Advice from the experts
Toptots Head Office

How drawing develops in a toddler

There are very definite developmental stages in drawing. Every child is different, however when it comes to their art there is a very clear developmental line that can be seen. Keep samples of your child’s artwork at the different stages. Often at our workshops the scribbles done by toddlers are left behind and not seen to have any value. Before your child can draw anything you will recognise that he has to be exposed to different items to draw and paint with. Experience is key to development. Did you know that one of the recognised “tests” that they ask a pre-schooler to do, is to draw a stick figure? Scribbling is typical of a 1.5 year old. This is not about the result but about the process and enjoyment. The more they scribble, the more fun they have and the more they learn to control the medium they are using. This scribbling is more a kinaesthetic activity.  You will notice that after 6 months of scribbling the marks start to become more orderly. Scribbling helps develop hand eye coordination, fine and gross muscle development and hand manipulation. Drawing circular shapes is typical of a 2 – 3 year old. They will spend many a happy time making circles. Once circles have started emerging you will find the very typical stick figure drawing of a 3+ year old. The big head, legs and arms that come from there. As they develop, more of a body image starts to appear, the body, the legs etc. At this stage they start to think about what they are actually drawing and are learning to problem solve. Enjoy these first drawings of your child’s and appreciate them for what they are – just stages in your child’s development. Remember that drawing plays a very important role in your child’s emotional, cognitive and physical development. With drawing he will learn to express his emotions and build up his self-esteem. Provide your child with a variety of mediums to draw with. Don’t tell him what to draw, rather let him explore and experiment and do it on his own. Praise his work and hang it up in your home – this will encourage him to create even more beautiful works of art for you. Sharing our content with parents you know will go a long way to making us smile for the day 

Parenting Hub

New Pure Beginnings Baby & Kids Sensitive Sun Milk

Pure Beginnings Baby & Kids Sensitive Milk SPF 50+ Offers very high broad-spectrum protection (UVA/UVB) against the sun. It is water resistant and is manufactured with 100% natural mineral filters which are guaranteed free from nanoparticles. It is suitable from ages of 6 months and older. Although designed for baby and kids, the product is perfect for the whole family, especially for people with sensitive skins who may react to chemical based sunscreens. Recommended  Retail Price: R249.99 Very high broad-spectrum protection Free from Nanoparticles 100% Natural Mineral Filters Water Resistant Natural mineral filters, Titanium Dioxide and Zinc Oxide protect skin from the sun Aloe Vera soothes sensitive skin and helps nourish and heal the skin. Karanja Oil assists in regenerating the skin and adds moisture to soften and nourish. Rapeseed Oil is excellent at improving the elasticity of the skin, while hydrating and nourishing it. Carrot Root Extract is included to help nourish dry skin and ease sensitivity. Pure Beginnings is very proud to be offering South African consumers a product which is not only affordable and effective, but also certified organic by Ecocert giving them the peace of mind that they are making the safest choice for their family. With a great deal of greenwashing ,false natural and organic claims on many products, certification by a recognized organisation makes it easier for the consumer.

Parenting Hub

Characteristics of a good camp counselor

Whether you want to work as a camp counselor, or you are a parent searching for the best holiday camp for your children; it is good to know what makes a good camp counselor so that you know what to look for. The best holiday camp doesn’t necessarily have the most impressive facilities or best equipment. The best sleepover camp has the best counselors. This alone has been found to be the primary deciding factor as to whether kids will want to return to a camp or not. In addition to having a passion for working with children and enjoying outdoor activities, the best counselors often have the following traits: 1.    Initiative Taking the initiative to do something before someone asks you to, is one of the most important characteristics of a good camp counselor. For example, if you see something on a path that someone could possibly trip on and hurt themselves, a good camp counselor has the insight and initiative to remove it out of harms way. In supervising children, this characteristic is essential. 2.    Selflessness At camp, the children always come first. What would you do if you’re really tired, and a child cannot go to bed because they’re feeling homesick? A good camp counselor will sacrifice their sleep to ensure that the child is made comfortable. Throughout a camp, counselors are expected to make sacrifices for the benefit of the children. 3.    Positive Role Model As a camp counselor, it’s important to note that your behavior can be emulated by others, especially by the younger children. Camp counselors need to lead by example. For example, a camp counselor cannot tell the children that technology isn’t allowed at camp, and thereafter, get caught using their mobile phone when they think everyone is asleep. Neither can camp counselors express negative emotions, swear or be ill-mannered, as these present a bad example to the children they supervise. 4.    Creativity Good camp counselors, like good baby sitters and teachers need to be able to use their imagination in order prevent boredom. Camp counselors need to think outside of the box and constantly come up with new and exciting activities to keep children entertained. 5.    Resilience  There are always challenges and unpleasant situations that camp counselors have to deal with – anything from late working nights to gossip, dealing with bullying or upset parents. In order for camp to run smoothly, camp counselors need to be able to deal with difficult situations in an honest and diplomatic way. If you are interested in working as a camp counselor at a holiday camp and you have the above characteristics, then you are an ideal candidate.  On the other hand, if you are a parent looking for a good holiday camp, these traits may give you some ideas when you ask a camp what they look for when they hire their staff. You should also ask whether they require a police clearance from all staff, and what training their staff receive beforehand. Sharing our content with parents you know will go a long way to making us smile for the day 

Helen Hansen

The importance of play

The intelligence of play occurs way beyond the naked eye. The world of ‘pretend’ is a necessary means of intellectual and emotional development for young children who are absorbing new experiences all the time. This safe space provides the opportunity to explore emotions and situations that are relevant for the child at a particular time. Different stages of childhood mean different types of play.  Creativity and curiosity are the basis of play, no matter what the age. For example, babies and toddlers explore and express their curiosity through body movement. This prepares the brain for the next development phase. While younger children generally play for no reason other than pleasure, older children enjoy working towards a specific outcome. Joseph Chilton Pearce states in his book ‘Evolution’s End’, “Play develops intelligence, integrates our triune nature; prepares us for higher education, creative thought and helps us prepare for becoming an effective parent when that time comes”. If you are tempted to cut your child’s playtime, remember that oxytocin, a hormone and brain chemical described as the “love molecule”, is released through play. In effect, playing, is like having a boost of goodness injected into your body improving mood and the immune system. Children learn first and foremost how to play from parents and siblings.  Added to this is free-play where the child plays alone, making his/her own decision about what to do.  Social and solo play is an essential ingredient for the daily life of children of all ages. Author: Helen Hansen is a kinesiologist with extensive experience in early childhood development and developmental psychology.  You can read more about play in Helen’s recently released book, ‘150 inspiring educational activities for 2 to 7 year olds’.   Helen offers therapy sessions for children and adults to balance imbalances in the body, mind and emotions.  You can contact Helen: [email protected] https://www.amazon.com/Inspiring-Educational-Activities-year-olds/dp/1504370996 Sharing our content with parents you know will go a long way to making us smile for the day 

Parenting Hub

Will you bank them, or bin them? Wise up on stem cells before it’s too late.

