Health - Parenting Hub

Expert Advice from Bonitas Medical Fund

Advice from the experts

Food Affects Behaviour

‘You don’t have to like it, you only have to eat it!’ In my previous book ‘Raising Happy, Healthy Children’ I covered diet extensively with the help of a clinical nutritionist, Sally Ann Creed, with whom the book was co-written. However, I think it is important to reiterate that what we eat affects the way we behave. The two go hand in hand. You cannot discipline a child who is being fed incorrectly, and conversely, you cannot enforce healthy eating if you have no discipline in place. Feeding a child sugar and expecting them to sit still is like expecting an intoxicated person to walk a straight line. We would all agree that alcohol affects our brain, but some people struggle to accept that food, also, can affect our brain, responses and general well being. If malnutrition makes you ill, why would the opposite not be true? Some foods can also affect behaviour and hormone functions in teenage years. Mood swings, aggression, loss of concentration, passivity, irregular or severely painful menstrual cycle, bad skin, memory loss and other problems can all be connected to a food in- tolerance or deficiency of some sort. It would be wise to check this out with your doctor or a nutritionist that you trust. I read a bumper sticker that said, ‘If you ignore your health, it will go away.’ This is so true. Sometimes people say to me, ‘Well, I do not eat vegetables and look at me, I’m fine!’ To which I respond, that sounds like saying, “I do not have to service my car. It is running just fine.”But when it has a costly breakdown that could have been prevented with a simple timely service, you regret it. We need to train our children in healthy eating habits so that as adults they will not be picky eaters but rather enjoy the full spectrum of fruits, vegetables, proteins and other foods that are freely available today. If you do not teach this, who will? To sum up, studies show that a healthy diet consists of three meals per day and two snacks. Each meal should contain a healthy form of protein. Here is a suggestion of a healthy routine for the whole family (the portion size is adjusted accordingly): Breakfast: Cooked oats, sorghum, quinoa or millet porridge (not the instant kind). For variations with the porridge add cinnamon, cashews, almonds, grated apple, banana, local honey, organic coconut oil or combinations of these. Adding raw cacao can also quickly turn it into a special chocolate breakfast. Keep in mind that grains are best absorbed by the body when they have been soaked, preferably for anywhere from 1-12 hours. This ‘increases digestibility, and eliminates phytic acid’ according to Integrative Nutrition. You can make the porridge by pouring boiling water over it and leaving it overnight to soak, and just topping up with boiling water in the morning to heat it up. Or for a faster option, you could just pour the boiling water over your porridge in the morning, cover it, and it’ll be ready in three minutes (that’s right, you don’t need the microwave or stove). For an incredibly delicious special treat, add egg yolks into hot porridge (first stir some hot porridge into the beaten egg yolks before adding to the hot porridge). Then beat egg whites till stiff and fold in gently. Serve with cinnamon and xylitol. Another breakfast option would be any variety of free-range eggs with whole grain bread if you wish (don’t be fooled by multi-grain; whole grain ingredients should be the first on the ingredient list if you have bread) and/or tomatoes, mushrooms, sautéed onions, peppers, etc. Mid-morning: Variety of fruit, nuts and seeds (not peanuts), plain full cream yoghurt (flavoured and/or sweetened yoghurts can do more harm than good, even the probiotics in them could become ineffective because of the sugar content); or Cracker breads with any nut butter (almond, cashew) or cream cheese; Green smoothies. Blend at least three organic kale leaves (or spinach, or any type of leafy green) with filtered water (this helps to blend it to a smooth consistency, rather than having bits of greens to chew). You get more benefits from leafy greens when they are blended. You could also add chia seeds and/or raw oats at this point to be ground up. The nyou can add banana (frozen makes for a more frothy smoothie) and any combination of these and other ingredients: nut butter, cacao, berries (again, can be frozen), nuts, coconut oil, carrot, raw beetroot (don’t judge it until you try it – it’s a pleasant surprise), maca, pear, etc. Try to have more vegetable than fruit where possible, just adding the fruit for some sweetness. If your children prefer a sweeter taste, you could add a touch of local honey (which can help with seasonal allergies) or xylitol. You can also blend in ice if you like a more frothy smoothie. Lunch: Half of the plate should be filled with a variety of vegetables (raw/ steamed/roasted). A quarter of the plate with a healthy carbohydrate (e.g. quinoa, sweet potato, basmati or brown rice, healthy pasta, whole grain bread, etc). It’s better if you can include complex carbohydrates, as oppose to simple. A quarter of the plate with protein (lentils, fish, red meat, chicken, eggs, beans, etc). At least 10-20% of your food needs to consist of healthy fats (coconut oil, olive oil, oily fish, avocado, nuts, etc). Mid-afternoon: Crudités with a protein (hummus, white cheese, cream cheese, cottage cheese, meat, fish, lentils, red kidney beans). You could try making this more appealing by creating a pattern or picture out of the food. Supper: Same make-up as lunch, but try to make something different so that you’re not serving the same thing on one day. You could, however, keep some dinner as leftovers for lunch the next day. It’s always more convenient for families if you can cook once, eat twice. This would typically happen around 8 am, 10

September 8, 2014

First Aid For The Common Cold

At this time of the year, every second person either has one or is getting over one. Firstly how do you know it is just a common old cold and not the flu? Symptoms of a cold are: Sore throat, runny nose or congestion, sneezing and mild or no fever. Should these symptoms develop into moderate to high fever with bodily aches and pains, you’re probably looking at flu. What to do? At the first signs of a cold (usually tingling in the nose, a scratchy throat and smarting eyes), start taking a supplementing of buffered vitamin C with bioflavonoids (preferably not ascorbic acid) at a dose of 1g every 30 minutes. You should be feeling a lot better after the third dose however continue at this high dose for the first day, till bowel tolerance is reached and stools become loose, then cut back on the dosage. For the next few days take 1g at least 3 times a day until you feel you have recovered completely. Zinc supplements have been shown to significantly reduce the severity of cold symptoms, as well as the length of the illness, but try to start within 24 hours of the onset of common cold symptoms. Take a 30mg capsule every 2 hours or suck zinc lozenges. Supplements of garlic extract may also reduce the days you suffer. Studies have reported significant improvements for the number of symptoms, the number of days and incidences that people felt under the weather, as well as a decrease in days missed at work. Raw, fresh garlic works better than cooked but the downside to fresh garlic is that the breath odour can stay as long as 2 days, so it is not appropriate to those who are in close contact with others. In this case take a supplement that leaves no odour on the breath. Timing is key so these supplements need to be on hand in your first aid cabinet to use as soon as cold symptoms manifest. What else can you do? Stay hydrated! Proper hydration allows for efficient transmission of your body’s most critical communications and helps eliminate toxins and foreign invaders so you can clear infections more efficiently. Pure water is of course the best hydrator. Get proper sleep. A deep, restorative sleep cycle is fundamental to your body’s repair process and supporting your immune system. A number of studies have demonstrated that failing to get enough sleep has numerous consequences for physical, mental and emotional health. Also don’t forget to take vitamin D daily, especially in winter when most of get almost no sunshine. Recurrent colds may just be due to a vitamin D deficiency. You probably need to take at least 4000IU vitamin D per day in Winter. Is the flu vaccine really necessary? A major review of flu vaccines appeared in the prestigious journal Lancet in which the author screened a massive 5 700 articles and found only 31 studies worthy of inclusion. The author, Professor Michael Osterholm, like many other researchers, concluded that there was only good evidence for a moderate efficacy in healthy adults, and no real evidence of protection in those over 65 years, or in children. This is a pity because the fact is that most healthy adults don’t die from the flu, and the ones that could do with the protection are the elderly and young children. Numerous studies are showing that everyone would be much better off taking vitamin D in high doses. This is safer than the flu vaccine and does not have any side-effects. Vitamin D does not kill the flu virus; it simply improves the resistance of the body to all viral infections.

September 4, 2014

‘White Gold’ – Help Decrease Infant Mortality

In South Africa, one premature infant dies every 20 minutes. In the fight against this unnecessary loss of life, International Breastfeeding Week is calling on mothers to breastfeed their babies and donate breastmilk to help decreasing infant mortality and malnutrition. The South African Breastmilk Reserve (SABR), currently the largest human-milk-banking partner of the South African Department of Health, warns that breastfeeding rates in South Africa are dangerously low with only 7,2% of South African women breastfeeding. These low rates result in the loss of the most vulnerable members of our society, including 20,000 babies under 1,8kg and 70,000 babies under 5kg annually. The International Baby Food Action Network (IBFAN) of Africa credits breastfeeding as the single biggest influence on decreasing infant mortality and malnutrition, especially in the least developed countries of Africa. Based on this core belief, SABR is urging mothers to breastfeed their own babies for at least the first six months of their lives, to ensure optimum growth and development. “We believe that breastfeeding, access to mothers-own-milk, donated breastmilk and education are the keys to unlocking infant survival”, says Stasha Jordan, breastfeeding activist and executive director at SABR. “We are calling on all mothers to donate breastmilk at local breastmilk-banks to ensure that the young lives that do not have access to their mothers’ breastmilk get the best chance of a healthy start to life. Not just during International Breastfeeding Week but on an ongoing basis. Whilst International Breast-feeding Week reminds us of the importance of ‘promoting, protecting and supporting breast-feeding’ we should live every day to ’empower inspire and counsel’ mothers and communities in breastfeeding and ‘baby-friendly’ care for the most vulnerable. Educating mothers living in poverty and with HIV and AIDS about safe infant feeding practices is also a key focus for the SABR, to ultimately avoid vertical transmission (from mother to baby) of HIV and AIDS. “We invite mothers with babies to visit our milk-banks across the country to learn more about home-methods for heat treatment of breastmilk and through this, promote food security in a continent where poverty and malnutrition are rampant,” says Jordan. In the previous financial year, the SABR had 889 donors and supplied breastmilk to 1295 infants, which contributed to saving an average of 5,000 premature infants from infection and mortality associated with lack of breastfeeding, since its inception in 2003. “Health care professionals and mothers are becoming increasingly sensitised to the importance of the use of breastmilk in perinatal care, which is in turn increasing the need for more breastmilk-banks across the country,” says Jordan. In realising the value this ‘white gold’ holds, the SABR, in partnership with the Free State Department of Health, has recently expanded human-milk-banking to a further four provincial hospitals, bringing the countrywide total 44 human-breastmilk-bank facilities. “Despite great success over the past ten years, the lives that need to be saved remain many, says Jordan. “We have a mammoth task ahead of us to turn around infant mortality rates in Africa, therefore we need the support from the breastfeeding community to help drive the change toward higher breastfeeding rates and ultimately lower infant mortality.” In reducing premature infant mortality rates, over-stretched hospitals also save millions of Rands annually, which advances the healthcare of the entire nation over the long run. To get involved and alleviate the challenges faced by the SABR, including low breastfeeding rates in South Africa, sourcing donor mothers when so many women are HIV positive, and funding for the operation of the milk-banks, please visit www.sabr.org.za or call 011 482 1920 or e-mail: [email protected]. About South African Breastmilk Reserve The South African Breastmilk Reserve (SABR) was founded in 2003 as the first registered human-milk-bank in South Africa. The main objective of the SABR is to facilitate the establishment of human-milk-banks in as many communities as possible, with the aim of providing human milk (and the necessary equipment and funding) to babies in need, particularly babies orphaned as a result of AIDS. Today the SABR supplies in excess of 60 hospitals and is constantly working to gain favour for human milk banking in these hospitals, including: Bloemfontein Universitas, Bloemfontein Pelonomi; Boitumelo Hospital; Bongani Hospital, Dihlabeng Hospital; Edenvale (cnr); Kalafong Hospital; Kimberley Hospital; Manapo Hospital; Netcare Alberlito (cnr); Netcare Blaauwberg; Netcare Cuyler PE; Netcare Femina; Netcare Kuils River (cnr); Netcare Olivedale; Netcare Parklane; Netcare Parklands; Netcare St Augustine’s (cnr); Netcare The Bay; Newcastle Provincial H; Northdale (cnr); Pietermaritzburg H Complex; Potchefstroom Hospital; SABR Head Office; Sandton MediClinic; Tembisa Hospital; Witbank Hospital.

September 2, 2014

Why go for rice cereal when we have so many other delicious options?

