Advice from the experts
Parenting Hub

The conversations we need to be having with our school-leavers

The face of parenting changes year by year, as our children grow and develop their own personalities, interests and expectations of life! Cindy Glass, Director and Co-founder of Step Up Education Centres elaborates by explaining “We have been there from the new-born phase – supporting, encouraging, nurturing and guiding them as best we can – in a world that is rapidly changing and in communities that have challenges all of their own. Many parents are entering yet another phase of their children’s development – the excited, anxious, energised, slightly stressed school-leaver! Life, as we know it, can be a cruel adventure!”  So what conversations should we be having with our children as they prepare to face life as ‘new-born’ adults?  You can only give to others how you feel about yourself. Negative behavioural choices are rooted in fear and a lack of self confidence and self-esteem! Self-awareness and self-respect are key elements in ensuring that you treat others as you wish to be treated! Honour yourself and never stop trying to be the very best version of who you are! Mistakes and failures are inevitable! USE these experiences as learning opportunities to grow in confidence and skill! OWN your mistakes and look for ways to find positive solutions!  Choices have a buddy called Consequences! Life is about making choices-every second of every day and facing the consequences of those choices. Don’t blame others for the choices that you have made! Seek to learn from negative choices and use the opportunity to find ways to lift yourself up again. As you learn to honour and respect yourself, aim to pour this into the world. Use every opportunity to be kind to others-remembering that we are all on this earth to learn and grow. Kindness, gentleness and friendliness don’t cost a cent, but they have immeasurable value! It is ok to say NO!  You do not have to get involved in anything that does not feel right and good to you. Protect your energy and happiness by saying no to circumstances and pressures that do not add value to your life! Again, saying no in a respectful manner costs nothing.  It will show others the strength of character that you have and that is valuable! Think big! Be determined! Be courageous! BUT, allow yourself to be vulnerable and human as well.   You may feel sad, angry, despondent, frustrated or lonely from time to time. That is ok.  Just do not let these moments define who you are! Feel them, own them and then rise again!  Cindy concludes up by saying “Life is a woven tapestry of experiences, adventures, hurts and joys! Embrace every opportunity and choose to LIVE the best life possible, no matter what challenges may come your way! Happiness comes from within and there IS a solution for every challenge!” 

Parenting Hub

Connecting with your teenager

As a mother of four teenagers, it would be plausible for me to hail myself as all knowledgeable on the topic of connecting with teenagers.  Unfortunately, connecting with your child is not a science – it requires continuous enthusiasm and effort.  The same enthusiasm and effort that was shown to them when they were infants, toddlers and tweenies.  Unlike other stages of your child’s development, the daunting part of connecting with a teenager is respecting that they have opinions and ideologies of their own, which are occasionally in conflict with your own. I asked my children about their views on the way we connect.  For the first time in recent history they agreed with one another.   We connect through mutual respect and compromise, two principles that can only be attained by communication. As a family we have established a variety of rituals that began in their early childhood.  These have aided communication throughout their teenage years.  Like many other mothers in the world, I juggle a career and the responsibilities of single parenting.  The reality of life is that there is not much time for individual, sit-down, deep and meaningful conversations with my children.  We all, however, have to eat and mealtime is communication time.  I insist upon us eating together at a specified time every day – it is a non-negotiable rule in our home that is observed in the morning and in the evening.   Gathering in the morning allows us to communicate our plans for the upcoming day.  This is the time when I focus on the events for that day which are important to my teenagers; we are able to remind each other about what we have to do in the day; and it is often the opportunity to appreciate how much each individual family member has to cope with on that particular day.   Between work, school and sport, all our days are busy and there is little time for each other between sunrise and sunset.  During these hours there is a lot to be positively said for the power of social media.  We have a family Whattsapp group and at some point throughout the day, one of us will send a message or an emoji or a meme.  It takes all of a second, yet it can communicate love, encouragement or most often just share a little bit of family humour.  Should I receive an email during the day that is pertinent to one of my teenagers, I forward it to them directly.  This gives them the opportunity to be accountable for their own commitments and ensures that I don’t forget to pass on important information. Dinner time is when it all comes together.  This is the time when I get the “scoop” of the day, with each teenager adding their little bit of “spice”.  We are by no means the “Brady Bunch”, as dinner time often ends with more than one person disgruntled.  Respect and compromise get their time to shine at this point.  It is the moment when opportunities are taken by the teens to ask for permission (which often requires compromise on both our parts) or to let me know about altercations and celebrations that have happened in the day.  It gives us the chance to debate current topics and to respectfully disagree with each other. I cannot help but dismiss the theory that it is not quantity, but quality that counts when spending time with your children.  It is the daily quantitative communication that affords you the opportunity to discuss and advise teenagers on small issues before they become big challenges.  Of course, connectivity is a relative concept.  I would venture to suggest that finding the connectivity balance is the most challenging part of being a parent to teenagers.  When my husband died seven years ago, I vividly remember one of my first thoughts being along the lines of not wanting my children to feel too connected to me as they became teenagers and thus feeling the need to be responsible for me.  At that point in time I decided that all my children would leave home when going to university.  This year, my first baby left to study in a different province.  It has been the second most difficult time in both our lives and we count the days until we see each other.  As difficult as it is for us both, it is an integral part of cementing our connectivity as adults.  We talk every day, albeit that the time we spend chatting has become shorter as the year has progressed.   The stronger the connection, the more difficult it is to disconnect.  Just as we, as parents, are responsible for making the connection, so we are responsible for encouraging a certain amount of disconnection to take place at the right time. Throughout my teenagers’ latter years, I have noticed a few of their peers’ parents struggle with levels of connectivity.  When our children become teenagers, we also tend to get a second lease on life. We have increased freedom and time – it is tempting to use our connectivity with them as a channel to re-live our own teenage years.  A point of danger.  Whilst the concept of being a “cool” parent is tempting and, I must confess, I have experienced a little “cool” parent envy myself – it is a point of caution.  Their friends are not your friends. The goal is to keep the connectivity alive through adulthood and not to short circuit it in teenage years. Like all stages of parenting, there is no blueprint for how to connect with your teenagers.  You need to establish which gatherings work for your family in your circumstances.  Family traditions that are established in early childhood are the power for communication that is the wire for connectivity throughout the teenage years, with the ultimate objective being its transformation throughout adulthood. By Natalie Lee, Teacher at Pecanwood College

Parenting Hub

What to do if your teenager is depressed

Growing up can be an emotional rollercoaster, during which a young person has to contend with many high and lows, from school and friendships to puberty and their sexuality. If you have noticed that your teenager seems to be experiencing more lows than highs, and these lows are happening more and more frequently, this may be a sign that they are struggling with depression. It can be distressing to watch your teenager feel constantly sad and low. However, it’s important to know that you’re not alone, and the most important step you can take to help is to seek help.  Here, we provide information on the symptoms of depression in teenagers to look out for, as well as guidance on the ways that you can support them. What does depression feel like for your teenager? Whilst it’s normal to feel sad occasionally, the intense and overwhelming low moods that depression causes can stop your teenager from getting pleasure from things they usually enjoy. This all-encompassing sadness can also prevent them from being able to function and perform daily tasks. We have outlined what depression actually feels like for a teenager to help you understand what they may be going through: For young people, depression can feel like they have a sieve in their head, which washes away all positive reinforcements and keeps hold of all negativity, which they focus on and magnify A teenager may feel like they are wearing a mask in front of friends. They will put on this brave face to cover up how they really feel, as they believe that they will be a burden if they show their real mood. This mask can be exhausting to wear, so by the time they come home they often can’t keep it up, meaning that you are likely to see the true picture Many young people describe depression as being tortured in their head. Anything that they hear gets turned into something negative, and even if they are told by a specialist that their depression is treatable, they believe that they’re the only one that can’t get better Signs of depression in children If you are becoming increasingly worried about your teenager, we have outlined common symptoms that they may be experiencing and warning signs for you to look out for:  Psychological symptoms: Persistent sadness, or low mood  Anger and irritability Crying more than usual Being highly sensitive to bad news or rejection Feeling worthless or guilty Low self-esteem Poor concentration Indecisiveness Feeling empty or numb Self-harming Suicidal thoughts Drugs or alcohol abuse Social symptoms: Social withdrawal Lacking interest in activities they once enjoyed Poor performance and behaviour at school or college Physical symptoms: Insomnia, or sleeping more than usual Frequent headaches and stomach aches Eating more or less than usual Unexplained digestive problems Exhaustion Lethargy Restlessness I think my teenager is depressed – what are the next steps? Talk to your child If you’re worried, sit down with your child and calmly explain that you’re concerned because they don’t seem to be themselves lately. If they’re willing to open up to you, try to find out how they are feeling and what is troubling them, and let them know that you’re always there to talk. If your teenager doesn’t want to talk to you, encourage them to speak to someone else they trust, such as another parent or a teacher.  Take them seriously  If you haven’t experienced depression yourself, it can be difficult to understand what your teenager is going through. Something that doesn’t seem to be a problem to you could be a major issue for your child, which is why it’s important to take them seriously and avoid being judgemental or critical.  Be open and listen If your teenager wants to talk to you about their problems, it’s important to be open with them and listen to what they have to say. This lets them know it’s OK to talk about how they’re feeling, and they’re not alone.  Learn the symptoms By familiarising yourself with the symptoms of teenage depression, not only will this help you to empathise with your child, but will also mean that you are able to spot when they’re going through a particularly difficult time. It can also help you to manage expectations, and understand that it’s possible that things may get worse for your teenager before they get better. Reduce risks Give them the phone numbers for charities such as LifeLine, and encourage them to call if they ever need to. You could also give them useful apps to look at such as Headspace or Mindspot. If they have thoughts about harming themselves, ask them to share those thoughts with you in a way that they feel comfortable with, so you can help keep them safe. They could write their thoughts down, send them in a text message or email, or talk to you about them when they’re feeling calm and perhaps distracted with an activity.  Things you can do to reduce risks include locking away any medication and asking the young person what websites they are accessing online, and talking through whether these are really helpful to them or not.  It’s also important to establish the best way that you, as a parent, can support your teenager. Ask them what you can do to help; they may just want hugs, a distraction such as watching a film with you or not to be left alone at night time.  Seek help It’s crucial to seek professional help if you think your child is struggling with depression. This will ensure that they receive the support they need to prevent their depression from becoming worse. Make an appointment to see your GP; they will be able to recommend next steps.  Also, reassure your teenager that depression is treatable and advise them that it would be worth taking them to a doctor to find out if they have depression, and if so, to get them the right support. Dr Hayley van Zwanenberg