Becoming a parent is fraught with responsibilities. Prospective parents should know the facts about the life-saving abilities of umbilical cord stem cells so that they can make informed decisions for their families. Stem cells should be called master cells as they can replicate, regenerate and differentiate themselves into any one of 200 different specialised cells in the body, and are used to treat over 80 potentially life-threatening blood related diseases including leukaemia, lymphoma and bone marrow failures. Blood stem cell transplantation, using stem blood cells from sources such as bone marrow, has been performed for more than 50 years, with more than one million blood stem cell transplants across the world playing an important role in the treatment of bone marrow failures, blood cancers, blood disorders, metabolic diseases, immune deficiencies and autoimmune diseases. Cryo-Save South Africa has listed the top 10 most noteworthy facts about stem cells that you need to know: Stem cells are your body’s internal repair system Stem cells continuously replace dead or diseases cells with healthy ones to maintain a normal functioning body. They fall into two major groups; pluripotent and multipotent stem cells. Pluripotent stem cells are powerful, meaning they can develop into any type of cell in your body. However, these cells are still fraught with ethical controversy. Multipotent stem cells, also called adult stem cells, can develop certain tissue cells to maintain your body’s organs as you age, such as blood-forming stem cells. Blood-forming stem cells produce new and healthy red blood cells to carry oxygen to all parts of our body; white blood cells to fight bacteria; and platelets which form clots to pervert excessive bleeding. Best time to collect stem cells is at birth  Stem cells age as we age, so the best time to collect blood stem cells is at birth. These cells have not been exposed to pollution and poor lifestyle choices and can therefore offer greater therapeutic possibilities and better transplant outcomes. Stem cells from umbilical cord blood don’t need to be a 100% match for transplants Although your baby’s umbilical cord blood stem cells are a 100% perfect match for own use, there is a 25% probability for a 100% match for siblings. However, unlike bone marrow transplants, you often don’t need a 100% match using cord blood stem cells, which means the probability of finding a suitable donor is so much greater. Stem cell storage is not that costly Stem cell storage is available to anyone who wishes to store their baby’s umbilical cord stem cells. Cryo-Save offers multiple cost options and interest-free payment plans from as little as R273.00 per month to store cord blood and R350.00 per month for storing both cord blood and tissue. Mixed ethnicity parents should store stem cells The chances of finding a perfect matching blood stem cell donor for an allogeneic (matching donor) transplant are only 1:1,00,000, but the odds are much lower for anyone from a mixed-race family Despite its diverse ethnic make-up, Africa has no public cord blood stem cell bank, which makes the likelihood of finding a matching donor even more challenging. Therefore, Cryo-Save encourages mixed race families to store their babies’ stem cells. Banking stem cells is not just for families with a history of cancer Many people don’t realise that stem cells now play a part in the treatment of over 80 blood diseases and conditions. Every day we are seeing more diseases developing, and more clinical trials are taking place to identify treatments of many of these diseases. Some of the most promising research is being done to use children’s’ own umbilical cord blood stem cells in the treatment of cerebral palsy and autism. Additionally, statistics show that more than 90% of cancers develop due to lifestyle factors, not genetics, and that the incidence of cancer is increasing. Stem cell collection is a safe medical procedure Collecting stem cells from an umbilical cord is quick, painless and non-invasive, posing no medical risk to mother or baby. It is only after the clamping that the blood and tissue are collected from the umbilical cord for stem cell processing. Stem cell banking is possible with any type of birth Cord blood and cord tissue collections can be performed at both vaginal and caesarean deliveries. Immediately following the birth but before the placenta is delivered, the healthcare provider collects the cord blood from the baby’s umbilical cord. You can store your second child’s stem cells if you didn’t store for your first child Today, umbilical cord stem cells are used in more than a third of blood stem cell transplants around the world. Siblings have a 25% chance of being a perfect match. But because cord blood stem cells do not require a perfect match for transplant, the likelihood that siblings will be a match is much higher. Therefore, storing your second child’s stem cells has the possibility, depending on the degree of matching, to treat your first child should a stem cell transplant be required and may also be used for other immediate family members. Stem cell storage is available in South Africa Cryo-Save has been storing umbilical cord stem cells for families all over the world since 2000. It is the leading family stem cell bank in Europe and ranked fifth most influential cord blood bank in the world by Bio Informant. Cryo-Save South Africa offers both local and international storage options in either Pretoria or Europe for both cord blood and cord tissue. This local laboratory complies with the highest international standards and importantly complies to the coveted American Association of Blood Banks accreditation standards. Just as some people need organ transplants to treat or cure diseases, blood stem cells can be transplanted too. If the blood forming stem cells in our bodies cannot produce healthy cells or stop producing cells completely, we cannot function normally and our stem cells will have to be REPLACED with healthy ones that can be found in the bone marrow or umbilical cord blood. Sometimes these stem

Advtech Group

Help your Child Play (right) to lay the Foundation for Future Academic Success

Giving their children a head start is something parents want to do. Unfortunately, the way this is done in our hyper-competitive, over structured world may in fact be working against exactly these intentions.  More and more research is showing that the most critical activity for the development of little children’s brains and their social and cognitive skills, before they go to school, is good old-fashioned play.  Far less is gained when little children have full schedules of structured activities, from basic maths classes to early reading, gymnastics, kiddy music and mini-soccer. “When it comes to brain development, time spent in the classroom and at other structured activities is less important than time on the playground,” says Barbara Eaton, Academic Development Advisor for the Pre-Primary Schools Division at ADvTECH, Africa’s largest private education provider. She says that research by Sergio Pellis, from the University of Lethbridge in Canada, showed that the experience of play changed the connections of the neurons in the pre-frontal section of a child’s brain, and that without play experience, those neurons remained unchanged. “Pellis found that it was those changes in the prefrontal cortex during childhood that helped wire up the brain’s executive control centre, which has a critical role in regulating emotions, making plans and solving problems. In other words, play prepares a young brain for life, love and even schoolwork,” Eaton says. But she warns parents whose children’s rooms look like toyshops that they need to get things back to basics, because the kind of play that is beneficial is primarily the kind of play that requires creativity, imagination and problem-solving. “In the pre-school phase children need basic toys, not those with roles defined by the media, as the latter limits imagination and the opportunities to plan and create. Provide the child with a good set of plain wooden bricks, a few non-battery-operated cars, a soft doll or two, a teddy, some plastic plates and cups and a big ball. “Old blankets or sheets for making houses and tents, and some boxes and crates will provide the basics for endless creative and imaginative play. Playdough, some crayons and big sheets of paper – not colouring books – as well as some paint will amply provide for creativity,” says Eaton. She says that parents need to appreciate that in allowing their children plenty of opportunities to play, with others and alone, they are laying the foundations for academic success. “Young children work hard at play, and it is not for nothing that play is considered a child’s work. They invent scenes and stories, solve problems and negotiate their way through social roadblocks. They know what they want to do and they work and plan to do it. “We as adults must not be too quick to interfere in this process, but allow them to work things out for themselves.” Parents who want to ensure their children are exposed to the right kind of free play (which ironically is also the least expensive kind) should ensure that they provide, from an early age, access to materials that will stimulate their sensory systems. These include water, sand, things that make a noise, books with pictures they can relate to and toys of different textures. “The contents of your saucepan and plastics cupboard will give hours of creative play while teaching concepts of matching, size, shape, texture and sound. Things that bounce, roll and change shape when pressed or pulled help develop spatial skills and visual acuity,” says Eaton. “Children must be free to move around once they are mobile, obviously with safety in mind, but do not fear the odd mouthful of grass or your child being dirty. Allow them to dig in the garden, pick flowers and when they are older, make mud cakes and grass ‘soup’ for their fantasy games.” The Russian psychologist Lev Vygotsky found that children are able to rise above their average behaviour through play, notes Eaton. “It is through fantasy play that children make sense of their world. They must pretend and take on roles in order to understand. The more time children spend in dramatic play, the more they advance in terms of intellectual development and their ability to concentrate. “As a parent, it is best to curb the growing fashionable trend of extra murals for little children and allow uninterrupted time and space for fantasy play.  Choose a pre-school that believes passionately in play based learning. This allows children to work through emotions such as anger, fear and jealousy, to become more self-disciplined, and to develop resilience. All these skills are essential to the development of individuals who can in future master academic challenges and live comfortably in their society.”

Mia Von Scha

Holiday Blue’s

December: Time for festive lights and great food and fun with the family and holidays and presents and singing and cheer and… suicide. What?! Yes, despite the festivities, this is the time where depression and suicide are most prevalent. All the pressure to have a good time and the fantasy of how perfect it is going to be can be downright miserable, and if you’re already prone towards depression can really take you down the spiral. Depression is a whole body-mind phenomenon, and so there are many things that you can focus on and shift in your life to both prevent and treat depression. Of course, if you’ve already gone so far down into hell that you can’t even imagine implementing these things then you need to get some help, but my xmas wish for you is that you take note of these things before you disappear down the rabbit hole. This is a summary of my full depression checklist that I use myself to give myself a leg-up when I need it. Check in with yourself regularly and make sure that you have these basics in place: EXERCISE/MOVEMENT: This is the single most effective and most underutilized treatment for depression. Get up off the couch! DIET: The key things here (other than good all round nutrition) are Omega 3’s, probiotics, magnesium, Vitamin D and the B Vitamins and water. Make sure you’re getting these in your diet, or supplement. ILLNESS: Make sure your depression isn’t a remnant of a previous illness. Allow yourself time for recovery. ENERGY LEVELS: Take a break. Get enough sleep! STRESS LEVELS: Breathe, breathe, breathe. HORMONES: Don’t confuse your life falling apart with a bout of PMS. APPEARANCE: Look after yourself – treat yourself to a manicure, a new outfit, a homemade facemask. PURPOSE: Do something every day that moves your soul. BOREDOM: Sign up for an online course, go to an interesting talk, read a good book. DAILY GRIND: Add some fun into your week and prioritise. GOALS: Take some baby steps towards something meaningful to you. TRAUMA: Find the growth points in what you have been through or get some help to work through your past. SEASONAL: Brainstorm some fun ways to make the season more bearable for you. SOCIO-POLITICAL: Stop watching / listening to the news. Change the subject. Don’t get drawn into other people’s fears and negativity. CLUTTER: Do some Spring (Summer) cleaning. Start with a small area or just one drawer. MUSIC: Switch from Leonard Cohen to The Beatles! TOXINS: Clear out harmful chemicals from your home and life. CONNECTION: Reach out to a friend who really cares and is open to listening. FUN: Find enjoyable things to do with your family other than just day-to-day necessities. TIME: Get rid of irrelevant time wasters and see what in your life can be delegated to somebody else. WORRIES: Take action on niggling worries. ASSUMPTIONS: Question the things you are thinking (eg the mess in the house means nobody cares about me)… always ask: “Is this really true?” PERFECTIONISM: Let it go. You are enough (write this on your mirror now!) FANTASY: Let go of how you think life “should” look and appreciate it as it is. Find 3 things right now to be grateful for. Do this daily. DEPRESSION IS BAD: Depression is there to help you to grow, to reprioritize your life, and to get on track living your purpose. Question the idea that it is bad and see if you can gently welcome it in and allow it to change you! Life is not always going to be happy-go-lucky, and just because the festive season swings around at this time of your does not mean that your mood will too. Let go of the pressure to be joyous and filled with fun and allow yourself to be as you are. Take tiny steps towards addressing the things in the list above – just start with whatever you can manage and see how little changes over time amount to massive shifts. This festive season, be real, be safe and look after your whole self.

