconic games in the world by fostering meaningful connections across generations, harnessing the power of words, and celebrating the benefits of positive expression. An ethos brought vividly to life by players enjoying the simple fun of building words together on a shared game board. We hope you too are sharing the fun beyond words of Scrabble today!” In the UK, to celebrate Scrabble’s 75th anniversary & the forthcoming coronation of King Charles III who also turns 75 this year, milliner to the stars Justin Smith has created a crown of Scrabble tiles, inspired by the St Edward’s Crown of the real British Crown Jewels. Renowned for creating couture headwear for Hollywood stars including Angelina Jolie, Emma Thompson and Amal Clooney, the British milliner’s playful take on St Edward’s Crown will go on display in London from National Scrabble Day April 13th until the King’s coronation on May 6th. In France, spoken word artist (or ‘slameuse’ in French) Chloe M has created an ode to Scrabble. Inspired by her favourite game’s 75th anniversary and her love of the French language (‘la langue vivante’), the gifted wordsmith is marking the occasion by performing her ‘Scrabble slam’ in front of Paris’ Eiffel Tower. Globally, adult Scrabble fans are encouraged to post their proudest Scrabble moments and endeavours using the #75yearsofScrabble. In honour of its anniversary year, Scrabble’s 75th commemorative edition will be available to buy this summer. It is the most premium Scrabble ever built, made from more sustainable materials than any previous version of Scrabble to date. Featuring an espresso-stained wooden gameboard casing and tile racks, wood tiles and a rotating board with a gameboard grid. Scrabble is now available in 30 languages across 120 countries around the world, with Ukrainian being the latest language to be introduced in 2006, along with Scrabble having also been in braille for the visually impaired. As it celebrates its landmark birthday, Scrabble is perfectly positioned to rack up another 75 years of fun beyond words.

April 13, 2023

HOW TO HANDLE THE 2-YEAR SLEEP REGRESSION

There is a reason why they call it the terrible two’s and the behavior issues you might be having with your toddler is the classic chicken-egg situation with sleep. Your child’s’ development could be affecting their sleep BUT lack of sleep could make them seriously cranky during the day. What is a sleep regression? A sleep regression is a period where your toddler sleeps worse than normal. The worse sleep might entail struggling to fall asleep or waking up more than usual at night. It might also mean being awake for extended periods of time at bedtime or throughout the night. How long it lasts depends on the age of your child. Why do sleep regressions happen? Sleep regressions are caused by development. Mental, physical or emotional development are factors that depend on the age of a toddler. Thus when your toddler is growing (which is most of the time) this consequent development can disrupt their sleep for various reasons. With your 2-year-old, the main culprit is emotional development, and your toddler is starting to see the world in a very new and complex way. These complex and new feelings can make your toddler feel afraid and uncertain, causing them to be scared of the dark or just not liking to be alone. This is also usually the time when new siblings arrive and these changes could also trigger separation anxiety. Since their movement and language are improving by the day, it can give them an arrogant independence and a strong desire to do things on their own, which could have a major impact on bedtime. They also always seem to have a lot better things to do than sleep. Implementing clever stalling tactics to delay sleep are common problems parents of toddlers face. All these things can add to the fun of being the parent of a toddler, but these can also cause big frustration pointed at this regression. How long does 2-year sleep regression last? This can last between 1 and 3 weeks. Unfortunately, it can also come and go over several weeks. When does it happen? Like any development milestone, the regression does NOT happen exactly on the day your toddler turns two but could happen anywhere between 18 and 30 months. How long does it last? This can last anywhere from a couple of days to a couple of weeks. How to survive the 2-year sleep regression? The most important thing during this regression is to remain consistent. During this time of stormy emotions and changes in development, it is important to stick to what your toddler knows as this will give them a sense of security. Keep in mind that this is only a phase and NOW is not the time to start new habits such as lying with your toddler, or feeding them at night again. You know they can do it! Give them a chance to move through the phase. Giving in to their every whim or emotion could just give them the leverage they need to do exactly that, what THEY want. They are only toddlers and unfortunately don’t yet know what is good for them. So discipline does come into play. You need to be clear about the boundaries and verbalize what sleep entails: ‘Close your eyes, stay in your bed, keep quiet until the sun comes up.’ Give them options and help build their independence. ‘We are only going to read two stories, but you can pick which ones’. ‘Mommy is not going to stay until you sleep but I will lie here for 2 songs, you can choose which ones’. Your toddler still requires 11 to 12 hours of nighttime sleep. So don’t be tempted to move your bedtime later. Overtiredness is the main reason for stalling tactics, so keep aiming for bedtime between 18h00 and 19h00. It might be time to shorten your toddler’s nap. Once again don’t be tempted to completely remove the nap too quickly but rather start by shortening it and not letting them sleep longer than 60 to 90 minutes. Some extra comfort, undistracted one-on-one time as part of bedtime (especially if there is a new baby in the house) can be helpful. You are allowed to lie with your child, massage them but try not to do it until they are asleep. You need to keep the balance of filling up the emotional cup but also showing them that you know that they can fall asleep on their own. If your toddler verbalizes fears it might be helpful to implement a night light. Phone your nearest consultant. Our consultants help you custom make a plan for your family, responsibly by incorporating all the building blocks. We also support you for 2 weeks to help you implement the plan. Even though sleep regressions can cause sleep disruptions, the important thing to remember is that if you remain consistent it should only be a phase. If your little one slept well before regression, they should get back into it after the phase, and the regression should not be a reason to start negative associations. By Jolandi Becker – MD of Good Night