Mia Von Scha

Surviving matric results- a parent’s guide

I have a friend who used to work at the BBC going through the raw footage of all the horrors happening around the world and picking out the bits that were acceptable for the public to see. Her job was intense, but she was ok with it… until she became pregnant. There is something about being a parent that makes us more sensitive to the terrible things happening out there and heightens our empathy for other parents. Every year we hear about students who have committed suicide over their matric results, and we can’t help but put ourselves in the shoes of those parents and imagine the grief and regrets that they must be experiencing. That instinct to protect our offspring that wells up during pregnancy (and never leaves) goes into overdrive wondering how we can stop ourselves from ever being in the position of these unfortunate parents. The truth is, not matter what you do, this can still happen. But there are some things you can focus on to reduce the likelihood and to teach your kids some important life skills at the same time. Number one is to be a role model for failure. Yes, go out and fail at things! Do things that challenge you… push yourself a bit… and then when you fail show your children how to do it well. What does that mean? It means having a cry or expressing your disappointment that things didn’t work out the way you’d wanted and then openly (so that your kids can see the process) looking at the good that came out of the situation – what did you learn? Be proud of yourself for trying. Then take what you’ve learned, see where you need to improve or adapt or readjust your goal… and try again…. And again…. And again. Our kids have no idea how wonderful it is to learn through failure because we never do it ourselves. We live little safe lives where we don’t push ourselves beyond our current capabilities. And this gives them the impression that everything must be done right first time or that everything is easy. Secondly, communicate, communicate, communicate. Know what is going on in your child’s life. Discuss feelings and practical things and life lessons and anything else you can think of. Have family meals that are non-negotiable and do not involve electronics at the table. Set aside time to connect. You need to look for signs of depression (changes in appetite or sleeping habits, loss of interest in activities, social withdrawal, irritability, fatigue, etc), but also know that many suicides are not preempted by depression. So if your child is not showing these typical signs it does not mean that they are safe. In these chats with your kids tell them about your own past. Give them a reference point by sharing times when you have had to adjust course or make a plan B. Teach them how to explore alternatives. And lastly, never ever ever equate who your child is with the marks that they get on a test.  Always be the champion of your child – the one who acknowledges their disappointment and helps them to find the learnings without lambasting them for their failures. Help your children to differentiate who they are with what they do. Help them to discover who they are and the connection between following your heart and success (which often is not part of the school curriculum). Lay off the pressure to do well in matric.  Matric is one year out of a potential 100 or more years of life that your children have on this earth. It is not the make or break for the rest of their lives. There are ample opportunities to redo matric, to discover another path, to find success.  Remember that nurturing instinct that arrives with your baby and reconnect with that now. Your baby might be a 6-foot teen, but your child still needs that love and care and support and protection that you offered them so easily when they were born.  It is love, kindness and communication that will help our kids through matric and beyond, not pressure, threats, bribes or stern motivational talks. Make absolutely sure that your children know that whatever their results you will always be there for them and will help them to navigate this difficult time.

Parenting Hub

Help! My child is unwilling to study for their exams

The long-anticipated year-end exams are upon us and so are the challenges and pressures that, so often, go hand-in-hand with the experience. Cindy Glass, Director and Co-founder of Step Up Education Centres explains “ It is crunch-time now and Grade 4 to 12 learners are busy working on the preparation necessary to achieve the best results possible. But, alas, not ALL learners feel motivated or willing to put in the effort that is needed at this time. Some learners may, in fact, show little or any interest in studying for their exams, leaving parents and teachers feeling worried about what can be done about it.”   Is your child unwilling or unmotivated to study for the exams?  Cindy gives the following top tips to help you and your child through this stressful time: Remember that most negative behaviours are rooted in fear.  Have a conversation with your child to try and establish what they may be afraid of.  Fear can make them feel completely overwhelmed and it may just seem easier to look the other way when it comes to exam preparation or, worse, give up altogether! Help them put their fears into perspective – help them to understand that all they CAN do is their best.  Break the seemingly overwhelming task into bite-sized manageable pieces.  Help or encourage your child to concentrate on working through past exam papers. Structure study times so that a goal is set to achieve a certain amount of work in the given time.  This will give your child a wonderful sense of achievement when each task is completed. Remind your child that, in life, there are some ‘yucky’ things that need to be done to get where you want to go. It means that, despite perhaps not enjoying the necessity of study, it needs to be done. Explain to your child that the first 10minutes of any challenging activity is the worst.  Once you get past that 10 minute mark, you seem to ‘roll’ more easily. Just get to it and see how it works! Help your child understand that exams are their responsibility.  You are there to encourage and support them, but ultimately, the responsibility of whether to honour themselves by putting in the effort that is needed, is up to them. Make sure that your home environment is conducive to effective studying.  Keep the noise levels down, speak positively, encourage and praise any progress.  Try and have something to look forward to once the exams have been completed. A movie evening, a day at the beach, or the promise of enjoying a favoured meal.   This needs to be a reward for the hard work that was put into the exam process. Cindy concludes by saying “Exams can feel overwhelming and fear can cause some children to’ shut down’ at this time.  All children want to achieve-whether they admit it or not!  Don’t give up, the rewards will be worth it!”

Parenting Hub

“FORTNITE”- Friend or Foe?

By Sonia Jansen, Deputy Principal of Academics at Crawford Preparatory North Coast Recently, I’ve had the privilege of running a Nintendo Club for a group of over 40 children from Grade 5 to Grade 7. The Nintendo Schools League offers children the opportunity to game competitively in a safe environment under supervision. Only one game is played in the club – Splatoon 2 – a game with an age rating of 10+. Competitive banter and excited cheers were the hallmark of our afternoon gaming sessions. In this time, I became pretty au fait with the terminology and social interaction between young gamers and learned that many of young players spend time playing a particular game called Fortnite. Fortnite, an online, multiplayer shooter game played by an estimated 50 million people daily, is free and easily accessible to anyone with internet access and a range of devices. Basically, players find themselves on an island and have to fight for resources, weapons and ultimately, survival. While online, players chat to each other. Each game can last in the region of 20 minutes. Common Sense Media (https://www.commonsensemedia.org/game-reviews/fortnite), a website providing independent reviews, rates Fortnite at 13+.  Realising that some of the players are as young as 8, I was prompted to investigate further. So for the information of parents out there who aren’t too sure what the game is about, here are some of my observations: Cautions: There is some violence (however, not as much, or as brutal and realistic, as many other games out there). Play is online and team members can essentially be anyone. Communication is open between the team members, which may expose young children to unsupervised contact with gamers they do not know. Children are found to be playing until early hours of the morning, which has an impact on learning, academic performance and social interaction when they’re tired and cranky the next day. Positives: A team game, Fortnite requires a measure of collaboration and communication. The need for strategy may encourage executive functioning skills such as critical thinking and organisation. In fact, the game as a whole, requires quite a lot of skill. So – the choice is yours …Ultimately, the decision to let your child play Fortnite, or not, is a personal one. My recommendation is that if you are going to allow your child to play any computer games, consider the following: pay attention to the recommended age rating  ensure that their play time is monitored and that devices are left in a “time-out” box in the living room, rather than their bedroom.  play with your child – teach them how to game safely under your guidance and supervision. monitor their response to the game and the level of violence of that particular game, and let your decision be guided by your own knowledge of your child. limit their game time – many hours of unchecked playing can lead to physical and social issues. consider the opinions and advice of other parents by reading as much as you can about the games your children choose to play. For more information, and to read parent reviews on Fortnite, you can go to: https://www.commonsensemedia.org/game-reviews/fortnite 

Parenting Hub

What to do if your parents don’t agree with your study choices

Many Matrics considering their study options for next year are finding themselves in the difficult position of being at odds with their parents or guardians about their preferred direction. While this conundrum has always been around, it is even more pronounced today, given that there are a myriad qualifications and careers that didn’t exist even a few years ago. “Parents often have expectations of the potential careers they see their children pursuing, and it can be hard for them and their children to get on the same page when the parents are in favour of the more traditional qualifications, while the child would prefer to pursue a qualification the parents don’t know much about,” says Nola Payne, Head of Faculty: Information and Communications Technology at The Independent Institute of Education, SA’s largest private higher education institution. She says it is important for families to have a respectful dialogue based on facts and research when they find themselves in this position. “If you are the young adult who would like to pursue a career in, for instance, digital marketing or game design and development, but your parents would rather you do a BCom at a public university, there are ways to get them to see your side of things,” she says. “And if you are the concerned parent, worried that your child’s preferred qualification is lightyears away from what you think they should be doing, there are also a few ways you can set your mind at ease,” says Payne. She says it can be helpful for parents and future students finding themselves at loggerheads to approach the situation as follows: DO THE RESEARCH AND UNDERSTAND THE OPTIONS There are many more study options today than in the past. The range of qualifications on offer has grown exponentially, while the institutions offering them have also multiplied. All registered and accredited higher education institutions – whether they be public universities or private – are registered by the Department of Higher Education and Training (DHET).   They are only registered if they have been accredited by the Council on Higher Education (CHE) and registered by the South African Qualifications Authority (SAQA) on the National Qualifications Framework (NQF). Looking up a qualification on the NQF is as easy as going to the SAQA website and typing in a few words.  An institution should also be able to give you the SAQA identity number immediately. This means that prospective students and their parents can be confident about the bona fides of any qualification they want to pursue, provided that the institution is recognised by DHET and the programme is listed on the NQF which can be found on the SAQA website. FACE REALITY The world of work looks a lot different today than it did a decade ago, with numerous new and emerging careers on offer, such as brand management, big data analysis, app development, and digital design, to name a few. The traditional, generic 3-year degree is no longer a golden ticket to landing a job. Prospective students would do well to pursue a career-focused qualification which fits well with their talents and interests, and which will prepare them to step into the workplace with confidence. Career-focused qualifications will often also include work-integrated learning, which allows students to build a portfolio of work throughout their time at varsity. This puts them in a much stronger position after graduation when applying for a position. UNDERSTAND THE MARKETPLACE What can you do with your qualification after graduation? That is an important question to ask before committing to a programme. A great way to determine the demand for a qualification and your future earning potential, is to look at career sites and job ads, to see how much demand there is in marketplace. Speaking to an advisor at a higher education institution’s career centre can also go a long way to clarifying your prospects post-graduation. UNDERSTAND THE MOTIVATION FOR STUDYING Pursuing a degree requires a substantial investment of time and money. And handling the demands of higher education and young adulthood is not a walk in the park. The dropout rate among first years is very high, in part because the reason for heading to university wasn’t sound. So if the motivation for further study is for the sake of status rather than to lay the foundations for a specific and successful career, or if a student is only studying to fulfil the wishes of their parents, it would be better to wait, investigate all the options, and only apply when they have found something that gets them really excited about your future. “Parents need to understand that the best approach now is to study and prepare for a world that’s changing, and that the traditional way and ‘safe’ careers may not be the best course of action,” says Payne. “And prospective students need to understand that while the difference in opinion may be frustrating, it is up to them to present their case calmly, clearly and respectfully, with the research to back up the viability and prospects of their choice.”

Parenting Hub

Children are not Adults

By Alison Willems, teacher at Trinityhouse Pre-Primary Randpark Ridge Children are not little adults. They learn things primarily through their experiences and modeling their parents and others around them, rather than verbal explanations. Being kind to your child is more effective in teaching kindness than an explanation of why it is good to be kind. Allowing a child to learn a concept by exploring it and experimenting with it through play and trial and error is far more effective than telling them how something does or should work. There is a very valid reason behind why this is so. It all has to do with how God has created our bodies to grow and develop.  When referring to a child’s holistic development, our children develop in a specific order for a very specific reason. First comes physical development, so that they can learn to manage their bodies according to their space and environment around them. They learn about their own strengths and what their bodies can do. This physical learning is important because neurological pathways are being developed. If this does not happen, connections for later learning are hindered.  Next to develop is communication, this is to ensure that their survival and basic needs are met. They do this through basic language, eg: crying and one syllable words such as “mama” and “dada”. This should progress to more coherent sentence structure later on. The development of language is the start of their cognitive development. They are therefore not yet able to cognitively understand the adult world which utilizes such things as sarcasm, figurative language, innuendoes, etc. Their understanding of the world is literal and concrete. By the age of two they are taking more cognisance of things like tone and body language. Next come the social and emotional aspect of the child, this is the most complex part of development and therefore never stops developing, even into adulthood as it encompasses all relationships and our ability to manage ourselves within those relationships. That is why children who have missed developmental building blocks struggle in this area.  Children rely on their senses to give them feedback thereby evaluating their world around them. Hence, babies put things in their mouths and children want to, need to and have to touch things around them.  Our little people therefore need at least two of their senses involved in anything you want to teach them for it to be stored in their memories for recall later. For example, if a child has an item of their mom’s clothing, the smell of her will calm them when upset. This is why kinesthetic learning (using the body and its senses) is so important as they are moving, touching, hearing, seeing and sometimes tasting while learning. As a child effectively learns, the neurons in their brain are making connections. Neuron’s that are correctly ‘wired’ together effectively ‘fire’ together later in their lives. I would like to close with a well know quote from Benjamin Franklin: ‘Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn.’