Parenting Hub

Deciding whether to keep a child back at school

Imagine that you are observing from the side of a swimming pool and are watching children learn how to swim. As you watch, you notice the different variety of abilities, confidence levels and fears that they display in the water.  Some children seem to grasp these new skills with ease while others seem to struggle and need a bit of extra assistance and encouragement along the way.  With a swimming gala looming ahead, the decision has to be made as to who is competent enough to compete at the next level, and who may need extra practice in mastering the skills that are needed. “In a scenario such as this one, it is without a doubt that any child who has not sufficiently mastered the skills at this level will become more fearful, less confident and progress slower if they were forced on to a more challenging level. They may even risk drowning in the process!” says Cindy Glass, Director and Co-founder of Step Up Education Centres. She adds that while learning to swim is not quite the same as learning to read, write and progress academically, the principal of learning any new skill is the same. “It is best to achieve sufficient mastery of each level of study before progressing to more challenging levels of learning.” Sadly, for generations, the need to repeat a school grade has been classified as a failure, leaving scores of parents and learners struggling to embrace the idea of repeating a grade to better master the necessary skills needed for the next level! “Yet, forcing a child, who is not ready, into the next grade could have a significantly negative impact on the child’s self- esteem and, worse, it could slow the learning process or even stop it altogether as the child’s struggles worsen with the pressures of the new grade!” Cindy explains. Cindy gives the following advice to parents facing the decision of whether to allow their child to repeat a grade or not: Repeating a grade is NOT a failure. It is an opportunity for a struggling learner to better master the skills he needs! If you speak of failure, your child will feel like he has, indeed, failed! Your approach to a child repeating the grade will determine your child’s reaction toward it! Discuss all available options with your child’s teachers before making a final decision. Have an open mind – remember that this is about what is best for your child.  Discuss any concerns that you may have openly and honestly. Consider your child’s level of competency in the current grade.  If your child is struggling significantly, he is most likely going to struggle even more so in the next grade. Consider your child’s age and physical development. Remember, always, that YOU need to decide what is BEST for your child.  A child who is significantly taller or older than his upcoming classmates may feel too embarrassed for a repeat to be of any help! Make a list of all the pros and cons of your child repeating the grade or going on. Ask yourself:  What is best for my child?  What are the long-term benefits or harms? What would happen if I do/do not allow the repeat? “There is no denying that the decision to repeat a struggling learner is an emotionally tough one to make.  Take your time and do what you feel is best for your child. Remember, how you react to the situation will set the tone for how your child responds to it!” Cindy concludes.

Parenting Hub

Review: Little Live Pets Lil’ Ladybug Garden Playset

  OMG Cuteness overload! This toy is such a simple concept but yet it kept our daughter playing with it for 4 hours on the first day and she is not slowing down anytime soon! These little lady bugs have their own little garden to crawl around in. From going up the grass to down the flower elevator this has to be on every girls Christmas Wish List.  You can purchase more ladybugs to two behind, although the Lil’ Ladybug Garden does come with one mama bug and a baby bug. There are 12 Lil’ Ladybugs to collect with 2 rare finds throw into the mix. The Little Live Pets range is such a cute range and features: Bird in Cage Glitzi House with Pet Mice Turtle Mouse Track Surprise Chick House For more information on this rang e- you have to visit and I mean have to visit  http://www.primatoys.co.za/little-live-pets/little-live-pets-ladybug-playset

Parenting Hub

Grade 11’s – Now (not next year) is the best time to consider your study options

With three months left before they enter their final year of school, Grade 11 learners could be tempted to make relaxing their only priority before the whirlwind year that is Matric. However now is precisely the time they should be investigating and even pinning down their further study plans, an education expert says. “Once you’ve started your Matric year, you will have very little time to focus on ensuring you choose the right course and the right institution for you, because of the workload, endless rounds of revision and exams, and all the fun and functions that go with your last year at school,” says Peter Kriel, General Manager at The Independent Institute of Education, SA’s largest and most accredited private higher education provider. Kriel says many Grade 12s get so caught up in the social and academic demands of their final year, that they don’t spend enough time ensuring they investigate all their options and apply timeously to university or private higher education. This could lead to them missing out on a space, settling for second best, and diluting their Matric study efforts with stress and anxiety about what they are going to do after school. “Another thing that Grade 11s are often not aware of, is that they can submit applications on the basis of their Grade 11 marks, which means that they can then focus wholely and completely on Grade 12, without further concern or distraction about what happens the year after. In addition, knowing what you want and where you are going at the start of the year, will also help you focus your study efforts, as you’ll know exactly what you need to achieve during the year and at your final exams.” Kriel says that the changed Higher Education landscape in South Africa means that prospective students now have many more options than what they had in the past, when the default approach was to enter a public university for a 3-year degree. But he warns that because there are so many more options now, prospective students also have more work to do to ensure that they find the right course and right institution for their unique goals. “Finding the right study direction should be on top of your priority list when finding out about what and where to study,” he says. “In addition, selecting an institution that will meet your needs is the most important aspect of helping you prepare for your future.” Kriel warns that while the websites and brochures of institutions may provide one with the basic information about which programmes are on offer, the process of applying and cost, merely looking at brochures and websites may not give you the type of information that would really allow you to make an informed decision. “In fact, all institutions would provide you with course information, but no institution will state that the size of the Business Management 1 class is over 500 or that it is really challenging getting academic support on campus. Therefore, the only way to find out about such underlying aspects is to ask the right questions. And to do so thoroughly takes time – time which you are not likely to have next year.” Kriel says when evaluating institutions, future students should attend open days, physically visit the campus, and make telephonic or written contact. “These actions and the way your inquiries are handled will provide a solid indication of what you can expect from an institution going forward.” For Grade 11s who are serious about getting their ducks in a row before jumping in the Matric pond, Kriel has a handy checklist that will help them determine which institutions will be able to provide them with the highest quality education. He says prospective students should ask institutions the following questions: How do your class sizes in this particular programme compare to other institutions or universities? (Keep in mind that the institution may not have in-depth information about the class sizes at other institutions, but you want to hear about this particular institution). How is classroom contact time and self-directed study balanced? (Self-directed study is an integral part of higher education and therefore as important as classroom contact). How is technology supporting the learning experience of students at this institution? (Merely having a data projector in classrooms or lecturers making presentations available electronically is not the response you are looking for). How important is employability of students after studying at your institution? (You want to listen out for responses that relate to industry ties, industry input into curricula, work readiness programmes, career centres, as well as the lecturing staff’s industry experience and relationships with industry). If I get stuck with an assignment or project, which resources and courses of action are available to me? (Only talking to your lecturer is not an ideal response. You want to listen for reference to, for example, library support and resources, writing centers and other forms of student support). Even if not applicable to you, it may also be a good idea to ask about the institution’s policy and support for students with special needs, for example needing extra time in assessments. (If they stumble in answering this question, it may be an indication that they are not really focused on this aspect of student support, which may be a sign about their overall student centeredness).

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Practical ways to enhance emotional intelligence in children

Emotional Intelligence is like freshly-squeezed orange juice!  When you squeeze an orange, you expect orange juice to flow out of it.  You wouldn’t expect to find grape or peach juice inside an orange because an orange only has orange juice to give. Human behavioural choices are based on what we have inside to give – much like that orange.  “What we have inside is based on how we feel about ourselves as a person. And… how we feel about ourselves as a person influences every choice we make!” says Cindy Glass, Director and Co-founder of Step Up Education Centres. She adds that every choice that we make defines the path of our lives! “All negative behaviours are based on fear, low self-esteem, self-defeating and destructive self-talk and low self-value. Consider, for a moment, how nobody, who values and respects himself would want to hurt another! The very act of self-value and self-respect ensures that he will give that out to others!  This is the reason why it is so important to teach and enhance emotional intelligence skills in our children!” Emotional intelligence is self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy and social skills all packed into one. Cindy adds that children who master emotional intelligence skills become better leaders, study more effectively, enjoy more fulfilling relationships with others, are better able to retain information, have better concentration skills and live happier more fulfilled lives. “In fact,” she says, “Schools who teach emotional intelligence skills even have fewer bullying incidences and learning for all is more exciting, creative and effective!” She gives parents and caregivers the following tips on how to enhance a child’s emotional intelligence skills: Communication is key. We need to talk to our children about their emotions and listen sincerely to their answers… without judgement.  This will help them become more aware of how they are feeling and, with your encouragement, they will find more positive solutions to any number of challenges. Use phrases such as: “How was your day?’  “What was the best/worst thing that happened today?’ “How did that make you feel?” “I hear you…”   “I can understand how that must have upset you…” Teach your children to take responsibility for the choices that they have made.  Blaming others has no value. We all make mistakes… own them and learn from them. Help your children understand that every choice has a consequence.  We are free to make any choice that we want.  The consequences, however, will be there no matter what. Teach your children to value who they are so that they will value others around them. Children do what we do and not what we say. It is vital for you to walk your talk.

