It is estimated that around 10 million – or 20% – of South Africans are abusing substances. This is according to the South African Society of Psychiatrists. Whether it is alcohol, codeine, dagga, heroin or other drugs it’s a very worrying statistic that costs the private and public healthcare industry millions annually in rehabilitation and recovery.
Be honest and disclose all information. Don’t forget to read the questionnaire carefully and regardless of whether you think it’s important or not, or whether the medical condition was years previously, include it in your application
Access to quality healthcare remains a priority for South Africans. However, with healthcare costs consistently outpacing inflation, the challenge for private medical schemes remains finding the right balance between providing a high level of value and care for members, while managing costs effectively.
‘South Africa is heading for a disaster if the number of people living with chronic lifestyle diseases does not change.’ That’s what both the Human Sciences Research Council (HSRC) and the Medical Research Council warned two years ago. The Council described the problem of these non-communicable diseases as an ‘emerging epidemic’. If you look at the exponential growth of chronic lifestyle diseases then it is not difficult to understand why former Minister of Health, Dr Aaron Motsoaledi, said chronic diseases such as hypertension and diabetes are putting a huge strain on the country’s health care system. Obesity and being overweight are major risk factors for the development of chronic diseases. Testing for lifestyle diseases such as diabetes and heart disease is essential in the face of a steadily deteriorating health status in our country. Lee Callakoppen, Principal Officer of Bonitas Medical Fund says, ‘Get tested, know your numbers and take action now!’ The Bonitas Clinical Team explain why you need to keep your finger on the pulse of your ‘big four’ wellness numbers and what they are. Cholesterol What is cholesterol? It is a soft, waxy substance – one of the blood fats made naturally in the body. It helps to form cells, hormones and bile (that helps us digest food). Cholesterol is found mostly in animal products such as meat, cream and butter. What is high cholesterol? This is when you have too much ‘bad’ cholesterol in your blood. This, in turn, can cause narrowing and blockages of the arteries – the blood vessels that carry blood to your heart muscle and to other parts of your body. In time, the narrowing of the arteries to your heart can lead to a heart attack, while blockages in the arteries of your brain can cause a stroke. The test Called a fasting lipogram it measures the exact amount of different types of cholesterol you have. Good to know If your total cholesterol is greater than 5mmol/L on your fasting lipogram this indicates raised cholesterol Your low density lipoprotein (LDL) – the ‘bad cholesterol’ – should not be greater than 3mmol/L. LDL causes the build-up of cholesterol in the arteries which means a greater chance of heart disease High density lipoprotein (HDL), if less than 1.2mmol/L, means you don’t have enough good cholesterol which prevents build up in the arteries and transports cholesterol to the liver If your triglycerides (fat stored in the body) are higher than 1.5mmol/l, this is also indicative of a possible cholesterol problem. Weight and BMI Your Body Mass Indicator (BMI) calculator checks if you’re at a healthy weight. The test You can calculate yours by: Dividing your weight in kilograms (kg) by your height in metres (m) Then dividing the answer by your height again to get your BMI. Underweight less than 18.5 Normal weight 18.5 – 24.9 Overweight 25 – 29.9 Obese 30 or greater Diabetes What is diabetes? Our bodies produce insulin all day – a hormone that creates energy by converting sugar, starches and other foods. Without insulin, cells cannot absorb sugar (glucose), which they need to produce energy. When there isn’t enough of this hormone in your body, or it’s not used as it should be, sugar (or ‘glucose’) can’t be moved to your other body cells to supply them with energy. This means that you have higher than normal blood-glucose levels, resulting in diabetes.There are two main types of diabetes: Type 1 and Type 2. They are different conditions but are both serious and need to be treated and managed properly. Type 1 diabetes occurs when the pancreas stops producing insulin. It usually starts very quickly and in younger people. If you have Type 1 diabetes you need insulin injections to survive as well as having a carefully balanced food intake and exercise programme Type 2 diabetes (formerly called adult-onset or non-insulin-dependent diabetes) occurs when the pancreas makes too little insulin or your body can’t use the insulin effectively. It usually develops in adulthood and is often caused by being overweight and not exercising. Approximately 85–90% of all people with diabetes have Type 2 and many people who have this condition are undiagnosed. This can result in serious damage to the delicate parts of the body and lead to blindness, heart attackstroke, kidney failure, impotence and amputation so it’s vital to be checked. The tests Test 1: The Fasting blood glucose test – blood glucose is taken before you eat in the morning. Normal 3.9 to 5.5 mmols/l Prediabetic or Impaired Glucose Tolerance 5.6 to 7.0 mmol/l Diabetic More than 7.0 mmol/l Test 2: HbA1c test. The HbA1c levels determine your blood sugar control over time. Normal Less than 6% Prediabetic 6 – 6.4% Diabetic 6.5% or more Blood pressure What is blood pressure? Blood pressure is the pressure of blood in your arteries – the blood vessels that carry blood away from your heart. The blood pressures numbers mean the following: The first (or top) number is your systolic blood pressure. It is the highest level your blood pressure reaches when your heart beats. The bottom figure is your diastolic blood pressure and is the lowest pressure exerted as your heart relaxes between beats. What is high blood pressure? High blood pressure or hypertension is when blood pressure stays elevated over time. Hypertension is often known as the “silent killer”, since nearly 33% of people who have it, don’t know it. The only way to know if you have high blood pressure is to have yours measured. Range Normal 120/80 to 129/84 Upper end of Normal 130/85 to 139/89 Mild hypertension 140/90 to 159/99 Moderate hypertension 160/100 to 179/109 Severe hypertension More than 180/110 If your blood pressure is too high, it puts extra strain on your arteries (and your heart) and if it’s not treated, hypertension can cause kidney failure, eye problems, heart disease and stroke. Callakoppen says, ‘When you consider that 1 in every 3 people in South African has high blood pressure and every 8 minutes 1 South African has
Lifestyles or Non-Communicable Diseases (NCDs) – such as diabetes – have become an epidemic in South Africa which is why preventative and managed healthcare has become all important. Whether you rely on the public or private healthcare system it is critical that you manage your health and lead a healthy lifestyle, to prevent long term illness. Cardiovascular (heart attacks and stroke), cancer, chronic respiratory disease and diabetes are on the increase and responsible for the high cost burden of healthcare. For the around 20% (just under 8.9 million) South Africans who are on private medical aid schemes, managing their medical expenses correctly is important if they want to avoid unnecessary out of pocket expenses and make their medical benefits last longer. It also helps them understand the cost associated with the healthcare services they receive and the benefits associated with the plan they have elected. Here are the five tips from Lee Callakoppen, Principal Officer of Bonitas Medical Fund on how you can stretch your medical benefits. 1. Use Designated Service Providers or networks Medical schemes negotiate preferential rates with providers – known as Dedicated Service Providers (DSPs) – who have partnered with them. This allows schemes to ensure that members get the best quality services at the most cost-effective rate so that the benefits are optimised and the scheme at large is sustainable. So if you use a network hospital, doctor or pharmacy you will not be charged more than the agreed rate. This will help you avoid co-payments and make your medical aid last longer. So, to reduce co-payments and even avoid them altogether, find a healthcare professional on your schemes network. 2. Go generic Use generic medicines which have the same active ingredient, strength and dosage as the original brands and are as effective. Most pharmacists offer a generic option, especially for chronic medication. Medical schemes are more likely to pay in full for generic medicine. Pharmacists are also able to provide sound medical advice on problems such as rashes, colds or illnesses that are not severe, simply ask and buy the recommended over-the-country medicine to save on a visit to the doctor. 3. Managed Care benefits Some schemes offer programmes to help you manage severe chronic conditions such as cancer, diabetes and HIV/AIDS. These programmes are usually covered from the risk portion of your medical contribution and are not funded from your savings account. They help you use your benefits to maximum advantage while ensuring you receive quality care by using specific providers. Other benefits – such as maternity consultations, wellness benefits, preventative care and dentistry – are also paid from risk by some schemes. Again giving you more value for money and are in addition to your savings and day-to-day benefits. Carefully read through what your plan offers and choose wisely to make sure you find the right plan to suit your specific healthcare needs 4. Know the facts If you do need to be hospitalised and it’s not an emergency ensure that it’s on your medical aid’s DSP list. Talk to your doctor or specialist to find out all the facts in terms of what they will be charging and compare this to what your scheme will cover. If the difference is substantial, negotiate. Approach your doctor and ask if they are prepared to adjust their fee. Alternatively, you can also check if there are other healthcare providers on your scheme’s network that will charge you a better rate. You can also avoid the unwelcome surprise of a co-payment or sub-limits by: Making sure you obtain pre-authorisation Making sure the medical practitioner uses the correct ICD-10 codes Checking what additional costs will apply (if any), what costs will be covered and how you can avoid these. 5. Keep moving One of the best ways to manage your health and the associated costs, is to live a healthy lifestyle and this includes getting enough exercise. Try different exercise routines and find one that works for you. Whether it is a regular short power walk, playing tennis or soccer, riding a bike or attending a yoga or pilates class, it will be beneficial to your mental and physical wellbeing. ‘Be informed and make good and less costly healthcare decisions,’ says Callakoppen. ‘Your health is important, so take time to research and understand the medical aid plan you are on. Read the information sent to you by the scheme or your broker, including the fine print and, if you don’t understand some of the terms, speak to your broker or phone the customer care line. Understand and know your rights in terms of healthcare cover, this will go a long way in helping you make the most of your benefits.’
Going through a divorce can be extremely harrowing and stressful, not just for the couple themselves but also for their children. And, given the divorce statistics released recently by StatsSA, divorce is on the increase. More than 25 390 divorce papers were filed in 2017, four in 10 divorces came from marriages that lasted less than 10 years and 55,6% involved children. Part of the anxiety is financial which can be exacerbated, depending on whether you are married in community of property have an ante nuptial agreement with or without an accrual clause. It can be very difficult going through the nitty-gritty details, especially when emotions are high. There are a lot of factors to consider, including how to divide up property and other assets, child care and support and, just as important, healthcare. Divorce can seriously impact the healthcare cover you might have previously enjoyed, especially if you are your children were on a joint medical aid, with one partner being the main member and the rest of the family listed as dependants. We put a few questions to Lee Callakoppen, Principal Officer of Bonitas Medical Fund to help you make sure have the right information and follow the correct procedures to ensure your healthcare is not compromised during divorce proceedings. What is the correct process to follow when getting divorced and taking a dependant off your medical aid? All changes in dependency must be sent through to the medical aid. You are usually required to fill in a form regarding this and provide supporting documents. In instances of a divorce, you will need to provide the divorce settlement to your medical aid together with your form. Is there a notice period required? Usually changes are effected within 30 days, which means you do need to allow time for the change to take place. What are the rights of the dependent being removed in terms of coverage while moving to a new medical aid? The main member is effectively the policyholder when it comes to medical aid and his/her dependants are beneficiaries. Unfortunately, this means the dependant has no rights once they are removed from the membership which is why it is important to obtain cover for you after a divorce with immediately effect. Does moving from one medical aid to another impact continuity of cover and/or will waiting periods apply? The usual underwriting rules apply so check with your new medical aid in terms of waiting periods and/or any exclusions. What happens if the medical aid cover was always in the ‘husbands’ name and now the ex-wife wants to apply – will she been penalised for not having a medical aid and be charged late joiner fee (if over 35)? No, however you will be required to prove that you have previously belonged to a medical aid. We advise that you request a certificate of membership showing the period that you belonged to the medical scheme as a dependant on your ex-spouse’s medical aid. What are the advantages and disadvantages of being a dependent on a partner/spouse’s medical aid? Advantages Reduced contributions, the monthly contributions for an adult dependant is cheaper than that of a main member Disadvantages The main member has to provide access and approval in order for a dependant to access online portals etc Can a divorced couple still share a medical aid scheme or does this only apply to children? Yes, if one spouse is financially dependent on the spouse. You will need to provide proof of dependency for this. If you are able to remain or your ex’s plan would this be a recommendation in terms of medical cover and continuity of healthcare? No. You will still have continuity of cover if you join a medical aid as the main member. The bottom line: Although divorce means heartbreak and emotional turmoil you do need to keep your wits about you. Seek the help of a financial adviser or broker to ensure you don’t compromise on your health or that of your children. Keep copies of your divorce papers, get any additional paperwork required, notify the existing medical aid of the changes and sign up for you own medical aid or hospital plan that kicks in immediately.