Parenting Hub

Surfing with Smiles

We sat down with the Sugar Bay surfing PC (Pro Counselor), Smiles, on his surfing journey and who he thinks would win in a fight between Steven Seagal and Jean Claude van Damme. Real name Grant Anderson, was born in Johannesburg, Gauteng and went to North Cliff primary school before the Anderson tribe moved to sunny Durban in 2009. The surfing bug bit him at just 10 years old and he has never looked back. As a past camper at the Bay, he loved the positive influence the counselors had on him. “I felt like I could be myself, I was exposed to the one thing I love most in the world and I was surrounded by the most amazing people.” Wanting to shine that light on someone else, in 2016, he joined our C.I.T (Counselors in Training) course where he had goals to become the surfing PC and the counselor he had always wanted to be. What’s your favourite part about teaching children how to surf?  “Just being able to share my passion with someone, who either have been surfing or wants to learn how to surf. It allows me to be a part of their journey and to see them grow is such a privilege.”  What childhood memory do you have of surfing?  “Standing on a board I still have today and catching a wave on my own for the very first time.”  What type of kid do you think your teachers would say you were at school?  “Definitely a leader, I was also a good example and a role model to the younger pupils.” What’s the one thing people don’t know about you?  (Shrugs) ” hahahahaha. I honestly don’t know.” Between Steven Seagal and Jean-Claude van Damme, who do you think would win the fight? “Steven Seagal any day!” 

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Curating your career starts in school

Teenagers are accustomed to curating their personal image on social media. They select what to share, who to tag and how to display their interests and activities in a snapshot, or a few hash tags. The next step for Generation Z, those born after 1995, is to start curating their career. Whether preparing to apply for a competitive university programme or starting an entrepreneurial venture, there is great value in starting to think about how to express one’s professional interests from an early age. “Your extra-curricular activities during high school help you stand out from the crowd when applying for universities, especially top-ranked international ones,” says Duncan Parsons, Regional Manager for Crimson Education, a mentoring company that helps build high-schoolers’ candidacy to apply for universities in the States and United Kingdom. “Admissions boards are looking for well-rounded candidates with interesting personal stories – not just top marks.” A report by brand management specialists, QWERTY found that nearly 70% of South Africans’ weekly activities are spent on social media channels. Growing up with the internet, Gen Zs have become accustomed to plugging hours into Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat. They’re great at capturing their personal image online; which brands they associate with and which moments they share. Applying some of this time and skill to thinking about their careers can be hugely beneficial for when they finish school. “Demonstrating a variety of skills and interests is a crucial part of an applicant’s success. Universities are increasingly interested in personal stories and motivations,” says Parsons. Crimson Education’s research indicates that about 30% of an application to an American university is based on activities outside of academic curricula; “Colleges look for and fund students who demonstrate that they’ll use the university’s resources to the fullest – they want to see initiative and the potential to become a leader in your field.” Teachers, parents and school counsellors also play an important role in encouraging students to explore exciting career and study opportunities; “With the right guidance and support, students can start a small business or launch a social initiative before they even matriculate. Doing so will help them refine their interests and ultimately select the best fit programme at university, regardless of whether they study locally or abroad,” says Parsons. A great university education, at an institution with leading research groups, lecturers and students from around the world can be a powerful starting point for future change makers. According to Parsons, landing that opportunity is challenging, but not impossible, for driven South African students who apply their finely tuned social media curating skills to their careers. Crimson Education launched in South Africa earlier this year, making the company operational in 17 cities around the world. Parsons and his team regularly host information evenings for parents and learners interested in studying overseas and have recently introduced a career exploration service. For more information, visit www.crimsoneducation.org or email southafrica@crimsoneducation.org.

Parenting Hub

Maths Matter: Why it’s worth sticking it out when the going gets tough

In senior high school, the Mathematics syllabus becomes more challenging than ever, and many learners may be tempted to ditch the subject in favour of something less taxing, particularly if they intend to pursue a career that ostensibly doesn’t require Maths. But an expert advises learners and parents to think very carefully before doing so, as a solid grounding in the subject can make a lifelong difference not only to one’s career prospects, but also to those areas of life which seemingly have nothing to do with numbers. “At school we are told regularly that if we do not keep Mathematics as a subject we will not gain access to a Commerce or Science degree of our choice.  What we often do not hear is that apart from providing access to limited enrolment degrees, sticking with Maths provides important life skills and a competitive advantage you won’t find anywhere else,” says Aaron Koopman, Head of Programme: Faculty of Commerce at The Independent Institute of Education, SA’s largest private higher education provider. Koopman says that even those learners opting for Maths Literacy should continue to take the mathematical steps and processes seriously, as a solid grounding in Maths truly sets one up for life. “Maths teaches you so much – from the memory and recall skills you gained from learning your times tables, to the focus and concentration that mental arithmetic calculations strengthen, through to the most important skills of all related logic, reason and problem-solving,” he says. “Sure, you may never have to solve a quadratic equation again if you pursue a career in communication, but you will be required to understand a problem and the correct sequence of steps required to solve it, and there is no better place to get that discipline and expertise than from Maths.” Koopman says Maths also enables you to understand sequencing and planning – starting at the right point and working methodically to get the right answer. And when it does not work out the way it should, it is one’s mathematical and analytical skills that help you to work through each step and figure out why things did not turn out the way they should have. “Furthermore, Mathematics is believed to encourage creativity. Not only does it teach clear and sensible thought, but it exposes learners to challenging concepts and unresolved problems. Through this experience, learners can apply themselves in resolving these problems, often in a creative manner.” It is also now well understood that nature follows many mathematical rules – and proportion, balance and pattern are all mathematical concepts, notes Koopman. “That balance between creative freedom and leveraging the repetitive sequence of patterns that results in things humans see as beautiful is at the heart of much art that has continued to appeal over the centuries. “Maths also helps you develop persistence as you apply and discard solutions while trying to make sense of a problem.  Maths is the bridge between the world we live in – think of the ‘story sums’ we started in our early grades – and the creative and brilliant solutions that lie behind the world’s best inventions.” And very importantly, companies are increasingly looking for graduates with powerful thinking and troubleshooting capacity – just the competencies that are developed and nurtured through mathematics. “A young person who is mathematically proficient and has honed these skills will find that the world of work is a flexible and engaging space where how you learn is recognised as so much more valuable than what you learned.  From understanding numbers and statistics – the ‘hard skills’ that Maths gives you – to applying systematic and logical reasoning or solving a human resource problem, a mind that has been exercised by Maths will reach strong conclusions quickly and have the skills to test itself,” Koopman says. “The systematic nature of Mathematics develops clear and coherent thought of students. This results in the ability to understand how and why things work in a certain way. In a business environment that is characterised by constant change, the analysis of one’s environment becomes fundamentally important and through Mathematics, analytical skills and critical thinking is promoted. Mathematics equips learners with the ability to be proactive, detect problems and to develop suitable solutions earlier, which provides a competitive advantage regardless of one’s field.” As we move into the fourth industrial revolution, in which technological innovation is at the forefront, graduates who did not necessarily study Maths but retained an engagement and respect for it will be well positioned to propel their organisations and respective divisions in the right direction, says Koopman. Additionally, anyone leading a team or department regardless of industry will need to be financially literate and able to manage sometimes substantial budgets. “Therefore we encourage learners to persevere and if necessary get additional help to master Maths, even if they feel they may not ‘need’ Maths in future. Regardless of what you are planning to do career-wise, a solid grounding in Maths will empower you for the rest of your life,” Koopman says.

Parenting Hub

Getting your Gen Z child through the stresses of Matric

As parents, we often think that because we once wrote Matric exams ourselves, we are perfectly capable of supporting our child through the biggest trial of their education so far. The trick however, is to be mindful of the vast generational gap that exists between our children and ourselves. Our kids are going to experience the upcoming Matric exams quite differently from the way we did. And if we’re going to be able to help them, we need to understand their generation as well as we possibly can. The ABCs of Gen Z Gen Z refers to those children/teenagers born between 1995 and 2009 and as with all other generations, this cohort has distinct strengths and weaknesses.  In broad strokes: the positive traits that Gen Z have on their side include higher IQs than Baby Boomers, greater ambition than Millennials and a well-developed sense of responsibility. Gen Z are also the first generation to be been entirely digitally immersed and are often referred to as ‘Digital Natives’. They simply can’t imagine a world without smartphones, Google and WiFi (a kid with a device permanently in hand is something every Gen Z parent can relate to). Gen Z’ers prefer almost everything that is digitally presented and are highly adept at discovering and learning on their own.   A different kind of learning For most parents, learning means sitting diligently at a desk poring over textbooks. However, your Gen Z child will most probably prefer to do a lot of studying for their Matric exams sprawled on the couch and watching videos of their favourite YouTube teachers. Gen Z’ers also have a tendency towards social learning and can readily turn an online chat with friends into a peer-learning classroom. “Parents of the current Matric cohort need a real understanding of how their child learns best,” says Lauren Martin, Counselling Psychologist and Head of Teaching and Learning at SACAP (The South African College of Applied Psychology).  “You don’t want to make the mistake of shutting down or getting in the way of what is highly effective learning for them because you have misinterpreted what they might be doing on YouTube or on FaceTime. Gen Z learns differently from other generations, and they need different parental awareness and support. If a parent is helping or monitoring their child’s study plan, they need to support space in the timetable for digital and social learning.” Digital multi-taskers Another generational anomaly (and potential minefield) is Gen Z’s uncanny ability to digitally multi-task. They can watch TV, quickly post on Instagram while having a WhatsApp conversation with five friends, Google something on their laptop and make long-hand notes simultaneously. It’s the kind of multi-tasking that brings on anxiety and despair for other generations, but Gen Z – with their short attention spans and tech-savviness – take it in their cyber stride. The upshot is that parents, who for the most part view multitasking as a negative, try to curb their teen’s many-at-once habits. “During the Matric exams, parents typically want to limit distractions to sharpen the focus on studying,” says Martin. “This is a challenge for Gen Z students who have a different perception of what constitutes a ‘distraction’. It’s important for parents to have a clear view of their child’s real competencies and allow them to plan for their Matric study time in the ways that work best for them. You can’t forget that they will most likely prepare best by doing some things very differently to the way you did them.” The weak spots to watch Gen Z reports higher levels of anxiety and depression. This is a generation shaped by being born into a perilous world of economic recession, rising terrorism and major global environmental threats. They are predisposed to worry and feeling chronically unsafe. Mental health issues amongst Gen Z are prevalent. “Helping to manage stress might well be the greatest thing a parent can do support their child through this Matric year,” says Jogini Packery, Counselling Psychologist and Head of Student Services at SACAP. “This starts with managing their own stress so that they can model dealing well with strong emotions and a tense life circumstance. Maintaining balance and facilitating effective stress relief will go a long way to soothe high anxiety. Often Gen Z does not get out enough. All of their screen time means less time on the beach or going for a run, cycle or a walk with the dogs. Physical activity stimulates the endorphins that help to keep anxiety and depression in check. If a parent is giving input on a study plan they should check out the downtime and see where they can encourage and share in healthy physical activities that deliver important stress relief.” For any matriculant who is interested in the field of psychology, counselling or Human Resource Management, SACAP offers a wide range of qualifications (including Higher Certificate, Diploma, BAppSocSci (Majoring in Psychology and counselling), BAppSocSci (Majoring in Psychology and Human Resource Management) BPsych, BSocSci Honours and BPsych Equivalent) and a one-of-a-kind approach to learning: academic rigour and applied skills. Graduating confident skilled practitioners is key, which is why SACAP combines an academically rigorous curriculum with a strong emphasis on the ability to apply knowledge through the training of relevant skills. Registration for 2019 term one, closes at the end of January 2019. For further information, visit: https://www.sacap.edu.za/matric-campaign/