Parenting Hub

Review: L.O.L Surprise Lil Sisters Ball

Prima Toys have come up with a WOW new edition for girls. The L.O.L Lil Sisters Surprise will have your little one guessing just what is inside.  The fun all starts when your little one unravels the 5 layers of surprises until they finally reach their little L.O.L Surprise Tot waiting inside. The product is ideal for girls ages 5 and up. Inside this fun surprise there is a secret message, collectable sticks, more than one accessory that goes perfectly with the L.O.L Lil Sisters. There are 45 dolls to collect in this range of collectables and certainly a fantastic stocking filler this Christmas. For more information visit http://www.primatoys.co.za/lol-surprise

Parenting Hub

Prima Baby welcomes Disney Baby

We at Prima Baby are honoured to announce that we are now the sole distributor of select products in the Disney Baby franchise. Home to some of the world’s most beloved characters like Mickey and Minnie Mouse, Winnie the Pooh and the fellow stars of the Hundred Acre Wood and many more, the Disney label has filled children’s hearts with joy for many, many years and been always top of its game in terms of quality, yet affordable merchandising. In fact, many mothers themselves grew up in the company of the characters and now they can pass that tradition along to their little ones. The ‘Baby’ component to the Disney label brings all the most beloved characters to life in their smaller, younger selves.  Adorable baby versions make these familiar friends even cuter than ever before. With products to appeal to every single aspect of your baby’s life – from feeding and nurturing to soothing and learning, Disney Baby is available in a variety of colours, from traditional, to pink and blue. All stock is available at selected major retailers and online stores.

Parenting Hub

Spectacles can mean the difference between success and failure for an underprivileged learner

Sight is something most people take for granted, yet at least 239 million children around the world suffer from impaired vision that could be corrected by spectacles. Since 80% of all learning occurs through vision, children who cannot afford spectacles are at a major disadvantage in education environments, which can lead to lower earning potential later in their lives.* As we observe World Sight Day on 12 October, the Adopt-a-School Foundation (AAS) encourages partners in the private sector, civil society, and government to support its efforts to address the issue of impaired vision that affects millions of underprivileged learners in South Africa. AAS first encountered this issue six years ago in Bodibe, a small village nestled in the rural part of the North West province, when they were conducting educator development programmes in 11 schools in the community.  Educators shared their frustrations with AAS, saying that many children were being disruptive and unable to concentrate. When AAS investigated the matter, they decided to test the learners’ eyesight, and found that more than half of the children had vision problems. “At AAS we use a unique Whole School Development (WSD) approach to school development,” says Banyana Mohajane, Head of Skills and Social Development at AAS.“Rather than tackle an individual issue, WSD works to improve the school holistically by focussing on the academic, infrastructural, social, and security environment in which a school operates. This includes issues such as learner health and well-being, and includes eyesight testing,” she continues. “Most children in our adopted schools have never had their eyes tested,” explains Mohajane. “Through the introduction of mobile eyesight testing clinics, we have found that up to 15% of these learners have vision problems, which could lead to poor academic performance,” she continues. The benefits of treating impaired vision are immediate and clear. Research by the World Economic Forum has found that simply correcting the vision of primary school students is equivalent to another six months of additional schooling in terms of test scores. There is also strong evidence that the provision of spectacles leads to higher earnings, and can lead to increases in GDP.* “Over the last six years we have partnered with optometrists to conduct nearly 60 000 eyesight tests. We have donated 2 697 pairs of spectacles to learners in need and have referred the more serious cases to specialists and the Department of Health,” continues Mohajane. “Together with our partners, we hope to test the eyesight of many more school children across South Africa,” she concludes. For more information on Adopt-a-School or to contribute to this programme, visit the Foundation’s website at www.adoptaschool.org.za,  email [email protected] or call 011 592 6430.

Barbara Harvey

How to be sure your child has a positive inner voice

In 2004, I started reading Dr. Phil McGraw’s book Self-Matters it is the first place I heard of and learned about the concept of elf-talk or the inner voice. I love the way he explained it. What I took away from it was the concept of a quietly running tape which urns underneath all the other voices in your life and this voice is the one where people live from. It is based on all the things you heard as a child not only about yourself but about the way life works in general these are the voices primarily of your parents. Therefore, it is what we hear our parents say about us and life that creates the foundations of our inner voice. As a parent coach, this caused me to step back and examine my whole concept of what it means to be an effective parent. I have concluded that effective parents have several things in common when it comes to creating a positive inner voice for themselves first and as a result for their children. I have found this can help even if their children go differing messages early if parents are willing to communicate these inner changes with their kids. Authenticity Examination of own Inner Voice Recognition of Values and Self Positive Parenting Authenticity is defined as living a life true to yourself. I believe authenticity is about aligning your life so the following parts of you are congruent. Beliefs Thoughts Feelings Words Actions As I was reading Dr. Phil’s book it began to occur to me I had no real idea what my self-talk was and how it was shaping my life. I began to wonder if other people felt the same way. At the time, I was working with a group of moms and I began to talk with them about what I was reading and how it was affecting my life and I wondered what they thought. It was amazing every woman in the group of 12 shared the same feeling. Exploring your own self-talk-taking the time to stop and get your mind and surroundings as quiet as possible while thinking about a decision. Finding out what our own inner voice was saying and deciding about whether this is what we wanted for our lives. We began to think about and create a space where we could be open and vulnerable with one another about how do develop our own self-talk. As we did so something interesting started to happen, the kids started to respond differently to how we interacted with them. Upon reflection, we recognized in developing our own connection with our inner voice it causes significant changes in our outer voice as well. This is where I began to realize that authenticity is the true foundation of parenting. I call authenticity living a life based on what I truly believe, and let that be the basis from which I think, say, feel, and act. Bringing my life into congruence. This causes me to be clearer on what I want and what I expect. Living an authentic life is not easy. If you want to learn more about it. I wrote a post for Inspire Me Today which gives a short post on how to start. Exploring your values and goals-Being authentic is primarily about exploring who you are and what you want in your life. I have created a list of ten questions I ask every client today. You can use them to help you think not only about the values you consider important. But, also why they are important to you. 1. What is the most important thing in your life? 2. What is your biggest dream? 3. Who are the most important people in your life and why? 4. If you could do anything in the world for your work life, what would it be? 5. If you could do anything in your personal life what would it be? 6. What do you spend the most time doing? 7. In one to three sentences write down what you would want people to say about you after you die. Are you living in a way in which people would say that? 8. What are your most important roles in life? Why? (I.e. mother, father, sister, friend) 9. What would you say living a spiritual life is to you? 10. If you could sit down to dinner with three important people in your life dead or alive and have; what three people would you ask> What would you ask them? These questions get down to the core of your belief system and therefore get to the heart of what your inner voice is saying to you. It was not until I came up with this list and answered the questions myself that I began to really define what my life was about and why. It was this understanding which gave me the courage to strike out on my own and start a nonprofit organization based on effective parenting. I firmly agree with Dr. Phil when he says, “you can’t lead where you haven’t been”. We adults need to know, understand, and adjust our own inner voice to be a positive one before we can ever get our children’s inner voice to be positive. This is because it is our voice which forms the foundation for the future inner voice of our kids. If we are not positive, they will not be either. How we answer the above 10 questions will help to know what you value and why. Once we know this we can then step back and examine how we feel about things and weigh what we think, say, and do based on these insights. Here is how we change our voice. Know our values and why we think they are important. Based on these values create positive statements to replace the negative ones which may come up. When making decisions listen to our inner voice for any negative feedback.

Parenting Hub

How to fix a broken diet?