Honestly, as a Mom and dietitian there is no reason to start food introductions with rice cereal. Rice cereal has been a long-time staple of the food introduction folklore, but there is no science or even practical reasoning behind it. Rice cereal has very little nutritional value. It is starchy, full of carbohydrates with little to no protein or fat and very few vitamins and minerals. Even the iron that is added to most brands is very poorly absorbed and frequently contributes to constipation. And that whole “add rice cereal to the bottle to make them sleep through the night” idea? Sorry, it’s a myth. Why go for rice cereal when we have so many other delicious options? Here are some ideas for the different age groups: 4-6 months, pureed food (the Allergy society recommends to wait until at least 4-6 months before introducing solid foods. I strongly agree. There is no downside to waiting past 4 months, as mothers milk is by far the best and most nutritious food.) Avocado (a great first food! Full of healthy fats, mild in flavour) Carrots (add a drizzle of olive oil to increase the calories) Sweet potato Hubbard squash/butternut/pumpkin (mixed with a little cinnamon – yum!) Pear Banana Apple Mango 6-9 months, pureed food, start small finger food Berries (except strawberries, which can be allergenic – wait until 12+ months to introduce those) Broccoli, kale, chard and other “brassica” family vegetables Cucumbers Yogurt Cream cheese Poultry (even though it’s expensive, organic is really the best) Ostrich or venison Lamb Pork Egg Nut butters Beans and lentils (mixed with some chicken stock – yummy!) Sunflower and pumpkin seed butter (thinned) Grains like oats, rice, quinoa, buckwheat Blackstrap molasses (you can add a little to just about everything to increase iron and calcium) 7-12 months, mashed or finger food Orange and other citrus Strawberries Grapes Tomato Barley, rye and wheat Mushrooms Honey Soy Beef (pureed beef stew in tomato stock is so delicious!) Obviously there are a lot more foods. Fruit and Veggies can be introduced daily, new one every day to increase range and variety. With the protein foods – Start with one food at a time and wait 3-4 days before introducing a new food (this is to see if there is a delayed food intolerance that may not be immediately noticeable). Once one food is well tolerated you can mix and match (or mix and mash) – e.g., chicken and pumpkin, avocado and peas. There are lots of opinions on how to introduce foods and when to add spices and herbs. Personally, I think adding flavour is a great idea while the child’s palate is still developing. Many infants start with extremely spicy curries and peppered dishes. I don’t recommend that – unless your family is already used to some heat – but definitely consider adding a dash of cinnamon, a pinch of paprika, or some ground herbs like basil, thyme or oregano. Just remember that infant portions are very small, so the spice needs to be proportionate. Making your own is so much more fun (and less expensive) than buying baby food jars.

August 27, 2014

What Role Does Nutrition Play When It Comes To Your Child’s Sleep?

Not as much as you might be thinking…. Very often, when we talk to clients their main concern is that milk, milk supply, solids or the lack thereof, are the causes of their child not sleeping. This is a natural reaction due to the kinds of information new mothers are exposed to. In hindsight, I am embarrassed to admit, that I was shoving (and I mean, literally: forcefully, SHOVING) rice cereal down my 3 month old’s throat because I was convinced that he was hungry. This was supported by the sage advice of the older generation, who insisted that once I started feeding my solids, he’d magically start sleeping through. I also tried (with little success) “topping up” my baby’s breastmilk with formula because—as the nurse was telling me—he continued to wake at night because he is NOT receiving sufficient nutrition from me. I was also informed by loving friends and strangers alike that I should change the formula that I’ve selected for the young one, because my baby might in fact be lactose intolerant, therefore the current formula was causing him discomfort as it was being processed by the digestive system. Does any of this sound familiar? With the popularity of this type of ill-advice, it is very easy to fall into the “over-nutrition” trap. Moms, just because you are breastfeeding does not mean your child is not able to sleep through! What If I told you that only 5% of sleep problem cases have their root causes in nutrition challenges!? It is far more likely that that your baby has not yet developed the skill of soothing him/herself, and therefore nutrition is not the problem. The fundamental rule to remember is that your baby’s sleep is regulated by his/her brain and not by the stomach. When nutrition does play a role: Nevertheless, a hungry baby will not sleep well either; so here is a checklist to use to rule out whether nutrition is the problem: Is your baby growing according to his/her growth curve? Essentially, is your baby gaining weight steadily? Is your baby older than 6 months? If “yes”, solids can be introduced. How old is your child? If your child is younger than a year, milk is more important. If your child is older than a year, solids should be the primary source of nutrition. Does your child receive protein rich nutrition if he/she is older than 6 months? Does your child have a sufficient intake of minerals like Zinc, Magnesium and Iron? Does your child eat/drink too much salt, sugar or caffeine? These additives could spike energy levels, leaving the child in a hyper-alert stage. Is your baby drinking too much water, rooibos and/or juice? Remember, juice has a high concentration of sugar/fructose. Sugar is a drug – like it or not. We would live to believe that the hype around sugar is no more than drama-mongering by puritan foodies. Unfortunately they are right. People die from diseases every day that started (and ended) with their relationship to sugar. By sugar I am referring to high fructose corn syrup, which appears in just about every kind of sweetened convenience food, drink and confectionary. As well as good old table sugar. Of course there is a place for sugar, but when the average person has no idea about moderation it is good practice to abstain as much as possible. Possibly the most interesting research regarding sugar is not only the effect on the endocrine system, but the effect on the brain. Researchers reported in the “Neuroscience & Bio-Behavioural Review Report” in 2008 that “intermittent dietary sugar consumption alters extracellular dopamine in the brain, much in the way an addictive drug does. Moreover, when this intermittent sugar consumption ceases, dopamine levels are affected and signs of withdrawal can become evident. Not only can extracellular dopamine levels be affected but so too can the dopamine receptors themselves.” The sugar addicts and chocoholics were right! To initiate a restful sleep we need to encourage foods that support sleep-inducing neurotransmitters such as serotonin and melatonin. Traditionally these are foods rich in tryptophan and B complex vitamins. Growth hormones are also released when we sleep and these are essential for not only growth but also healing and repair.

August 21, 2014

Busting The Myths About Teen Suicide

By Janine Shamos All teens are moody; all teens are rebellious; all teens are angry and irritable; all teens are depressed. Aren’t they? Yet most of us still find it staggering that a teen could take his or her own life. Shouldn’t the world be filled with hope and possibility as a teen – not despair so deep that ending your life seems the only option? Teen suicide is a reality for many families. 9.5% of all teen deaths in South Africa are due to suicide and suicide as the fastest growing, and second leading, cause of death in the 15 – 24 age group. The National Youth Risk Survey found an alarming number of high school teens were depressed and suicidal – over 20% had considered suicide in the last month. But despite its prevalence, teen suicide is still shrouded in myth and misconception. It’s crucial we break the myths – there is no better way to prevent teen suicide. The South African Depression and Anxiety Group (SADAG) runs the only toll-free suicide crisis line in the country (0800 567 567) and the only teen suicide prevention programme in schools. “The Suicide Shouldn’t be a Secret programme now eleven years old, is aimed at educating teens and teachers about the warning signs, facts and interventions of teen suicide”, says SADAG’s Cassey Chambers. The programme has been implemented in schools across the country in rural, per-urban and urban schools. Teen suicide is a hard thing to think about, and many people turn a blind eye hoping it’s a problem that will solve itself. LOTTO, has taken the bold step of supporting SADAG’s teen suicide prevention initiative at 30 more high schools across Gauteng. SADAG will be talking to the teens as well as their teachers to demystify the issue of teen suicide. “Teachers have a lot of face time with their students and often see problems before the parents do”, says Chambers. “Too often they don’t recognise behaviour changes as potential problems and don’t know what to do or who to turn to for help. The programme offers that insight and quick access to assistance.” The SADAG programme is open to applications from schools who feel they are in need of such intervention. “If you have students who are at risk or you feel that prevention is key, let us know”, says Chambers. Schools can call Clare or Adri on 011 262 6396 for more information. “I thought that teen depression wasn’t an issue in our school, I thought our kids were ‘fine’ – until we had a Grade 10 student kill himself. It was so out of the blue, so sudden – and he was not the kind of person I would have thought would ever be depressed or want to take his own life. We all need educating”, says High School Educator Dianne. The myths surrounding teen suicide are numerous – and dangerous. “There is still a lot of ignorance – and prejudice – about suicide generally”, says Chambers. “Not only does this mean that those in need of help, don’t ask for it because of fear and shame, but also those who have lost loved ones due to suicide have a far tougher road to acceptance and healing.” US Researcher, Dr Thomas Joiner, refers to suicide as “the most stigmatised of human behaviours.” Many people mistakenly believe that you can’t intervene or make a difference – that a teen who wants to kill themselves will just keep trying until they get it right so ‘why bother’. “I used to think there was nothing you could do, then I heard a SADAG counsellor use the analogy of a heart attack. We don’t just resign ourselves to a loved one having repeated heart attacks until they die, we act and intervene. We need to do the same for teens who need psychological help”, says High School teacher Prudence. One of the biggest and most damaging myths is that if people want to die by suicide, we can’t stop them. The truth is that even teens who are serious about killing themselves can be helped. In the majority of cases, teens don’t want to die – but they see no other alternative. Providing another ‘way out’, another way to ease the pain is often the answer. Many adults are scared to talk about suicide, afraid to bring up the subject in case it makes the teen think about it. This isn’t true. “Simply talking about suicide won’t make your teenager more likely to try it”, says psychiatrist Dr Frans Korb. Frank conversation about suicide could have quite the opposite effect – and save a life. Many parents, teachers and peers believe that teens are all talk. “My friend used to always tell me she wanted to die, and that she was going to kill herself. I never took her seriously”, says 17-year-old Naomi. SADAG warns that up to 80% of teens give some kind of warning prior to a suicide attempt or completed suicide so, while your child may not always do what he or she says (like clean their bedroom), when it comes to talk of death and suicide – take it seriously. Most teens show a number of warning signs. “The key is knowing what to watch for and this is the power of the Suicide Shouldn’t be a Secret programme”, says Chambers. Teenagers who drink a lot, use drugs, run away from home, withdraw from friends, write or draw pictures about death, have trouble at school or go through a break-up may all be at risk for suicide. “There are many warning signs and the SADAG programme helps people understand what these signs mean and helps them put all these signs and triggers into context”, says Chambers. SADAG is open from 8am to 8pm 7 days a week on 0800 21 22 23, or visit www.sadag.org. The programme answers questions like: “My teen listens to metal – they sing about death and sometimes suicide. Does my

August 19, 2014

Your Diet During Pregnancy, How Important Is It Really?

With so many myths out there about diet and pregnancy, no wonder new mothers-to-be feel confused about the do’s and don’ts of their own diets. To eat appropriately is the one thing a mother have a lot of control over, and wants to get 100% right, but is so afraid of getting it wrong. We are regularly told that our weight, nutritional status and health during pregnancy and breastfeeding have effect on a baby’s risk of developing disease in future, birth risks, the baby’s health and growth both in the uterus and after birth. Scary as it may sound, with the right dietary advice and support it can actually be quite easy to get your diet right with a few easy tips. Will what I eat in pregnancy influence my child’s eating habits? Want your child to love veggies? Start early. Very early! New research shows that WHAT a woman eats during pregnancy not only nourishes her baby in the womb, but can influence a baby’s palate and food memories before he/she is born. The study found that a mother’s diet shapes her baby’s food preferences and acceptance later in life. Flavour perception develops as early as in the unborn infant and taste and smell continues to develop once they are born. In the womb, a fetus is surrounded and nourished on amniotic fluids, which is filled with the flavours of what the mom has eaten in the last few hours. The fetus starts to swallow large amounts of amniotic fluid from about 12 week’s gestation. By the time a womb reaches her third trimester the fetus’s brain starts to communicate with the taste and smell receptors – for the baby to start to associate with certain flavours and odours in the amniotic fluid. A baby therefore already starts to build a memory bank of tastes and flavours during pregnancy. Amniotic fluid is therefore the first food for the baby to feast on and contains protein, sugars, fat and different flavours of the food that the mother eats. The fetus can detect these tastes and flavours – forming memories of these flavours and will prefer flavours that were previously experienced in the amniotic fluid. It was shown that if mothers who consumed carrot, anise or garlic flavoured food during pregnancy, their infants would be more accepting to flavours later in life. The flavour learning continues when infants experience the flavours of mother’s diet transmitted in breast milk, especially flavours such as anise, garlic, carrot, mint, vanilla. When babies start solids they showed greater liking for and acceptance of flavours to which they had early exposure. This means you can teach your baby to like broccoli from an early age! This varied experiences with food flavours increase food acceptance and may help explain why children who are breastfed are less picky during childhood. Formula tastes the same day-in and day-out. If you plan to formula feed your infant, and worry about the lack of variants in flavours just make sure you introduce your baby to the largest variety of solid food and flavours early on in the weaning period. To conclude, if you want your children to eat a healthy diet (e.g. their broccoli) or more adventurous diet, you should expose them to all the right, healthy flavours early on. Will WHAT I eat during pregnancy affect what diseases my child may have in later life? There are some studies that show that the mother’s diet may affect whether children have the risk for developing diabetes, heart disease, obesity or high blood pressure later in life. During the war, when pregnant women were exposed to very little food, especially in the first trimester, their children were more likely to be born heavier, taller and develop heart disease in adulthood. Some studies suggest that when an expectant mother has too little protein and too many carbohydrates in her diet, the child may have a risk of high blood pressure later in life. This also applies to when you do not supplement your diet with the recommended vitamin and mineral supplements e.g. folic acid, iron calcium and vitamin D. “Over nutrition” during pregnancy also has detrimental effects and may cause the fetus to grow faster than the fetus’s organs and can lead to liver, heart and kidney disease in adulthood. There is also a suggestion in research that if your diet is rich in omega 3 fatty acids (mainly available in oily fish and seeds) during pregnancy it can protect the baby against ailments such as high blood pressure and heart disease in adult life. Should I avoid certain foods during pregnancy to prevent my child from having food allergies? Many scientific studies have been done to investigate whether mothers who avoid certain foods in the diet during pregnancy can control the presence of allergies and eczema in their babies once they are born. They all concluded that babies might or might not present with food allergies and eczema, regardless of the mother’s diet, especially when there is a strong family history of food allergies. They also concluded that avoiding certain food in the pregnant mother’s diet have shown to affect the mother and the baby’s nutritional status. Both may run the risk of missing out on essential vitamin and minerals contributing to an inadequate nutritional intake and is therefore not recommended. You can actually do more harm than good by avoiding anything in the diet for instance nuts, fish, eggs, milk, citrus fruits to prevent allergies in your baby. If you as expectant mother do suffer from food allergies and need to avoid certain foods it would be of benefit to consult a dietitian who would be able to provide you with a nutritionally balanced diet and ensure both you and your baby get all the nutrients you require. Super foods for pregnancy Eggs: It contains choline that helps to reduce the risk of neural tube defects, such as spina bifida. In addition, studies suggest that choline is key to the