Did you know that the word appreciate has two meanings – to be grateful for, and to grow. That is exactly what gratitude does in your life – the more you appreciate the things, people, experiences in your life, the more you seem to notice things to appreciate and the more good stuff you attract. Teaching kids this basic daily practice is easy and fun – on your way to school get into a habit of taking turns to express things that you are grateful for. It is such an uplifting way to start the day and it helps kids to focus on the positive in their lives – an attitude that will serve them in everything that they do. There are so many things to be thankful for if we stop for a moment and take notice – these can be big or small and could include things like… I’m grateful for the beautiful tress on the way to school. I’m grateful for my family. I’m grateful that today is swimming day. I’m grateful for the person who let me in in the traffic. I’m grateful for the cup of tea that was made for me this morning. I’m grateful for my health. I’m grateful for the car that we’re driving in. I’m grateful for… Listing the positives is easy once you get going. I like to take this to the next level and say thank you for the negatives in my life too… I’m grateful for the headache I have right now. I’m grateful for my grumpy boss. I’m grateful for this traffic jam. The mind is a funny thing, and when we start saying thanks for things that appear to be negative, then it starts wondering, “why am I doing this” and then proceeds to come up with answers… “I’m grateful for the headache because it’s reminding me to drink more water before my kidneys pack up; I’m grateful for the grumpy boss so that I don’t get too comfortable in a job and instead keep pursuing my dreams of working for myself; I’m grateful for the traffic jam for giving me time to really reflect on what I’m grateful for!” Gratitude is like magic in the way it can transform your life – every day list, name, or express your gratitude for at least five things – try it for a month watch how the magic grows. Teach your kids to do this and see what magical lives they create for themselves!
When one considers the connotation of peer pressure, negative images are always conjured in our mind. We tend to think that as a result of peer pressure, our children can only go one way and that’s the wrong way. But is it? Indeed, peer pressure can coax our teenagers into bad behaviour. We see a lot of young people smoking or drinking simply because everyone else is doing it. Research suggests that teenagers are extremely susceptible to influence by their peers whether it be positive or negative. They are much more vulnerable to peer pressure than adults because – scientists believe – they get greater pleasure than adults from behaviours they experience as rewarding. They tend to find being liked by other people very gratifying. During puberty people experience an increase in novelty-seeking and a fascinatingly curious interest in their environment. And the need to fit in and conform is much higher at this stage than at any other stage in a person’s lifetime. Researchers have found that young people who are resilient against peer pressure or influence are those who are more popular and have families with low dysfunction and high communication skills. Although peer pressure affects all teenagers and young children, risky and socially unacceptable behaviour tends to be associated with being popular, creating huge pressure on young adolescents who are less popular or have lower self-esteem. These young ones seem to more easily fall prey to peer influence. However, some people just have a greater need to be different and crave a sense of uniqueness. This no doubt results in personal pressure to create that different person. Whilst these people can easily be seen as having a negative influence on their peers, it could be that they are doing so unwittingly. This type of influence can also have a very positive effect on others, particularly if this need to be different is being handled in a positive way with no negative behaviour involved. Warm parenting with strict boundaries has been linked to teenagers who are more independent thinkers which results in youngsters who are able to make their own decisions without feeling the pressure and being influenced from outside. Allowing your children to grow up in an environment that instils good self-image and confidence, will ensure that as they become teenagers, they will feel less like they need to conform and be less rebellious. They are the ones who will be the positive influencers and who will develop from young leaders of today to tomorrow’s much-needed well-rounded positive leaders. There are ways in which parents can assist their teenagers to get through this complex stage in their life. Talking to your teenager and explaining that they can decline alcohol at a party and going over a strategy that will help them avoid a negative activity and still save face, will give them the confidence to not have to do what their peers are doing just for the sake of it. Equipping your teenager with prepared responses to negative influences and pressure from their peers to fit in, could be the one thing that saves them from making choices that they will one day regret. Parents should thoroughly assess their children’s friends and from an early age keep open and honest communication flowing freely. You can tell your child that you do not like a particular friend without accusation or making them feel incapable of making good choices. Rather discuss the fact that it is a particular behaviour of that friend that you do not like and communicating in a way that allows your teenager to understand that you are not passing judgement on the person, will make it easier for them to see why you would prefer that they do not hang out together. Ensuring that they fully understand that society makes judgement by association should influence them to make their own decision to disassociate themselves with any negative influencers. The following are some tips to help teenagers and young children deal with peer pressure: Stay away from peers who pressure you to do things that seem wrong or dangerous. Learn how to say “no,” and practice how to avoid or get out of situations that make you feel unsafe or uncomfortable. Spend time with other children who resist peer pressure. It helps to have at least one friend who is also willing to say “no.” If you have problems with peer pressure, talk to a grown up you trust, like a parent, teacher or school counselor. The following are some tips that can help parents help teenagers and young children deal with peer pressure: Encourage open and honest communication. Let your child know they can come to you if they’re feeling pressure to do things that seem wrong or risky. Teach your child to be assertive and to resist getting involved in dangerous or inappropriate situations or activities. Get to know your child’s friends. If issues or problems arise, share your concerns with their parents. Help your child develop self-confidence. Kids who feel good about themselves are less vulnerable to peer pressure. Develop backup plans to help kids get out of uncomfortable or dangerous situations. For example, let them know you’ll always come get them, no questions asked, if they feel worried or unsafe.
Would you clean your child with a chemical that is also used to degrease car engines? Well the startling fact is that Sodium Lauryl Suphate (SLS), an ingredient still in use in many children’s body care products, is also used to clean car engines! Every day our children are potentially exposed to many chemicals — the vast majority of which have never been screened for safety. I’m not a doctor, a chemist or a scientist. I’m a Mom who believes that my child has the right to be free from exposure to harmful chemicals, artificial ingredients and nasty preservatives. When my son was born I felt it was my duty to understand those long lists of ingredients on his skin care products and that I had a responsibility as his mother to reduce his exposure to toxins. Doing my homework has at times been an enlightening journey of discovery while often a shocking eye opener. I had always thought that for these toxins to be harmful they needed to swallowed or inhaled. What I forgot is that the skin is the body’s largest organ and is absorptive. Whether a chemical is soaked in through the skin, or an aerosol spray is inhaled, or suds wash down the drain and back into the drinking water supply – they can easily end up in your child’s body. What I find most alarming is the fact that many of the children’s skin care products on the market are not only harmful to their skin but also to their long term health. Many of these ingredients are known carcinogens (cancer-causing substances) and they are used by the industry simply because they are cheap. When exposed to toxic chemicals, even small doses can affect your child’s sensitive and developing body, leaving them vulnerable to allergies and frequent bouts of infections, colds, and even behavioural challenges. What research is telling us to avoid The following are just some of the synthetic chemicals that have been identified by scientific studies to be harmful to health. Sodium Lauryl Suphate (SLS) and Ammonium Lauryl Sulfate (ALS )- SLS is a surfactant that creates lather in formulas. Often described as being “derived from coconut”, which disguises their toxic nature, these chemicals are commonly used in shampoos, toothpaste, soaps and bubble baths. SLS and ALS can cause severe skin irritation, and are easily absorbed into the body through the skin, building up in the brain, heart, lungs and liver, leading to potential long term health problems. SLS and ALS may also cause cataracts, and prevent children’s eyes from developing properly. Paraben- Parabens are preservatives widely used in skin care and baby products to prolong their shelf life. They are suspected to be carcinogenic and can cause rashes and allergic reactions. Propylene Glycol- Found in many creams and cleansers, Propylene Glycol can cause skin rashes and contact dermatitis, and has been shown to cause damage to the kidneys and liver. Isopropyl Alcohol- Alcohol is used as a solvent in many skin care products. It causes skin irritation and strips the skin of its natural acid mantle, promoting the growth of bacteria, moulds and viruses. DEA (Diethanolamine), TEA (Triethanolamine) and MEA (Monoethanolamine)- These substances are harsh solvents and detergents that are used in body creams as an emollient. They can cause allergic reactions, and long term use of DEA-based products (such as Cocamide DEA) have been linked to an increase in the incidence of liver and kidney cancer. Mineral Oil- Mineral oil is derived from petroleum (crude oil), and is commonly found as a main ingredient of face and body creams. Baby Oil is 100% mineral oil! It coats the skin like a plastic film, clogging pores and stops the skin from eliminating toxins, which can lead to acne and other skin disorders. Other petroleum based ingredients include paraffin wax, paraffin oil and petrolatum. Polyethylene Glycol (PEG)- PEG is used as a thickener in skin care products. PEGs interfere with the skin’s natural moisture balance, which accelerates ageing and leaves the skin vulnerable to bacteria. Talc- Talc is a soft mineral used in talcum powders. Inhaling powders containing talc may be harmful to long term health. Saccharin- Saccharin is an artificial sweetener added to many types of toothpaste. It’s been banned in many countries. We have become so addicted to sweets, we can’t even motivate our children to brush unless artificial sweeteners have been added to them. How to protect your child from toxins Examine the labels of your children’s skin care products carefully, and learn to recognize ingredients that are harmful to their skin and their health. Don’t be fooled by the words ‘natural’ or ‘organic’ on the label. Many products contain one or two natural or organic ingredients, but they may also contain harmful synthetic chemicals as well. Read all the ingredients and keep an eye open for the ones listed above. Whenever possible, choose products with 100% natural ingredients. Find a company you can trust that will give you simple, safe ingredients. [box type=”note” style=”rounded”]If you value the importance of natural kiddie body care then KiddieKix is offering a limited number of opportunities for Agents to help spread the goodness. Click here for more info. [/box] [hr]