Are you not getting the results you wanted or your diet plan stopped working? Every diet and exercise system is going to stop working at some point. No matter how great it seems initially, that diet will break. And when it does, your next step is crucial. In this newsletter we’ll be discussing the main strategies to fix a “broken diet” and start eating better. DON’T REALISE YOUR DIET IS BAD In my many years as a dietitian, I came well aware that we humans generally suck at realising what we’re eating. For one, we typically tend to remember the “good things” we do – how we turned down the rusks as they were going round the office last Friday, or how we managed to go a whole week without alcohol. And when we do something “bad” we’re really good at justifying it. “It was so-and-so’s birthday, “or “Yes, I did have that slice of cake, but my friend had 2 slices, so I’m not as bad as her,“  are common reasons I hear for making poor dietary choices. In fact, we’re so bad, that a study from the New England Journal of Medicine found that obese subjects underreported their food intake by an average of 47%, and overestimated the amount of calories burned from exercise by 51%. What does this mean? It means that we think we are eating a lot less than we are, and that we think the exercise we are doing is burning far more calories than it really is. End result – we make little progress and become disheartened with the results. STEP 1: GET TRACKING – KEEP A FOOD DIARY I am a huge fan of food logs. For a start, it gets a person thinking about exactly what they’re eating. Mindless eating is a big problem for many. Writing down everything one eat and drink, over a 2-week period, gets you off to a great start in identifying possible problem areas and underlying nutritional deficiencies. STEP 2: IDENTIFY AND CORRECT NUTRITIONAL DEFICIENCIES Most people think they need a complete diet and exercise make-over. “I have to cut out sugar… and dairy… and carbs… and saturated fat. Plus I have to eat more protein… more healthy fats… and more vegetables. I have to start drinking lots of water too. And exercise… maybe a 6 am boot camp… yeah.” I don’t know about you, but I get exhausted just thinking about changing all this, all at once and often people set themselves up for failure. Let’s call it the “Mission Impossible” approach. Often, people struggle with how they look and feel because their physiology doesn’t work the way it should. This can be hormonal imbalances, but it’s more often dietary deficiency: not getting the right nutrients, in the right amounts, to feel your best and get the best results. Dietary deficiencies are more common than you think A study published in the Journal of the International Society of Sports Nutrition showed that it’s really hard to get all the essential vitamins and minerals from food alone. Of the individual diets that were studied – every single diet was deficient in at least three nutrients. Some diets were missing up to fifteen nutrients! The most common deficiencies included vitamin D, zinc, calcium and some of the B-vitamins. The most common deficiencies I see at Paarl Dietitians are water (low-level dehydration), vitamins and minerals, protein (particularly in women and in men with low appetites), essential fats e.g. omega-3 fatty acids (95% of the population is deficient here), vitamin D, iron and B-vitamins. Bottom line: Dietary deficiencies are very common. Chances are you’ve got one, no matter how good you think your diet is. That’s a problem because when you’re deficient in key nutrients, your physiology doesn’t work properly. And when your body doesn’t work as it should, you feel rotten. Energy levels, appetite, strength, endurance, and mood all rely on getting enough of these essential nutrients. When you don’t get them, things break down. Correcting deficiencies Analysing a food log and blood testing can uncover specific nutrient deficiencies that can be corrected by means of dietary adaptations and nutritional supplementation. As soon as we get the nutrients we need, we thrive. Once we’re getting all the essential nutrients necessary for proper functioning we can move on to bigger issues. These include adjusting food amount (what some call calorie intake) and food type (which includes diet composition or the distribution of protein, carbohydrates and fats). STEP 3: DO NOT EXCEED YOUR METABOLIC RATE For our body to function normally, it needs a constant supply of energy and a variety of nutrients. The amount of energy or number of caloriesyour body uses to carry out these basic functions is known as your basal metabolic rate (BMR) — what you might call metabolism. Thus the metabolic rate is the rate at which the body burns calories. So how much should one eat? The problem comes in when energy is taken in excessive amounts. Too much energy and the body will store the excess as fat and you will gain weight. In other words, if your body uses 1500 kcal to maintain weight, you need to take in at least 500 – 1000 kcal less to lose ½ kg – 1kg per week, therefore a 1000 kcal diet plan. Our practice assess metabolic rate and an individual’s eating plan are devised according to the person’s metabolic rate. By knowing your metabolic rate, we are able to provide correct food amounts and portion sizes to ensure long term weight loss. The secret lies in calorie and portion control. Remember the success of weight loss is an individual approach. Don’t count calories, Be Calorie-Conscious Calorie counting can be very exhausting, time-consuming, confusing and incorrect! Plus this approach just doesn’t suit everyone’s’ lifestyle. Being ‘calorie-conscious’ is a much better approach. The term ‘calorie-conscious’ is a great one, and can often be a real eye-opener. I like to go over an individual’s food diary and pick

The Headache Clinic

No more headaches about exams

Examinations are stressful enough for learners and students, without them having to worry about headaches and migraines. Unfortunately it has become an ordinary occurrence for students and many of them feel helpless when dealing with this problem. They can feel so overwhelmed that they completely forget about the effects this is having on their health. Dr Elliot Shevel, South Africa’s pioneer in the field of migraine surgery and the medical director of The Headache Clinic, says headaches and migraines can have adverse effects on the performance of students and suggests the following measures: Be aware of your posture when studying as this can result in a tension headache. Use a good chair that supports your back and that gives the ideal posture. Visit www.headacheclinic.co.za to get a free copy of the Ideal Computer Posture. Learn the right stretching exercises to stretch the muscles of your head, face, neck and jaw. Finding out what triggers your headaches by keeping a diary. Each time you suffer from a headache, make a note about the warning signs, triggers and severity. If you can discover some of your personal triggers, you may be able to avoid future headaches. This diary is important as it will give your medical professional an accurate history of your headaches. Dietary migraine is a common affliction. These are usually triggered by foods that assist with energy such as chocolate. Chocolate raises the blood sugar levels quickly and then allows it to drop quickly again. Low GI (Glycaemic Index) foods give a more even blood sugar level. Use the nutritional facts label to help choose healthy foods when shopping. A dietary trigger diary is available on www.headacheclinic.co.za under “Free Assistance”. Beware of Medication-Overuse Headache (MOH). Medication is only appropriate for someone who suffers a few times a month. According to the International Headache Society, if you are taking medication more than twice a week you are at risk of developing MOH. This means that the drugs you are taking will cause the migraine to become more severe and more frequent over time. Dehydration is a common trigger, adequate intake of fluid throughout the day to prevent headaches. The human brain is more than 75% water, and it is very sensitive to the amount of water available to it. When the brain detects that the water supply is too low, it begins to produce histamines. “If the problem persists, it is imperative that you get an accurate diagnosis” says Shevel. “There are a number of treatment options that can be investigated. The longer the headache persists, the more damage will be done. One must get to the bottom of the problem and resolve the pain permanently.”

Parenting Hub

How to get consent for your child to move to overseas with you

What do you do when you want to move overseas and your ex doesn’t want to give permission for your child to go with you? This is exactly what happened to Sunette* “My ex and I have a terrible relationship. It was a terrible time in my life. As a father, he has not been very involved.” When her new husband received a great job opportunity in Australia, she was torn. “I thought, he’s never going to let us go. He will just make it as difficult as possible.” There’s a common misconception that if you’re not married to your child’s other biological parent, then you can’t leave South Africa. Not so, according to migration lawyer David Dadic. “The misconception generally stems from the requirement of most governments that in order for one parent to emigrate, he or she requires the other biological parent’s consent to the emigration. Often, and because of, the fractured relationship between the parents, the remaining parent is uninclined to give the necessary consent (even when the emigration is unquestionably in the best interest of the child), leaving the migrating parent with a severe sense of frustration and hopelessness.” Fortunately, the common misconception is just that, and the migrating parent does in fact have several options available to him or her to facilitate their migration with their child, should the remaining parent resist giving the necessary consent. Court Order  The most common recourse in situations such as this is for the migrating parent to make an application to court seeking a court order that he or she have the sole decision-making role as to the child’s migration, thereby disposing of the need for the consent. These applications can be quite cumbersome, particularly when there is much acrimonious history between the biological parents. Additionally, the motivation that the child’s best interest is being best served by leaving South Africa, and then growing up in Australia away from the remaining parent, needs to be very well evaluated. So, considering that success of this application may ultimately affect your entire migration it’s sensible to instruct lawyers who are well versed in such applications. However, all is not lost. “Recently, there have been many cases where the migrating parents have successfully obtained the court orders necessary to either force the remaining parent to consent to the emigration or disposing of the consents altogether,” says David. Fundamentally the court must decide what’s in the best interest of the child – either to stay or go – but it’s these recent cases that have largely turned the tide in favour of the migrating parent. Agreement Most split parents will know that the practical administering of a child’s care is ultimately decided between the parents by an agreement. Even after many months or years of ugly litigation they are eventually able to come together and through a formal agreement decide on things such as maintenance, contact, schooling etc. Parents will also know that, because the agreement is usually made an order of court, should one of the parents breach their obligations that parent then becomes susceptible to further court orders (and related legal costs) forcing their compliance. In the way that general child care issues are agreed to between the parents so can any issues regarding emigration. The parents can regulate, and agree on, how often the child will telephone or Skype call the remaining parent, how often and for what duration the child will come back to see the remaining parent or in fact that parent coming to visit the child. This agreement can also, as with those ordinarily done between parents, be made an order of the South African court. For Suzette, the road ahead is a long one. “My ex won’t give us consent, so now we are turning to the courts to let us go. I have a great lawyer that’s helping us. The frustrating thing is that my husband had to go to take the job, so we are here on our own while we wait.” So, if you’re finding yourself in the predicament where you have the opportunity to raise your child or children overseas, but are having issues in getting their biological parent to agree, don’t feel disheartened and give up on your dreams, you are most certainly not without options.  “But be aware that because the mirroring of the court orders from South Africa can be somewhat complex it’s best to instruct as lawyer who has experience in local and international law,” concludes David. *Name changed to protect identity  About Pathway Lawyers and Migration Agents  Headed up by practice principal David Dadic (MARN 1785371), a vastly experienced multi-jurisdictional lawyer, Pathway’s lawyers are qualified and experienced in the South African and Australian legal systems, and also registered with MARA. Our capable and reliable team of migration consultants can assist you with all matters related to your migration to Australia, whether legal or personal, whether in Australia or in South Africa. We are also able to offer advice on business investor visas. For this reason, only Pathway can offer you truly tailored and unrivalled bespoke legal and migration services that best fits your personal circumstances