RediscoverDairy

Why breakfast really is the best way to start your day

The importance of breakfast has long been a part of the prevailing wisdom, and the habit of eating breakfast has always been a marker of a healthy lifestyle.  Yet, if there’s a meal that is going to be skipped, it’s probably breakfast; and this is a pity because research clearly shows that there are many vital health benefits associated with eating breakfast regularly.  Studies show that 1 in 5 South African children skip breakfast. For the first time, a broad coalition of health partners including leading non-profit organisations, health professional associations as well the National and Provincial Departments of Health, have aligned National Nutrition Week (9 – 15 October 2018) with National Obesity Week (15 – 19 October 2018) to promote a shared and very important message that eating breakfast is the best way to start your day. After our longest fast, a healthy breakfast kick-starts the metabolism, lights up mental functioning and boosts physical energy on a day-to-day basis.  However, the health benefits of breakfast are not just experienced over the short-term.  Studies show that eating a healthy breakfast regularly over the long term helps to reduce risks of heart disease and stroke, high blood pressure and Type 2 diabetes.  This correlates with studies that show that children, adolescents and adults who eat healthy breakfasts regularly have better, sustainable weight outcomes and are at a lower risk of becoming overweight and obesity. “It is ironic that one of the common reasons for skipping breakfast is the desire to lose weight when it has the opposite effects,” says Rebone Ntsie, Director: Nutrition at the National Department of Health.  “The lack of breakfast leads to a far greater risk of compensating with unhealthy snacks to get through to lunchtime and with bigger lunch portions.”  Ntsie points outs that, according to the 2016 South Africa Demographic and Health Survey, 68% of women and 31% of men in South Africa are overweight or obese. Life-threatening, severe obesity affects around 20% of women and 3% of men.  Approximately 13.3% of children under 5 years of age are overweight or obese; and according to the 2012 South African Health and Nutrition Examination Survey (SANHANES), 14.2% children aged 6 to 14 years are overweight or obese. CEO of the Heart and Stroke Foundation South Africa, Professor Pamela Naidoo says: “At least 80% of early deaths caused by heart disease and stroke can be avoided by following a healthy diet, which includes eating a healthy breakfast, in combination with regular physical activity and avoiding the use of tobacco.  It is important to understand how the food choices we make contribute to overweight and obesity.” Many South Africans consume large amounts of sugary drinks and eat a lot of  convenience foods that are typically high in sugar and fats.  There’s also a common preference for highly refined starchy foods over those that are minimally processed and healthier.  Taking in too much food energy from nutrient-poor foods leads to weight gain. However, making poor food choices is not the only issue.  Professor Naidoo points out that our modern lifestyles easily lead to ‘portion distortion’.  “Large portion size is also a major contributor to weight gain whether people eat out or at home,” she says. “With a gradual increase in the amount of food being purchased and served ready cooked, many people can no longer recognise the size of a healthy portion.”   Lack of knowledge and poor food choices lead to unhealthy diets, which are a risk factor for non-communicable diseases.  Dr Christine Taljaard-Krugell, ADSA (Association for Dietetics in South Africa) President, points out the importance of engaging with a registered dietitian to help make healthy breakfasts a habit for the whole family.  “Other reasons so many South Africans skip breakfast include food not being available, it not being a family routine, time pressure in the mornings, not feeling hungry or not liking typical breakfast foods.  From food budgeting to menu planning and meal preparation, there are solutions to all these issues.  Information and help are available.” What should a healthy breakfast consist of? Breakfast should consist of at least one food group (excluding beverages). However, to stay fuller for longer and improve the variety of nutrients you take in at breakfast, it helps to include foods from three or more food groups. A rule of thumb is to choose a minimally processed starchy food combined with a food from at least one of the following groups: vegetables or fruit dry beans, lentils, split peas, soya fish, chicken, lean meat or eggs milk, maas or yoghurt plant oils, soft margarine, peanut butter In addition, it is important to drink clean safe water instead of a sugary drink. The ‘breakfast is the best way to start the day’ campaign offers some key messages to inspire making a healthy breakfast a long-lasting habit and family routine: Be ‘breakfast ready’ and beat the morning rush – Breakfast doesn’t have to be a big production – with some planning and preparation, it can be quick and easy.  Before you go to bed at night, set up your kitchen for breakfast.  Soak the oats and slice the fruit so you don’t have to do it in the morning. Cook extra maize meal porridge for the next day’s breakfast when making supper, or boil some eggs the night before.  Make it healthy and enjoyable – “It’s easier to make breakfast a daily habit if you enjoy it,” says Carol Browne of the Nutrition Society of South Africa (NSSA).  “While our cultures may define what breakfast foods are, there are really no hard and fast rules.  It doesn’t matter whether you eat the same things as others for breakfast – it just matters that you have a healthy start to the day.  This means having a minimally processed starchy food, as part of the meal, and combining it with food from at least one other food group.” For example, maize meal porridge with maas and an apple; brown bread with pilchards and sliced tomato; Last

Parenting Hub

Is Stress Holding Your Teenager Back?

Teenagers grow up and eventually become the parents of teenagers!  The circle of life is such that we forget, often with some relief, what it was like to deal with the stressful challenges of our changing bodies, academic expectations and social interactions when WE were teenagers.  Cindy Glass, Director and Co-founder of Step Up Education Centres explains “The reality is that long-term, unchecked stress can lead to the greater challenges of anxiety, depression and negative behavioural choices in our teenagers.”  Cindy looks at this important subject in greater detail… 1. What causes stress in teenagers?  Teenagers are complex, over-thinkers by nature.  It is not surprising then, that what may seem to us to be a minor challenge, could indeed be a cause of debilitating stress in our teenager! Negative body, and self-image. School pressures, these can be social or academic. Making mistakes (including poor behaviour choices) and the fear of failure. Financial or personal concerns arising from their families. 2. What are the signs of excessive stress in teenagers? They start sleeping too much or too little. They experience panic attacks. They can start acting aggressively or withdrawing from activities that they once enjoyed. Fatigue that affects normal activities. Stressed teenagers tend to eat way too much or way too little. This would be out-of-character. Regular mood swings, crying and angry episodes can indicate excessive stress. 3. How can you help? Non-judgemental communication is key!  Aim to listen to understand!  Listen to support and help them find positive solutions. Challenges are a part of teenage life and cannot be avoided, just make sure your teen knows that you are the go-to person they need! Encourage your teen to exercise regularly and to make healthy nutrition choices.  A healthy, fit body can weather many-a-stressful-situation. Teach emotional intelligence skills: self-awareness, self-regulation, self-motivation, empathy and social skills are essential in developing positive body- and self- image.  These skills will also help your teenager navigate the complexities of interpersonal relationships!  Know that mistakes are inevitable. Speak of mistakes being learning opportunities and help your teen to find positive solutions. Discuss perspectives.  It is essential to understand that everyone is coming from his/her perspective and that, so often, upsetting encounters with others is as a result of their experiences and perspectives of life in that moment.  Remember, if you have not caused the negative encounter, it is not your stuff!  4. When would you need to seek expert help? Seek immediate professional help if your child is having suicidal thoughts. Seek help if the symptoms of stress are not subsiding or if they are getting worse.  Cindy explains “Stress can be a two-edged sword.  It can motivate us to positive action, and it can result in potentially serious emotional and physical challenges if it becomes long-term and excessive.  Watch for the latter and aim at seeking ways to ease the effects of negative stress in your teenagers!” 

Parenting Hub

Gearing university education for employability

More young people have university degrees than ever before. Between 1995 to 2016, the percentage of people with tertiary qualifications grew by 20%, this is according to the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development. As a result, competition for skilled positions is steeper, particularly when entering a workplace that is increasingly pressured, globalised, diverse and fast-paced. Checking the boxes for a qualification no longer guarantees a job, and employers scan their applicant pools for individuals that stand out. “Employers are looking for graduates with well-rounded knowledge, fresh perspectives, the ability to upskill and take on diverse roles. The specialised knowledge offered by traditional curricula is becoming less relevant to a workforce that requires adaptability and critical thinking skills,” says Rebecca Pretorius, Country Manager for Crimson Education, an education and mentoring company that works with high-schoolers to gain entry to top universities in the States and the United Kingdom. According to Pretorius, the South African tertiary curriculum is still geared towards specialised faculty-based education, with little overlap across different fields of study. Meeting the needs of the modern workplace requires a shift towards interdisciplinary studies, with the United States’ Liberal Arts curriculums offering a good example; “A liberal arts degree develops both soft and hard skills. At graduation, students have a broad knowledge base and skill-set to bring to the working world.” In the United States, the tertiary education system is geared towards fostering well-rounded knowledge, actively seeking to meet what employers are looking for. A survey by the Association of American Colleges and Universities found that 80% of employers think that students should acquire broad knowledge at university that stretches across the sciences and arts. In line with this, universities tailor their admission procedures towards finding candidates with diverse skills and interests. “While South African and UK application processes rely largely on academic results, US universities want to know a student’s passions, experience, extra-curricular projects and leadership abilities,” says Pretorius. A key determinant of securing a place is demonstrating a drive to take full advantage of the opportunities offered by the campus in question – from cultural clubs to top internships and research groups. Developed by graduates of some of the world’s top universities, Crimson Education’s mentorship combines academic tutoring with extra-curricular guidance and support, even encouraging students to launch a small business or develop a project. “Encouraging diversity from a young age equips a student with the tools they need to take on a changing working world,” says Pretorius.