August 18, 2014

Getting Some Sleep

Sleep deprivation is a form of torture. We all know this, and yet as parents we somehow expect ourselves to go for months or years without sleep and still function (and even be wonderful, calm, kind people). I’m sorry, but if specially trained soldiers crack under this particular form of torture, what makes you think you will be any different? So if your two, three, four or even seven year-old is still keeping you up at night, let’s look at some possible questions you can ask to get to the bottom of the problem. Now step one would be to make sure there are no serious health complications keeping the child awake. A quick trip to the GP can set your mind at rest and get you started on the following investigations! I always start by looking at the kids’ diets… what are they eating? Are they eating more carbohydrates than protein for instance? I would start by cutting out all sugar and refined carbs (wheat, flour, baked stuff etc) and increase fat and protein intake especially at night. It can also help to give a Magnesium supplement before bed (you can get these in a delicious syrup for kids, but please check with your healthcare advisor before adding supplements to your child’s diet). Do you have a proper routine that you stick to daily? i.e. Dinner at a certain time followed by bath, story and bed? Do you start winding down in the afternoons? A consistent routine can help a child to settle more quickly and to adapt to change more easily. How much TV are they exposed to? Television is highly stimulating. Definitely cut out TV right before bed (a bedtime story is much more calming), but you can even try cutting this out altogether and see if it makes a difference. Have they always slept less than other babies? Do they still have a daytime nap? With an older child you can try cutting this out – if they make it through the afternoon in a generally happy state, then leave the nap. If not, add it back in. My kids stopped their daytime nap at 18 months and were perfectly happy without it (and then slept well at night), so don’t always believe that a child needs a daytime nap until they are 4 or 5. What time do they go to bed? What time do they wake up? Do they then seem tired or ok? Some children need less sleep, and putting them to bed before they’re ready is a recipe for disaster! If your child is keeping you awake tossing and turning in your bed, then you need to ask… Have they always slept in your bed? Do they feel safe in their own room? Is there something they need to help them feel more comfortable/safe there? Keep in mind that as adults we generally share a room with a partner and even then we still sometimes get scared in the night and yet we expect a 5-year-old to cope on their own. Do they go to sleep in their own room and then come to you? It may help to lie down with them in their own room until they fall asleep and then do this every time they wake in the night and come to your room – I know it’s time consuming and frustrating especially if you’re sleep deprived, but worth it in the long run. Or if you’d like to keep your child in your room, but still get some sleep, consider having their cot or mattress in your room but not necessarily having them in your bed! There are so many possible factors involved when it comes to children not sleeping, that it is worth doing some investigating to find out where things have gone awry. Hopefully these questions will help you to get started. It is then also worth examining your own belief systems around what is enough sleep, when kids should sleep and where, and whether your needs are less important than theirs. Happy families are a balancing act of making sure that both the parents and children’s needs are being met, and your need for sleep is essential not only to your own well-being, but to the well-being of the entire family. Keep this in mind as you investigate. And sleep tight!

August 13, 2014

Stay Well Watered This Winter

If you thought you could cut back on or forego the water drinking during the Winter months you have been gravely misinformed. Although in Winter we do not perspire as much or get as thirsty as we do in Summer, there are many other reasons why we still need to take in adequate amounts of water no matter the season. Read on to learn why we are actually at great risk of becoming dehydrated in cold weather. Water Is Critical To Health You probably have heard that two-thirds of your body is water. This is why humans can go for forty days without food but cannot survive more than a week without water. Three quarters of your brain is water. Your blood is 82% water and your muscles are 70% water. Water is an important structural component of skin, cartilage, tissues and organs and is used by the body to carry out almost all bodily processes. Water improves oxygen delivery to the cells, transports nutrients, cushions bones and joints, lubricates and absorbs shocks to joints, regulates body temperature, removes waste and flushes out toxins, and much more. So What Happens If We Don’t Get Enough? The first sign that you’re not drinking enough water is thirst but did you know that by the time you experience thirst, or a dry mouth, you are already under-hydrated? Taking in too little water can also result in headaches, dizziness, lethargy, muscle weakness and cramps, loss of appetite, constipation, depression, and brain fog. Waking up not feeling refreshed and with aches and pains in your legs may also be a sign. Little or no urination or dark yellow urine is a sign of more serious levels of dehydration. If your urine is clear you know you are hydrating your body sufficiently. Dangers Of Dehydration Continuous water loss over time will speed up aging as well as increase risks of some serious health conditions. Symptoms of the body’s deterioration begins to appear when the body loses 5% of its total water volume. In a healthy adult, this is seen as fatigue and general discomfort, whereas for an infant, it can be serious. Reductions of 15% below our healthy hydration levels could be fatal. In an elderly person, a 5% water loss causes the body chemistry to become abnormal, especially if the percentage of electrolytes is overbalanced with sodium. High blood pressure, rapid ageing and disorientation may result. Even moderate dehydration can result in nasty conditions such as urinary tract infections, kidney stones, eczema, acne, sinusitis, gout and arthritis. In Winter, lack of water and the dry air will dry out the mucous membranes of your lungs, nasal passages and gut, Since these are protective barriers against bacteria, viruses and pollutants, allowing them to dry out leaves the body susceptible to colds, coughs, flu and sinusitis. The reason allergies abound in Winter is probably due to increased dehydration. Water is essential to the functioning of the digestive tract and the removal of toxic waste. If your intestinal transit time (the time it takes for food to enter and leave your body) slows down, then more toxins are retained. Higher levels of toxic waste products in the bowel, lymph, and bloodstream is a proven contributing factor to many illnesses such as chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia and psoriasis. How Do We Become Dehydrated In Winter? The average adult loses about 2.5 litres water daily through perspiration, breathing and elimination. One may argue that water loss should then be less in Winter because we do not perspire much. But have you noticed that we urinate more frequently in cold weather? As a temperature control mechanism our bodies have to get rid of the excess fluid and since we don’t perspire much, our kidneys take over and get rid of this excess through increased urination. The breathing process uses water to moisten the oxygen we breathe in and breathing in cold, dry air actually takes up more water. But there are more factors which come into play in Winter and can leave one considerably dehydrated: In cold weather, most of us will increase our consumption of warming drinks such as coffee and that glass of sherry or red wine in front of the fireplace is exceptionally comforting and warming. However caffeine and alcohol act like a diuretic causing us to urinate more frequently. Fireplaces and heaters dry the air in the room and as such draw moisture from our bodies too. Being outdoors in the cold, dry air will also dry out your skin causing overall water loss from your body. Our change in diet in Winter is also a factor. Raw fruit and veggies such as cucumber and lettuce contain as much as 95% water. So if you eat these you can drink less water. However in Winter we ditch the cold raw salads for more warming foods which have lost their water in the cooking process. How Do We Stay Hydrated? The unfortunate fact is that we just don’t feel as thirsty when the weather is cold. That is why we need to make a conscious effort to ensure we stay hydrated. Start your morning with a large glass of water before breakfast. Your day’s supply of 2 litres water needs to be within easy reach so you can sip at it all day. Take it to work with you in a glass bottle and keep it on your desk or wherever you spend most of your time – not in the fridge where it will be out of sight, out of mind. Take water with you on your travels – preferably in glass bottles or a flask. Make an effort to eat some raw foods with your meals. Salads and fruits are very hydrating as are fresh vegetable and fruit juices made in your home juicer. Reduce your intake of caffeinated drinks and alcoholic beverages or at least have a glass of water with each drink. In a heated room keep the air humidified by placing bowls

August 7, 2014

My Divorce Discipline Dilemma

I didn’t realize that a year after my divorce , with a group of unruly children on my hands, that I and I alone had contributed to their lack of discipline.My once , well mannered ,obedient children were now bordering on juvenile delinquents that I hardly recognized and most defiantly did not like. As always, we are able to see others faults and never our own and it wasn’t until someone pointed out to me that I was about to just give in to save myself the “fight” , that I realized I’d become a “guilt ” mom. One of those parents who just gives in .So why you may ask , if I’d successfully brought up 6 amazing children and with so many years child care experience did I make this fault? Was I just lazy? Did I give up on parenting? Had I forgotten to put my children first? There are many factors , from stress to financial and lifestyle changes . We suffered the loss of not having our family structure complete, and I personally missed my other children who are provinces away from us. Our lifestyle changed as I went from a full time stay at home, home school mom to suddenly working the 8 hour day and the children attended school for the first time. Thrown into the mix were special needs , learning disabilities , homework ,after care issues , school runs , a new province , no support system and trying to be both parents, emotionally , physically and financially , to my children as they adjusted to this upheaval. I don’t believe I ever intentionally didn’t put them , their emotions or needs first but truthfully, it became easier to give in than to “fight “and see them “hurt ” all over again. I was also exhausted , overwhelmed and trying to keep it together when everything was falling apart around me.The biggest problem with this is that I created a catalyst for myself. We lost our familiarity and structure. Struggling to gain a daily routine my children began to act out looking for their safe comforts. I was unable to see this , amidst the chaotic new lifestyle we began. So , how do you fix these issues?To fix a problem you first have to see it . Then acknowledge it and take ownership for the part you’ve played in creating the problem. Being responsible by changing what’s wrong to ensure the problem is resolved is a lot easier said than done. That takes courage , resolve and patience.I had to remind myself , I had created this problem over a year , it wasn’t going to fix itself overnight. And yes , I still find myself tempted to just give in . But , seeing how much calmer our home is and watching my children return to their loving selves is enough to keep me from giving in.It took some tough love on my eldest son, 17, but firm boundaries and following through with my words and actions were an asset in reinforcing family and home rules . It took many tears , mostly mine . Some guilt and hours of beating myself over for being a bad mom .With the younger children , 13 and 11, it was easier . By setting stricter rules and not allowing myself to get caught up in the emotion behind the misbehavior I am able to keep control and of course following through with what I say. We will never have the same structure or family dynamic as before but our home rules haven’t changed . We finding a new groove to slot into, one that works uniquely for us. And yes , it is that easy.We all make mistakes as parents . None of us are given a rule book to follow and all the advise in the world is just advise if you haven’t walked that road. My children and I are on a road we’ve never traveled before and we doing it one day and one mistake at a time.

July 30, 2014

Bullying and Teen Suicide

by Stephanie Harel “For 2 years, Johnny, a quiet 13-year-old boy was a human play-thing for some of his classmates. The teenagers badgered Johnny for money, forced him to swallow weeds and drink milk mixed with detergent, beat him up in the restroom and tied a string around his neck, leading him around as a pet”. (Olweus, 1995 – as cited in Marsh & Wolfe, Abnormal Child Psychology, 4th edition, 2010, p. 164). Someone once said that suicide happens when the fear of life exceeds the fear of death… A most chilling definition of what it means to take one’s life. The literature on teen bullying is voluminous and yet, it is a social ill that remains largely ignored. Bullying is an old concept that we are all familiar with. However, bullying in schools today continues to be rife, and South African schools are not exempt from it. This hostile form of antisocial behaviour has almost gained the status of social pandemic. It is a phenomenon that often has tragic consequences, as is apparent in websites entitled ‘bullying stats’. Nowadays teen suicides by victims of bullies are more frequently reported. Bullying happens when one or more people expose another to unpleasant actions that take the form of physical offense, verbal insults and deliberate alienation from a group. Irrespective of the angle that bullying takes, its overriding intention remains the same throughout the world: it presents itself as coward disguised as macho, it creates an imbalanced power relationship where the victim is incapable of defence. Although it is important to note that girls differ from boys in the ways they bully others, whereby girls use more indirect forms of social aggression such as gossiping and spreading rumours whilst boys are more directly threatening, it is just as important to bear in mind that whatever form it takes, bullying is universally offensive and can cause death. Understanding the profile of a bully may help to create awareness and may increase the knowledge of those who are empowered to make a difference in schools. Typical bullies are usually aggressive towards both peers and adults. They are often impulsive, have a need to dominate others, are physically stronger than their peers, have little empathy and derive satisfaction from inflicting pain on their victims. More recently, bullying has adopted technology as an additional means of inflicting harm on its victims. The widespread access to the Internet and cell phones has led to new forms of bullying. Threats, insults, harassment and intimidation now reach victims by emails, text messaging and defamatory websites. This new channel of violence has taken on unprecedented momentum – Internet bullying in the USA is believed to be even more common than face-to-face bullying. “Technology has wider implications. Because social media never sleeps, bullying today has no boundaries. Previously home provided some reprieve from bullying at school; today a victim has no place to hide. The onslaught continues 24/7, beyond the classroom and the playground, via cyberspace. Technology has stretched the limits of bullying by adding a timeless psychological element to it that could intensify its impact.” Without major school interventions and policies, the prevalence of bullying will remain high. Besides suicide and other tragic consequences that this social menace brings, bullying has further implications. In the USA research has shown that nearly 40% of boys who were bullies in school were convicted of repeated criminal offenses by the time they were 24 years old. So bullying has a long lifespan. Furthermore, in discussions on bullying, the spotlight is often on the bully; to date, not much consideration has been given to reactions of the victim that survives. Victims might be stereotypically thought of as anxious, submissive and physically weak, but resentment is most definitely a trait that they could possess, a dormant trait that is nonetheless present. Once resentment awakens, it could be fuelled by the incessant pattern of bullying, it could spiral out of control. Resentment leads to anger and from there on to full blown retaliation that may know no boundaries. When a ‘victim turns perpetrator’ the number of casualties could be fatal. Albeit reluctantly, we are reminded of the school shootings in the USA – could those terrifying acts have perhaps been products of a long history of bully victims?