Twenty first century parenting is difficult. The demands and influences are escalating and we are continuously being judged by the norms of our society. It is sometimes very difficult for parents to step out or even think out of this mould. We however need to do exactly that in order to nurture our kids optimally without reducing discipline and boundaries. I believe when we understand our children’s stressors and needs on a sensory, emotional and cognitive level, we can prepare them for the life ahead. What is Sensory Intelligence? Sensory intelligence is the insight and awareness of the primitive sensory wiring of our brains and the effect it has on everyday living. How we interpret and interact with the world is the product of sensory filtering through the senses. We see, hear, smell, taste, touch and move and respond accordingly. It is a primitive and unconscious process that occurs uniquely for all of us based on our genetic coding, and is influenced by how we were brought up. What you see, hear, smell, touch, taste and how you move is not necessarily what your child, spouse or friend will hear, smell, touch, taste or how they will move. Due to their unique genetic sensory coding they might be sensitive to a particular sound that you don’t even notice. Our sensory tolerance levels occurs across all sensory systems and will determine what we are sensitive to and thus tend to avoid versus what information we are not registering well and thus seek out. The concept of sensory intelligence is based on the sensory integration theory developed in the 1960’s which was applied to children with developmental or learning difficulties. Yet every child’s senses are a gateway through which information from the outside world is processed and relayed to the brain and this in turn triggers the child’s response to its environment. On a sensory level we as parents are responsible for the stimulation of our children for optimal growth and development. When we know our children’s sensory needs, we are better equipped to optimize their learning environment without under- or over-stimulating them – both extremes may be detrimental to their development. If we strive and work towards providing a balanced environment, we can raise children with a strong self-image and confidence – contributing to their becoming happy, positive, and successful individuals. Some children may thrive in a busy and noisy environment, while others will do better in a quiet, tranquil environment. Some may need multiple sensory stimulation, while others have a low sensory threshold and may very well feel overwhelmed and become irritable with too much going on around them. It is therefore very important for parents to be able to see and experience the world through their children’s individual eyes and unique senses. Sensory intelligence is having the ability to understand your children’s sensory needs and being able to make the necessary adjustments to their surroundings and interactions. Sensory characteristics Some of the characteristics of sensation seekers and sensation avoiders are resembled below. This is a guideline only. How children react to their sensory profiles will be dependent on their home, school, culture and physical environment. Parents should be vigilant and notice the sensory properties of activities and environment to determine for what the child is either sensitive or seeking out. Characteristics of sensation seeking children Active, fidgety, on-the-go, excitable, loud, noisy Continuously engaging, hyperactive, impulsive Take excessive risks, poor regards to safety Constantly moving, touching, biting/mouthing objects Chew on pencils, toys, clothes Bump, crash, tackle – enjoy hard physical contact Move and explore continuously Creative, energetic Need more supervision, safety awareness and strict boundaries When the above symptoms (together with other indicators) present excessively and impact on the child’s learning and development, it is described as SPD (sensory processing disorder). These children are often diagnosed as ADHD (attention deficit disorder). Research do show strong similarities between sensory processing disorder and SPD and then require specialised intervention. Characteristics of sensation avoiding children Emotionally reactive, sensitive, can be anxious Resistant to change, reliant on structure and rigid rituals Hyper vigilant: always scan environment and very intuitive and detail orientated Withdraw from stimuli and/or people Only tolerate limited clothing and/or foods Refuse messy activities Withdraw from touch/cuddles Can be aggressive and demanding When the above symptoms (together with other indicators) present excessively and impact on the child’s learning and development, it is also described as SPD (sensory processing disorder), and in this format sensory defensiveness.Defensiveness can occur in only one system (i.e. touch, auditory) but also in various other sensory systems. Sensation avoiding children have a tendency to experience stress and sensory overload regularly. However, all children, ranging between low to high thresholds, all go through stages of experiencing sensory overload. Sensory overload is often the precursor to stress, anxiety, negative behavior, poor concentration and scholastic difficulties. We tend to live in overloaded and over stimulating worlds and parents should acquire a “less is more” approach rather than “more is more”. Some sensory intelligent tips: Quiet time and spaces are crucial for our children. They need more time out to recharge their batteries. Creating a “womb” space in their bedrooms is a very good strategy. They can use these spaces independently when they are feeling overloaded. It is however very important to stress it as a time-out strategy and not a time-out discipline imposed by the parent! This prepares them for the next activity. Planning and preparation are crucial. When children are prepared in advance they can create internal dialogue for themselves to prepare and get ready. Limit spur of the moment outings and surprises as they prefer predictability and structure. They want to know what, where and how things going to happen. Tactile sensitive children are fussy when it comes to clothing textures. It really does create immense discomfort and sometimes even pain for them. It distracts them continuously and kind of “takes over” the brain so that they get irritated very quickly. Be considerate to their needs when you
Part of growing up is trying new things and at some point most teenagers experiment with alcohol. It is difficult to know at the outset which teens will only experiment versus those who will use alcohol casually and those who will develop serious alcohol abuse issues. Peer pressure becomes intense during the teenage years and is fuelled by adolescents’ strong need to belong to (or be part of) a group. Many teens also find themselves caught up in social situations where they are pressured to indulge in potentially risky behaviour which is often difficult to handle for fear of being ridiculed, isolated or mocked. This can occur in numerous environments including; school, sporting events, bars, parties and even casual get-togethers. Parents play a crucial role in mitigating some of this pressure to conform to the group and need to step up and speak to teenagers about the consequences of their actions. Alcohol abuse can negatively affect their lives if they are not equipped with the necessary information to make the right decisions. The comprehensive dangers of underage drinking are varied and can have lasting effects on both mental and physical development. Teens also tend to binge drink, which can lead to risky sexual behaviour, sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies. The rise in underage drinking in South Africa has recently come under the spotlight with many alarming statistics being reported. Government has even joined the battle to try and combat the problem by considering legislation to increase the legal drinking limit from 18 to 21 years. According to Adrian Botha, Spokesperson for the Industry Association for Responsible Alcohol Use (ARA), “added restrictive legislative measures are not going to make a difference if they are not enforced and increasing the legal drinking age will not have an impact on the 14 and 15 year old’s who are currently drinking. Education and communication starts at home with active parental involvement and this along with the enforcement of the current limit will address the problem.” The ARA distributes a Teenagers & Alcohol information booklet to schools in Johannesburg and the Western Cape, this booklet reinforces the message of the harmful consequences of underage drinking and aims to assist parents in finding a platform to communicate openly and honestly with their teens on alcohol use. “The issue of underage drinking is of great concern to us and it is for this reason that the ARA has funded the production of the “Teenagers & Alcohol” booklet as a practical guide aimed at encouraging parents to communicate with their children from an early age about the harmful effects of alcohol,” says Botha. Open dialogue with an adult role model helps teenagers to make informed decisions about alcohol and research has shown that teenagers who have regular chats with their parents about drugs and alcohol are less likely to use these substances. Talk with your teen about ways to handle pressure from friends to drink. Teach your teen how to say “no” and to suggest doing something different (safe). To feel comfortable talking openly with you, your teen needs to know that you will not punish him or her for being honest. Talk about family expectations and rules about alcohol use. Clearly state and enforce the consequences for breaking the rules. When your teen wants to talk about alcohol, listen to his or her opinions, help him or her make good decisions, and treat him or her with respect. Get to know your teen’s friends. Know where they hang out and what they are doing. Talk with the friends’ parents about alcohol. Do not serve alcohol to your teen or his or her friends. Be a role model. If you drink, do so responsibly. The ARA has also has ongoing partnerships with the organisations that educate teenagers about the dangers of underage drinking including Lifetalk, through their Speak Up initiative, now in its second year, which is run in schools in Gauteng. Speak Up equips teenagers with the tools of assertion, enabling them to ‘speak up’ against peer pressure and encourage fellow teenagers to do the same. The programme is aimed at learners, parents and teachers. “As parents it is never too late to start having conversations with your teenagers about alcohol and the harmful effect it has on young children. Don’t be afraid to consult professionals if you are faced with this situation. They can also phone the school counsellor to get the details of suitably qualified professionals who have experience working with adolescent alcohol issues,” concludes Botha. For more information contact www.ara.co.za
Over 597 000 South African children with disabilities did not attend school in 2015, almost double the 280 000 estimated in 2001. This is just one of the shocking findings in a report prepared by a range of high level advocacy groups in the South African inclusive education and disability rights arena. Known as the Right to Education for Children with Disabilities Alliance, they have provided an alternative report to the UN Committee on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities. This was done in response to South Africa’s Baseline Country Report of March 2013. Some of the key issues discussed in the December 2016 report, just released, are: Misspending of more than USD125 million allocated by the Treasury for the expansion of inclusive education; Children remaining on waiting lists for special schools for up to five years; The lack of provision for learners with disabilities before and beyond the ages of 7 and 18 years. There is particular concern about the upper age limits in primary schools, as some learners as old as 17 or 18 remain in primary schools. The state’s failure to assist learners by providing devices or additional classroom support. Most parents must carry this burden. As many cannot afford to do so, their children do not go to school; The lack of legislative protection for learners at special schools and hostels. There is a high incidence of abuse. Protective measures in the Children’s Act do not apply to special schools as they are not categorised as ‘child and youth centres’; The Curriculum Assessment Policy Statements (CAPS) curriculum. This curriculum was introduced in 2012, yet by 2015, 17 out of 22 special schools for visually-impaired learners reported not having received a single textbook, workbook or teacher’s guide for the CAPS curriculum in braille. Only 150 of the more than 600 CAPS textbooks had been adapted into braille. The lack of professional qualifications specifically for teaching children with intellectual and visual impairment, autism, or severe and complex support needs; and The poor data collection and analysis that is leading to inadequate monitoring and reporting of this sector. “We are extremely concerned by the ways in which the South African schooling system compromises the rights and dignity of children with disabilities,” said Robyn Beere, Director of Inclusive Education South Africa. “For example, private space is seldom allocated to personal care needs and buildings are inaccessible to children using wheelchairs, who then have to crawl or be carried. The discriminatory attitudes and practices that prevail in many schools ‒ if children are fortunate enough to have access in the first place ‒ have not been addressed.” The South African Constitution guarantees the right to basic education. More specifically, section 29(1) (a) states that the right to education is unqualified, not subject to the availability of resources, and therefore must be directly and immediately implemented. In its five-year strategic plan (2015/16-2019/20), the Department of Basic Education (DBE) committed to strengthen inclusive education. However, says Silomo Khumalo, Researcher at SECTION27, it has failed to translate this into meaningful action plans, targets or budgets. “Provisions related to inclusive education are scattered across a few pieces of legislation. The existing framework does not place clear obligations on the state to ensure that children with disabilities can access quality education within the general education system.” Comprehensive, transparent and equitable inclusive education budgets are obviously a necessary component of this. “Should the state defend its failure to act on the grounds of inadequate resources, South African courts require a rational explanation of why the government lacks resources, given the immediacy of the right. This was outlined in the Committee on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities’ comment on the Right to Inclusive Education in September last year.” The report makes numerous recommendations to improve conditions for children with disabilities. These span admissions policies and practices, to suitable transport for children. The report can be viewed online at www.included.org.za.