Parenting Hub

5 Things New Parents Can do to Increase Infant Attachment

Attachment is the process through which infants bond with their caregivers. This usually means Mom, Dad, and if there is another caregiver in the picture nanny or early education professional. Building this relationship is about establishing trust, safety, a sense of comfort and connection.  Men and women bond differently to their babies but both kinds of bonding are valid and necessary. Men bond through face to face interaction. Holding the baby and gazing into their faces. I can do this for hours. Studies also show men never pick up their infant the same way twice, this adds a variety in the interaction and give infants a sense of adventure and knowing the world can be unpredictable. While, moms also gaze into baby’s face, they also tend to talk to baby and cuddle more. Holding the infant close to the body and nurturing them. The important thing is a child is bonding with both parents. There are five things parents can do to purposely bond with their child. Hold them as much as possible during the first year. Meet the need they are crying about quickly. Talk, read, and interact with them consistently. Eliminate all screen-time before age 3. Spend time together as a family. 1. Hold them as much as possible during the first year Hold them as much as possible the first year. There is an old piece of advice which says if you hold a child too much they will expect it, so it is best not to hold them too much. However, the research supports holding infants is the best way to develop an emotional, physical, and life long bond. Touch is very important to infants. The discovery was made as researcherswanted to know why some orphanages has an infant mortality rate of 30+% and also a failure to thrive rate as well. The answer was not enough touch. I am not saying you should never put your child down. You have a life to live and they need sometime to just be. But, do not hinder yourself from holding them you will not spoil them by holding them too much. In fact the opposite is true. Holding your child and helping them develop a secure attachment is what gives them the security and confidence to explore the world when they are developmentally ready to do so. 2. Meet their needs as quickly as possible Children are new to the world and we teach them about the world by how we treat them and what we do for them. A child whose needs are met quickly develop a sense of trust and reliability on their parents and the world. Are you always going to be able to meet their needs now!  No, and I do not expect you to and you should not expect that of yourself . However, meeting the need as soon as humanly possible is a key component of developing a secure bond between you and your child. Keep in mind sometimes meeting the need is tolet them cry. If you want your baby to be able to put themselves to sleep; an important part of that process is to allow them to cry themselves into an exhausted sleep. Is that easy. NO! Is it necessary? It depends do you want to rock them to sleep forever? 3. Talk, read, and interact with them consistently Human beings are social creatures and need interaction with others. You need to be this connection for your infant. So, talk to them you can just speak. Pretend they can understand everything you say and just talk. The more you talk the them the sooner they will begin to understand and the sooner they will talk back to you. I have one friend who is a complete chatter box. Her son was speaking in complete sentences by age 3. Hold them and read stories. There is so much connection in holding a book and your young child and reading and holding the book. Interact,move them around and build arm and leg strength by letting them hold onto your finger and pull, or by gently bending their legs and letting them brace their feet on your hands and push on your hands. Play peek-a-boo, blow raspberries on their necks and tummies, take something bright and colorful and let them follow it with their eyes as you wave it in the air. Just love them and play with them. It is this activity which build love, connection, trust, and attachment. 4. Eliminate all screen time before age 3 The research is ever growing that brain development and screen time are mutually exclusive. Young children need and crave the complexity of human interaction. Screen time numbs their brain activity and eliminate the brains ability to make complex neuroconnections needed in later life. I am no expert on this but a site I follow has a blog by someone who has the pulse on this issue; I suggest you read it! The long and the short of it for this post is that screen time can literally cause brain damage in young children! 5. Spend time together as a family Bonding among the rest of the family and the baby is most cemented by spending time together as a family. As much as possible include the infant in the activities the family enjoyed be for the birth. If the family enjoyed camping before then camping after may have to include a trailer or RBV to ensure the baby has all of their needs met. You may have to think outside of the box in order to accomplish this however, family life should not stop because there is now a baby. Instead find a way to incorporate the baby’s needs and continue on with living. It is a mistake to make the family’s life surround the baby. These five points will help you to build bonds with your infant and strengthen bonds with each member of the family. I hope you enjoy this time! Believe in Parenting

Toptots Head Office

Why is a baby’s sense of touch so important?

The tactile system (or sense of touch) is one of the earliest to develop, and is also the largest sensory system. It comprises various receptors which allow us to feel light touch, deep pressure, texture, pain, and temperature. Its main function early in life is a protective one – allowing infants to feel pain or discomfort, for example, a wet nappy. It also guides them in feeding, as they use their sense of touch to locate the nipple for milk. The ability to process touch sensation within the mouth aids with sucking and later, with chewing and swallowing solid food. Since our tactile system develops so early on, before the visual and auditory systems are well-developed, touch is the way in which babies initially make sense of the world around them. This starts with putting everything in their mouths in order to understand the properties of the objects e.g. size, shape and texture. Later on their hands begin to process tactile input in a more mature manner and from this they start to develop gross and fine motor skills. The relationship between touch and bonding and emotional development in early life is also a significant one. It is essential for an infant to have physical closeness with his mother or caregiver so that he learns to form a primary attachment. Bonding also gives an infant his first feelings of himself as a physical body, and later allows him to develop his body scheme (awareness of his physical boundaries). This “boundary” that the skin provides, helps him to feel secure in the world around him. Stages of development: The tactile system starts to develop in the uterus and functions well from birth. 1 month: Touch sensations are important as a source of emotional satisfaction, for feeding and for reflexes e.g. when you touch your baby’s cheek he will respond by turning his head. 3 months: Starting to reach for objects and holding on as part of the automatic grasp reflex and as a reaction to the sensation of touch in the palm of his hand. 4 – 6 months: Starting to touch and look at hands and starting to use the thumb and fore-finger. [Concerns should be raised if your child is not yet grasping items, touching his hands and bringing toys together with his two hands]. 6 months – 2 years: Starting to develop more accuracy in reaching and grasping by using the hands and eyes together. 2 years: Improved ability to tell where touch occurred on the body and thus direct responses more voluntarily. [Concerns should be raised if your child is fumbling, dropping items regularly, and having difficulty playing with toys and learning new skills.] 3 – 7 years: Starting to use simple tools like paper, crayons, scissors, zips and buckles and developing accuracy and control with them. [Concerns should be raised if your child is battling with learning skills like doing buttons and zips, tying shoelaces, using eating utensils.

Parenting Hub

Some games are good for cognitive development – experts say

Certain toys and games play an integral part in a child’s cognitive development and one of the best ways to nurture a young brain is through play – it challenges thinking and the ability to process information. The body as an “architect of the brain” Parenting expert Nikki Bush explains that the body is an “architect of the brain” during childhood and in order to best understand the world around them, children need to be exposed to a range of scenarios to ensure the brain remains stimulated. She says that school, home and the outdoor environments are important; and so are toys and games with educational value, like Lego, and arts and crafts.  Engaging in conversation with both adults and children is also a “big advantage” and encourages interaction and open communication. Different stages; different needs “Children go through different stages of development that all play a role in their ultimate cognitive development. Different environments, different people and different toys with value help to stimulate the young mind and assists children to interpret new information accurately,” Bush says. And a young brain learns easily, she explains that during childhood the brain is “extremely plastic and elastic” and with the result, learning is much easier for young children than older people. “Ever hear the saying that a child’s brain is like a sponge? That’s because it’s 100 percent correct, much learning happens when they’re young as they’re able to absorb information and understand things quite easily,” she says. Phases of learning: Concrete Semi-concrete Abstract   The concrete learning phase is most important, Bush says no images on screens or in a book can substitute the real thing, “real trumps everything in early learning”. The Child Development Team at Toy Kingdom South Africa says stocking toys that are good for cognitive development is high on its priority list. The range of Hape products, along with Lego are just few developmental toys on the store’s shelves. “Children thrive on three-dimensional learning. And the concrete phase allows a child to interact with a real object with their bodies. They are able to feel that an apple is round, see its colour, taste and smell it,” she says. Bush says children should be able to internalise and experience with their bodies for an ultimate memorable learning experience.

Mia Von Scha

The unwrapped gift of the gifted child

When we think of gifted children the first name that springs to mind is usually Einstein. I can’t help but wonder how many therapies Einstein would have been in if he had been born today. Rumour has it that he only started speaking at age 3, so already we have delayed development, paeds and speech therapy. Some have said that he would have been diagnosed today with autism or aspergers and would probably end up in special ed. He was known for long periods of daydreaming, something we treat these days with ADHD meds. Would we even pick up the underlying genius at all? I doubt it. Most gifted kids end up like an unwrapped gift – they are a group of the most unrecognized and misdiagnosed children around today. They are some of the children most often found in a variety of therapies because they don’t fit in the normal schooling mould and we don’t know what to do with them. They often have inconsistent developmental rates where they’re very advanced in one area and quite behind in another and so we surmise that they can’t be gifted if they’re not coping or at a similar level as other kids their age. Gifted kids tend to have one or more over-excitabilities including physical (misdiagnosed as ADHD and put on meds), sensory (misdiagnosed as sensory integration issues and sent to OT), emotional (misdiagnosed as emotional problems and sent to play therapy). It is up to us as parents to inform ourselves and trust our instincts when it comes to our children. Just because some professional tells you your child has a problem does not necessarily mean it is true. Get another opinion. Do some research. Dig a little deeper. Gifted kids may even need some therapy and may even have a learning disability that comes alongside their genius but often they are simply misdiagnosed in our modern day obsession with fixing children and making them all alike. If you suspect your child is gifted, they probably are. Here are the typical traits of a gifted child (keep in mind that gifted children, like all children, are unique and may or may not display all of these traits): Unusual alertness, even in infancy Rapid learner Excellent memory Unusually large vocabulary and complex sentence structure for their age Advanced comprehension of word nuances, metaphors and abstract ideas Enjoys solving problems, especially with numbers and puzzles Often self-taught reading and writing skills as preschooler Deep, intense feelings and reactions Highly sensitive Thinking is abstract, complex, logical, and insightful Idealism and sense of justice at early age Concern with social and political issues and injustices Preoccupied with own thoughts—daydreamer Learn basic skills quickly and with little practice Asks probing questions Wide range of interests (or extreme focus in one area) Highly developed curiosity Interest in experimenting and doing things differently Puts idea or things together that are not typical Keen and/or unusual sense of humour Desire to organize people/things Vivid imaginations (and imaginary playmates when in preschool) Parents are actually very good at judging whether their child is gifted or not, so trust yourself. Gifted kids, like special needs children, have different requirements in terms of education, stimulation, and emotional support. The sooner you unwrap your gift, the sooner you can figure out exactly how to nurture your unique child into fulfilling their potential.