Trinity House

How to help your child overcome peer pressure

Merriam-Webster defines peer pressure as: “A feeling that one must do the same things as other people of one’s age and social group in order to be liked or respected by them.” Children of all ages experience peer pressure. Most people think peer pressure is a bad thing (stealing, smoking, taking drugs, drinking alcohol); however, some peer pressure can be good. Your child wants to be liked and to do the right thing. As a parent, you can help your child deal with peer pressure and make good choices at every age and stage. Welcome positive peer pressure. If another child is pushing your child toward something better, that is a good thing. It might help your child socially or academically. For example, it might encourage your child to participate in the school talent show or rugby trials. Understand negative peer pressure. Your child wants to fit in, doesn’t want to feel rejected or teased, and isn’t sure how to get out of a bad situation. Start early by preparing your young child for peer pressure. When they are in preschool, tell them not to copy silly or bad behaviour. For example, if a friend or classmate pressures them to take something that doesn’t belong to them, teach them how to say “no” and walk away. As your child goes through preparatory school, talk with them about smoking, drugs, and alcohol. Peers pressure kids to sneak out of the house, bunk school, drive without a license (or ride with an underage driver), steal, vandalise property, and cheat, too. Give your child ideas of what to say when pressured. Practice this “role playing” often. This helps your child get out of a bad situation. Tell your child they can blame you if they need to get out of a bad situation. Give your child a special code word to say or text you if they can’t get out of a situation on their own. This will signal that they need help. Share your family values. It’s important to let your child know how you feel about stealing, cheating, bullying, and more. When a child knows something is wrong, they will think twice before agreeing to do it. Encourage your child to feel good about him or herself. Celebrate their achievements and praise them when they make good choices. Children who feel good about themselves are more likely to resist negative peer pressure. The same is true with friendships. Children who have friends whose families share your values are more likely to resist negative peer pressure. Monitor your child’s friendships (in-person and online).  There may be a day when your child makes a bad choice because peer pressure. When this happens, remain calm. It’s a good opportunity to teach your child about choices and having the courage to say no. Negative peer pressure can have a downward spiral effect. This means that pressure to commit small wrongs can lead to more serious bad behaviour. For example, if your child is easily pressured to take things that don’t belong to him, he or she might one day agree to experiment with shoplifting.  Don’t forget that the media and internet are forms of peer pressure. What your children hear and see on TV and online can influence your child’s choices. Monitor these influences by: Limiting your child’s exposure to TV and the internet. Consider your child’s age and other responsibilities (homework, job, family time) to decide on how much time he or she should be allowed to watch TV or explore the internet. Monitoring what your child watches or views on the internet. You can see your child’s internet search history on a computer. You also can check your child’s phone to see what apps he or she has downloaded. Require your child to provide his or her passwords in return for the privilege of accessing TV and digital media. Learning more about the music your child listens to. Some song lyrics can send powerful, negative messages. Watching TV or searching the internet together. This gives you an opportunity reinforce your family values. It also gives you an opportunity to sort out fact from fiction on certain things (drugs, alcohol, pregnancy, etc.). Securing your home’s TV and online devices. Most cable, internet, and cell phone providers have parent control settings that restrict inappropriate material from children.  Monitoring your child’s electronic use at their friend’s homes or when friends bring electronic devices to your home (laptops, tablets, phones). Tell your child what is and what is not allowed. written by Ria van Niekerk – Deputy Principal Trinityhouse Preparatory Randpark Ridge 

Advtech Group

Public university or private: Choose the right institution for you

There have been many developments in the higher education sector in past decades, notably a rise in the number of institutions from which prospective students can choose when considering their further education. Along with the increase in public universities, there has also been substantial growth in the private higher education sector. Faced with this increase in choice, it is natural for young people to be anxious about their decision – should I go to a public university, or should I opt for a private higher education institution? A massive part of this concern, is whether the qualification you receive after 3 or 4 years of study, will be respected in the world of work, whether it will position you well to land your first job, and whether it will help you build the career of your dreams. “It is so important that future students don’t base their decision on their gut feel or vague perceptions,” says Dr Felicity Coughlan, Director of The Independent Institute of Education and Group Academic Director at ADvTECH, Africa’s largest private education provider. She says there is a concrete checklist that prospective students should measure their chosen institution against and, if all the boxes are checked, they can rest assured that their choice of institution can help them achieve their dreams. “Ultimately, you have to make an informed choice based on your personal vision and circumstances, and you should not blindly follow a direction just because everyone else is going that route, or because you think that’s the way to go,” Coughlan says. She advises prospective students, and their parents or guardians, to look at the following when considering or reviewing higher education institutions: ACCREDITATION Most importantly, your institution must be registered and accredited. South Africa has a single quality assurance system and one National Qualifications Framework, which means that any institution offering a registered and accredited qualification – whether public university or private – is offering a qualification of equal standing. So if your institution is listed on the Department of Higher Education and Training’s list* of registered higher education institutions and colleges, you don’t need to be concerned about whether the institution is called a university, a college, or a private higher education institution. This is because the only difference between public (University) institutions and private higher education institutions – which purely as a result of regulations may not refer to themselves as private universities – is that the public institutions get some subsidy from the government while the private institutions don’t. EMPLOYER RECOGNITION The world of work has changed dramatically over the past decade, and the economic climate is tough. That means prospective students should make sure that their qualification and their choice of institution is well respected by employers and in the market. Generic 3-year degrees with no practical experience do not provide a strong competitive advantage after graduation. This means that young people should interrogate their institution about the following: curriculum, industry relationships, lecturer activity in the industry, and practical experience that form part of the studies. The strongest qualifications today are the ones that are closely linked to specific careers and fields, and whose curricula are based on the competencies required to be work-ready from day one. One way of determining industry recognition of your institution, is to ask about its career fairs, when the country’s top companies visit campuses to meet students. If employers are lining up to meet the leaders of tomorrow at your institution, you can be assured that you are signing up for a quality education that is respected in the workplace. INTERNATIONAL RECOGNITION Many students want to know that their qualifications will be internationally recognised. If this is important for you, you should ask your institution about international links and accreditation. Does your institution have links with international exchange programmes, or is it accredited by an independent international accreditation council? All good institutions should be able to provide satisfactory answers to your questions about your potential international opportunities. CLASS SIZES & STUDENT SUPPORT Class sizes and student support are crucial for ensuring student success and successful transition into the world of work. Individual attention, and being more than a number, can dramatically influence student outcomes. But an institution’s involvement should go further than quality lectures and success at exam time. Good institutions will have career centres which assist students and alumni beyond academics. “The higher education landscape looks entirely different today from the way things were even a decade ago. These days, prospective students have a lot more choice in terms of institution and qualification,” says Coughlan. “To really make the right choice in terms of the best grounding for your career dreams, you have to look beyond historical perceptions and gut feelings about which way is ‘the best’ way, and make sure your choice is based on the facts about what makes one institution and qualification stand out from the next one,” she says. *www.dhet.gov.za/SitePages/DocRegisters.aspx

Parenting Hub

Conversations to have with your young adult before University life

By Tracey Terespolsky (English Teacher and Parent at Crawford College Sandton) As I sit before you on the eve of your departure, I am swamped by a plethora of emotions. You are embarking on such a life changing adventure – one that will shape your life and have a far greater impact on you than anything else that you have experienced to date. To this end, there are some thoughts that I want to share with you that I believe will ease the transition. There is such a huge gap between the school system and University life. You have been blessed to attend a school where the emphasis has been on forging the students into independent, feisty, free thinking individuals. However, as you enter the portals of the University, the element of personal interaction is diminished to a point where it barely exists. The challenges of “adulting” that you have been chomping at the bit to embrace, are about to become a harsh reality. So, from day one my advice to you is go to your lectures. It may be cool to chill on Campus with friends who are studying different degrees, but once you fall behind, the volume and level of difficulty is such that you can just never catch up. It may be tempting that your lectures are online. Let’s be honest, though, the likelihood of you actually watching those lectures that you have missed, are close to zero!! Campus life is vibrant. Embrace it fully – join societies that interest you and make an effort to meet other people. It is fantastic that so many of your school mates are going to be there, but part of the University experience is learning to expand your horizons. Sport is such an awesome way to integrate into a new environment so use your sporting prowess to full advantage. Possibly the best advice that I can give you is to strike a balance in your life. At school, that was pretty easy to achieve. Now, however, with the sheer volume of work, adjusting to living away from home – both from an emotional and a practical point of view – the challenge is both real and daunting. In order to achieve a balance, your organisational skills are going to be tested and need to be on point!! Remember though, that these skills are a work in progress. I am still trying many years later to hone them. The bottom line is this – you are about to enter a phenomenal phase of your life. You get to test your mettle with regards to living as an adult but the consequences are not nearly as onerous as they become once you enter the world of the working person. Make the most of the incredible opportunities that are about to come your way and, in and amongst all the heightened responsibilities that I have painstakingly pointed out to you, have FUN. This is still a very carefree time of your life.  Work hard, play hard……. 

Parenting Hub

‘Gap it’ to success!

Matriculant, not sure what you want to do with your life? Or perhaps you do know, BUT you simply don’t have enough money to pursue the career of your dreams next year? Don’t despair, Tiffiny Thomas, Owner and Founder of Blue Bird Aupairs has a solution! “A Gap Year,” says Tiffiny “is the perfect opportunity for young adults to not only find their feet in the world, but to also earn money at the same time!”  Whilst traditional trips abroad may not be an affordable Gap-Year option for most young South Africans, Tiffiny says that it doesn’t mean that they can’t ‘Gap it’ in their own backyard. “Taking a year off to discover yourself doesn’t have to cost and arm and a leg. In fact, if you do it right, you can actually make money to travel AND save towards your studies!” Plus, the opportunity to get real-life experience is something that you simply can’t pass up “You will be updating your CV with valuable experience that will give you an edge over other young adults once you hit the job market and officially start your career,” Tiffiny explains. From being an in-store promoter or waitressing at a restaurant to tutoring younger children after school, these are the kinds of jobs that are available to students who are reliable and willing to work hard, says Tiffiny. She adds that there has been a rise in the demand for young au pairs who are passionate and responsible. “More and more, working parents are turning to young role models to take care of their children in the afternoon instead of leaving them at the school aftercare,” Tiffiny explains.   The best part? Studies have shown that Students who take a gap year have improved academics compared to students who didn’t take a gap year! 

SciBuddy

Foldscope – When paper art and science meet.

A paper microscope that will change the way children learn about science. As a rule, microscopes are expensive, delicate instruments. Certainly not a suitable toy for an eight-year-old and probably the last thing parents would think of giving to a child. But what about a microscope made from paper that costs around R40? A microscope that is water-resistant, tough, and small enough to fit in a shirt pocket, or slotted into a book? Enter the Foldscope, an innovative piece of equipment that is set to change the way science is taught at school and at home. Most schools in South Africa are not lucky enough to have a single microscope, let alone one for each child. And most children never have the opportunity to use a microscope or to freely explore what the inventor of Foldscope calls the “microcosmos”. It is an accepted fact that children learn best through experiences rather than instruction, and hands-on activities form a critical part of experiential learning. Experiential learning also stimulates the imagination, inspires curiosity, and nurtures a love for learning in general. How can we expect our children to be excited about science when it is inaccessible, and its education is usually one-dimensional? One of the reasons that South African schools perform consistently poorly in maths and science is a lack of access to appropriate equipment and materials. Now imagine what could happen if every child had access to a microscope, or even better, their OWN microscope. Before the invention of the Foldscope, this was a near impossibility for the majority of South African schools.  What about a microscope at home? Picture yourself exploring the garden with your child, collecting flowers or insects, and studying them using the Foldscope. Even something as simple as examining the difference between salt or sugar crystals could be a fun and educational activity. For homeschoolers, a tool like the Foldscope is invaluable to enhance their studies. By motivating our children to spend time in and interacting with nature, the Foldscope could also provide a way to reduce the time spent in front of a screen. A Foldscope starts out as a flat sheet of plastic-coated paper, precut into shapes that are folded and slotted together to form a fully functioning microscope. Its magnification is similar to the microscopes found in classrooms and research laboratories, meaning it can easily magnify plant and animal cells, insect parts like wings or eyes, pollen, hair and follicles, a variety of microorganisms, algae, red blood cells, and larvae; the list is endless. As long as a sample can fit on a standard microscope slide, it can be viewed with a Foldscope. One of its most attractive features is the ability to couple with the camera on a cell phone or tablet. This gives children the opportunity to take photos and videos and to share their findings with friends, parents, and teachers. By attaching the Foldscope to a cell phone’s flash, the image can also be projected onto a screen.  Teachers all over the world are starting to see the fantastic possibilities for getting children excited about science, biology, and engineering. In the United States and India, Foldscopes are now regularly used in the science classroom.  South African schools, especially resource-poor schools, could also certainly benefit from having these devices in the classroom. In fact, if we hope to ever compete with the rest of the world in terms of science and maths, tools like the Foldscope are essential. Foldscopes come in kits of 20 or 100 basic units, perfect for classroom use. To keep the costs down, these kits also come with a limited number of accessories that are to be shared among learners. Sales of Deluxe individual kits, including an extensive set of accessories for home use, partially subsidize the classroom kits.  SciBuddy, a new player in the field of scientific educational materials, is the exclusive distributor of Foldscopes in South Africa. The owner, Arista Burke, has a background in microbiology and education and believes that Foldscopes will be a gamechanger for South African schools. “For the first time, giving every child in SA access to a microscope is a real possibility. The schools that realize the potential of this tool are going to have a definite edge going forward”, says Arista. SciBuddy wants every school to have at least one set of Foldscopes. To make this possible, they are donating one kit to an underprivileged school for every 20 kits sold.  To find out more about SciBuddy and Foldscope, visit www.scibuddy.co.za or their Facebook page, SciBuddySA. 