I am continually amazed at how parenting manages to derail and confuzzle us mammas. The second we think we have something aced, the next phase swoops in and sweeps us off of our feet. Just as we’ve got the sleeping down to a tee, something like Sleep Regression or Teething Trauma hits. Just as #babyjake was eating like a champion, he decided to only consume finger foods in the shape of miniature balls. And just like that, it’s back to the drawing board, and the next bout of research begins. So for all the mamma bears who’re now facing the Introduction of Proteins, here’s a quick guide to getting started. The good news is that there really isn’t much of a science to getting started on proteins. Getting Started: A month after starting solids at 5 months, I introduced #babyjake to proteins (he was now 6 months at the time). We had worked our way through most veggies and so it was time to add protein to the menu. Remember, there is no set timeline as to when you need to start solids (pick a time between 4 and 6 months based on your baby), and the same applies to proteins. Once your baby is eating well loving their mashed butternut and has gotten the hang of swallowing & digesting food, you can start introducing proteins (my guesstimate would be plus/minus a month or so after starting solids for the first time). In the beginning, just start with one protein a day, preferably at lunch time (remember you always want to introduce new foods earlier in the day rather than later, so that if your little one gets crampy, you wont be up all night). Pick one or 2 of your baby’s favourite veggies so far. If your little one is loving their butternut, then stick to that. Just make sure it’s something they already enjoy. I started off with a little bit of freshly steamed, flaked hake. That’s what my mom did with me back in the day. And for once, I didn’t turn things into a scientific research project – hake it was! It’s also incredibly easy to cook from frozen. It flakes easily (no need to puree – you can just mash it with a fork). How I prepared the hake: Buy a box of pure white, frozen hake medallions. Deboned. Deskinned. And obviously not crumbed. No need for fresh fish. Take out just one fillet (this way, if your baby doesn’t like it, you haven’t wasted anything). And steam or poach it from frozen (no need to defrost). If you don’t have a steamer, just boil the piece of fish in some water on the stove. It cooks pretty quickly. Less than 10 – 15 minutes. Ensure that its firm and white throughout. Cut the cooked fillet in half. Mash with a fork (you don’t need to puree it, it flakes beautifully). Watch out for any bones. Store the other half in the fridge, for the following day. Mix with your veggie of choice (I used butternut the first few times). Feed to baby. If no reaction, then attempt it again the following day. What next? After 2 or 3 days of successful fish feeding, you can now work your way through the following list, in no particular order, trying a new protein every couple of days. You could even try a new protein once a week. Or skip a day here of there. You really don’t need to rush things but you also don’t need to be scared to try all sorts of things. Just remember the basic common sense guidelines: Don’t try more than one new food at a time (otherwise it will be hard to pinpoint which food caused the problem) Try new foods around lunchtime, not for dinner. Otherwise you may be up with a screaming baby all night. While it isn’t necessary to wait 2/3 days before introducing new fruits and veggies to your baby, you may want to take things a bit slower when it comes to proteins. So err on the side of caution, and try one new food at a time, for 2 – 3 days at a time. Obviously if there is a family allergy to dairy, eggs or nuts – don’t try these foods on your baby without consulting your Paed. Write it all down!, so that you can keep track of how many meals per week contained red meat, fish, legumes etc. By 8 months, Jake was eating all types of protein as per the list below. So around 7 or 8 months, you can get started with all the foods on this list! Just follow the guidelines above (and consult with your Paed for further guidance). While various other proteins abound, I like to keep things simple and stick to this practical list. I have compiled this list based on foods that are baby-friendly, fuss-free and practical to cook / prepare / freeze (while still covering the full nutritional range of proteins). By 7 and a half / 8 months, #babyjake was enjoying all of these foods. Fish Hake (Frozen fillets) Salmon (Frozen fillets or tinned) Sardines or Tuna (tinned) but rather opt for sardines How to prepare: I use frozen pure hake or salmon medallions from Woolies. I cook a box at a time. Steam or boil. Then flake / mash with a fork and fill into ice cube trays. Sometimes some of the fatty fish oil rises to the top of the pot, and I scoop that back into the ice cube trays. Salmon is exorbitant though, so use sardines instead to ensure your baby gets all the Fatty Omegas needed. Meat & Poultry Lamb Beef Chicken How to prepare: Lamb is the most digestible meat for babies. It is really gentle on tiny tummies. Buy a pack of stewing lamb (any cut will do but opt for meaty pieces). In a casserole dish, throw in a collection of assorted veggies that you know your baby is safe with – carrots, butternut, sweet potato etc. Cover with
The famous human sexual response researcher, William Masters (1925 – 2001), an American gynaecologist, was known to play a game with newborn boys during delivery: ‘Can I get the cord cut before the kid has an erection?’ He often failed since most boys are born with a fully erect penis. He also observed that all baby girls lubricated vaginally in the first 4 to 6 hours of life, and that during sleep, spontaneous erections or vaginal lubrication occur every 80 to 90 minutes throughout our entire life span. Despite being born with sexuality as an inherent part of a child’s being, expressions of a sexual nature often leave parents with a feeling of discomfort and concern. ‘Sexual nature’ in this context refers to behaviour which includes touching, sexual identification, exploring one’s own body and those of others, sexual language, masturbation, and games or interaction which have sexual connotations. Although children vary in their interest in sexuality, they are all naturally curious about their own bodies and those of others. Investigative peeking games, which entail ‘you-show-me-yours-and-I’ll-show-you-mine’, are quite natural and occur in 85% of children between the ages of 3 and 7. Rest assured that these games are considered normal and are viewed as non-sexual behaviour. Apart from playing peek-a-boo with others, it is also well known that girls discover their magic buttons of pleasure. A girl may become aware of a pleasurable sensation caused by the friction of her panty, riding on her bicycle, climbing ropes or trees or gently rocking or rubbing her teddy between her legs. ‘Masturbation’ is such a weighty word to use when talking about our innocent girls, and although polite society doesn’t freely discuss matters of such delicacy, we should realise that it is quite a natural, non-sexual occurrence. Her private enjoyment of self-stimulation should be viewed in the light and innocent character of all childish diversions. You may find that she masturbates when she is tired, bored or simply relaxing. Perhaps all we need to do is explain to our little darlings that it is a private matter, and as long as she doesn’t pick the supermarket, the neighbours’ Sunday barbeque or the beachfront for private playtime, all is well. To illustrate this principle, we have a lovely account of a father reading a bedtime story to his 20-month-old little girl. Sophie would sometimes enjoy her ‘happy wiggle’ as she relaxed and listened to the calm and comforting voice of her father. In these instances, her dad would pause and say, ‘Do you want to be alone, or do you want to hear the story?’ Although worried about Sophie’s behaviour at first, her parents found that once they had discussed this openly and told her it was something she should do in private, it stopped being such a big deal. Notably, Sophie was educated in a positive way without leaving her with feelings of guilt and shame. Well worth mentioning too is certain sexual behaviour that merits some reason for concern: this includes attempting or imitating sexual intercourse with a friend, dolls or soft toys; attempts to insert objects in her or a friend’s anus or vagina; oral-genital contact; demanding that others take part in explicit sexual activities, and obsessive self-stimulation. Based on the fact that these tendencies are uncommon in emotionally healthy children but common amongst children who have been victims of abuse, these deviances do need intervention from the adult. Please listen when the little ones talk about things that seem grown-up and removed from their frame of reference. They do not have the cognitive capabilities to talk about sexual acts unless they’ve experienced it. Symptoms of possible abuse include a change in behaviour which reveals anger, hostility, aggression or withdrawal, nightmares, bed-wetting and fear of the dark, regression to babyish habits, or displaying reticence towards or fear for a person or a situation. School grades and attention span may also be affected.
In a fast paced world where people are constantly chasing time, deadlines, and are driven by the need to succeed, high levels of stress are common place. Medical research has shown time and again that chronic stress can have a negative impact on long-term health, but the implications on fertility and the ability to conceive are lesser known. However, recent literature and medical studies have shown that the reduction of stress can account for higher pregnancy rates. This is according to Mandy Rodrigues, a clinical psychologist specialising in fertility management at Medfem Clinic. Rodrigues suggests that the link between stress and fertility is multi-faceted. “Not only does stress inhibit the ability to conceive, but the constant disappointment of not being able to conceive compounds an individual or a couple’s stress levels,” says Rodrigues. “We know that stress has a direct impact on our physical health, which in turn has an impact on our fertility as well as the outcome of treatment,” adds Rodrigues. “We address a very specific type of stress called ‘Time Urgency Perfectionism Stress’. In simple terms this describes a person that is a perfectionist, is constantly chasing deadlines, and is experiencing exceptionally high levels of stress.” Dr Antonio Rodrigues, a fertility specialist at Medfem Clinic, adds that when an individual is continuously stressed, they secrete hormones that inhibit normal immune function and constrict the blood vessels, which in turn affects the body’s ability to conceive. “We recognised the link between stress and infertility about 14 years ago when we were seeing several patients that had a similar personality type,” he says. “Not only were these people extremely hard working, driven and self-confessed perfectionists, they also had other symptoms of stress including irritable bowel syndrome, spastic colon and chronic fatigue.” He explains that there is also a physiological cause, and that many of these patients tend to experience insomnia, bouts of depression, and a feeling of being out of control. Mandy Rodrigues says that there is also a difference between good stress and bad stress. “Most people are worried about normal daily challenges such as the economic situation and crime, but when it comes to the inability to conceive, we are talking specifically about people that are chronically stressed on a day-to-day basis,” she says. Studies have shown that the link between stress and infertility is quite significant with at least 30% of women being affected. Therefore, according to Mandy Rodrigues, not managing your stress might give you the same results as the next person, but managing your stress will give you a better than average chance of falling pregnant. “If we can encourage individuals to manage their stress their chances of falling pregnant are much higher.” Therefore managing stress is a definite component to treating infertility. “Changing your lifestyle is critical,” says Dr Antonio Rodrigues. “It not only increases your likelihood of falling pregnant but increases your longevity.” He explains that the same people who experience fertility problems during their 20s or 30s will have a higher risk of diabetes, conarary heart disease and cancer later on in life. “It’s all about eating properly, maintaining a moderate lifestyle, taking nutrients and managing your stress,” he adds. Another contributing factor is the stress of actually undergoing the treatment for infertility. “Recently published literature has indicated that the emotional reactions and consequences of infertility can be compared to those experienced in a post traumatic stress reaction,” says Mandy Rodrigues. “The woman or couple will experience a constant grieving cycle each month with reactions like shock, disbelief, bargaining, anger and depression. However, instead of acceptance, the couple faces a new cycle of hope again as the next cycle of treatment begins,” she says. “The causes of infertility and the processes one undergoes in diagnosing and subsequently treating infertility, have their own emotional and financial consequences for the individual and the couple. All of these have an impact on the individual and may result in depression, anxiety, helplessness and isolation.” An important suggestion for couples that are thinking of starting a family is to have a fertility plan, which maps out the stages in your treatment plan as well as possible options or reactions after each step has taken place. “This has an important psychological impact, because when people know what to expect, and they have a back-up plan, it offers them peace of mind,” says Dr Antonio Rodrigues, adding that this will also help to manage stress, and in turn promotes better results. “We conducted a study where the pregnancy rates for in vitro fertilisation in individuals that were properly managing their stress and these went up by 40%. The overall pregnancy rate in couples managing their stress was increased to 67% per cycle,” he says. Stress management really changes lives, not just in terms of treating infertility, but by actually creating long-term benefits. “We have had the opportunity to bump into some of patients whom we treated 10 years ago and it’s clear that effective stress management has actually improved their overall long-term quality of life,” concludes Mandy Rodrigues
There’s nothing quite like coming to the end of a busy day with small children, desperate for a bit of quiet adult time and seeing the flicker of light at the end of the tunnel approaching… only to have it stamped out by a child who refuses to go to sleep. It is understandable that in those moments calm and collected parenting gets stamped out right alongside. We need them to go to sleep. We need that time to ourselves to feel sane. We need a break. We need them to bloody well do as they’re told! And in that little word “need” lies the entire problem. The minute we need our children to behave in a certain way for our own wellbeing we are handing over control. Not control over them, but control over our own internal state. The truth is, nobody can make you feel anything (not even your own sometimes impossible child) without your permission. And once we need something from our kids, we’re handing over that permission slip. Our children are not out to get us, not out to disturb our peace, not planning to mess with our schedule. They just are. They’re being kids, being true to their own sense of how tired they are (or not) and what they feel like in the moment. It is us, as the adults, who are trying to impose an agenda on the moment – trying to make it bend to our will. And life always has other plans! We also teach our children in those moments to veer away from trusting their own bodies and listening to their own internal state so that they can learn to self-regulate instead of always needing us to lay down rules and guidelines. This is similar to getting them to finish their dinner when they’re not really hungry. We tell them to override their very nature. So how do we meet our own needs (because let’s be clear, we really do have a need for some quiet adult time and a break from constantly attending to little people) AND meet our children’s need to listen to their bodies and figure out their own schedules? The trick is to have freedom within boundaries. You can, for example, allow the kids to stay up doing something quietly in their room until they feel tired, provided they do not interrupt the adults. The French have been doing this for centuries. They simply state that from 8pm it is adult time and children need to occupy themselves. Most parents I know panic about this idea as they’re worried the kids will then be too tired for school the next day. Will they? Yes, there probably will be a day here and there where they overdo it and don’t get enough sleep. This is called experiencing the consequences of your actions. And it is exactly how children learn to self-regulate. You will also find that when you remove your need and desperation for them to sleep that that anxious energy is no longer a factor at bedtime and everyone is feeling more relaxed and peaceful, and this naturally sets the stage for a trip into slumberland! In short, stay calm, make sure you are meeting your own needs (and not relying on your kids to meet them for you) and let your children naturally fall asleep when their bodies are ready.