April 4, 2023

Language development – take note of the role of music!

We’re SUPER excited about MUSIC as a catalyst for learning. Our excitement comes from years of experience as we’ve watched the effect that music-based activities have on children. What’s really exciting, is that our experience is continually backed up by research coming from prominent NEUROSCIENTISTS across the world. The “we” I’m talking about is Wriggle and Rhyme, a proudly South African MUSIC PROGRAMME for babies, toddlers and pre-schoolers from 6 months to 6 years old. Our mission is to introduce children to music-based activities in their early years, because: music is such a fun and highly effective medium for learning! music brings people together! So, that’s exactly what our programme aims to do! What does the research say? As the years have passed, more and more research is being done on the effects of music on growing brains. This research validates our anecdotal experience from our classes. We witness the incredible effect that music has on the children participating in our musical adventures! It would make sense to assume that SINGING SONGS, in particular, has a helpful part to play in language development – in terms of repetition, vocabulary extension, auditory memory, rhythm and rhyme – all of which are the building blocks of speech. We see this constantly in our RHYMERS classes (for children from 18 month – 3 years old) and PRE-SCHOOL classes (up to Grade R)However, research indicates that MUSIC ITSELF contributes to speech, even before the words begin to be understood. The building blocks of language “Infants listen first to sounds of language and only later to its meaning,” says Anthony Brandt. Differentiating different sounds is one of the key components to language development. Babies will start by gurgling and babbling to try and imitate their caregivers speech … these are the building blocks of language. When you think about the structure of a song – its different musical components, such as tempo, timbre, dynamics – one can see why music is so effective in forming the “scaffolding” on which speech is then built. The importance of singing One of the most obvious benefits of singing words, rather than only using instrumental music-based activities, is the opportunity to introduce and extend a child’s vocabulary. Because of the way that music impacts our memories, words are more readily embedded when they’re sung, rather than just said. Rhythm and reading Nina Kraus and her colleagues at the Auditory Neuroscience Laboratory of North-western University (Illinois, USA) have been researching the links between rhythm, speech recognition and reading. Over the course of their tests they found those who had more musical training not only kept better time, but had better neural responses to speech. Conversely, children who were poor readers tended to have difficulty tapping a consistent beat. Time to pick up our drums and start to play in time to the music! There’s so much more that we could say and the research is persuasive and ongoing … but one thing is for sure – when it comes to LANGUAGE DEVELOPMENT: Take note of the role of music! About the author: Kirsty Savides is the Founder and Programme Director of Wriggle and Rhyme, South Africa. She is absolutely passionate about music education and aims to share this passion with parents and educators to promote music-based learning in early childhood. Wriggle and Rhyme classes run across Cape Town, with opportunities to grow further afield. If you’d like to find out more about the Wriggle and Rhyme business opportunity, take a look at the OUR TEAM / JOIN THE TEAM tab on their website. Website – www.wriggleandrhyme.co.za Facebook and Instagram – #wrigglerhyme @wrigglerhyme YouTube – Wriggle & Rhyme SA

March 30, 2023

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