Parenting Hub

The PROVES Method – the perfect strategy for mastering your matric mock exams

Matrics from the Class of 2018 should now be deep into preparing for their upcoming mock exams – which are only a few weeks away – and ultimately the final exams of their school careers in two months’ time. With only a handful of weeks left to revise, they now need to up the ante to ensure they get the best marks possible on their prelims. Doing so will enable them firstly to see which areas need more work before they write their finals, and will also ensure that they get the very best marks to allow them access to the higher education institution and qualification of their choice. “Learners now need to go beyond reading and re-reading their textbooks and notes, and employ a more holistic strategy which will position them to bring their very best to the exam room,” says Wonga Ntshinga, Senior Head of Programme: Faculty of ICT at The Independent Institute of Education, SA’s largest and most accredited private higher education institution. Ntshinga says that at this stage of the game, the PROVES method is a great approach to follow, as it helps to cement the academic work in the learner’s mind, while expanding understanding from different angles. Additionally, it gets learners in the right frame of mind, to withstand the anxiety and stress which can negatively impact performance. The PROVES method can be broken down as follows: PRACTISE by writing past papers or example questions rather than just reading. Most schools should make past papers available to their learners, but it is also a good idea to get ones in addition to those provided by your school. Good higher education institutions also help matric learners by providing past papers, so go visit a registered and accredited one in your area, and ask a student advisor to assist. As a bonus, the student advisor might even be able to talk through some of your concerns about the exams and your post-matric options, which will further help to mitigate any anxiety you may have. REFRESH by making sure you are eating, sleeping and exercising enough. Cramming into the early hours of the morning before an exam will leave you stressed, exhausted and unable to focus. It is important now to look after your physical and mental health as well as throwing your weight behind your books. Learners still have enough time to cover what they need to cover ahead of the exams, but then the plan needs to be put into motion right away, to avoid last-minute panic and the resultant impact on their physical wellbeing.   ORGANISE yourself, your time and your work. Having a neat working environment and a clear plan for what you need to do and study every day, as well as having the relevant materials sorted and on hand, will go a long way to reduce anxiety and optimise learning. Follow the plan closely but avoid spending hours every day on the plan rather than the implementation of the plan. Don’t allow yourself to feel overwhelmed, but focus on the small efforts – hour after hour, day after day – which, when compounded, will ultimately make a big impact. VISUALISE by using colour and mind maps and other strategies rather than just words, so that you can use more of your brain.   EXPLAIN by answering questions or telling friends or relatives about your work. It is not until you have tried to explain what you know that you can assess if you know enough to answer the questions.   SOCIAL MEDIA can be used as an academic tool to expand your understanding and grasp of your work. This can best be done by getting together a study group of equally dedicated and committed peers, and using the various platforms for specific purposes. Being part of a study group helps you track your progress, can quickly help you clarify your understanding of issues or set you on the right track if you have misunderstood something, and it also acts as an early warning system if you are falling behind.   The various channels and apps can be used as follows:   GOOGLE to find a wealth of online resources. From how to handle exam stress, to self-marking mock papers, study timetable templates and content/concept lists. Do a search for “Matric Exams 2018” which will provide many excellent results which can assist you in your preparation and motivation. A dedicated WHATSAPP study group enables discussion, last minute clarifications and sharing of notes. It is best to align study breaks within the group, and put your mobile on airplane mode while you’re hitting the books. When taking a break, connect with your peers via WhatsApp to share your understanding, successes and concerns. FACEBOOK groups for specific subjects is a great way to share materials and visuals, while enabling group discussions. When it’s time to take a break from the written word, go to YOUTUBE to find videos related to the content you are studying. Sometimes seeing something explained in video format will clarify things you just weren’t able to pin down while going through your textbooks. “The next few weeks and months are going to be taxing for learners preparing for their final exams, but by following a strict study strategy and doing what needs to be done every day – without allowing panic and procrastination to set in – there is still sufficient time even for learners who aren’t quite where they should be at the moment,” Ntshinga says. “And by incorporating this strategy into their approach right now, many learners will also find a new feeling of empowerment to take on the additional burden that higher education will bring.”

Advtech Group

Developing children’s EQ crucial for future success in rapidly changing world

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is increasingly becoming a greater determinant of future success across all spheres of life than IQ, an expert says, adding that it is more important than ever before that EQ is nurtured from a young age. “The introduction of social media into our lives as well as the lives of our children has created an environment where people are required to efficiently manage a variety of relationships simultaneously and successfully,” says Chris Van Niekerk, head at Founders Hill College, part of Africa’s largest private education provider, ADvTECH. He says the acquisition of knowledge, while obviously important, is less critical in the current information age, and that the emphasis for success has more to do with what can be done with the knowledge at hand. “This requires the ability to collaborate across gender divides, age gaps, cultural differences, and the like. A well-developed EQ will position a child well to positively engage 21st century challenges in adolescence and ultimately, adulthood.” Van Niekerk says that emotional intelligence can be defined as the ability to understand our own feelings, as well as the feelings of those around us. This includes concepts of self-awareness, empathy and dealing sensitively with other people. “In a world where we are required to manage a matrix of personal and professional relationships instantly and efficiently, the need to have a well-developed sense of self, alongside good empathetic social awareness is critical. It is widely accepted that IQ alone does not guarantee success in adulthood, in either the workplace or at home. “Our potential, and that of our children, will only come to fruition if our cognitive abilities are enhanced, complemented and communicated through a well-developed EQ which entails sound self-awareness as well as the awareness of the emotions of those around us.” Van Niekerk says that a well-developed EQ can, literally, be the deciding factor for success in adulthood. “This places an exciting, but onerous burden on us as parents and educators to ensure that our children are not only well versed in the Social, Natural and Commercial Sciences, among others, but also have the emotional savvy to manage their own feelings and behaviours, while being able to understand the feelings of others.” He advises parents who are serious about prioritising the EQ of their children to start incorporating strategies to develop it in their daily lives. There are a few practical ways in which to do this: Role model the behaviour that you expect in your children. Normalise talking about emotions. Acknowledge positive and negative emotions in your child. Teach your children that feelings and behaviour are in fact separable. Negative emotions do not have to lead to inappropriate behaviour. Keep your expectations, and subsequent guidance, age appropriate. Love them unconditionally. “The need for Emotional Intelligence is introduced naturally to our children from early cognition, when they learn ‘acceptable behaviour’, learn to manipulate others, and respond to their environment to get what they need, and more often, to get what they want,” says Van Niekerk. “The ‘how’ of introducing EQ to children is dependant on their emotional capacity, which is usually linked to their age. Six-year-olds, normatively, are able to follow basic instructions, can express their feelings, fears and problems, are reasonably self-sufficient and are able to compare themselves to their peers. With this specific ‘emotional skill set’ in mind, parents and teachers can get creative with exploring learning opportunities related to identifying and naming emotions, reflecting on the emotions that accompanied certain experiences during the day, as well as exploring different ways of expressing emotions.” Van Niekerk says it is widely accepted that people with well-developed emotional intelligence do better in the workplace than those of similar IQ, but who are less proficient in areas related to “people skills”. “This is true for the entire life cycle of our careers, from the entry point during the interviewing process, to ultimately fulfilling our professional potential later in our careers. Academic excellence is important and it matters in the workplace, however people drive workplace processes, and the degree of an individual’s success is reliant on combining these various skill sets. “Equally, in personal relationships, a realistic and well-grounded identity, coupled with positive feelings about our concept of self, create an ideal position for us to choose and enjoy fulfilling and healthy family and social lives as adults. And the best time to start this journey to personal success, is in a child’s early years.”

Parenting Hub

Mind the gap- why you should think twice before taking a year off after school

Matrics who are tempted to take a year off after their school careers – whether it is because they feel they just need a break, or because they don’t yet know if or what they want to study – should think twice about their decision, an education expert says. “There are significant implications to taking a so-called gap year instead of directly entering studies,” says Peter Kriel, General Manager at The Independent Institute of Education, SA’s largest private higher education provider. Chief among these, is the fact that graduates who went to study straight after school, and who completed their qualification within the required timeframe, are significantly better off than matriculants who elected to enter the workplace right away or who opted for a gap year, particularly if that gap year is unproductive. “A gap year doesn’t necessarily mean that you take off a year to travel the world and pretty much do nothing as the term was understood in the past. The concept has evolved to include other activities, such as getting a job after Matric to earn some money or gain work experience, or volunteering or even undergoing a structured programme,” says Kriel. However, while these options are still better than just relaxing for a year before entering studies, they may still put you behind your peers in terms of studying and earning potential, he says. Another risk with taking a gap year, is that one loses one’s “study muscles”, says Kriel. “It is completely understandable that the idea of getting away from the books after the demands of one’s final year at school is a very attractive idea for many. However after that year, getting back into the habit of studying and focusing on academics are major challenges which are best avoided.” But Kriel adds that there are ways to make a gap year work, which will lessen its impact on a person’s long-term success in the workplace. And obviously, where a young person is really not sure what they want to study, a gap year as long as it is productive is a better investment than a failed year of post-school study. “If you do decide to take a gap year, it is crucial that you at least do something to improve your skills and competencies during that time. A great option in this instance, is to do some distance or part-time courses.” This is a particularly attractive option for those Matriculants who are hesitant to sign up for a full degree straight away because they are still uncertain of what they want to do with their life. “Doing some short or distance courses allows you to investigate your options and interests without the financial and time commitments required of full-time degree study,” notes Kriel. “This means that you can get a better idea of where your passion and talents lie, while at the same time earning some certification that will make your gap year less of a ‘hole’ in your CV. “And finally, staying with the books, even without the commitment of having to study full-time and the ability to study at your own pace, means that you keep your brain working and geared for when you do sign up for full qualification study later.” It is important to also note that some higher education institutions will not keep your “offer” warm for you, so if you get in to the qualification of your dreams it is rarely prudent to delay taking up the place, says Kriel. “But for those who have legitimate reasons for not going straight into further studies, our advice is definitely to ensure that you don’t lose sight of the long game, and that you keep learning even if you are already earning.” Kriel says the time should also be used to actively investigate future study options to limit time-wasting later. “Look at all the higher education institutions, whether it be a public university or private, and their offerings. Find a qualification that will make you employable – one that is recognised by employers and has a curriculum that is relevant in the workplace of today. “You must also choose an institution whose curricula and learning processes enable you to master work-ready skills so that you have a competitive ‘hit the ground running’ advantage. Having a portfolio of work at graduation, for example, allows you to instantly showcase what you have learnt and what makes you an attractive prospect to potential employers. “Finally, you must choose an institution that will give you the best possible chance of succeeding and completing your qualification in the minimum time. Every additional year of study leaves a long-term financial impact, so consider things such as student support, class sizes, and the quality of lecturing and facilities.”