July 25, 2014

My life as a Dietitian but a MOTHER to a fussy eater

Thrown away yet another plate of your child’s food? OR is he/she refusing to eat anything else than french fries for the last two days – if anything at all? Have you gone from begging, to nagging to screaming just to get in one bite of veggies? Well, JOIN THE CLUB! I am a dietitian (yes dietitians too can have children with eating troubles) and a mother of a 4 and 2 year old. My 4 year old daughter has been introduced to every possible fruit and vegetable as a baby and ate it all – from potatoes to leeks and peppers!! But once the terrible two’s hit she started refusing all her favourite healthy foods and everything on top of that. She would not even taste something new. If she could eat mini cheddars for a month she would and will NOT get tired of it. I wanted to pull the hair out of my head and became worried that she’ll develop nutritional deficiencies. I simply started implementing my knowledge as dietitian and it really worked – we are making great progression and every week she started to taste something new and the next week she will eat it – like it’s just another French fry… As parent we make a common mistake and assume kids won’t eat or like certain foods and there is a perception that kids like chicken nuggets, fries and sandwiches and we are hesitant to introduce foods we fear they won’t eat. Our attitude towards food are just as important as the foods we offer. I want to share a few tips which really worked for me: DO NOT make separate food for your child – I cannot stress this enough..If he doesn’t want to eat the food you prepared for him..whatever you do..DO NOT give in to temptation and give something else!! Children are master manipulators and food is one of the mayor ways to manipulate parents. This you should keep on implementing, but it worked like a charm Eat at least one meal together as a family – monkey see..monkey do! Let them help in food preparation – it helps them to learn about certain foods and get familiar with it. Give small portion and praise your child for eating…even if it is just a bite. Don’t give anything else than water in the hour before meals, this will ensure your child is hungry Minimize distraction – try and avoid watching television while eating Whatever you do try to not bribe with dessert or don’t use food as a reward. He will start to think of sweets as good and veggies as nasty. Try and organise to eat with friends whose children eat well – good examples work well, but do not give too much attention NEVER force a child to eat. If he rejects the food, stay calm, remove the plate, keep it in the microwave and when he complains he is hungry later on, offer the same food Be patient. Some children are slow eater Remember … kids eat with their eyes. So if you have to make a flower with cucumber and tomatoes or a sun with oranges, just do it, because the last thing you want is a teenager who still needs to have the crusts cut off of the bread and eats nothing but starch and meat!! Keep introducing a new food with every meal. It takes 10-15 times for your toddler to see a new food before he/she will try it Remember children’s tastes changes, so one day he’ll hate something, next month he will love it, so KEEP CALM … and KEEP COOKING !

July 24, 2014

Cutting in Adolescence

The following is not meant to invoke fear, though it may, but rather, inform you as to a trend starting in early adolescence that has existed for decades in the dark. There is a plethora of means to self-harm, such as anorexia, or starving / restricting food intake; bulimia, or purging / vomiting up food soon after consumption; and so on. However, the form of self-harm briefly discussed here falls within the realm of self-mutilation, known as cutting. Burning oneself is also included as another form of self-mutilation. The information to follow may be difficult to read, though awareness is necessary. Take breaks in reading this article if need be and do not continue reading until you feel more settled. Emerging adolescence is an extremely challenging time developmentally, emotionally, psychologically, culturally, and socially. As such it is not uncommon for adolescents to experiment with various means, such as sex, drugs, and alcohol, as well as exercise, and academia, to sooth their plight. Another means is cutting. Often cutting involves the straight, parallel, mild to severe, incisions to the skin. In addition, words, patterns, and symbols may present. These injuries are commonly located on the outer and inner forearms, biceps, shoulders, and the outer and inner thighs. Cutting has been also known to occur, in even more severe instances, on the hips, in the nooks and crannies of the palms, under the feet, between the fingers and toes, on the breasts, as well as on other genitals for females, and for males. Though cutting is significantly more common in young girls and older women, cutting definitely occurs among clusters of young boys and older men as well. In fact, cutting has become increasingly popular among male youths. Commonly, cutting is an isolative and secretive experience in terms of the action itself, and in concealing the outcome. In general, adolescents hide their more risky behaviours, and, in general, we adults tend not to see the extent of those behaviours. Thus cutting may occur for many months, or years, or may never be discovered. Though few who cut wear their injuries like a badge, most hide their wounds with thin, long-sleeve tops and jeans, even in extreme heat, and insistently avoid shorts, dresses, short-sleeve tops, and the like. More seasoned self-mutilators will knowingly wear shortened clothing to avoid suspicion, and cut on the fewer hidden areas. The point here is to be aware of unusual behaviour and potential warning signs, and not to assume self-mutilation when faced with fashion choices we simply do not understand or we outright dislike. Self-mutilation or cutting may occur with almost any implement, for example, kitchen knives, forks, pocket knives, scissors, razor blades, glass, paperclips, paperclip removers, nails, keys, box cutters, bottle openers, barbwire fencing, thorny bushes, open canned-food lids, nail clippers, paint peelers, and the like. The list is essentially endless. It is impossible to eliminate all items that may be used for cutting; however, one may take note of implements that are oddly located, stained with dried blood, missing, and so on. In addition, note whether plasters, tape, bandages, cloths, gauze, and/or disinfectants, are empty frequently, or inexplicably. Furthermore, note whether blood-stained clothing is placed in the wash, even within, or under other clothes; and/or whether clothes have ‘disappeared’ at a highly unorthodox pace. Those clothes may have had dried blood on them, and so, discarded. The reasons behind cutting as a means of coping or self-soothing are far too vast to explore in-depth here, however, briefly, most cutters tend to self-harm to anesthetise, ‘zone-out’, distract from, or numb feelings, such as despair, helplessness, self-hatred, emptiness, frustration, rage, hopelessness, regret, guilt, shame, and so on. In contrast, cutting also may be used in order to shift from a state of numbness to a place of feeling, such as feeling in control, free, special, accepted, joyous (usually from an endorphin or adrenalin rush), powerful, focused, calm, relieved, and so on. Though this is a general description in understanding self-mutilation, it is important that the individual cutter become aware of their idiosyncratic reasons for doing what they do. Despite the myth, once an adolescent has found cutting as a means of coping or self-soothing, it is generally quite difficult to just simply stop the behaviour, and relapses or re-occurrences are expected, even in treatment. The hope is to reduce the frequency and severity of the cutting over time until it becomes needless and purposeless. Use the analogy of an alcoholic and his or her alcohol to grasp the difficulty involved. In that, it is always important to keep a complete and unexpired first aid kit regardless of whether cutting occurs or not. It is important that adolescents are approached calmly and gently when engaged by his or her worried, panicked, frustrated, confused, angry, and/or saddened parent or caregiver, upon questioning, or discovery, of any cutting or self-mutilating behaviours. As stated earlier, adolescents tend to not fully disclose their thoughts, feelings, and behaviours to their caregivers. As such, adolescents who are unable to talk about, or even articulate, their cutting to their parents or caregivers, should be referred to their nearest or most trusted healthcare professional, such as a psychiatrist and/or psychologist. In more severe instances, visits and/or admission to the nearest medical or psychiatric hospital or treatment facility may be most opportune. In that, though cutting itself differs from an actual suicide attempt, accidental death may occur in certain circumstances, and in a few severe instances, suicide attempts may co-occur. It is then better to err on the side of caution, than avoid, dismiss, or ignore. In terms of understanding cutting better, two excellent books to read are Marliee Strong’s (1998) A Bright Red Scream: Self-Mutilation and the Language of Pain; and Steven Levenkron’s (1998) Cutting: Understanding and Overcoming Self-Mutilation.

July 22, 2014

Diet & Delinquency – A Connection?

We are all aware that “we are what we eat”, however our knowledge is usually limited to the fact that the wrong foods could cause heart attacks, obesity and compromise our immune systems but the idea that they can also affect our minds, even our behaviour is less known. However Patrick Holford in his book “Food is better medicine than drugs” says: “…children and adults with ADHD often have one or more nutritional imbalances that, once identified and corrected, can dramatically improve their energy, focus, concentration and behaviour” and “The combination of the right vitamins, minerals and essential fats can truly transform children with learning and behavioural difficulties.” He quotes the following four nutritional solutions that have been well proven to make a difference: Sugar-free and low GL diets Essential fats especially Omega-3s Vitamins and minerals Allergy-free and additive-free diets Go sugar-free There are a number of possible causes of ADHD but the most common is blood sugar problems. Sugar is rocket fuel to an ADHD child so you can expect him to get out of control. Dietary studies consistently reveal that hyperactive children tend to eat more sugar than other children and while going from sugary drinks to sugary snacks throughout the day, some of these kids consume 50 teaspoons of sugar in a day. Yes, for proper brain function he does need a constant supply of glucose to his brain but this is best achieved by controlling insulin levels. Do this by ensuring your child has protein and carbohydrate at every meal and snack, e.g. fruit and nuts or rice and fish. Eliminate sugars and refined carbohydrates such as white bread and white rice from his diet and replace with complex carbohydrates such as brown rice, rolled oats, lentils and barley. Also replace fizzy drinks and fruit juices with clean water. Essential Fats Children diagnosed with ADHD often show symptoms of essential fatty acid deficiency, such as excessive thirst, dry skin, eczema and asthma. Omega-3s are found in oily fish such as sardines, salmon and mackerel but most ADHD children will also need to take fish oil capsules daily, containing at least 200 mg EPA and 100 mg DHA. Flax, sunflower and pumpkin seeds are good sources of omega 6 and 9 and should be added to food or used as snacks every day. Pumpkin seeds are also high in magnesium which is calming. Use only olive oil in cooking and salads. Vitamins and Minerals It is well documented that academic performance improves and behavioural problems diminish significantly when children are given nutritional supplements. A whole green food supplement, such as the dried juice of barley grass, would be best here since it is easily digested and contains enzymes, vitamins and minerals that work together synergistically. Nature knows best! ADHD sufferers are commonly deficient in two minerals in particular, namely magnesium and zinc. Identify food sensitivities One study showed that ADHD children turned out to be seven times more likely to have food allergies than other children, the most common being dairy products and wheat. A very high percentage of ADHD children react to food colourants and flavourings, MSG, dairy, chocolate or oranges. Other problematic foods are corn, yeasts, soya, peanuts and eggs. If your ADHD child also exhibits some of the following symptoms of nasal problems and excessive mucus, ear infections, facial swelling, tonsillitis, digestive problems, bad breath, bedwetting, then a food allergy test is worth doing. Otherwise avoid all processed foods and treat your child to natural, wholesome food that you have prepared yourself! A treatable disorder Though it may take trial and error to find out what works for your child, it is well worth the effort. Effective treatment will allow individuals to realize their abilities and intelligence, making huge differences in their self-esteem and capacity to function in the world.