Parenting Hub

HOW CAN PARENTS FACILITATE BABY’S MOVEMENT AND GROWTH?

The first year of life is a time when babies strengthen their muscles and bones. They learn how to use their bodies to move around and to manipulate their environment. If babies are constantly held and carried during the first year, they will lose valuable opportunities to gain fine-tune skills. Parents and caregivers should facilitate movement and growth by giving babies safe environments to play in and allow their little ones to explore these areas on their own. Lesego Mashishi-Matlala, Huggies® expert in occupational therapy sheds some light on assistive devices for baby’s motor development. Each stage of motor development offers a new dimension of exploration and propels baby to the next stage of motor development. The natural progression of gross motor developmental phase is neck control, rolling, sitting, standing with support, standing without support and from 12 to 18 months, walking independently. What can parents do to facilitate this development? It is important to ensure that your little ones’ environment offers stimulation of all senses and encourages exploration. You may ask, is it then a bad thing to introduce toy mobility aids or assistive devices such as a supported baby chair to help baby achieve their developmental phase of walking? The answer would be, that it is important to strike a balance and to introduce these devices at the correct time. It is important for parents to allow babies to naturally lead their way through their motor developmental phases. In so doing, you are allowing brain development, language development, and baby’s spatial awareness to develop naturally. This helps baby to learn how to interact with their environment to get their desired outcome through movement. A lot of brain development and information processing occurs between the development phase of sitting and walking. This is when baby starts to learn to crawl and pull themselves up into a standing position. During this transition, there are more benefits in allowing baby to master their movements on their own rather than introducing assistive devices or toys. First, you need to allow baby to develop adequate upper body control, and to achieve some controlled body movements. Do not deprive your baby of opportunities for self-initiated or self-produced mobility. Assistive devices such as sitting aids and walkers should be introduced once baby has shown the initiative and attempted to get into the desired motor position. This ensures that the baby has processed information and is working out bilateral symmetry, crossing of the midline and is mastering controlled purposeful movements, which will ultimately be followed by the alternating coordinated movements that are needed for walking and running. What is imperative during this stage is to ensure babies level of comfort. A comfortable baby is a moving baby. By giving your little ones, the support and confidence needed to develop and explore the world around them you are allowing their movement to naturally progress and develop.

Parenting Hub

Undescended testes in premature babies common, but treatable

Undescended testes affects almost four percent of all new-born males, is more common in premature infants and poses a high risk of cancer, a Urology Hospital, Pretoria, specialist has warned. The condition – also known as cryptorchidism, in which one or both testes do not lie in the scrotum – is, however, treatable through corrective surgery. Urologist Dr Craig Mamitele explains that if, in the foetus stage, testes do not descend down to the scrotum getting stuck along the path of descent this development is described as undescended testes. The condition occurs in about 30% of premature babies and in most cases testes will descend after birth. “If one or both testes has not descended within the first year, this will need to be treated,” said Mamitele adding that while hormone injections may be recommended in some cases, surgery is often advised. “Treatment is successful in the vast majority of cases and should take place as early in the child’s life as possible – preferably within the first year. It is safe and performed under general anaesthesia. “An undescended testicle only discovered later in life,” Mamitele warned, “may need to be removed as it is not likely to function well and may pose a cancer risk.” He therefore stressed the importance of doctors checking the testes in new born babies, especially premature babies – something parents can also do. “Early detection is vital and doctors should immediately refer cases to a urologist for accurate diagnosis and correction. The Urology Hospital specialises in the treatment of urological conditions such as undescended testes and is therefore well placed to address all queries in this regard.” Contact The Urology Hospital, Pretoria on 012 423 4000 or email [email protected].

Impaq

Collaborative Learning

by Prof Rita Niemann Gerlach (2004) explained that collaborative learning is in essence a natural social act, implying talking about and discussing topics, which results in learning. In applying collaborative learning in terms of an educational approach, it means learners working together to solve problems or challenges in order to complete a task. How can collaborative learning contribute to the learning process? Collaborative learning can contribute to the learning process if the following elements are catered for: Some tips for effective collaborative learning Constituting the group Ideal size: 4-5 learners. Set up the groups prior to assigning the tasks. Place groups in a way to optimise collaboration (e.g. around a table). Assigning the task Plan meticulously (e.g. the purpose, handouts, resources, etc.). Use real-world problems to stimulate problem-solving and critical thinking skills. Link emerging ideas to the purpose and objectives of the tasks. Allow sufficient time. Align tasks to the learners’ experiences, access to resources, skills, etc. Present task in a visible manner. Group member interaction Allow for questions, if learners are not clear about what is expected from them. Insist on proper behaviour. Set ground rules for how groups have to operate. Account for the diversity in and between groups, Assign roles to the members of the group or allow the groups to assign their own roles. Determine whether the team members have the required resources or allow for sharing resources. A group name or logo builds group cohesion. Allow for ample communication between members. Allow learners to conduct research/explore options to solve a challenge/conduct an activity. Allow for applying their own ideas. Facilitator’s role Have incentives/rewards to excite members to accomplish their goals. Include an element of competition. Monitor the groups’ progress, but do not interfere with their work. Let groups give feedback (orally or in a written form). Give constructive feedback on what worked well and where learners were on the right track and make suggestions for improvement. Allow learners to reflect on their group experiences. Discuss/present the outcome/s to get critique. Support learners who fall behind. The usage of technology should be considered (e.g. chats).

Advtech Group

Early School Years Crucial for Cultivating Emotional Intelligence in a Child

Of the twelve years that children spend at school, the foundation phase – years one through four – are the most critical for cementing the long-term potential of children and enabling them to become successful adults, an education expert says. “It goes without saying that academic excellence is important, but developing children’s emotional intelligence may literally make the difference between success and failure in their lives,” says Chris Van Niekerk, head at Founders Hill College, part of Africa’s largest private education provider, ADvTECH. He says that when undertaking the important task of investigating schooling options, parents and guardians should consider more than the academic or sporting achievements and track record of a school, and also enquire about a school’s approach to instilling vital life skills. “Nurturing emotional intelligence should be considered as important as teaching children to read, write and do arithmetic – if not more – and schools, parents and communities have a duty to ensure this fundamental life skill is not left by the wayside,” he says. Van Niekerk says the younger the age at which children acquire these insights and skills, the better. “It’s in years one to four that children learn to love learning; learn about a world that challenges and rewards; and learn what makes them who they are: unique human beings who hold a wealth of potential and who can do anything they put their hearts and minds into. “It is during these years that these skills become part of the child’s character and personality: guiding their decisions, helping them make sense of the world, and being the foundation of their relationships with others. Starting with five-year-olds is the best place to start.” Emotional intelligence can be described as a set of softer skills that help children grow up to become “likeable”, successful human beings who can accept that not everybody in the world is going to be like you, agree with you or think like you. More than this, it’s understanding that this diversity is not only good and desirable, but to be celebrated and embraced. “It’s learning how to give and take: to compromise and to negotiate. It’s learning to relate to others: to empathise and communicate your own feelings in a situation. It’s learning to listen to what other people say, and how to speak your own mind. It’s acquiring the skills and the confidence to articulate your feelings and ideas, and it’s learning to identify what it is, exactly, that makes you respond the way you do to people and situations around you. Critically, it’s learning how to manage those feelings, instead of letting them manage you.” Van Niekerk says that emotional intelligence skills aren’t ones that can be taught in lesson slots on the timetable. Instead, they should form part of all interactions, whether they be during academic, social or physical activities. Additionally, provision should be made for assisting children who show signs of needing early intervention to reach emotional intelligence milestones. “Success cannot only be measured academically and professionally. It is measured by the quality of our relationships, and by our ability to lead meaningful, effective lives,” he says.