Ever wondered why some people lose weight on one type of diet and others don’t and why is there is so many conflicting results? It might be because of us. Well, because of our different genes. This specific question led to the emerging science of genetic testing, called nutritional genomics (a.k.a. nutrigenomics) – the study of interactions between genes and diet. Keep reading if you want to know more. GENES, DIET AND WEIGHT LOSS Dieting is often an endless cycle of losing weight and gaining it all back. Thousands of diets exist, but how do you know which one is best for you? The answer may lie in your DNA. The idea of the DNA DIET is rooted in the scientifically proven reality that dieting simply doesn’t work for many people. Popular diets are based on a presumption that ONE-SIZE-FITS-ALL. That is NOT true. For some people it is harder to lose weight than for others because of their genes. A now famous study conducted at Stanford University looked at the long-term effects of weight loss using a few different diets assigned at random. Results showed that some participants lost weight on one type of diet, such as low-fat, while others did not. The study then tested participants’ DNA for 3 specific gene variations and found that those using the best diet for their DNA lost 2-3 times more weight than those on the ‘wrong’ diet, not using their best DNA diet. DNA testing and following a weight loss diet based on your genetic make-up makes sense because our genes control hormone levels, enzyme levels – all the basic levels of metabolism. And how we metabolize food determines what happens to the nutrients and calories we take in. ONE SIZE DOESN’T FIT ALL Nutritional guidelines are for ALL individuals, but just like clothes, a “one-size-fits-all” approach is not applicable. These dietary recommendations are based on averages across large populations or responses of people, which could be irrelevant to others. For many years, doctors and dieticians have viewed diet the same way, assuming there is only one optimal diet for all. Research has shown otherwise and that this is likely not the case. Humans are 99.5% the same. Yet that 0.5% difference matters. Why is DNA testing so successful for weight loss? Research has shown that it is extremely important for successful weight loss to know the right amounts and ratios of macronutrients in your daily nutritional intake. Therefore knowing how many carbohydrates, proteins, saturated fats and unsaturated fats you should eat daily plays the most important role in your weight loss management plan. Research found that individuals who dieted using recommendations based on their actual genetic makeup lost 33% more weight than those who didn’t. HOW GENETIC TESTING WORKS It is as simple as 1-2-3! Do a cheek swap DNA testing is easy and painless, by taking a cheek swap sample (like they do in Crime Scene Investigations on TV) and then sending the sample back to the DNAlysis laboratory for analysis. Here they use modern technology to analyse a person’s sample in order to identify genetic variants and study the relationship between individual genes and diet – thereby gaining intimate knowledge about physiological processes that may not function optimally. Unlock your results The DNA DIET report is generated that allows an individual to understand how their genes affect the way he or she respond to foods they consume e.g. carbohydrates or saturated fat. The DNA DIET further determines the right amounts and ratios of macronutrients required on a daily basis by defining your weight loss nutritional type (e.g. Mediterranean, Low-Fat or Low-Carb). By knowing that, you can give your body exactly what it needs! No more cravings and constant hunger you have experienced with previous diets that resulted in unsuccessful weight loss. Optimise your diet and training plan The DNA DIET report is used to refine your nutrition and exercise plan to manage your weight. Providing you with a diet plan tailored to your genes (be it low carb or low fat) and insight into optimal exercise intensity for weight loss. However, some people have the gene where physical activity does not help them lose weight! INSIGHT INTO DNA DIET RESULTS Genetic variations make each of us unique in all sorts of ways, including how our bodies respond to different types of foods, it may also have a powerful influence on what we like to eat (bitter vegetables or sweets) as well as why some people get fat and others stay thin. Some gene variants affect appetite and satiety. Others appear to influence how efficiently people burn fat for energy. Obesity Risk The DNA DIET test will reveal if you have what is called the “increased obesity risk” gene called FTO. This gene plays a role in appetite control, meaning a person with this gene are likely to eat more, feel hungry soon after a meal and crave fattier foods more than someone without this gene. Then there is the gene that tells a person whether they are more likely to gain and regain weight as well as their ability to lose weight more slowly or faster than others. The DNA DIET will also indicate if you are genetically inclined to have a higher body fat percentage and higher waist circumference. Carbohydrate responsiveness Certain gene variants impact your ability to lose weight when carbohydrates are eaten. If a person’s carbohydrate sensitivity is very high, they are more likely to put on weight if they eat lots of carbs. This means to lose weight they’ll be better suited to a low carb diet and would need to restrict refined carbs significantly. If someone falls in the low risk category, they can eat carbohydrates and still lose weight. Eating behaviour Certain people are genetically more prone to forms of food and sugar addiction than others. Part of the reason for this is that some people are more predisposed to seek out pleasure than others. For instance, in our brain, there is a
No parent wants to see their child suffer at the hands of a bully. As much as we would like to shield them from horrible people, as parents, we have to be realistic. Our job is to prepare our kids for life in the real world and that means helping them learn how to cope with mean people. The problem is that most parents don’t know how to actually help their kids aside from general platitudes like – stand up for yourself or ignore them. The question is, how does a modern educated parent approach the subject of bullying? We want more than theories and platitudes. We want a pragmatic approach that will actually work for our children. It turns out that there is a very pragmatic approach that really does work. It is a compassionate approach based on the science of behavioral management. I studied cognitive psychology in college and spent time in a dolphin cognition research lab. While there I learned about operant and classical conditioning. The way you extinguish a behavior in an animal using operant conditioning is the same way you get a bully to stop. Not by punishing bad behavior, but by not rewarding it. It turns out that animals and bullies treat negative reinforcement as reinforcement. In order to get bullying to stop, you need to not reinforce the bully at all. This is hard to do because, bullies are really good at getting you to respond, that’s why they do what they do. What we need to teach our children is practical things they can do and say that will help them respond without rewarding the bully. It isn’t enough to say – stand up for yourself or ignore them. Kids need to be told specifically, here is what you need to say, and here is how you say it, now let’s practice it so you can say it under the pressure of active bullying. Most kids can pick up these skills pretty quickly when presented in such a pragmatic way. The key to this approach is to help your child develop a neutral emotional response to the actions of a bully. The best way to do that is to practice and cultivate compassion. It’s hard to do because we are often so involved in our own hurt that we don’t want to let go enough to think compassionately about others. But it is precisely when we let go of our hurt that we are able to respond in a more neutral way because, we are no longer thinking about our pain, we are now thinking about the pain of another. Compassion really is a powerful emotion. Finally, what we know from behavior research is that it isn’t enough to not reward a bully; you have to actually be prepared for what is known as an extinction burst or a blowout. Basically, when you take away an animal’s reward, they don’t give it up without a fight. They work harder and become more aggressive to get their reward. In other words, when you stop reinforcing a bully, they get more aggressive for a period of time before they give up their bad behavior. This well-known extinction dynamic is the main reason why most kids give up trying to get bullying to stop. They make a good faith effort to do what the adults counsel them to do, it makes their problem worse, not better, so they give up. However, when a child is told to expect this escalation as natural part of the process of eliminating the behavior, they are better equipped to handle the escalation and ride it out until it goes away. Again, they key to doing this successfully is having the right frame of mind and that requires compassion.
This is partly an excerpt from the “Unlearn” chapter in my book Mila’s Meals: The Beginning & The Basics. Disclaimer: As with everything concerning food there are two sides to any debate raging around every one of the topics in this chapter – both sides will be defended with scientific proof, and ‘absolute’ recommendations. I am merely presenting my beliefs formed by my research and first hand experience of both Mila’s, and my own digestive issues. I encourage you to do your own research should anything mentioned here not ‘sit well’ with you. I am not trying to convince you of anything – I simply hope to provide information, and at the very least prompt you to question what has previously or otherwise been presented as absolute fact and truth. Whole grains ARE good for you and your little one, very good in fact – but here’s the catch – it depends on: When you introduce them, Which grains you eat, and How you prepare them, Eating unprepared grains, introducing them too soon, or eating gluten-containing grains can have negative health effects. When to introduce grains. Many traditional cultures have fed their babies grains before their first birthday – as their first food even – but they were all fermented first. For the reasons mentioned in my “Rice cereal is (not) the best first food for baby” blog post, it is best to wait until your little one is a year old before introducing grains. At this age, he/she will have more of the amalyse digestive enzyme that is needed to digest grains. According to The Nourishing Traditions Book of Baby & Childcare by Sally Fallon Morell and Thomas S. Cowan, if there is a history of celiac disease or gluten intolerance in the family, it is best to wait until your little one’s third year before introducing grains. Which grains to choose Properly prepared grains are nutritious – they are important sources of many nutrients, including protein, fibre, B vitamins and minerals (iron, magnesium and selenium). In order to avoid gluten, you need to avoid: Wheat Barley Rye Spelt Oats (unless the oats are certified gluten-free). See the chapter “Why Not Gluten, Dairy and Sugar?” in my book Mila’s Meals: The Beginning & The Basics for more on why avoiding gluten may be a great decision for you and your little ones. There are many naturally gluten-free grains to choose from including: Rice Quinoa Millet Buckwheat Sorghum Amaranth These grains are nutrient-dense, act as antioxidants and, help the body make serotonin, which improves mood while providing a calming, soothing effect on the nervous system. Preparation Whole grains are the hardest food for the human body to digest, and all grains contain anti-nutrients that must be neutralized before cooking. They all have phytic acid that can block the absorption of calcium, magnesium, copper and zinc as well as enzyme inhibitors that block the digestive enzymes needed to digest it. In order to unlock a grain’s nutritional potential, it is necessary to prepare them in a way that makes them more digestible – such as soaking them for 24 hours, fermenting or sprouting them before cooking. Preparing grains with a dollop of healthy fat (such as ghee or coconut oil) will help the absorption of calcium, phosphorus, iron, B vitamins and the many other vitamins that whole grains provide. I go into this in more detail in the “Feeding with Awareness” chapter of Mila’s Meals: The Beginning & The Basics… Enzymes, Nutrients and Anti-nutrients Digestive enzymes are primarily produced in the pancreas and small intestine. They break down our food into nutrients so that our bodies can absorb them. A nutrient is a substance that provides nourishment essential for growth and the maintenance of life. So what then are anti-nutrients? Anti-Nutrients As scientific research methods develop, new information on nutrition comes to light that challenges what we have previously held to be true about our food. One of these new pieces of information is that of ‘anti-nutrients’. Anti-nutrients interfere with the absorption of nutrients and digestion and, irritate the intestinal tract. Whole grains, nuts, seeds and legumes are all high in anti-nutrients. But these foods are meant to be good for you – right? Well yes – if they are correctly prepared, in a way that reduces the anti-nutrients. Anti-nutrients are part of a seed’s natural system of preservation. Nature has ensured that seeds won’t sprout until the perfect growing conditions exist. Two of these anti-nutrients worth mentioning are Phytic Acid and Enzyme Inhibitors. Phytic Acid Phytic Acid is the storage form of phosphorous – that is, seeds store phosphorus as phytic acid. Grains, nuts and legumes are all seeds and have high levels of phytic acid. So do other edible seeds such as pumpkin and sunflower seeds. When phytic acid is bound to a mineral in the seed, it’s known as phytate. Phytic acid is an anti-nutrient because it binds to essential minerals (such as calcium, copper, iron, zinc, and magnesium) in the digestive tract, making them less available to our bodies. Phytates also reduce the digestibility of starches, proteins, and fats. Enzyme Inhibitors Enzyme inhibitors are present in seeds to prevent them from developing (sprouting) until there are suitable growing conditions. Unfortunately eating seeds with enzyme inhibitors negatively affects our digestive and metabolic enzymes. It is not necessary to avoid foods containing phytic acid or enzyme inhibitors, but it is important to prepare them correctly – as our ancestors did. Correct preparation reduces the phytic acid, neutralises the enzyme inhibitors and increases the bio-availability of the nutrients. Grain preparation Soaking nuts, grains, seeds and legumes Soaking and fermenting nuts, grains, seeds and legumes is something our grannies (or granny’s granny) did and for good reason. It mimics nature’s ‘perfect sprouting’ conditions by providing moisture, warmth, time and slight acidity. As the seed begins to germinate while soaking, phytic acid is reduced, enzyme inhibitors are neutralised and the production of numerous beneficial enzymes begins. The action of these enzymes