July 18, 2014

Smoking and Your Baby

Mothers’ smoking during pregnancy is well-recognized as carrying a range of serious health risks for the unborn baby including fetal mortality, low birth weight, premature birth and a range of serious birth defects such as cleft palate, club foot and heart problems. Heart Defects Congenital heart defects are the most common type of birth defects, contributing to approximately 30 percent of infant deaths from birth defects annually. Tobacco exposure in the womb may be a huge contributing factor. According to study results just published in the 28 Feb 2011 issue of the journal Pediatrics, women who smoke during the first trimester of pregnancy increase their unborn child’s risk of being born with congenital heart defects by 20 to 70 percent. The study, conducted by the Centre for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), found a link between tobacco and defects that inhibit blood flow from the right side of the heart into the lungs and openings between the upper chambers of the heart. Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) SIDS, also known as cot death, is marked by the sudden death of an infant that is unexpected by medical history and remains unexplained after a thorough forensic autopsy and a detailed death scene investigation. However, studies show that infants of mothers who smoked during pregnancy are three times more likely to die of SIDS than those whose mothers were smoke-free. Furthermore, exposure to secondhand smoke doubles a baby’s risk of SIDS. According to the US Surgeon General’s Report, infants who die from SIDS tend to have higher concentrations of nicotine and conicotine (a biological marker for secondhand smoke exposure) in their body fluids than those who die from other causes. Yet another good reason to ditch the cigs. I know quitting smoking is no easy task but it just has to be easier than grieving for a lost child! Second Hand Smoke A pregnant mother who does not smoke and breathes in secondhand smoke has a 23% higher chance of delivering a stillborn baby or a 13% higher chance of giving birth to a child with congenital birth defects. This is what researchers from the University of Nottingham, England, revealed in the journal Pediatrics. As we still do not know when the effects of secondhand smoke may begin, it is important to protect women from environmental tobacco smoke not only during pregnancy, but also beforehand. Expectant fathers need to be aware of the harmful effects their smoking might have, and ultimately, in the interests of their partner and their unborn child, the best option would be to give up completely (Men also need to know that smoking does have an impact on sperm development and hence the prospects of the resulting foetus. Please quit before you even try for a baby). Enter Third Hand Smoke. Unheard of before but now thought to be the reason why babies who sleep in their parents’ bedrooms exhibit nicotine levels three times higher than those that sleep in another room – even though the parents don’t smoke in their bedroom. These figures show that they suffer from what is known as “third-hand smoke”, in other words the harmful smoke particles that impregnate their parents’ skin, clothes and hair. This third hand smoke – the invisible remains of cigarette smoke that deposits on carpeting, clothing, furniture and other surfaces – also poses a serious health hazard to babies crawling on carpets. So what to do? In view of all the above, the guidelines to parents are clear: Do not smoke during pregnancy (mothers and fathers). Never smoke or let anyone smoke near your baby. Never smoke or let anyone smoke in a room where your baby will sleep. If you smoke, do not sleep in the same room as your baby. Don’t hesitate to ask visitors not to smoke near your baby. Avoid visiting smoky places with your baby. Any of the above will make your baby smoke passively and increase his/her risk of health problems significantly. Baby will also be more prone to colds and airway infections and have an increased chance to develop asthma and other diseases. Quitting is the single most important thing a couple can do to give their baby a chance at better health. So how about quitting today!

July 17, 2014

ADHD?

“There was a little girl who had a little curl Right in the middle of her forehead. When she was good she was very, very good, And when she was bad She was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.” This is quote from the British Satirical Magazine, Private Eye. Amusing maybe but also very sad, and makes me wonder how often a perfectly normal child is diagnosed with ADHD. Ritalin Deficiency? ADHD is characterized by impulsive behavior, inability to concentrate, short attention span, ease of distraction, and hyperactivity. The number-one drug used to treat ADHD is Ritalin, a central nervous system stimulant. Is it possible we are breeding a new generation of children who are Ritalin deficient? Highly unlikely. Try this theory rather: ADHD is caused by the food that children of this generation are putting into their mouths. How do we expect a child to have normal behaviour if he is fed refined grains, sugars, processed foods loaded with chemicals, juices and fizzy drinks? Then add to that 90 percent fewer vegetables than required along with an overabundance of omega-6 fats and a virtual lack of omega-3 fats. Fish oil does it again A study by the University of Adelaide in Australia found that fish oil improves the symptoms of ADHD more effectively than drugs like Ritalin and Concerta and without any of the side effects. When 130 children between the ages of 7 and 12 with ADHD were given fish oil capsules daily, behaviour dramatically improved within three months. Furthermore, after seven months, the children were not as restless and showed improvements at school in concentration and attention, reading abilities and vocabulary. When the researchers compared their results to studies of Ritalin and Concerta for ADHD, they found that fish oils were more effective. This poses the question: “Why treat millions of ADHD kids with drugs more powerful than cocaine when a simple food change is far more effective?” – I leave that one for you to think about. The Cleverness Capsule The Daily Mail reported the following on 10 May 2005: “Jamie Oliver may be responsible for revolutionising school dinners, but now it seems one simple change to children’s diet could not only boost their brain power but also make them better behaved. A major new study found that adaily dose of fish oil supplements had a dramatic effect on the abilities of underachieving children in Durham.” Apart from the fact that parents reported a significant improvement in their behaviour, after just three months on the fish oils, they were reading at18 monthsabove their age.In addition, most of the pupils showed a 10 – 20% improvement in memory. The supplement was also given to children without behavioural or learning difficulties and in some of these cases a dramatic and even immediate effect was reported. Numerous studies Numerous studies conducted in all parts of the world on the effect of supplementing with Omega-3 from fish oils have shown similar results leaving a strong suggestion that some children with developmental problems, including ADHD and dyslexia, can benefit from taking omega-3 supplements. And no adverse effects have been reported to date. Researchers believe that fish oil works via effects on brain function. You simply cannot have a healthy functioning brain in a child that is not given the proper ingredients to develop optimal brain function. What else is needed? If you have a child with learning or behavioural difficulties, before you allow him or her to be labeled ADHD and placed on Ritalin, it may be worth giving fish oil a chance. However this will need to go hand-in–hand with a healthy diet and a good multivitamin and mineral supplement. All the fish oil in the world is not going to help a child who is still being fed junk food.

July 14, 2014

Healthful Tips For A Healthy Pregnancy

You have just found out that you are pregnant – all excited and ready to let the world know that you are about to bring forth a new life! But once the initial excitement is over, you begin to ponder over what you should or should not be doing to ensure you have a healthy baby. Good nutrition plays a vital role for both the mother and the unborn child. An expectant mother should therefore be aware of the influence her nutritional choices will have on her and her little one. Here are some common questions and answers to help empower those moms-to-be! How much weight should you gain? Should pregnant women really be eating for two? What kinds of foods should be included, limited and avoided? How to manage nausea? What about supplements? What is gestational diabetes and how do you manage it? What about high cholesterol levels during pregnancy? How Much Weight Should I Gain? The amount of weight gain will vary depending on your pre-pregnancy weight. If you are at a healthy weight (BMI between 18.5 and 25) before pregnancy, your weight increase over the pregnancy period should be between 11-16kg. If you are overweight (BMI between 25 and 30), you should not gain more than 7-11kg. If you are obese (BMI above 30) you should not gain more than 7kg. If you were underweight prior to conception (BMI less than 18.5), you should gain between 12-18kg. Adequate weight gain as well as following a healthy, balanced diet is required to ensure the health of your baby. Should Pregnant Women Really Be Eating For Two? Eating for two from the beginning of your pregnancy is a common myth which, if followed, can result in unnecessary weight gain. During the first trimester, you should only gain about one or two kilograms of body weight, as nutritional requirements only increase from the second trimester onwards (i.e. from the fourth month). To put this into perspective, during the second trimester energy intakes should increase by about 1,420 kJ (equivalent to 2 dairy and 2 starch servings) per day and a further 470 kJ (equivalent to 1 starch and 1 fruit serving) per day in the third trimester (this being for someone who had a healthy BMI prior to conception). Note: energy requirements increase due to growth of the baby and the mother’s increased body weight. Additional energy requirements will differ from person to person and is also dependent on the mother’s level of physical activity. What Kinds Of Foods Should Be Included, Limited And Avoided? The Heart and Stroke Foundation South Africa (HSF) recommends including a variety of foods from the different food groups (dairy, starch, protein, vegetables, fruit and fats) before conception as well as during pregnancy. The minimum number of servings per food group should be as follows: Low fat or fat free dairy (milk, yoghurt, cheese, buttermilk or maas) – to provide adequate calcium and protein (3 servings per day – 1 serving is equivalent to 1 cup (250 ml) milk, 1 tub (175 ml) yoghurt or a matchbox size (30g) of cheese) Unrefined starches (whole wheat bread, rolls, cereals, rice, pasta and potatoes) – to provide fibre, proteins and B vitamins (7 servings per day – 1 serving is equivalent to 1 slice of bread, ½ cup cereal, porridge, cooked pasta or rice) Lean proteins (meat, fish, chicken, turkey, ostrich, soya, eggs, legumes and lentils) – to provide protein, iron and B vitamins (7 servings per day – 1 serving is equivalent to a matchbox size (30g) of meat/chicken/fish, 1 egg, 1/3 cup of beans or lentils) Vegetables and fruit to provide vitamins and minerals (at least 5 servings per day – 1 serving is equivalent to 1 medium sized fruit, ½ cup cooked vegetables or 1 cup of raw vegetables or salad) Healthy fats (mono and polyunsaturated such as vegetable oils, soft-tub margarines, avocado, olives, nuts and seeds) (around 3 servings per day – 1 serving is equivalent to 1 teaspoon oil or soft tub margarine, ¼ avo, a small handful of nuts or seeds) Note: The quantities of food should be adjusted to meet individual requirements to promote appropriate weight gain. Pregnant teenagers and underweight women may need greater quantities and should preferably consult a dietitian or health care professional. Water: Drink plenty of clean, safe water daily. Increasing fibre intake without drinking adequate water can lead to constipation. Artificial Sweeteners: Moderate use of these sweeteners has been deemed safe even though some sweeteners can be transmitted over the placenta. It must be noted though that women with a rare metabolic condition, phenylketonuria (PKU), should avoid these sweeteners. Caffeine: Caffeine intake should be limited to no more than 2 cups of coffee or 5 cups of tea per day. Alcohol: No alcohol should be consumed during pregnancy as it can lead to foetal alcohol syndrome (resulting in slow growth, slow mental development, eye problems, face and skull abnormalities and low birth weight). Although some health professionals will advise on moderate drinking, we don’t know at what level the harmful effects start. Therefore it is better to completely avoid alcohol. For Food Safety Reasons To Reduce The Risk Of Food Borne Illnesses, Avoid: Processed cold meats or deli meats unless they are reheated until very hot Avoid cured but uncooked meats like smoked salmon or Parma ham. Cooked cold meats such as smoked chicken, ham or beef can be eaten if you buy from a reputable store, make sure it’s in date, and store meat in a fridge without letting it stand outside at room temperature. Soft cheeses like feta, brie, camembert and blue veined cheese unless they are labelled ‘made with pasteurised milk’. Other options like mozzarella, cheese spreads and cottage cheese can be safely consumed Refrigerated paté or meat spreads. Canned or shelf-stable paté and meat spreads can be eaten Eating smoked seafood that is refrigerated unless it’s an ingredient in a cooked dish like pizza Raw/seared fish or shellfish as well as rare meat cuts Unwashed vegetables How To Manage Nausea? Nausea is common during pregnancy and you can try one of

July 9, 2014

Games Are Fun And Really Good For Us

One of the easiest and fastest ways for grown-ups to feel like kids again is to play games with them. It turns out playing games are actually really good for us. Carol Surya, author and child psychologist who has developed the children’s self esteem game, InnerMagic™ explains why: 1. Games promote family fun and togetherness Playing games naturally connect us with others, giving us a chance to be together in a “present-moment” way. By having regular ‘game time’ we’re giving the whole family ‘time off’ to be together and have fun. We’re also showing our kids that play is important and that we value spending quality time with them. 2. Games teach patience, sharing and good sportsmanship Even simple games like hide and seek or snakes and ladders involve taking turns and learning to respect others’ feelings. Kids can learn to regulate their own emotions by learning how it feels to ‘win’ and ‘loose’, inevitably building awareness of rules, ‘good play’ and fairness. Much needed life skills! 3. Playing games are fun and make us happy Instantly ridding us of seriousness and bringing us into the present, games are a sure way to make us happy and can even help kids feel more confident. The interaction and hands on time spent with us is what they thrive on. 4. Through game play we can master a ton of skills By playing the same game repetitively, a child’s brain can learn concepts that could take a lot longer to master in the classroom setting. Developmentally games provide a easy, fun way for children to tackle eye-hand coordination; manual dexterity; colour, number and shape recognition; grouping and counting; letter recognition, reading and more. 5. Games help develop motor skills Spending lots of time sitting (in class or in front of TV), their gross and fine motor skills can easily become neglected. Simple games like Twister, Simon Says and rope jumping develop gross motor skills, improving balance and flexibility. Board games need dexterity and improve fine motor skills, whereas balancing games offer a complex multi-sensory activity. Even if your child gets frustrated at first, encourage him to keep trying and he’ll learn to persevere! 6. Game playing stimulates intellectual development Einstein said “play is the highest form of research”. Letting kids figure out things on their own is part of gaming fun! Using reasoning, logic and planning in a fun environment allows kids to build important ‘brain skills’ that promote intelligence. Don’t be too quick to help if they are stumped, encourage and give small hints rather than saying what to do, or taking over. 7. Games can help release excess energy Racing games, tree-climbing, hopscotch, hide and seek get kids moving a lot more than TV or online-game time. Physical games allow them to expend excess energy (and feelings) in a healthy way that otherwise may spill out as ‘bad’ behaviour. 8. Playing games expands creativity, flexibility and imagination Tapping into a world of fantasy, games inspire creativity, with kids often inventing their own way of playing, making up new rules and inspiring them to create their own games. So give yourself a break moms and have some healthy fun gaming. The InnerMagic™ children’s self esteem game is a great developmental tool for the whole family. This interactive emotional intelligence game aimed at 6 to 12 year olds is played between a parent and one or two children and improves self esteem, emotional intelligence, expression, lifeskills and relationships. The game’s central focus is to offer children choices, while moving along rainbow coloured stars which pose real life questions and self esteem building activities, in order to get into each of the six developmental centers and perform a task to win a token. Cleverly designed, the game is fun and challenging, improving critical thinking, communication, decision making, literacy skills and problem solving while teaching children how to express and manage their feelings. Once children start playing, they can’t get enough of InnerMagic™ and parents too love seeing all the positive benefits the game brings. For more information about Carol’s excellent parenting book, Great Kids and the InnerMagic™ children’s game or to purchase your own copy visit the Carol Surya Website Today.