Parenting Hub

Homework or no Homework for South African schools?

The paradigm around learning in South Africa is changing rapidly. If, like most parents of this generation, you grew up with homework, then this might not seem like such a big deal. However, schools around the world, including South Africa, are changing their views on homework. This is largely thanks to the revolutionary approach to education that Finland has adopted – with stunning results. Where did it all start? The Finnish Phenomenon In 2006 the Programme for International Student Assessment (PISA) conducted a survey of 15-year-olds’ academic skills from 57 nations. Finland placed first in science by a whopping 5% margin, and dropped a bomb in the world’s schooling narrative.  Here is what’s so different about Finland’s preschools and primary schools: Preschool is not academically focused in any way but focuses more on play, fostering healthy socialising, increasing independence, and growing maturity. Children don’t start school until they are seven years old.  They have less homework than their peers in other countries – at most a half an hour a day, which is often completed during school anyway. There are no private schools in Finland, so children from wealthy and middle- to low-income homes melt together. This also means better schools all round, as the whole neighbourhood is invested in making the local schools of a high standard for everyone. Finland determined that education is the way to climb out of their economic hole. Education became more than just another point on a child’s long to-do list; it became a beacon for the future of an entire country’s success. There is only one standardised test, which is administered in the final year of high school. At many schools, teachers don’t grade students until the fifth grade, and teachers aren’t forced to organise curriculum around standardised testing. After ninth grade, students attend either an academic program (53%) or vocational one (47%) — this flexibility results in a 96% graduation rate, dwarfing South Africa’s cohort pass rate of 39.25%. Finally, play constitutes a significant part of individual growth and learning in Finnish schools. Every class must be followed by a 15-minute recess break so children can spend time outside on their own activities to ‘reset’ their minds.  What about South Africa? We hear people argue that, because South Africa is bigger, more diverse, and more unequal, it’s harder to reach higher quality education. However, there are some shining examples of what we can accomplish when our public and private schools start embracing change. In 2015, Gavin Keller – principal of Sun Valley Primary and CEO of The Sun Valley Group of Schools – implemented a no-homework policy for their primary school and up to Grade 9 in their high school, assigning learners 20 minutes’ reading time a day instead. Keller says. “When we started assessing our school, what became very clear was that school is a high-stress, anxiety-based environment and children have no time to be innovative and creative. They need nine hours of sleep and their school day is six-and-a-half hours long, so there’s no time to play – and play drives creativity.’ They’ve since seen improved academic results, increased motivation and a significant increase in reading. “Schools are changing how they approach learning,” says Janine Hammond, MD of Sherpa Kids Western Cape, an aftercare and holiday care solutions provider for many preschools and primary schools in the Western Cape, “and it’s time that aftercare is considered in the same light as well. Most of our children will go into jobs that don’t currently exists. They need problem solving skills, time management, and programs that stimulate intellectual capacity building. This does not happen by accident, but through careful, thoughtful education and aftercare systems that are based on sound parenting principles like routine, discipline, boundaries, and reward.” “We’ve seen the benefits of play for learning,” says Janine. “We need to remember that what happens after the school day is as important as what happens during the school day. It truly does ‘take a village’ to raise a child, so the aftercare team needs to be the ‘fresh legs’ so desperately needed to constructively support our children during the second half of the school day.” Sinai Academy in Bloubergrant – a private school that uses the South African CAPS curriculum – has long since adopted the approach of independent learning. “Students are self directed and become lifelong learners,” says the school. Students are given the month’s curriculum at the start of the month, and then each learner can choose what they’d like to complete and by when, as long as all of it is completed by month’s end. This allows them to energetically complete their favourite things, before tackling the more difficult lessons. This fosters a love for learning, and allows more time for play. What can I do as a Parent? If you child’s school does insist on homework, here are some great tips from Janine Hammond of Sherpa Kids on how to manage homework with success: Do homework early in the afternoon – right after lunch if possible – while your child’s minds is still fresh. This also allows them to close the ‘school day’ file in their minds, and releases them to exhale into their afternoon’s fun activities.  If you can only help your child with homework when you come home from work, try not to do it directly before bed time. Studies show that children need to wind down before bed in order to sleep well. A good night’s sleep means better memory capabilities, which means a brighter, happier child. So after homework, allow a little play time, then read a story in bed, then it is lights out. If your child does go to an aftercare, find out if they include structured time that allows your child to learn independently (not provide another teaching lesson, but also not abandon them to attempt the tasks alone), and that facilitators are available to guide and support your child in their homework, and in play. Most schools in the Western

Parenting Hub

Depression & How Parents can help their Children

Teenagers are known for their moody natures. Adolescence brings with it so many changes for a child embarking on the journey to adulthood – hormones, academic pressures, physical developments, questions about their identity and place in the world, and social pressures, particularly among peers. But mental health specialists have found that there is a point when teen moodiness is more than what it seems, and that depression in youth is a real problem. How to Identify Depression in Teenagers Being subjected to bad moods and periods of rebelliousness is a norm for parents of teenagers. However, there are signs and symptoms that parents can look out for that will help them identify depression in their children, so that early intervention can take place. Depression is an all- encompassing illness, where emotions like sadness, anger, and despair are so overwhelming it becomes difficult to function normally in society. What a parent is likely to see when teenager is depressed, includes lethargy, school grades going down, substance abuse, addiction to social media/internet, low self-esteem, violence, and behaviour that poses a threat to themselves and others. A depressed teen might talk often of running away, or romanticise suicidal thoughts, and they will show a marked change in their eating and sleeping patterns as well. How You can Help Often a parent will feel inadequate when it comes to helping their depressed child, most times feeling rather overwhelmed themselves. But there are ways in which your support as a parent can make a huge difference. In Catherine Radloff’s article about supporting a depressed teenager, she outlines various ways in which parents can have a positive influence in their child’s struggle with depression, and several studies have shown that the support from family in properly managing mental illness can greatly reduce the depth of depressive episodes, as well as the frequency with which they occur. Below are a few ways parents can help their depressed teenager: Seek Professional Help Don’t put off contacting a mental health professional if you think your teen may be suffering from depression. These specialists are trained to diagnose the condition no matter the age of the patient, and come with expert knowledge that will serve as a much-needed support for parents who have to help their child through this challenging time. Encourage Socialising Depressed teens will seek solitude, but too much time spent alone with their own dark thoughts can be very damaging. Encourage social interaction on a personal level – social media doesn’t count – and this will help eradicate feelings of isolation. Get Them Moving Regular physical activity has been proven to alleviate symptoms of depression, and by adopting a good exercise regime, your teen will be taking the right steps to managing their condition in a healthy way. Monitor all Medication If your child is under the care of a specialist in mental health and their condition calls for it, they will be prescribed anti-depressants to help them manage their condition. It’s important for parents to make sure the child takes the medication on time and in the correct doses. Listening goes a Long Way Teenagers with depression often feel isolated and misunderstood. These feelings cause them to withdraw from people, and even lead to very dark thoughts about leaving this world altogether. It’s vital that parents keep open line of communication with their child. Assure them that it’s safe to share their feelings, and also that you are willing to listen without judgement. Never dismiss what they think and how they feel, as this could be detrimental to their state of mind. Routine & Diet Depression and anxiety often go hand-in- hand, and a stable, predictable routine is one way of reducing symptoms of anxiety. For instance, your child may have trouble sleeping, but will find comfort in a fixed bed time. Loss of appetite is common in depressed teens, but although they might not be eating well, ensure that they have a healthy selection of foods available. Balanced nutrition plays a key role in keeping the mind and body feeling their best. Professional Treatment ZwavelStream Clinic is a private psychiatric institution that provides patients with a tranquil space to achieve mental wellness. Our team of mental health specialists bring decades of experience and skills to their approach, prioritising the recovery and treatment of each patient as an individual. If you suspect that you or someone you know might be having mental health issues, feel free to do our online self-diagnosis questionnaire to find out if psychiatric intervention is necessary. All results will be treated with the utmost confidentiality. Alternatively, you can visit our website to find out more about what we offer, and how we can help you or your loved one.

Parenting Hub

Ways to cope with generation me, me, me

By: Justin Kistan, Crawford College North Coast If we’re lucky, we’ve been told our whole lives that we’re special. Our parents said it to us, our friends, and even our teachers. And we are special? To them. To the world at large? Not so much. Don’t get me wrong. You are unique without a doubt. Your environment and experiences have carved you into something inimitable. Only you can do, what you can do. But is that special yet? Constant positive reinforcement is important in building our self-esteem. Too much of it though can make us a little entitled. Hey, if I’ve been told that I’m special my whole life, surely I deserve good things?! Don’t I deserve the accolades, awards, and applause? Maybe. But have we earned them? We want the standing ovation but have we delivered on the performance? Popular culture perpetuates this today. It’s all about me. I deserve all good things just for being the awesome individual that I am. It’s called a selfie for a reason. It’s you framing yourself as the centre of your own little world. Now imagine a child living in this world. Can you blame them today for being vain, egotistical and self-centred?     Unwarranted self-esteem can lead to an entitlement which can lead to narcissism. Our EGO (unhealthy belief in our own importance) gets so big that it becomes a stumbling block on our path to real growth and development. Hedonic adaptation is also to blame. We very quickly get used to all the good things in our lives and therefore go looking for our next happiness ‘fix’, either from buying something new or basking in the attention of others through Instagram, twitter or negative behaviour. How can we fix this?  Kids can learn to: Apply the meta-skill of the 21st Century, SELF-AWARENESS, which is the ability to see ourselves for who we are, appreciate how others see us and to begin to understand our place in the world. Self-awareness removes the blinkers from our eyes and allows us the vision to accurately tune into our current station in life. We will never get to where we want to go in the future if we don’t know where we are now.  Practise GRATITUDE. Gratitude is the antidote to entitlement. It reminds us to appreciate what we already have and fosters greater happiness and empathy while discouraging depression, anxiety and envy. No more FOMO. Keeping a gratitude journal is a good way to start. Just write down three things (big or small) that you’re grateful for every day and you’ll start to feel the positive results soon.   Deep introspection and appreciation can spur inspired action that will earn authentic admiration.  Through their actions and interactions, children can learn to pause, ponder and then perform. Insight before Foresight. They will build their competence and with that, they will earn their confidence. Remember: Special is not who I am, it is what I’ll become. I will learn and earn it.