Parenting Hub

Prima Toys Baby Introduces Little Tikes Baby

“Developmental Toys” is the latest buzz-word in terms of parenting – and for good reason. Prima Baby is proud to announce a brand new range of baby toys – Little Tikes, who is making products for the littlest ones in your household with the newest range, Little Tikes Baby. We know moms are hyper-focused on their child’s development from week to week, but we also know that it can be incredibly difficult to find toys that can actually aid in developmental play. Each “Designed to Develop” product helps baby achieve a primary developmental milestone.  Little Tikes Baby has partnered closely with child development experts to ensure each product delivers on its promise. There are three different segments within the line — soothe, stimulate, and strengthen — each honing in on what is most important to moms and babies in the first six months: The ‘soothe’ segment features products designed to help calm and nurture baby. The ‘stimulate’ segment highlights items designed to awaken baby’s senses through sight, touch, and sound. The ‘strengthen’ segment is all about products designed to build baby’s strength during tummy time. Nothing can replace quality playtime with your baby.  We’re proud that Little Tikes Baby products can be a helpful part of those special moments! All products are available at Hamleys Baby Divisions (Eastgate, Sandton, Menlyn, Mall Of Africa, V&A Waterfront and Greenstone.), Selected Kids Emporium stores, www.takealot.com, www.loot.co.za, www.netbaby.co.za, www.simplicity.co.za, www.thebabyzone.co.za, www.netbaby.co.za 

Parenting Hub

Your child is sick, and you feel guilty. Why?

There is nothing worse than when your child is sick. As a parent, you feel the need to do everything in your power to take care of your child. “But, the truth is, although you can do everything in your power to try and prevent your child from getting sick, or getting hurt, these things happen,” says Carla Yssel, brand manager for Linctagon®, “and mommy guilt is a real thing.” We don’t account for the guilt that a parent feels when their child is sick. “Mommy guilt, and daddy guilt are real emotions that almost all parents feel – it’s the feeling that you haven’t done enough to protect your child from anything and everything,” says Yssel. Yssel says parents need to give themselves a break and she gives them following advice: At night instead of looking at all the things that went wrong during the day, congratulate yourself on the things that you did right. This will enable you to see that you did succeed during the day and not everything is as bad as it may seem. Give yourself a break. Remove yourself from the guilt for a little bit – go for a cup of coffee, meet a friend for dinner – remember who you are as a person and not only as a parent. This will give you a break, and when you return you will be able to focus more on your children. Be prepared (as much as you can be). When it comes to children things can tend to go a different direction than expected, and you need to have the basics covered in case they do. Keeping a stocked first aid kit including band aids, and antiseptic ointment are a must. Children get sick – deal with it. Your child is not sick because you have to work, or because you gave them fish fingers one night for dinner instead of vegetables. Your child is sick because that is what happens. Linctagon® boasts a full range of medicines to help deal with any aspect of the common cold or flu, and Linctagon® Effervescent Junior can help children get over colds quicker than usual. It contains the active ingredient Pelargonium sidoidesand through its active support can shorten the duration of the common cold as well as reduce the severity of symptoms. It also contains added vitamins A and C, anti-inflammatory MSM and immunity enhancer Zinc.

Parenting Hub

Breastfeeding can help prevent both breast cancer and childhood cancer

One in every 20 women in Southern Africa will develop breast cancer at some point in their lives.* As we observe Breast Cancer Awareness Month in October, the South African Breastmilk Reserve (SABR) urges women to take action to reduce their risk of developing breast cancer. “Many women understand the basics of breast cancer prevention, for example getting enough exercise, maintaining a healthy weight, and eating properly,” says Professor Suzanne Delport, breastfeeding activist and Medical Director of the South African Breastmilk Reserve (SABR). “Few realise that breastfeeding your child for at least a year significantly lowers the chance of contracting breast cancer later in life,” she continues. While breastfeeding, the mother and infant are benefited simultaneously. Breastfeeding also improves long term outcomes for both mother and infant long after cessation, particularly outcomes related to cancer. A long period, six to twelve months, of breastfeeding: Decreases the risk of invasive breast cancer by 7%. This percentage translates into the annual prevention of 20 000 breast cancer deaths globally. Decreases the risk of ovarian cancer by 18%. Has long term beneficial effects on the health, nutrition, and the intellectual development of a child. Greatly reduces the risks of obesity and both type 1 and 2 diabetes in a child.**** Clinical studies have proven that producing breast milk tends to inhibit cells from “misbehaving” and becoming cancerous. Many women have fewer menstrual cycles while breastfeeding, which in turn lowers their oestrogen levels, which are a major cause of breast cancer. Women also tend to lead healthier lives while breastfeeding, and will often stop smoking and drinking alcohol while they are nursing.** Breastfeeding also reduces the chances of your child developing childhood cancers. A recent study found that babies who were breastfed for at least six months appeared to have a 19% lower risk of childhood leukaemia compared to children who were never breastfed or were breastfed for a shorter period.*** “Of course, breastfeeding is just one factor in combatting breast cancer. Women should take as many precautions as possible to reduce their risk,” says Delport. “It’s vital that every woman in South Africa learns how to conduct breast exams on themselves and commit to having regular mammograms. Smoking is also a huge contributor, and quitting this habit can reduce your risk of all cancers enormously,” she continues. Some women develop breast cancer before they have children, or even while they have a young child of breastfeeding age. “A breast cancer diagnosis doesn’t necessarily mean that you won’t be able to breastfeed,” says Delport. “Many breast cancer survivors go on to successfully nurse their infants. It’s important to explore all the options with your doctor, and not to give up hope,” she continues. “Human milk banks exist, in part, to help those mothers who are unable to breastfeed at all,” explains Delport. “So even if you’ve had a double mastectomy, you’ll still be able to feed your child with nature’s perfect baby food,” she concludes. To get involved and alleviate the challenges faced by the South African Breastmilk Reserve (SABR), including the low breastfeeding rates in South Africa, sourcing donor mothers, and funding for the operation of the milk banks, please visit www.sabr.org.za or call 011 482 1920 or e-mail: [email protected].

Parenting Hub

Drink Rooibos Tea to Improve Concentration During Exams

Coffee and energy drinks are usually the go-to beverages for high school learners and students to help them cram for finals during the stressful months of October and November, but science suggests they drink rooibos tea as an alternative to help them stay on top of their “A” game. Several studies point to rooibos tea’s ability to protect healthy cells from damage caused by free radicals and that its high level of antioxidants could reduce the effects of oxidative stress, which learners and students typically experience in the lead up to and during end-of-year exams. Adele du Toit, spokesperson for the SA Rooibos Council explains that the brain appears to be especially susceptible to excessive oxidative stress, because of its high demand for oxygen. “Dietary antioxidants, like the polyphenolic compounds found in rooibos, have been shown to protect neurons against a variety of neurodegenerative conditions. Reactive oxygen species (ROS) or more commonly referred to as ‘free radicals caused’ by poor nutrition, cigarette smoke, excessive alcohol intake, pollution, among other factors, are harmful elements that trigger oxidation (disruption of a living cell) in the body and brain. The stress hormone, cortisol, which is elevated during exam time, increases inflammation, and further intensifies free radical production. “When these free radicals cause oxidation in the body, they damage the healthy cells which could hinder one’s ability to learn and retain information. Rooibos counters this impact by reducing the effect of oxidative by-products in neural pathways thereby stimulating concentration and focus. “Unlike coffee, which could give you the jitters followed by a crash, rooibos tea is a cleaner-burning and longer-lasting fuel for the body since it doesn’t contain any caffeine or tannin. An added bonus is that it also relieves tension and headaches,” she remarks. While consuming small amounts of caffeine daily is not harmful, drinking too much, such as during exam time, could prove dangerous and lead to a physical dependence since it is highly addictive. The temporary boost of energy it gives you, may also keep you awake for longer than is needed, which could lead to unwanted fatigue on exam day. Du Toit recommends six cups of rooibos tea a day for optimal replenishing of critical antioxidants. “Rooibos tea has no side-effects and contains some of the strongest and most unique antioxidants in the plant kingdom, including aspalathin and nothofagin. Students should make the most of this natural energy drink, which is tasty, affordable and can be enjoyed hot or cold.” Here’s a few fun twists on rooibos tea to get you through your finals: Basic rooibos iced tea: One litre of Rooibos tea using four to six teabags Sweeten the tea with honey to taste and leave it in the fridge to cool overnight Experiment with this basic iced tea, by adding mint, lemon, orange, granadilla, mango or apple, or a combination of flavours until you find one that you love. Juiced or squeezed fresh fruit usually delivers the best results, but you can also use honey and preservative-free fruit juice. Mixing it with cold rooibos will make it go further and keeping a jug of it in the fridge should mean you don’t have to keep buying juice. Rooibos can be kept in the fridge for up to two weeks without spoiling. Rooibos and berry iced tea: 8 rooibos tea bags or flavoured rooibos of your choice 1 cinnamon stick 4 whole cloves 6 thin slices ginger 4 cups (1 litre) boiling water 4 cups (1 litre) 100% berry juice, chilled Lemon juice to taste Place tea bags, spices and ginger in a large glass jug and pour over boiling water. Stir well and allow to cool for about two hours. Remove tea bags, ginger and spices. Add berry juice to the tea and season with lemon juice to taste. Enjoy cold with ice and mint leaves, fruit and lemon. Rooibos ice-lollies: By pouring some Rooibos iced tea into popsicle containers or ice-cube trays and freezing it, you can also enjoy it as a refreshing treat when you get the munchies while you’re studying. For more info about the health benefits of rooibos, visit www.sarooibos.co.za

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