July 7, 2014

The Slippery Slope of Girls’ Friendships

Years ago, after I’d had my second son, I remember a friend (who had girls) saying to me that I was lucky to have boys, as when they’re teenagers, they’re a lot easier to handle than girls! Now that my boys are in their adolescent years (well, one is almost there) I realise there is some truth to that statement. Why, you may ask? Well, because of girls’ friendships. I have a niece who went through absolute hell for two years – she confessed to me years later that she actually contemplated suicide – and another who is going through a really difficult time right now. Why are girls’ friendships such a minefield? Girls appear to have a strict social hierarchy based on what society tells us is “ideal femininity”. Girls police each other on who is breaking the laws of appearance, clothing, interest in boys and personality. Up to about the age of ten (although it’s getting younger and younger), this isn’t a big issue, but when puberty begins to bud, it becomes more and more important to conform to these ideals. In a rather interesting theory by two professors of zoology at the University of Cambridge, it is suggested that females of a variety of species use passive aggressive or indirect tactics to thin out sexual competition. In their article published in the Philosophical Transactions of the Royal Society B, they postulate that females evolved to use a lower risk form of breeding aggression by forming exclusionary social groups or “cliques” and generally being mean to females they see as a sexual threat. Sound familiar? How does this affect girls’ behaviour? Girls are really hard on themselves and on each other. They constantly compare themselves to each other and to the totally unrealistic female ideals they see portrayed in the media. If they don’t match up (which is unlikely), they may feel down about themselves. During adolescence the need for acceptance and approval by peers is paramount. If they are socially rejected, it may lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms like eating disorders, cutting, drug/alcohol abuse or risky sexual behaviour. Girls should know what defines a healthy friendship and when to get out of a toxic friendship. Healthy friendships include qualities like mutual respect, trust, honesty, support, fairness/equality, separate identities and good communication. In unhealthy friendships, girls may be controlled, criticised and coerced into conforming to group standards they may not necessarily agree with. They should be able to differentiate between popular girls who are liked because they’re nice people, powerful girls who may be “popular” because they’re intimidating rather than likeable, and good leaders – who are able to recognise the value of individual girls who work as a team and are respectful and supportive of each other. Envy and jealousy are rampant diseases in girl culture, encouraged by social media platforms. Since society decrees that girls should be good and well behaved, these feelings lie hidden and fester inside them. There is a hidden culture of aggressiveness in girls, depicted in many teen movies including “Mean Girls” and written about in books such as “Reviving Ophelia”, “Queen Bees and Wannabes” and “Odd Girl Out”. Girls form exclusionary social cliques, and some – like the “Queen Bee” and her Court – are skilled at putting down, excluding and being nasty to girls who are perceived to be threatening. They weaken others’ friendships, thereby strengthening their own power and influence. This behaviour is known as Relational aggression (intentionally hurting someone by harming their relationships to others) and it’s prevalent in girl culture. It includes things like eye rolling, ignoring, building alliances, “bad” teasing and put-downs, spreading rumours and gossip, forming exclusive cliques and cyber bullying. It starts in about Grade 5 or 6 and peaks in Grade 8, at the beginning of high school. Fortunately, it tends to decrease later in high school as girls mature, their friendships become more stabilised and they learn to interact and support each other. Relational aggressive behaviour is usually surreptitious and flies under the radar of parents and teachers. Many times, the perpetrators are “popular” girls who have quite a following – a.k.a. “Queen Bees”. Targets often don’t understand what they did to cause the behaviour and take on some of the blame. As adults, we don’t always understand how devastating it can be for a young girl to have to deal with this kind of social rejection. Targets may feel totally alone and isolated. Many of these incidents are caused by misunderstandings or assumptions in turn caused by girls’ fear of direct conflict and possible isolation. Witnesses (bystanders) to this kind of relational aggressiveness are extremely important as they have the power to either enable the bullying to continue or stop it in its tracks by confronting the bully/bullies about their mean behaviour. What can targets do about it? Girls have to learn the art of direct communication and know that disagreements and confrontation in friendships are normal and healthy. Just like with other bullying, instead of keeping the pain of relational bullying or a breaking friendship to themselves, targets need to talk about it – to other friends and to adults who can offer advice and help them move on. They need to accept that although it is awful to go through, it is part of girl culture. They have to learn to be resilient and build up their self esteem again by keeping busy, pursuing their own unique talents and interests that make them feel happy and good about themselves and starting to make new, healthier and affirming friendships.

May 31, 2014

Empower your Child with Healthy Thinking Habits

How many of us teach our child to read, the times tables, how to ride a bicycle, cooking skills or manners? As parents we are constantly teaching, sometimes without even realising it. While children learn and absorb all that is being taught there is one common denominator that is being used. The Brain. Our thoughts are a soup of all sensory experiences reaching from today back to our formative years. For most of us, children included, memories and emotions from all different time frames pop up in our minds at random moments without explanation. This subconscious part of our brain is dominant when our minds drift, we daydream or perform actions on auto pilot. How often doesn’t that happen? 95% of the time. This can be distractive as well as destructive. So how can the youth take charge of their mind, their body and their life? Constructive training of the mind. When we learn something new we are in a heightened state of awareness, by repetition our conscious and alert mind steps back, yawns, and says “Been there done that” and so the automatic subconscious takes the front seat. The subconscious area of our brain, the holder of habits, is where all of our automatic responses arise from. Thus through repetition of constructive exercises the subconscious will ensure healthy reactions. For example, if a child repeats daily affirmations focused on current values, when posed with a challenge the automatic response will be, without thinking, ‘Yes I can’ rather than ‘No, I can’t’. During my creative work with thousands of drama students between ages four and eighteen years, along with my continuing experience as a full time mom I have found the following practices really work: Affirmations – “I am … “ (fill in the gaps with what the individual would like to enhance, the emphasis being on detail). Eg: instead of “I am clever”, rather “I am in control of my mind, I can easily understand maths sums”. Let the child write their own affirmation about what is important to them as this will empower them and assist them to remember it and repeat it daily. Breathing – Shortness of breath can add to high emotions and unclear thoughts. This brain refresher should be used throughout the day when needed: Breathe in deeply and slowly, fill your lungs completely and exhale completely, breathing slowly. Listening – Quieten the mind by listening like a sponge. For a period of ten minutes ask your child to not think of responses while some one else is talking, just listen. This encourages the child to be present in the moment and really absorb the information that is being relayed. Visualising – This tool uses the mind to assist in problem solving or reaching a specific goal. Target a specific area that the child wishes to change and/or improve. Create a scene that solves the problem or reaches the goal. The more details the better. The child should visualise the scene with eyes closed for at least five minutes. The more it is practiced the more effective it will be. Thought Control – A child tends to verbalise thoughts as they occur so it is easy to hear thought patterns. Monitor this and if the child is bashing the self down instead of building the self up stop him/her immediately. Explain, for example: “You can’t expect to win the prize for english if you keep judging and criticising your work”. Encourage and remind the child to stop a negative thought as it happens and replace it with an affirmation. Have your child make and place cards around the house as a reminder of the above. By regularly following these few easy steps you will give your child the gift of leading a fulfilled life through mature self-confidence, determination and inspiration. Dr Wayne Dyer, an American psychologist and international best seller of “When you change your thoughts, you change your life”, says: “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change”.

May 31, 2014

How can Food affect your Mood

As a parent, you will face many challenges as your children grow up, ensuring that you look after yourself physically will be a positive step in the right direction when it comes to coping with life. Mirror the lifestyle you want your children to lead so no better way than to start with your food choices. The bonus, you will feel stronger, healthier and even be happier!! Food is a major part of our lives, but everything you’re swigging, dipping, chomping down on, and sipping could be leading you straight into a sad state. These days, we are eating a lot of Unhappy Meals. Everyday foods void of important nutrients, minerals, and healthy fats are also laden with jaw-dropping levels of sugar and dangerous fats that research has linked to depression. The stress of modern-day life makes it easier to cave in to the temptations of fast food and convenience diet. Eat a Diet High in Nutrients – Nutrients in foods support the body’s repair, growth, and wellness. Nutrients we all need include vitamins, minerals, carbohydrates, protein, and even a small amount of fat. A deficiency in any of these nutrients lead to our bodies not working at full capacity — and can even cause illness. Fill Your Plate With Essential Antioxidants – Damaging molecules called free radicals are produced in our bodies during normal body functions — and these free radicals contribute to ageing and dysfunction. Antioxidants such as beta-carotene and vitamins C and E combat the effects of free radicals. Antioxidants have been shown to tie up these free radicals and take away their destructive power. Studies show that the brain is particularly at risk for free radical damage. Although there’s no way to stop free radicals completely, we can reduce their destructive effect on the body by eating foods rich in antioxidants as part of a healthy diet, including: Sources of beta-carotene: apricots, broccoli, carrots, peaches, pumpkin, spinach, sweet potato. Sources of vitamin C: blueberries, broccoli, grapefruit, kiwi, oranges, peppers, potatoes, strawberries, tomato. Sources of vitamin E: nuts and seeds, vegetable oils, wheat germ. Eat “Smart” Carbs for a Calming Effect – The connection between carbohydrates and mood is linked to the mood-boosting brain chemical, serotonin. Carbohydrate craving may be related to decreased serotonin activity, although experts are not sure if there is a link. So don’t shun carbs — just make smart choices. Limit sugary foods and opt for smart carbs, such as whole grains, fruits, vegetables, and legumes, which all contribute healthy carbs as well as fibre. Eat Protein-Rich Foods to Boost Alertness – Foods rich in protein, like turkey, tuna, or chicken, are rich in an amino acid called tyrosine. Tyrosine may help boost levels of the brain chemicals dopamine and norepinephrine. This boost helps you feel alert and makes it easier to concentrate. Try to include a protein source in your diet several times a day, especially when you need to clear your mind and boost your energy. Good sources of healthy proteins: beans and peas, lean beef, low-fat cheese, fish, milk, poultry, soy products, yogurt. Eat a Mediterranean-Type Diet – The Mediterranean diet is a balanced, healthy eating pattern that includes plenty of fruits, nuts, vegetables, cereals, legumes, and fish. A Spanish study, using data from 4,211 men and 5,459 women, found that rates of depression tended to increase as folate intake decreased. The same increase occurred for women — especially those who smoked or were physically active Folate is found in Mediterranean diet staples like legumes, nuts, many fruits, and particularly dark green vegetables. B12 can be found in all lean and low-fat animal products, such as fish and low-fat dairy products. Get Plenty of Vitamin D – A 2010 national study found that the likelihood of having depression is higher in people with deficiency in vitamin D compared to people who are sufficient in vitamin D. In another study, researchers from the University of Toronto noticed that people who were suffering from depression, particularly those with seasonal affective disorder, tended to improve as their levels of vitamin D in the body increased over the normal course of a year. Vitamin D receptors are found in the brain. Select Selenium-Rich Foods – Selenium is a mineral that is essential to good health. Studies have reported an association between low selenium intake and poorer moods, although evidence isn’t conclusive on whether supplementation can help. The good news is that foods rich in selenium are foods we should be eating anyway. They include: Beans and legumes Lean meat (lean pork and beef, skinless chicken and turkey) Low-fat dairy products Nuts and seeds (particularly brazil nuts) Seafood (oysters, clams, sardines, crab, saltwater fish, and freshwater fish) Whole grains (whole-grain pasta, brown rice, oatmeal, etc.) Include Omega-3 Fatty Acids in Your Diet – We know that omega-3 fatty acids have innumerable health benefits. Recently, scientists have revealed that a deficit of omega-3 fatty acids is associated with depression. In one study, researchers determined that societies that eat a small amount of omega-3 fatty acids have a higher prevalence of major depressive disorder than societies that get ample omega-3 fatty acids. Other studies show that people who infrequently eat fish, which is a rich source of omega-3 fatty acids, are more likely to suffer from depression. Sources of omega-3 fatty acids: fatty fish (anchovy, mackerel, salmon, sardines, shad, and tuna), flaxseed, and nuts. Sources alpha-linolenic acid (another type of omega-3 fatty acid): flaxseed, canola oil, soybean oil, walnuts, and dark green leafy vegetables. Watch Your Lifestyle Habits – Many people who are depressed also have problems with alcohol and/or drugs. Not only can alcohol and drugs interfere with mood, sleep, and motivation, they can also affect the effectiveness of your depression medications. In addition, drinks and foods containing caffeine can trigger anxiety and make it difficult to sleep at night. Cutting out caffeine or stopping caffeine after noon each day can also help you get a better night’s sleep. Stay at a Healthy Weight – Findings published in the journal of Clinical Psychology: Science and Practice,

May 22, 2014

The Magic of Melatonin

Is it really so easy? – Just give my child a magic pill? I wish I could create a magic formula that would make children sleep better at night. Imagine! You just sprinkle them with this magic fairy dust and they will happily travel to la-la land… Believe me, individuals (and companies in it for the big bucks) are continually trying: Just bathe your baby in these special salts Just feed your baby this special Night-Night baby food Just put on this light during the night Just switch on this special CD Just wrap them in this special blanket I’ve heard it all before… in fact, I tried most of this on my own child when he wasn’t sleeping. And while some studies have shown that melatonin can be helpful with autistic children or children with ADHD most babies and children do not need melatonin; they need to be taught good, independent sleep skills (which, unfortunately for us you can’t find in a magic formula. It takes hard work). Here is the scary part: because melatonin is contained naturally in some foods, the US Dietary Supplement Health and Education Act of 1994 allows it to be sold as a dietary supplement which does not need to be approved by the Food and Drug administration. This means that although Melatonin could possibly affect growth, sexual development and puberty and cause side effects like headaches, drowsiness and stomach aches it is not tested because it is seen as a “natural” “homeopathic” type medicine. (Gasp here!!!) But what is really alarming these days is the number of clients we work with that are giving their children sedative medication or a Melatonin supplement. The sad truth is that Melatonin is definitely not a long term solution for your child’s sleep problems. Do we really want to give our children something of which we can’t prove the side effects, of which we don’t know the long term effects and which cannot be proven to solve the underlying problem anyway? Consider that when we are born we have the most Melatonin in our bodies that we will ever have during our lifetime as it does get less as we grow older. So is this drug really the answer to our problems! My opinion? A resounding no! To read more about Melatonin and what it does click here

May 22, 2014

CAN YOUR WHITE NOISE MACHINE DAMAGE YOUR BABY’S HEARING?