Do you ask yourself, “Why am I so tired?” Do you feel like no matter how much sleep you get, you’re still tired all the time? Feeling exhausted is so common these days that it has its own acronym, TATT, which stands for “tired all the time”. Tiredness is one of the most common complaints at any given time, one in five people feels unusually tired, and one in 10 have prolonged fatigue, according to experts. Tiredness can often be attributed to sleeping too little, but if you are reaching that eight hour threshold and still feeling exhausted, your low energy level may be an indicator of an underlying problem. Let’s find out why you’re always tired. BLOOD SUGAR IMBALANCE Chances are if you’re always tired, your blood sugar has something to do with it. One of the biggest risk factors for feeling tired all the time is being a “carboholic,” meaning someone who overeats refined carbs and sugary foods. This same person also doesn’t acquire enough healthy fats, proteins, vegetables and essential nutrients that support ongoing energy. Blood sugar levels become unbalanced when your diet is too high in various forms of sugar, which enters the bloodstream rapidly and can cause extreme elevations in blood glucose as well as insulin levels. This puts you on a “sugar high” followed by a “sugar crash”…..which lead to fluctuations in blood sugar and feelings of fatigue, headaches, moodiness, hormonal changes and food cravings. Over time, imbalances in blood sugar can cause serious diseases like insulin resistance and type 2 diabetes. In the case of insulin resistance, the hormone insulin isn’t able to get nutrients, particularly glucose, into the body’s cells. Since your cells aren’t properly absorbing blood sugar, they can’t transfer energy throughout the body sufficiently. High insulin also creates inflammation which can prevent healing, confuse your body, and affect energy levels. The Fix: To get blood sugar levels back under control, you’ll need to really reduce, or even to completely eliminate, all sources of refined sugar from your diet. These include fizzy cool drinks, energy drinks, sweetened coffee or tea, fruit juice, packaged snacks like all cookies, cakes, some cereals and jelly sweets. Even natural sweeteners like raw honey, can still affect blood sugar levels. Also consider reducing your total carbohydrate intake – choose low glycaemic index carbohydrates and combine where possible with protein to ensure stable blood glucose levels. If you are concerned about your blood sugar levels and the possibility of being insulin resistant or even perhaps being diabetic then there are blood tests that can be done to confirm a diagnosis. ANEMIA One of the most common medical reasons for feeling constantly run down is iron deficiency anemia. Anemia occurs when there’s a problem with red blood cells making hemoglobin, a protein that carries oxygen throughout the body, especially to the brain where it is much needed. Anemia is connected to insufficient iron levels within the blood, in addition to low vitamin B12 and folate levels. Anemia can also be caused by a loss of blood or a diet that’s too low in those essential nutrients and, thus, hinder the body’s ability to make enough hemoglobin. Women with heavy periods and pregnant women as well as vegetarians are especially prone to anemia. To diagnose anemia, blood tests would be required. Do check iron stores as well as folate and vitamin B12 – not just hemoglobin! This is very important before taking an iron supplement since unnecessarily high levels of iron could interfere with the body’s ability to absorption other important nutrients such as zinc and calcium. The Fix Eat a vitamin-rich diet! Anemia symptoms can be greatly reduced by improving your diet and including plenty of foods that are rich in iron, vitamin B12 and folate. Iron sources include beef and other meats, beans, lentils and fortified breakfast cereals. Eat iron rich foods together with foods high in vitamin C that helps with iron absorption, such as citrus fruits, berries and cruciferous vegetables like broccoli or cauliflower. Also choose green leafy vegetables that contain a significant amount of iron and folate. Foods rich in vitamin B-12 include meat, dairy products, and fortified cereal. DEHYDRATION The most common cause of dehydration is excessive loss of body fluids, especially of water and electrolytes, simply not drinking enough water, or substituting water intake with only soda or juice. This is a critical mistake as not only does that spike your blood sugar, but also your cells cannot get enough water to function properly! Fact is, when you start to feel thirsty, your body is already dehydrated. The major electrolytes in the body — sodium, potassium, chloride and bicarbonate — are ion compounds that literally help your body to have energy via the force of electricity that keeps your organs (the brain, heart, nervous system , muscles) and cells functioning. Dehydration affects the actual viscosity (thickness) of your blood and the amount that your heart must beat every minute, as it tries to get oxygen to all your cells. When you’re dehydrated, your heart sends oxygen and nutrients to your brain, muscles and organs at a slower pace; as a consequence, you begin to feel fatigued, lethargic, moody, like you have “brain fog”, weakness in muscles, unable to concentrate and perform tasks. The Fix Drink more water throughout the day, increase your intake of vegetables and fruits, and make sure you’re getting plenty of electrolytes in the form of whole foods. To calculate the amount of water you need to drink daily to avoid dehydration, take your weight in kilograms, and multiply with 20ml. In other words, if you’re a woman who weighs 60kg, you need to drink 1200ml water per day, or roughly five 250ml glasses of water to stay fully hydrated. But this is only the amount of water if you do not exercise or do anything strenuous! If you work out or if you are active, then you ideally need to drink at least an extra 250ml for every
A hungry child is a less fussy child. After School is a great window of opportunity to get your child to eat something healthy as they generally come home starving having rushed lunch to spend time with their friends in the playground. A few simple ideas and a few minutes spent in preparation can make a big difference to your child’s diet. Instead of whole fruit in a fruit bowl cut up a selection of colourful fruits and arrange them on a plate. Have healthy snacks like mini cheeses, dried fruit, a bowl of salad with a tasty dressing on the table so that your child eats these rather than crisps or chocolate biscuits. Ways to include anti oxidants in your child’s diet? Use a wide variety of vegetables and prepare them in diverse ways. Aim daily to include 3 different colour fruits and/or vegetables. Crudites and dips are fun for children and make for easy and nutritious snacks. Vegetable versus fruit eaters. Some kids love their cooked veggies, but struggle with salads and fruit. Others will eat salads and fruit but turn their noses up at cooked veggies. Aim not to make an issue of their respective dislikes, rather applaud them for the foods they do eat and do a food challenge with the ones they find more difficult to consume. For example if you have a child that struggles with vegetables, you could make Monday green vegetable day where you and your child choose one green vegetable he is prepared to try. Then come up with a fun way to eat and prepare the veggie/ fruit of choice. Herbs are a great way to get anti-oxidants in the cooking. Hide and mix them in stews and gravies. Peeled baby carrots, cherry tomatoes, cucumber slices SAD sugar free bars Pure woolies fruit rolls Fruit salad Raisins Dried fruit men Fruit juices Smoothies Plain yogurt with fruit pulp “Don’t eat between meals.” “Don’t touch that cookie — you’ll spoil your dinner!” “Snacking will make you gain weight.” Chances are, you’ve said something similar to your children – or maybe heard it from your own mom. But snacking on the right foods is not harmful. In fact, it can have health benefits for kids of all ages. Snacking is not a bad thing – in fact, it’s a good thing – and it can actually help keep kids from overeating at mealtime. Studies show that snacking during the school day improves both mood and motivation, and may impact concentration. Snacks may help children maintain performance during times of high mental demand, like when taking an exam or making a class presentation. But even while we’re bombarded with choices by the snack food industry, it’s not always easy to find healthy snacks – much less get your kids to eat them. Here are six simple guidelines. 1. Relax the Food Ties That Bind While you may have strict nutritional guidelines for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, snacks are the place to give children some wiggle room. Give them a little of what they like (be it potato chips or a small chocolate) a couple of days a week, and you’ll have better luck getting them to eat healthy snacks the rest of the time. 2. Choose the Lesser of the Evils When it comes to ingredients like sugar and saturated fat, you might think most commercial snack foods are pretty similar, give or take a gram. But look a little harder at the label and you may find important differences. If, for example, you have two items that are equal in sugar, fat, and calories, sometimes you’ll find that one contains vitamins, minerals, and fiber while the other doesn’t.Opting for the more nutrient-dense snack will help ensure it has some redeeming value, even if some of the other ingredients are not top nutritional choices. In addition, keep an eye on the sugar content. Some snacks, even seemingly healthy ones like flavoured yogurt, are way over the top when it comes to added sweeteners. The American Medical Association says that when our sugar intake exceeds 25% of our total caloric intake, it impacts us nutritionally. But the World Health Organization sets the threshold at 10% – so sugar is an issue to consider. A quick way to tell if a snack has gone over the line: It’s over 250 calories a serving, it’s probably got too many empty calories. 3. Portion, Portion, Portion While it’s OK to give kids some leeway on choosing what snacks to have, it’s still vital to pay attention to portion size. It’s also important to look for snacks with low levels of fat, saturated fat, and trans fat. Even if the package says a snack has no trans fats, read the ingredient list to be sure. If you see the word ‘hydrogenated,’ it means it has some trans fat, so avoid that snack. If your child is battling a weight problem, paying attention to portion size and total calories is vital, but don’t deny the child the opportunity to snack. 4. Make It Easy to Eat Well Having trouble getting your kids to eat healthy snacks like fruits, vegetables, and whole-grain items? Make these foods easy to munch, and they will eat more of them. No matter what food it is you’re trying to get your child to eat, if you make it accessible, if it’s easy to eat, if it’s there waiting for them in the fridge or on the counter, you will increase the likelihood that they will eat it. But cutting up fruits and veggies into bite-sized pieces isn’t quite enough. Snacks should also be packaged in a way that makes it easy for kids to ‘grab and go’. The key is not only making snacks easy to eat, but also easy to share. Kids love to share their snacks at school and if you help them do that, they are more likely to eat what you prepare, rather then trade up for something from