Parenting Hub

NQF explained: What prospective students should know before they sign up

Terminology related to education in South Africa can often be very confusing, particularly when learners and prospective students need to consider the National Qualifications Framework (NQF) and talk of accreditation and registration. It is however very important that prospective students get to grips with the terminology, as not doing so can have serious implications down the line, an education expert says. Dr Felicity Coughlan, Director of The Independent Institute of Education, SA’s largest private higher education provider, says one of the most important aims of the NQF is to protect the general public from abuse by bogus education providers.  She also says that by developing an understanding of the NQF, you can make assumptions about registration and accreditation, which makes it all much easier to understand because a qualification that is not registered or accredited is not on the NQF, so it really is your shortcut to working out what is real and what is not. “South Africa has a register of all qualifications which is managed by the South African Qualifications Authority (SAQA), and this register is referred to as the NQF,” she explains. “We are fortunate in South Africa to have some really strict rules that educational institutions and training providers have to adhere to, so if you want to study there are a few simple questions to ask to which there are very clear answers.  If an institution is not clear with you on the answers, the chances are you should be cautious about registering.” Coughlan says that something can only be called a “qualification” if: 1)     It has a credit value of 120 as a minimum, and 2)     is registered on the NQF with an NQF ID (sometimes called a SAQA ID) number. “The shortest possible qualification is therefore normally one year as it takes about a year of study to do 120 credits.  A degree is normally at least 360 credits and so on. Without these two being in place, what you are studying is considered a short course and not a qualification, so it cannot be called a diploma or degree.  So, if a South African institution is offering you a diploma for three weeks of study, it is not legitimate and warning lights should start flashing about that institution.” Coughlan adds that if an education institution cannot provide a prospective student with a programme’s NQF ID, caution should be exercised as it is then not a South African qualification. However, even when an institution does provide an NQF ID, one should still verify it independently by searching for it on http://regqs.saqa.org.za/ . “Look up the qualification and check its level and credit value, as well as information about what it covers. You can then compare that information to the marketing material given to you by the training provider to make sure that the promises and reality match.” Coughlan says that qualifications will only get registered on the NQF if they have been checked for quality and accredited by the Quality Council with the statutory responsibility for doing this. South Africa has three of these Quality Councils, she explains. 1)     Umalusi is responsible for “school level” qualifications which are on the first four levels of the NQF – Levels 1 to 4. 2)     The Council on Higher Education (CHE) is responsible for higher education (post- secondary school) qualifications which are the ones on level 5 to 10 offered by registered private higher education institutions and public Universities. 3)     The QCTO (Quality Council for Trades and Occupations) manages vocational training and education from Level 1 through to level 6.  The level overlaps with Umalusi and the CHE, but the area of focus is very much the trades and occupations, from plumbing through to being a chef or even some areas of accounting.  These colleges are called TVET – Technical Vocational Education and Training Colleges.  (In the past called FET (Further Education and Training) Colleges. Coughlan says the level on the NQF gives one an indication of how complicated the subject matter is.  Level 10 is where Doctorates are pitched, for instance, while Level 4 is the level of Grade 12. “Only registered private and public institutions can offer qualifications that are on the NQF, while both private and public institutions can offer on all levels and through approval from all the Quality Councils.  This means that the only difference between public (University) institutions and private higher education institutions – which may as a result of regulations not refer to themselves as private universities – is that the public institutions get some subsidy from the government while the private institutions don’t.” Coughlan says when one has a clear understanding of the NQF, that information will assist you in deciding what to study and where. “If, for instance, you want to follow a trade or vocation such as becoming a Chef, you need to find a college (public or private) accredited by the QCTO and registered as a private or public TVET College with a qualification on the NQF. “If however you want to pursue a higher education qualification such as a Higher Certificate, Degree or Diploma, you can investigate your options among any of the country’s 26 public Universities or 116 registered private higher education institutions. “As always, it is crucial for prospective students to thoroughly investigate all their options, to ensure they find the best fit for themselves in terms of location, campus, and offering.” * Prospective students can find a complete list of all registered private colleges and higher education institutions at: www.dhet.gov.za/SitePages/DocRegisters.aspx . ** GRAPHIC: NQF level breakdown Sub Framework   NQF level Qualification types General and Further Education and Training Qualifications Sub Framework (GFETQSF) Occupational Qualifications Sub Framework (OQSF) 1 Grade 9 2 Grade 10/ National (vocational) Certificates level 2/ Occupational Certificates 3 Grade 11/ National (vocational) Certificates level 3/ Occupational Certificates 4 Grade 12/ National (vocational) Certificates level 4/ Occupational Certificates Higher Education Qualification Sub Framework (HEQSF) 5 Higher Certificate/ Advanced National (vocational) Certificates/ Occupational Certificates 6 Diploma/ Advanced Certificate/

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What to consider when searching for a school

By Yandiswa Xhakaza Choosing a school is no small feat. Parents often undertake this task under enormous pressure and in a hurry to find a school on their way to or from work. However, I would urge parents to invest more time in finding the right school for their child because, while convenience is often the driving force, it’s important to remember that your child is potentially going to be in that space for up to 12 hours nearly every day. As such, the environment must be conducive for your child to feel secure, to be happy and to thrive.  Below are a few practical things that all parents should look for when in search of a good school. While these are biased towards pre-school and primary school, many of these considerations can also be applied to high school.  The school environment and general aura of fun, excitement and vibrancy. Look for colour, flowers, trees, jungle gyms and outdoor play equipment. You should get a sense of security, love and warmth. Classroom design and layout is a big indicator of whether the school offers a forward-thinking, 21st century approach. Look for learning stations with different learning activities in each station, as well as the availability of appropriate educational toys that incorporate sensorial skills, fine and gross motor skills, etc. In a pre-school environment, look for the dramatic play area, big wooden blocks, a reading corner etc. Classrooms that still force all children to strictly sit at a desk for more than 8 hours a day are concerning, so look for beanbags, couches, benches, comfortable carpets, balance balls etc. This not provides variety, it also allows children to learn in the ways/positions that they are most comfortable in. Wi-fi powered schools are no longer those with a computer room and designated computer classes once or twice a week. Schools that are innovative and digitally advanced are easy to spot. Look for visible gadgets inside the classroom, including laptops/tablets, headphones, white boards, projectors etc. Digital learning shouldn’t happen in isolation, it should be infused with day-to-day learning. Child happiness is the most genuine measure, so listen for the buzz of laughter and look for happy smiles. Well mannered and polite children who greet and make way for you to pass is symbolic of the school culture. A great set of extra-curricular activities that children can choose from speaks directly to whole child development. Consider how the school harnesses all aspects of the child, not just academic ability. Effective teacher-parent communication that happens on a regular basis regarding the work being covered at school that week, fun activities that took place in class, occasional photos of the children, classroom messages etc. Find out how parents are engaged so that they feel like they are part of the learning experience. A diverse team of dynamic and passionate teachers always makes for a great school. The school can have state of the art facilities and resources, but without amazing teachers who inspire children and make them feel like they are doing an incredible job, then it’s all for nothing. Teachers can make or break a school, so be sure to meet the educators.

Parenting Hub

Matrics: use the calm before the storm to get your study options sorted

With the holidays almost over and preliminary exams on the horizon, Grade 12s are on the cusp of entering one of the most stressful periods in their school careers. The relatively calm few weeks they still have ahead of them should therefore be used to plan their post-school options, which will free up their physical and emotional energy so that they can wholly focus on doing their best in their final exams. “Deciding what to study and where to study can be hugely stressful, particularly when you don’t have a clear idea of what you want to do with your life, which is the case for many thousands of learners,” says Natasha Madhav, Senior Head of Programme: Faculty of ICT at The Independent Institute of Education, SA’s largest private higher education provider. “It is therefore important that learners don’t add this burden of anxiety when trying to prepare for exams. This can be avoided by taking the time right now to investigate their options and, ideally, already submitting their applications for the qualifications and institutions of their choice,” she says. She says the most important advice she has for prospective students, given the difficult economic climate and associated challenges of finding suitable employment after graduation, is to look at qualifications and institutions that will prepare them for a specific career and the world of work. Additionally, they should ideally line up at least one or two additional options, as they may find their circumstances and preferences having changed by the end of the year. “The worst courses of action, are to sign up for an arbitrary qualification with no real understanding of how you can leverage it post-graduation, spending valuable time and money on something that may not lead to a career, or following your friends’ lead because you are not clear on your own aspirations,” she says. Madhav says learners who don’t know what to study, should consider what kind of work they would find interesting, and then work backwards to determine a suitable qualification. “It is also worth remembering that there are literally new fields and careers opening up every year – things that your teachers, parents and friends may not even have heard about,” she says. “So don’t settle on a university and then only investigate what they offer in terms of qualifications. Do it the other way around – determine what you would like to do, determine what qualification would enable you to do that, and then find out which institutions offer that.” If, for instance, a learner is interested in Game Design, it makes sense to find an institution that offers that qualification rather than doing a generic 3-year degree and then attempting to break into the industry thereafter. Or if they are interested in brand management, to determine the best place where they can study this, rather than doing a general business undergraduate degree. The same principle goes for a host of other career-focused fields, such as copywriting and communications, digital design and marketing, IT and networking qualifications, and business qualifications. “The world of work is rapidly evolving, and to be competitive in the job market, candidates must try and match their qualification as closely as possible to the work they would want to do one day,” says Madhav. “Making that determination takes time and clarity of thought in the face of all the options out there, which is why Matrics should make the best of the few weeks of grace they have left and get their future plans sorted now.”

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Bullying: What parents and schools can do

ARTICLE BY PROF RITA NIEMANN, NALIZE MARAIS, ZENDRÉ SWANEPOEL AND MONIERA MOOSA Bullying is a great concern for both parents and schools. Here we outline a number of measures that can help them both parties deal with bullying. Parents When parents notice that their child is behaving differently – not wanting to go to school, using illness as an excuse, suddenly performing poorly at school or enuresis – and suspect bullying, they need to act immediately. Firstly, they must determine where this is happing (at school, at a sports club, on social media, etc.) and who the perpetrator(s) are. Secondly, if the bullying is taking place in an organised environment such as at school or sports club, the authorities need to be informed and requested to step in. They are legally bound to protect the rights of the child. Thirdly, parents have the responsibility to equip their children to cope by: Instilling the knowledge that children must take a stand and that they have a choice in allowing someone else to victimise them. Assisting children to terminate relationships that are potentially harmful, such as blocking a person on social media. Helping them to identify bullies and the different forms of bullying. Creating a safe space for children to speak about what is happening to them. Emphasising assertive verbal communication if threatened. Building children’s self-concept. Getting the help of a psychologist, if necessary, to counsel the victim. Emphasising that respectful behaviour is always the best option and thus preventing retaliation. Fostering problem-solving and conflict resolution skills with the focus on restoring damaged relationships. Working collaboratively to solve the problem with their children so that they can feel reassured. Schools As bullying is a deliberate act to hurt someone, there must be consequences for the bully. Once teachers are aware that a bullying incident has taken place at school, the matter must be dealt with by: Asking the victim to provide the names of the perpetrator(s), as well as the names of friends of the victim, as soon as he/she has calmed down. Counselling the victim and finding out whether he/she has been injured and what effect the bullying or harassment has had on him or her. Cultivating a “no blame” approach towards bullying or harassment. Establishing punitive sanctions for both the bully and for any bystanders. Developing a bullying code of conduct/bullying policy and informing learners of this. Having designated teachers to deal with incidents of bullying. Facilitating mediation and discussions with the victim and the bully, depending on the severity of the bullying. Passing the responsibility to the bully or group of bullies to make sure that the problem is solved. Ensuring that potential bystanders understand that they have a vital role to play during bullying incidents. Letting the victims feel protected after they have reported the incident. Encouraging learners to make suggestions on how they can contribute to alleviating the negative experiences of the victim. Scheduling follow-up meetings to monitor the situation where each party has to share how things are going. Informing the parents of both the bully and the victim about the incident/s. The principal and teachers have a crucial role to play in directing learners towards becoming responsible citizens. They should create a safe and secure environment, establish a non-violent culture, and be good role models for all learners. Reference Niemann, R., Marais, N., Swanepoel, Z. & Moosa, M. 2016. Problem areas in schools In: Jacobs, M. Teaching-learning Dynamics, Johannesburg: Pearsons

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