A study in Paediatrics suggests that some noise machines can produce sounds so loud that they could potentially damage infants’ hearing and auditory development. If SIDS isn’t scary enough! Now we are potentially damaging our children by playing them white noise? As with all things baby, we thoroughly believe that white noise should be approached with a balanced view. The study states that loud noise (85dB)…like putting a hair drier or blasting music 12″ from a baby’s head for 8 hours straight…is potentially damaging to a baby’s hearing. Unfortunately, this article is being used to scare parents and ignores the key benefits of using white noise. When you work on changing your baby’s sleep habits, start where you want to end. In affect this means don’t automatically include white noise in your sleep regime if you don’t have any reason to other than “everybody’s doing it”. Tired parents always need to be reminded of the safe way to do things. Swaddling is great, but you don’t want to overheat a baby or restrict the hips or do it past 8 weeks…car seats are great, but they can actually cause infant deaths if not properly installed. And similar caveats are true for white noise. Surprisingly, babies cry usually reach levels up to 100 dB (as loud as a power lawnmower…and 10 times louder than a hair drier ). Loud sounds, like vacuum cleaner and hair drier sounds, have been recommended by paediatricians and parenting books for decades to calm fussy babies. But, it is very important to remind parents to only use very loud noise during infant crying. However, the new study just released by the journal Paediatrics omitted 3 critical points as Doctor Karb points out: In the womb, all babies are exposed to the sound of whooshing through the arteries…that is louder than a vacuum cleaner (measured at 75-92dB)…24/7. Moderate sound – used all night – is perfectly safe and has been shown to be helpful in boosting sleep, which is why so many families use white noise CDs and downloads. Noise injury is primarily related to the high pitch of sound. A pitch, which with most infant white noise machines are not reached. When considering recommending white noise for babies, it is extremely important to consider the potential life saving benefits of proper sleep, which in return means the benefits of using white noise machines correctly. Poor infant sleep causes parent exhaustion..and that leads to many very dangerous situations…including postpartum depression, maternal obesity, child abuse and sleep deaths because the exhausted parents put the baby on the stomach or bring the baby into their bed…which causes ~1000 accidental suffocation deaths/year. By enhancing sleep (and reducing crying) low pitched, rumbly white noise may help prevent these very serious problems. So once again we have to weigh our two options up against each other. So when a baby cries, increase sound level – for a few minutes – to the level of a vacuum cleaner. And, for safe naps and all night sleeping keep the sound about the level of a soft shower IF your baby needs it. (I encourage you to place the sound within a few feet of the baby’s sleep area…and to listen to the sound themselves…to judge whether it is too loud.) I want to reiterate again that white noise should only be used in the case where it is needed. You don’t have to start off with a white noise machine just because your friend uses one with her baby. White noise in itself will never teach your baby to sleep! Article Credit: Doctor Karb from the happiest Happy, Education Association

May 3, 2014

Food to Boost Brain Power

You are what you eat. Fuel your brain with the right foods to boost mental stamina and improve memory and learning. Did you know that even though your brain is the body’s command centre, it only accounts for about two percent of your total body weight? If you eat the right amount of calories to maintain your weight, about 20 percent of that energy is used to power up your grey matter. The brain comprises of billions of neurons which send and receive messages from the entire nervous system. Signals are passed from one neuron to the next and certain nutrients are needed to produce neurotransmitters which make the jump between the neurons. Serotonin, dopamine and acetylcholine are common neurotransmitters that can have a big impact on your mood, your sleep patterns, mental sharpness and thought processes. The continual activity within the brain requires a high level of energy to keep going. It’s your body’s job to supply its control centre with a good stream of glucose energy. The right nutrients can help to boost mental productivity and help your body cope better with stress and the demands of a busy modern lifestyle. Omega-3 fatty acids are vital for good brain development. These good fats help to regulate serotonin levels in the brain, of which a low level may be linked to depression, mood swings and lethargy. Omega-3s improves mental sharpness and concentration. DHA, one form of omega-3, is found in oily fish like salmon, herring, trout, sardines and tuna. Other foods high in omega-3 are flax seeds, walnuts, olive oil, green leafy vegetables, strawberries and avocados. B-vitamins Vitamins in the B-range can help to improve mental stamina and memory and relieve the affects of mental exhaustion and depression. Foods rich in vitamin B include vegetables like cabbage, cauliflower and broccoli or high protein foods, like meat, egg yolk or peanuts. Whole grain foods are rich in vitamin B6, which plays an important part in synthesising some of the neurotransmitters. Bananas are often labelled as brain food because they are high in vitamin B6, contain potassium and provide glucose energy for the brain. Brown rice and oatmeal are good sources of vitamin B6 and some bread and cereals may be fortified with B12. Oysters contain a good amount of vitamin B12 and they are rich in zinc and iron, other important elements for the brain. Folic acid (vitamin B9), is essential for the development of a baby’s brain and nervous system during pregnancy. Leafy green vegetables and liver are high in folic acid. Protein and Carbs Foods high in proteins also help to maintain a healthy brain function and good mental performance for learning. Good protein brain food includes eggs, almonds, walnuts, meat, soybeans, milk and other dairy products. Proteins can also be paired with carbohydrates to supply the brain with a good boost of glucose energy. Food combinations of protein and carbs, like yoghurt with muesli and nuts or whole wheat toast and a scrambled egg are good breakfast choices. Antioxidants Antioxidants are the protectors of the brain and nervous system and guard against ‘free radicals’ or molecules which damage cells and contribute to aging. Antioxidants also help to improve memory and cognitive ability of the brain. Foods rich in antioxidants include spinach, tomatoes, broccoli, strawberries, raisins, plums, pecans, sunflower seeds, dates, red kidney beans and the cocoa bean. Whatever foods you choose to power your body and your brain, it is always important to eat a balanced diet, with food choices from the different groups. Also remember to reach for that refreshing glass of water — it’s essential for your brain! Just as dehydration adversely affects many different body functions, a lack of water also causes mental fatigue.

May 1, 2014

Dyslexia Symptoms and Signs: How to Recognize Dyslexia

“Deer momee and dadee I bo not wont to do to shool eny more becouse the children ar lafing at me. I canot reed pleese help me your sun david” David is not a dunce. In fact, according to the evaluations of a few professionals, he is rather intelligent. Yet he certainly has a problem, and he shares his problem with millions of other children and adults. David is dyslexic. The term “dyslexia” was introduced in 1884 by the German ophthalmologist, R. Berlin. He coined it from the Greek words dys meaning ill or difficult and lexis meaning word, and used it to describe a specific disturbance of reading in the absence of pathological conditions in the visual organs. In a later publication, in 1887, Berlin stated that dyslexia, “presuming right handedness,” is caused by a left-sided cerebral lesion. He spoke of “word-blindness” and detailed his observations with six patients with brain lesions who had full command over verbal communications but had lost the ability to read. In the century to follow the narrow definition Berlin attached to the term dyslexia would broaden. Today the term dyslexia is frequently used to refer to a “normal” child — or adult — who seems much brighter than what his reading and written work suggest. While the term is mostly used to describe a severe reading problem, there has been little agreement in the literature or in practice concerning the definition of severe or the specific distinguishing characteristics that differentiate dyslexia from other reading problems. Instead of getting involved in the wrangling over a definition, one could simply use the “symptoms” below as an indication that a child has a reading problem and therefore needs help. DIRECTIONAL CONFUSION Directional confusion may take a number of forms, from being uncertain of which is left and right to being unable to read a map accurately, says Dr. Beve Hornsby in her book Overcoming Dyslexia. A child should know his left and right by the age of five, and be able to distinguish someone else’s by the age of seven. Directional confusion affects other concepts such as up and down, top and bottom, compass directions, keeping one’s place when playing games, being able to copy the gym teacher’s movements when he is facing you, and so on. As many as eight out of ten severely dyslexic children have directional confusion. The percentage is lower for those with a mild condition, she says. Directional confusion is the reason for reversing of letters, whole words or numbers, or for so-called mirror writing. The following symptoms indicate directional confusion: The dyslexic may reverse letters like b and d, or p and q, either when reading or writing. He may invert letters, reading or writing n as u, m as w, d as q, p as b, f as t. He may read or write words like no for on, rat for tar, won for now, saw for was. He may read or write 17 for 71. He may mirror write letters, numbers and words. SEQUENCING DIFFICULTIES Many dyslexics have trouble with sequencing, i.e. perceiving something in sequence and also remembering the sequence. Naturally this will affect their ability to read and spell correctly. After all, every word consists of letters in a specific sequence. In order to read one has to perceive the letters in sequence, and also remember what word is represented by the sequence of letters in question. By simply changing the sequence of the letters in name, it can become mean or amen. The following are a few of the dyslexia symptoms that indicate sequencing difficulties: When reading, the dyslexic may put letters in the wrong order, reading felt as left, act as cat, reserve as reverse, expect as except. He may put syllables in the wrong order, reading animal as ‘aminal’, enemy as ’emeny’. He may put words in the wrong order, reading are there for there are. The dyslexic may write letters in the wrong order, spelling Simon as ‘Siomn’, time as ‘tiem’, child as ‘chidl’. He may omit letters, i.e. reading or writing cat for cart, wet for went, sing for string. Dyslexics may also have trouble remembering the order of the alphabet, strings of numbers, for example telephone numbers, the months of a year, the seasons, and events in the day. Younger children may also find it hard to remember the days of the week. Some are unable to repeat longer words orally without getting the syllables in the wrong order, for example words like preliminary and statistical. DIFFICULTIES WITH THE LITTLE WORDS A frequent comment made by parents of children struggling with their reading is, “He is so careless, he gets the big difficult words, but keeps making silly mistakes on all the little ones.” Certainly, the poor reader gets stuck on difficult words, but many do seem to make things worse by making mistakes on simple words they should be able to manage — like ‘if’, ‘to’, ‘and’. The following are indications of problems with the little words: Misreads little words, such as a for and, the for a, from for for, then for there, were for with. Omits or reads twice little words like the, and, but, in. Adds little words which do not appear in the text. It is important to note that this is extremely common, and not a sign that a child is particularly careless or lazy. LATE TALKING Research has revealed a dramatic link between the abnormal development of spoken language and learning disabilities such as dyslexia. The following are just a few examples: A study in 1970 of Doctor Renate Valtin of Germany, based on one hundred pairs of dyslexic and normal children, found indications of backwardness in speech development and a greater frequency of speech disturbances among dyslexics than among normal children. According to Doctor Beve Hornsby, author of Overcoming Dyslexia, about 60 percent of dyslexics were late talkers. In her book Learning Disabilities, author Janet Lerner states, “language problems of one