All children are born with sexuality as an inherent part of their being. The famous human sexual response researcher William Masters (1925–2001), an American gynecologist, was known to play a game with newborn boys during delivery, saying “Can I get the cord cut before the kid has an erection?” But he often failed since most boys are born with a fully erect penis. He also observed that all baby girls lubricated vaginally in the first four to six hours of life, and that during sleep, spontaneous erections or vaginal lubrication occur every eighty to ninety minutes throughout our entire life span. As our babies grow up, they start forming their sexual identity. We find that much of boys’ sexual identification is linked to the fact that they have a penis. Parents often express appreciation and praise when their two-year-old son flaunts his penis, which gives the proud boy the notion that he is the owner of a priceless body-part. The penis is truly a wonderful object: a natural little plaything, it is able to launch an entertaining stream of urine that can be proudly sprayed and splashed around whilst standing. This tool can also be used as a weapon and a little boy might provoke siblings by literally ‘pissing them off’. For little girls, however, a vagina is her secret organ, not only invisible to her, but also often viewed in a negative light if touched by her: ‘whatchamacallit’ code words and euphemisms further aid in neatly concealing this hidden treasure. When nature calls for desperate measures, she has to hide and crouch to urinate – an inconvenient, and often, embarrassing affair. Boys understand from an early stage that privacy and shame are two separate concepts: they learn to be both proud and private with regard to their genitalia. For young girls the mysteriousness and privacy of their genitalia are often veiled in secrecy and shame. This disparity in underlying values is carried with us well into adulthood and can have a significant influence on our sexual health. From this point of view, it appears that women start off with a disadvantage, which gives us reason to invite some change. Firstly, when little ones ask a question, they are ready for an answer. Listen carefully to the question and try to respond by offering nothing more, nothing less. Furthermore, and most importantly, we need to teach our children the correct vocabulary. According to Steven Pinker, a psychology professor at Harvard and the author of The Stuff of Thought: Language as a Window into Human Nature, at least 1,200 terms are used for the vagina, and approximately 1,000 terms for the penis in the English language alone. We tend to continue to create new pet names for our intimate parts to use in a familiar and playful manner among friends and family, which is not bad per se, but Eve Ensler, a prominent anti-violence activist, playwright and creator of The Vagina Monologues, warns ‘what we don’t say becomes a secret, and secrets often create shame and fear and myths.’ If this is the case, it is perhaps time for us to get off the euphemism treadmill …
If you read between the lines on a study done in 2007(1), it seems that babies born by caesarean section are a lot more likely to suffer from allergy-related diseases if you don’t supplement probiotic bacteria. Caesar babies are born with sterile digestive tracts. If you don’t correct this, your baby may not be equipped to: Digest lactose, Manufacture Biotin (a B vitamin) or vitamin K2, Properly absorb their minerals, and Keep harmful bacteria in check. As a result, their immune systems may also be weaker. Babies in the womb have sterile intestines. When born naturally through the birth canal, they swallow vast amounts of bacteria and start the process of developing a healthy bacteria-filled intestine & mouth (and in girls, the vagina). Every person has a large number of bacteria in their bodies. If you are healthy, you will have a balanced mix of friendly, good bacteria and bacteria that would harm you if allowed to. Adults have around 2.5kg of bacteria spread between their small and large intestines. Kids have a proportionately smaller amount depending mostly on their body size. Every time you touch things around you, you pick up good and bad bacteria. When you avoid it, you do your immune system a disservice because your body is built to handle this contact. In fact, it thrives on it, and without it, your immune system can become weak and ineffectual (this is known as the Hygiene theory (opens new window))… Good bacteria do many things for us, including manufacture some B and K vitamins, improve digestion & absorption (especially of milk and minerals), and keep harmful bacteria under control so they can’t multiply beyond safe levels and make us sick. The study in question focused on 1223 mothers whose infants were thought to be at higher risk of developing allergies because at least one parent had been physician-diagnosed with an allergic disease. Each mother received a mix of 4 strains of probiotic bacteria or a placebo during the last month of their pregnancy. Once born, their babies were given the same mixture plus a prebiotic galacto-oligosaccharide from birth until six months of age. At five years old, the children were examined for symptoms of eczema, food allergy, allergic rhinitis (hay fever), and asthma. The study concluded that the probiotics did not significantly protect children from allergies – except those who had been born by Caesarean section. This group had a 53 percent lower chance of developing an allergic disease. Let’s unpack that If your baby is born by caesarean section, it’s a good idea to give them a probiotic supplement to start the colonization of their intestinal bacteria. If either parent has allergies, it becomes much more than a good idea. Just by supplementing with a probiotic, you can cut their risk of developing your allergies in half. Of course, there are other things you can do that will add to that figure, but this on its own is a fantastic start… Healthy-kids.co.za recommends… When your baby is born by caesarean section, make it a point to supplement with a probiotic that contains at least 1 Billion bacteria, including at least these strains of bacteria: – Lactobacillus Acidophilus – Bifidobacterium Bifidus Choose your supplement carefully to ensure that the bacteria are live and effective – and you may like the trustworthiness of the GNLD Acidophilus Plus supplement. To give it to a baby, simply ease open the capsule and pour a little of the powder directly onto your baby’s tongue once a day. Divide each capsule over 5 days. Continue for 8 weeks. If either parent has allergies, then mom should supplement 1 capsule of GNLD Acidophilus plus each day for the last month of her pregnancy, give this same supplement to your baby for their first 6 months. About the writer: Tracy Hesslewood owns www.healthy-kids.co.za
Puberty follows a reasonably consistent sequence in girls. At a quick glance, this is what you can expect: first the development of the breast buds, which occur any time between the ages of 7 and 13, followed by the appearance of coarse, dark woollies under the arms and around the genitalia. About 15% of girls develop the other way around: first the pubic hair and then the bee-stings. The first menstrual cycle can be expected, on average, around 2 to 2½ years after the onset of breast development. Although 12.6 years is the average for a first menstrual period to commence, anything from age 9 to 15 is considered standard. Generally, women get their period every 28 days, but an interval of 21 days up to 40 days is also viewed as normal. One telltale sign that your girl is about to have her first period is a whitish, odourless vaginal discharge. This secretion is called leucorrhea and is a normal indicator that hormonal taking place. Leucorrhea is part of the vagina’s natural defense mechanism to maintain a healthy chemical balance, and it also preserves vaginal tissue flexibility. The first day of red or brownish spotting is to be remembered for a very long time. This is an exciting time, but sadly it is often clouded by fear, secrecy and embarrassment. Open and positive communication between mothers and daughters is of paramount importance during this time as the messages received from Mom will play the biggest role in our daughters’ first-time experience and overall view of becoming a woman. Expressions such as ‘the curse’, ‘on the rag’, or ‘the red plague’ are bound to instil fear, disgust and negativity. In too many cases mothers fail to talk to their daughters and neglect to offer the emotional support with regard to changing relationships with parents, siblings and friends. Secrecy around carrying, storing, using and discarding menstrual products is also often implied. Only 15% of young ladies report a positive first-time experience; 68% have no awareness of their mother’s experience with menstruation, and 64% receive negative messages from their mothers. As our girls move toward this rite of passage, it provides us with an ideal platform to strengthen the special mother-daughter bond. Menarche (first menstrual period) celebrations around the world confirm the importance of this huge step into womanhood. In Australia, an Aborigine girl is instructed in ‘love magic’, and taught the female powers of being a woman. In Japan the entire family celebrates a girl’s first period by eating red-coloured rice and beans. In rural India the girl is given a ceremonial bath, adorned with ornate jewels and garments, and the girl’s kith and kin are invited for a ceremony during which it is announced that the girl has come of age. In Kumari, Nepal, the young girls are worshipped as goddesses, and Nootka Indians believe menarche to be a time to test a girl’s physical strength and endurance: she is taken out to sea and left alone in the water. The girl has to swim back and is cheered upon returning to the shore of the village. Don’t you think that it is a brilliant idea to do something really special too for our girls as they join us and share the solidarity amongst women? Be it a private diary to record her experiences as a woman; a special calendar to mark the frequency of her menstrual cycle; pierced ears or a first leg-shave; a new nightie, or a shared outing – let the prospect of her first period be something wondrous and exciting for her to anticipate. Talk to her and explain what is about to happen, and let her be equipped by preparing a special toiletry bag for school: pack an extra panty, a pad or two, and surprise her with a small ’welcome-to-womanhood’ gift. Good luck!
Slip, slide, bump, bash, climb, wibble and wobble! Who knew so much fun could be so valuable?! Having access to a safe, clean and developmentally appropriate playground can have far reaching benefits for the leaders of tomorrow! In an age where there is a tendency for little ones to be involved in more sedentary play, it is becoming increasingly important for caregivers to make opportunities available for climbing, swinging, sliding and balancing. This kind of invaluable play can help to strengthen your child’s core muscles needed for sitting endurance and task completion. Our children are becoming accustomed to getting what they want easily and quickly, and thus “practice makes perfect” is not always inherently part of growing up. In the past, when children spent many hours entertaining themselves, often outdoors, skills such as endurance, frustration tolerance, creative problem solving, perseverance and the ability to apply initiative were part of growing up. While our faster-paced world has provided amazing new opportunities to connect our children and expand their life space globally, technology has led to more time spent indoors, often sitting or lying down in front of a screen! Playgrounds provide opportunities to move in many different planes and ways. Our movement sense sends information to our brain which provides our muscles with the information needed to stretch and contract appropriately in order to negotiate obstacles and balance on unstable surfaces. The way in which this movement is completed (successfully or unsuccessfully), in turn, feeds back into our brain to help plan and refine our next set of movements. The brain tells the muscles what to do, but the senses enable the brain to do the telling. The ability to come up with an idea for movement, plan and then execute that movement smoothly and efficiently is called motor planning. Motor planning is essential for a child to learn any new tasks. It affects how efficiently a child tackles this new task, and thus will impact how quickly he can master and complete it. A child who struggles with motor planning may often stand on the side lines and watch other children play before feeling confident enough to join in. He may also be hesitant to try new movements and prefer to stick to what he knows. This is why it is important for children to have the opportunity to play at different play grounds, or be encouraged to use one piece of playground equipment in different ways. Climbing, pulling, pushing, and carrying weight over, under and through obstacles all provide the body with vital feedback about its position in space and how it is moving. This feeds into the child’s internal map of what his body looks and feels like. Your child needs a good body map when learning about depth perception and spatial concepts. Without this foundational skill, he may struggle later on to position his letters on a line, size his letters in relation to one another and grasp mathematical concepts. When a child is offered the opportunity to challenge his body and test the limits of what he can and cannot do, he will develop the ability to use the two sides of his body in a smooth and coordinated way. Many everyday tasks rely heavily on the ability to use both sides of our brain to effectively complete complex movements, from brushing our hair, buttering our bread and tying our shoelaces to cutting, ruling a line with a ruler and riding a bicycle. Clambering over carefully thought-out playground equipment can challenge and develop these skills. Initially children may find playgrounds daunting and need some help to explore the adventures that lie inherently therein. Do not be too tempted to pick your child up and simply place him where he wants to be! Try offering him a foothold, and simply give him some verbal cues or allow him some time to watch you or other children climb and play. There is so much learning potential in moving from one spot on a playground to another, e.g. getting from the ground up the ladder to the fireman’s pole! Often in our bid to help our children, we sometimes rob them of that opportunity to figure it out for themselves. Rather help him just as much as he needs and remember to praise his effort and not simply his success! Often younger children will need a few trips to the same playground before they are confident to attempt some of the climbing by themselves. Sometimes just having you close by is enough motivation. If he is hesitant about a particular part of the playground, check that it is not too hot, rough or unstable for him! Some newer playgrounds offer interesting and varied textures and surfaces for little hands and feet! Where possible, encourage him to take his shoes and socks off to allow for easier climbing and a fuller sensory experience.
