Does your child suffer from low self-esteem?

When a child suffers from low self-esteem, it will almost always carry on into their adulthood if not addressed. Simple things such as meeting new people can be very difficult, as well as taking on challenges, valuing their own opinion and much more.

It is so important for parents to understand just how crucial healthy self-esteem in a child can be because they have a crucial role to play in the development of their children’s sense of self-worth.

If your child has a low self-esteem, parent intervention can prevent the following being carried through to adulthood.

Poor communication skills: A child with low-esteem is likely to grow into an adult that has difficulty in communicating with others; whether it is with their spouse, coworkers or peers, as they often do not feel secure and confident with what they say and may be afraid to express themselves.

Negative thoughts and feelings: Since a child with low self-worth will regularly have negative thoughts and feelings about themselves and even others, it will likely carry through into adulthood. Unfortunately, the difference in adulthood will be that they are more likely to keep their feelings internalised rather than expressing them.

Hot temper: An adult with low self-esteem may have a hot temper. This is usually because of the frustration and constantly simmering negative thoughts that they experience. These bubble below the surface and spill over fairly readily when provoked.

Blaming others: Instead of taking responsibility for things going wrong, they are often quick to blame others. This avoidance of responsibility takes blame from them and puts it onto others. For a while, they are able to feel buoyed up and justified.

Difficulty with relationships: Relationship difficulty is common when your child takes their low self-worth into adulthood. It is hard to truly love and dedicated yourself to another when you don’t truly love yourself. What they end up giving to their partners is a less than whole self, often putting strain on the relationship.

Keep in mind that while some of these signs may or may not carry through into adulthood, everyone is impacted differently. A child who has a low self-esteem won’t always be an adult with low self-esteem. Self-esteem is not a black-and-white-all-or-nothing matter. There are varying degrees of self-esteem or self-worth. A child can have very low self-esteem or just a little self-doubt which will impact how they transform into adults.

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Doug Berry

Neurofeedback Practitioner, Professional Registered Counsellor, Co- founder, facilitator and partner of the EQ Advantedge Course. Doug has a wide and varied field of experience, from trauma centres to working with survivors of brain injury, but has a great love for working with the youth of South Africa, to help them develop the coping skills they need to navigate an ever more changing and challenging future.

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