April 27, 2014

Cognitive Skills Determine Learning Ability

Research has shown that cognitive skills are a determining factor of an individual’s learning ability. Cognitive skills are mental skills that are used in the process of acquiring knowledge; according to Oxfordlearning.com the skills that “separate the good learners from the so-so learners.” In essence, when cognitive skills are strong, learning is fast and easy. When cognitive skills are weak, learning becomes a struggle. Many children become frustrated and find schoolwork difficult because they do not have the cognitive skills required to process information properly. Many employees find themselves stuck in dead-end jobs that do not tap into their true vocational potential due to weak cognitive skills. In the later years of life, a lack of cognitive skills — poor concentration, the inability to focus, and memory loss — is a common problem that accompanies us. It should be noted that, irrespective of age, cognitive skills can be improved with the right training. Weak cognitive skills can be strengthened, and normal cognitive skills can be enhanced to increase ease and performance in learning. The following cognitive skills are the most important: Concentration Concentration is the ability to focus the attention on one single thought or subject, excluding everything else from the field of awareness. It is one of the most important abilities one should possess, as nothing great can be achieved without it. Students need to concentrate and focus on completing a homework assignment, a project, or review for a test in order to excel in school, learn the subject, and get good grades. Athletes need to concentrate on performance, execution, and strategy in order to do their best and overcome their opponent. Entrepreneurs need to concentrate on all the factors involved in starting a new business and promoting their product or service. They need to do this in order to get their idea off the ground and make their enterprise into a profitable entity. Business leaders need to concentrate on their company mission, vision, and strategies, as well as the work at hand, in order to stay ahead of their competitors. Workers need to concentrate on their jobs and fulfilling their supervisor’s goals, in order to complete projects and advance in their careers. Improving the ability to concentrate allows a person to avoid the problems, embarrassment, and difficulties that occur when the mind wanders. Better concentration makes studying easier and speeds up comprehension. It enables one to take advantage of the social and business opportunities that arise when individuals are fully attuned to the world around them. It helps one to focus on one’s goals and achieve them more easily. Perception Sensation is the pickup of information by our sensory receptors, for example the eyes, ears, skin, nostrils, and tongue. In vision, sensation occurs as rays of light are collected by the two eyes and focused on the retina. In hearing, sensation occurs as waves of pulsating air are collected by the outer ear and transmitted through the bones of the middle ear to the cochlear nerve. Perception, on the other hand, is the interpretation of what is sensed. The physical events transmitted to the retina may be interpreted as a particular color, pattern, or shape. The physical events picked up by the ear may be interpreted as musical sounds, a human voice, noise, and so forth. Lack of experience may cause a person to misinterpret what he has sensed. In other words, perception represents our apprehension of a present situation in terms of our past experiences, or, as stated by the philosopher Immanuel Kant (1724-1804): “We see things not as they are but as we are.” Deficits in visual perception can hinder a person’s ability to make sense of information received through the eyes, while deficits in auditory perception interferes with an individual’s ability to analyze or make sense of information received through the ears. A classic example of a deficit in visual perception is the child who confuses letters such as b, d, p and q. Many adults find their reading speed to be inadequate as a result of underlying perceptual deficits. By improving accuracy and speed of perception, one is able to absorb and process information accurately and quickly. Reading speed will also improve and reading problems can be overcome. Memory Memory is probably the most important of all cognitive functions. Roughly speaking, the sensory register concerns memories that last no more than about a second or two. If a line of print were flashed at you very rapidly, say, for one-tenth of a second, all the letters you can visualize for a brief moment after that presentation constitute the sensory register. When you are trying to recall a telephone number that was heard a few seconds earlier, the name of a person who has just been introduced, or the substance of the remarks just made by a teacher in class, you are calling on short-term memory, or working memory. This lasts from a few seconds to a minute; the exact amount of time may vary somewhat. You need this kind of memory to retain ideas and thoughts as you work on problems. In writing a letter, for example, you must be able to keep the last sentence in mind as you compose the next. To solve an arithmetic problem like (3 X 3) + (4 X 2) in your head, you need to keep the intermediate results in mind (i.e., 3 X 3 = 9) to be able to solve the entire problem. A poor short-term memory may lead to difficulties in processing, understanding and organization. By improving one’s short-term memory, one is better able to process, understand and organize incoming information. Long-term memory is the ability to store information and later retrieve it, and lasts from a minute or so to weeks or even years. From long-term memory you can recall general information about the world that you learned on previous occasions, memory for specific past experiences, specific rules previously learned, and the like. Research has shown that, on average, within 24 hours

April 13, 2014

Raising a Food Smart Kid

I often find myself reminding parents that children learn to eat much in the same way that they learn to walk, talk, read and write. It is with encouragement and by example that children learn and this applies to healthy eating habits as well. Children will experience hunger and through a process of introducing solids to complement a once milk only diet, children learn to chew and swallow with relative ease. Making healthy food choices is not, however a natural instinct. When given a choice, most young children would choose the least healthy option. The responsibility of maintaining a nutritionally sound diet, therefore, remains the responsibility of the parent. While you cannot expect children to be responsible for their food choices, you can certainly teach them how to eat healthily by ensuring that you: 1. Provide a variety of healthy foods at meal times. This might seem fairly obvious but by presenting a healthy, well balanced plate of food, you are teaching without words. Children cannot be expected to choose healthy foods without exposure from an early age. 2. Eat as many meals as possible together as a family. Meal times should be a positive experience as they are a great opportunity to promote a healthy relationship with food. Shared meals are also a perfect opportunity to set an example as parents. 3. Set the example for healthy eating. If you do not eat something, you cannot expect your children to eat it. At the same time, eliminating foods from your children’s diet based on parental preferences is not advisable. Each different food offers a different benefit and it is therefore important to present your children with the opportunity to eat a varied diet. If you are not willing to compromise on occasion, creativity will be essential. Use the lunch box if necessary. 4. The option to make a healthy choice must always be available. Even if your children do not like vegetables, make them and serve them. It is best to pair one liked vegetable with a not-so-liked vegetable (just 1/2 a cup will do). Do not force your children to eat it but do not allow them to dictate what is served. Then be sure to eat that vegetable off your own plate. 5. Educate your children in fun and creative ways. Do not leave the responsibly of nutrition education and creating healthy eating habits to your child’s school teachers. While lessons on healthy eating might be covered, they cannot be revisited sufficiently nor can they have value without the daily practice of healthy eating. Growing vegetables with your children can increase their interest and the likelihood of consumption. It need not be a very big garden, Start with green beans, cherry tomatoes or spinach. Nurturing vegetables will nurture responsibility. Involve your children in shopping and food preparation with age appropriate activities. Weighing the fruit and vegetables is a task you can delegate to children from a fairly young age. Chopping veggies or setting the table are subtle ways of encouraging the intake of healthy foods and introducing children to the responsibility that good nutrition requires. Involve your children in weekly menu planning and within reason, allow them to the choose meals they would like to eat but you must have the final say and be sure to include the vegetables they may intend to avoid. Planning a weekly menu can encourage variety and open the door for discussions about food and healthy eating, outside of meal times. 6. Do not make a fuss of your child’s eating habits. As mentioned above, positive, relaxing meal times are very important and I really cannot stress enough just how vital it is not to create issues surrounding food. Children will not starve themselves easily but if you allow them to use food to manipulate you, they will not hesitate. As I said, the responsibility lies with the parents and this includes control. Do not force a child to finish their food or punish them for not doing so. Never use treat foods as a punishment or reward. Making the effort to help your children develop healthy eating habits from the get go and subtly encouraging them to make healthy choices will reap untold rewards.

April 10, 2014

Reduce Stress by Sorting Out Your Finances

The majority of parental problems that I see in my practice are exacerbated by stress, and what can be more stressful than sinking into debt. So, as the financial year comes to a close, here are some tips to sort out your finances and start the new financial year in a less stressful and more kid-friendly way! The first step in sorting out your finances is to know what they are. Print out your bank statements and credit card statements and make a list of all the income and expenses that you have every month. Most people avoid this simple activity and would rather stay in the dark, but facing the truth is way less stressful than waking up one day to find out you’re bankrupt! So take a deep breath and just do it!! You need to know your income and expenses if you are to create a successful budget and stick to it, and this is step number two. Work out your essentials each month and what they come to and always make sure that you are putting some money away every month into a savings account, or some extra money into your bond. If you find that you are overspending and don’t have any “disposable income” at the end of the month, relax. Acknowledge this and also that you are not alone – the majority of parents find themselves in this position. Here are some tips to sorting this out by bringing your expenses down: Cut up your account cards. If you can’t afford something, you shouldn’t be buying it. The time will come when you’ve saved enough and can treat yourself, but as much as possible, never use credit – and definitely don’t use credit to buy your groceries. Along the same lines, put your credit card in a glass of water in the freezer. If you really need it, it’s still there, but you won’t make impulse purchases if you need to wait for it to defrost first. Look at the debit orders you have – see if you can decrease your insurance, call your security company and ask them to re-look a your monthly fees, cancel any unnecessary memberships. If you haven’t been to the gym in 6 months, make a decision to go or see if you can sell your membership. Cell phones! Wow! My husband and I just halved our phone bills by changing service providers. If your contract is at its end, don’t just automatically upgrade with the same provider – shop around, look for specials, ask for discounts. And if you’ve already got 5 phones at home, take a contract without a phone – if you add up the monthly payments and see what you’re really paying for that phone after two years you might want to rethink. Beware, too, of getting to the end of your contract and not upgrading or changing, as you are then still paying the monthly amount for the phone even though you’ve finished paying it off. Take note of the cappuccino factor. This is the name given to those little spendings that you do regularly and don’t think they amount to much. Like the cappuccino you buy on the way to work. Do this little exercise: Take one thing that you don’t really need but buy regularly – the coffee out, the cigarettes, the bar of chocolate. Now multiply the cost of this by the number of times you purchase it in a week. Then times that by the 4 weeks in a month, then by the 12 months in a year, and then by 10 years (and that’s not even including inflation, interest etc). You’ll be amazed by how much you could save over ten years just by cutting out that one thing… who knows, you could even be a millionaire!! Awareness – of your spending habits, your shopping habits, your eating habits. Look at your statements and see where the money is going. Are you eating out too much? Could you be shopping at a less expensive store? Are your kids wearing name brands when a regular t-shirt could do?! Shop, eat and live consciously. This is quite a task, I know, but it’s very empowering when you get it under control. And you, your partner and your kids will benefit in the long run. Think of all those restful nights NOT worrying about the bills!!

April 5, 2014

Happy Parent, Happy Child

Two pianos were sitting next to each other in a room. A person sitting at one piano pressed one key, causing a tone to fill the air. Instantly, the string responsible for creating the same tone on the OTHER piano began to vibrate. This isn’t the start of a joke, but an experiment that has been tested by physics experts. The tone created by the first piano is a wave of vibrations that are absorbed by the strings on the other piano. The one string on that other piano capable of producing the same tone that filled the air, responds by amplifying its own vibration. People behave in a similar manner as pianos. When one person enters a room expressing emotion, it is quite likely that one or more other persons in that room are likely to instantly take on that emotion. Has this ever happened to you; your significant other or child began to express an intensified level of joy, excitement, worry, fear or anger, and before you realized it, you too were feeling a similar sense of that same emotion? We are emotional creatures and we are each capable of taking on the emotion of someone we care about. A close friend stops by with sad news and instantly we feel sad. Our child arrives home announcing ecstatically that she’s won an award and we too are now feeling great joy. Our significant other wakes up in a bad mood and we seem to absorb those vibrations, suddenly becoming moody ourselves. The parents I work with complain to me about their children; the kids won’t cooperate, they scream “NO” at their parents, they talk back, they have frequent meltdowns, and they won’t help out, just to name a few of the common challenges. Some of the common causes of these types of frustrating behaviors are created by the parents, and include: a lack of consistency in rules, little or no boundaries, talking too much, too many outside activities for the kids to keep up with, too much ‘screen time,’ and not enough parent/child connection time. But one of the biggest causes is a lack of peace and calmness in the adults who care for the children. Like the pianos, parents who have not been taking good care of themselves transmit negative frequencies to their families and then wonder why they aren’t getting the level of cooperation and peacefulness they desire. If you want peaceful children, you must first become a peaceful parent. When I prescribe this solution to some parents however, I’m quickly met with resistance. I hear comments such as, “When I can afford a nanny or a housekeeper, then I can become more calm and peaceful.” I remember the challenge myself; employed full-time, working hard to maintain a peaceful home, and raising three young children who liked to fight and challenge me every step of the way. I realized that it was my responsibility to do whatever it took to learn how to calm myself and to take better care of me. I quickly discovered that during weeks when I made time to take care of myself physically, spiritually, socially, and emotionally, it became easier for me to know how to handle situations at home and my children became easier to care for. So what will YOU do this week to take better care of you? Start by giving yourself permission to MAKE the time and follow through.

April 3, 2014

What is Cognitive Behavioural Coaching and how can it help your child?

The new buzzword in almost any community is Life Coaching. If you do not have a life coach, then there must be “something wrong”. But what is it about having a life coach that is creating such hype? I guess it would be the basic premise of psychodynamic psychology, namely, having an objective opinion guiding you through life’s ups and downs. But in this case you may as well ring up your best friend, its easier and cheaper. So I delved and dug around a little and in jolly old London I came across a new form of life coaching that your best friend certainly can’t help you with and I could not ignore. Three quarters of the children I have met are medicated. The anxiety and depression levels are at an all time high. When I was in school I had never heard of the term anxiety, and now nearly every child is talking about panic attacks and O.C.D. Children in my experience do not like to see “psychologists” in the classic sense of the word. However children see coaches all the time, netball coaches, cricket coaches, and soccer coaches to name a few. So why not take your child to a Cognitive coach? The effects are mind blowing: the children are excited. The teachers are excited, but more than anyone the parents are excited. Someone to actually help guide his or her children. But not just guide them; teach them actual skills to handle actual problems. What is Cognitive Behavioural Coaching? This is not classic coaching or individualised therapy; this is a hybrid approach that adopts a Cognitive Behavioural methodology to modify perceptions and emotions with the goal of transforming behavioural output for the betterment of the individual. It will enable the control of emotions, thoughts and self defeating beliefs that will lead to the promotion of flexible techniques to handle any stress or pressure that is inflicted on the people of today. It aims to enhance feelings of wellbeing and to equip individuals with the tools necessary to handle present problems and future challenges by taking control of their thoughts and thus control of their emotions, behaviours and life. When is Cognitive Behavioural Coaching Effective? Cognitive behavioural coaching is generally short-term and concentrated on helping clients deal with a very specific problem. During the course of treatment, people learn how to identify and change negative or distressing thought patterns that have a negative influence on behaviour. CBC is commonly used to handle a wide range of disorders including phobias, addiction, depression and anxiety. It is a new methodology based on research and it may just be the answer parents have been so desperately seeking

March 8, 2014

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