Parenting is a joy but it can also be overwhelming and just a little daunting. There is no degree or diploma, you are simply launched into it and there’s a steep learning curve. You instantly have a new life depending on you and, combined with sleep deprivation, the challenges of adjusting to being a parent and wanting to do the best for your child, you need all the help you can get. Bonitas Medical Fund is doing just that with the launch of the first dedicated toddler’s health advice line, called Babyline, to its members. Here help is at hand, from professionals, as you take the necessary baby steps along the path of looking after the health of your toddler, up to the age of three. Essentially Babyline is a 24-hour children’s health advice line manned by paediatric trained registered nurses. They are on the other side of the phone to assist with any parental concerns, or health related issues, 24/7, 365 days of the year. ‘Parents are often confronted with a host of children’s health issues, particularly in the first three years. In an effort to help educate and support Bonitas moms and dads and to ensure their medical aid benefits last longer, we have partnered with Paed IQ’s babyline service,’ explains Bonitas Medical Fund. ‘The service was developed in conjunction with the Department of Paediatrics at the University of Pretoria and is based on a concept used by the top providers of child health advice in the USA.’ ‘The system of telephone advice, guarantees members instant and real time access to pre-eminent, professional advice and standardised paediatric protocols,’ explains Dr Iqbal Karbanee of Babyline. ‘Our aim is to give parents the best possible resources to help them maintain and improve the health of their child. It’s about giving anxious parents peace of mind when it comes to an urgent health concern and, hopefully, will also alleviate unnecessary trips to doctors or hospitals.’ How does it work? Bonitas parents, or their caregivers, simply call the Babyline number on 0860 999 121 to reach a paediatric trained nurse. Through a series of questions asked regarding the health issue, parents will be provided with professional advice on what to do next. Depending on the symptoms, the advice might be to head straight to the ER or to see a doctor or specialist. The nurse will advise which healthcare provider is the most appropriate, given the health issue. The services offered by the Babyline include: Home care advice Clinic/primary care/GP referral for the same day Clinic/primary care/GP referral for the following day After-hours care within the next six hours Immediate referral to the ER The Babyline service is available to members across all the Bonitas plans, for children under 3 years. ‘We do have to stress that although the Babyline is designed to assist parents with health concerns, nurses do not provide diagnosis or prescriptions. They are on call to offer advice on how best to deal with the current health problem or refer you to the nearest healthcare facility,’ concluded Bonitas Medical Fund.
It’s no longer a secret that the vast majority of us are blissfully unaware sugar addicts. Modern conveniences in consumables are great at making life easier in the short term, but what about the long term implications? A report published in 2009 showcases that food addiction is plausible as “brain pathways that evolved to respond to natural rewards are also activated by addictive drugs. Sugar releases opioids and dopamine and thus might be expected to have addictive potential.” A further report published in 2013 indicates that sugar is as, if not more, desirable than addictive drugs such as cocaine. This research aims to prove that “sugar and sweetness can induce reward and craving that are comparable in magnitude to those induced by addictive drugs”. With these two findings it’s hard to believe that as parents we are still largely oblivious to the long term, damaging effects of over consuming sugar-dense foods and beverages. So a sugar tax maybe introduced, this will certainly help moderate and potentially reduce the average consumption of free sugars (sugar added to food and drink, as well as sugar found naturally in honey, syrups, fruit juices and fruit juice concentrates). But it will take a deeper understanding of what we consume to avoid the top health issues South Africans currently face – obesity, diabetes and heart conditions? All directly resulting from amongst other factors, but largely to sugar-dense diets and little to no exercise. According to a statement released by the World Health Organisation “adults and children need to reduce their daily intake of free sugars to less than 10% of their total energy intake. A further reduction to below 5% or roughly 25 grams (6 teaspoons) per day would provide additional health benefits”. So what is a safe recommended daily allowance for sugar? Although we all lead different lifestyles and have varying metabolic requirements, the UK’s Scientific Advisory Committee on Nutrition (SACN) have suggested the following: • Children aged 4 to 6 should have no more than 19g or five teaspoons of free sugars per day • Children aged 7 to 10 should have no more than 24g or six teaspoons of free sugars per day •Children aged 11 years and upwards, as well as adults, should have no more than 30g or seven teaspoons of free sugar per day To illustrate what this means, take a look at some of the popular beverages our children love, and their approximate sugar contents: • 250ml iced tea = 19g or four teaspoons of free sugar • 250ml flavoured drinking yoghurt = 26.8 g or five and a half teaspoons of free sugar • 330ml cola = 35g or seven teaspoons of free sugar • 330ml ginger beer = 37g or six and a half teaspoons of free sugar Overcoming an addiction is by no means an easy feat and the same holds true for sugar dependency. Almost all modern convenience consumables contain added free sugar especially children’s favourites such as cereals, beverages, fast foods and treats. So how do we reduce the excess sugars from our diets? Become aware, understand that food is medicine and always try to ensure that that all consumables remain as close as possible to their natural state. If sweetening is required, look at healthier options such as fresh fruit or vegetables. Read labels carefully, not all free or added sugars are labelled as sugars. For example: agave nectar, corn sweetener, dextrose, honey, corn syrup, sucrose, fructose, glucose and molasses. Limit sugar added beverages, cited as being responsible for the majority of added sugar in US diets. Try naturally flavouring water or using a SodaStream to make fun, healthier drink options. Their syrups also comprise one third of the sugar compared to regular sodas. Reduce your family’s super sweet sugar tolerance with a moderated sugar and bolstered wholefood diet. Over time consumables high in sugar will start tasting too sweet as your tolerance returns to its normal natural state. Bake instead of buying treats. Homemade treats will no doubt contain less added and highly synthetic sweeteners, and you have the ability to further reduce the sugar content with natural sweeteners like fruits or vegetables. One favourite cupcake recipe calls for swapping out a large portion of the sugar for a glass of white wine, the alcohol cooks out and makes a delicious, moist cupcake. The key to all healthy living is moderation and a balanced diet. This is not to say indulgent foods high in fat and/or sugar can’t be enjoyed, they can, but just not daily. Herewith a quick and easy recipe from SodaStream, for more fun recipes, please visit www.sodastream.co.za/recipe/. Raspberry Coolers for Kids Ingredients 1 bottle SodaStream Zero Cranberry Raspberry Fresh organic raspberries Mint Instructions Prepare the SodaStream Zero Cranberry Raspberry (flavoured to your liking) Throw in fresh organic raspberries Garnish with mint
This is an excerpt from the “Unlearn” chapter in my book Mila’s Meals: The Beginning & The Basics. Disclaimer: As with everything concerning food there are two sides to any debate raging around every one of the topics in this chapter – both sides will be defended with scientific proof, and ‘absolute’ recommendations. I am merely presenting my beliefs formed by my research and first hand experience of both Mila’s, and my own digestive issues. I encourage you to do your own research should anything mentioned here not ‘sit well’ with you. I am not trying to convince you of anything – I simply hope to provide information, and at the very least prompt you to question what has previously or otherwise been presented as absolute fact and truth. “I’ve got to say I was fooled by this – by the clever marketing of the food companies and by the advice of the clinic sister. I fed her rice cereal (organic – but that really did not help the situation much). Poor thing! I stopped as quickly as I started (her tummy cramps were too awful after that first meal) and, this is why… Food has to be broken down into its nutrient components: amino acids, fatty acids, cholesterol, simple sugars, vitamins, minerals, etc. – our bodies absorb nutrients, not food. The body produces digestive enzymes that break down our food into nutrients. These nutrients are then absorbed and nourish the body. Digestive enzymes are produced in the pancreas, small intestine, saliva glands and stomach. Different digestive enzymes are needed to break down different types of food. In order to digest grains, your body uses an enzyme called amylase. Guess what? Pancreatic amylase is not produced by your little one (in sufficient quantities) until they are a year old – sometimes even later. The rule of thumb here is that it is not until your little one’s molar teeth are fully developed that they have sufficient quantities of pancreatic amylase to properly digest grains – this can be anywhere from 13 – 24 months of age. Amylase is provided in a mother’s breast milk and is produced by your little one’s saliva – but these are not sufficient to properly digest grains. Especially processed grains, or grains that have not been prepared properly. So what happens to this undigested rice cereal (or other grains)? Some undigested food (from other vegetable carbohydrate sources) benefits your little one – fermentation in the colon produces short chain fatty acids, which can improve nutrient absorption, enhance gut health, and even be used as a source of energy for both the microbes and baby. But since grains (especially) cannot be adequately digested, they start rotting. This rotting food matter feeds pathogenic bacteria and fungi (such as Candida) – and this imbalance can lead to food allergies, asthma, eczema, and other autoimmune disorders. Over time, the pathogenic bacteria and fungi (and their toxic by-products) create holes in the gut wall (known as Leaky Gut). A leaky gut allows toxins and partially digested food to spill directly into the blood creating an unpredictable mix of physical, behavioural, emotional and neurological symptoms. This is explained in great detail in Dr. Natasha Campbell-McBride’s book Gut and Psychology Syndrome. What else is wrong with commercially available rice cereal? Rice cereal is processed – meaning it is no longer a whole food. In order for the cereal to have a longer shelf life, the bran and the germ (the most nutritious parts) have been removed, simultaneously stripping the grain of its protein, fibre, nutrients and minerals. Artificial vitamins have to then be added back in – these are far less bio-available to your little one’s body and a poor replacement for nature’s version. Rice cereal is an extremely high glycaemic food – that is, it spikes the blood sugar. Rice cereal contains phytates (the salt form of phytic acid). Phytic acid is a naturally occurring chemical in grains, nuts and seeds. Phytic acid binds to essential minerals (such as calcium, copper, iron, zinc, and magnesium) in the digestive tract, making them less available to our bodies – and actually flushing them out of our bodies. While the majority of the phytic acid (or phytates) are found in the bran of the rice (which is removed during processing), there will still be some present. So, eating processed rice cereal may actually remove iron, zinc, calcium and magnesium from your little one’s body! Phytates also reduce the digestibility of starches, proteins, and fats. Please note that simply grinding grains at home and cooking them will result in an even higher amount of phytates in your little one’s food. All grains, nuts and seeds must be soaked, sprouted or fermented before cooking in order to break down the phytic acid. Please see the chapter Convenience vs. Conscience: Enzymes, Nutrients and Anti-nutrients in my book for more information on this. Commercial rice cereal fortified with iron. But surely this is a good thing? A baby is born with sufficient iron reserves to last them until they are 6 months old. While a mother’s breast milk is low in iron, the iron that is present is readily absorbed by her little one – as opposed to the artificial sources of iron found in fortified cereals and formula. While your little one may need additional sources of iron at the age of 6 months, it is far better to provide this from whole foods as opposed to supplemental drops or an additive in a nutrient deficient food. Good sources of additional iron are liver (raw), other cooked meat, blackstrap molasses, avocado and… soil! No, I am not suggesting you feed your little one soil, but the iron from soil is absorbed by the body. So a mouthful here and there while playing outside, as well as digging in the soil and walking barefoot is beneficial. Healthy soil is also a great source of probiotics! By healthy soil – I mean organic, not chemically fertilised and with
With summer season upon us, head lice will again be making their way into many homes. Thankfully, Controlice® helps moms to combat the infestations with a range of products designed to eliminate* and repel* head lice. All mom has to do is to decide whether she needs to eliminate or to repel head lice and then select the right Controlice® products for the job: When to eliminate head lice: When head lice are already in the hair, the clinically proven Controlice® Oil Spray or Controlice® Head Rinse are the best fit to eliminating the little monsters.* Once applied to the hair, Controlice® Oil Spray only requires a 15 minute application to kill live head lice. Controlice® Head Rinse requires an 8 hour application and is the best option for an overnight lice treatment. Both treatments must be reapplied again seven days after the initial treatment because that is when the little lice eggs, called nits, hatch. A Controlice® Lice Buster Comb or Controlice® Triple Comb should be used as a part of the treatment. These precision engineered combs can assist to remove nits attached onto the hair. Tip: Rest the child’s head on a paper towel on mom’s lap and let him/her watch TV while mom combs out the nits. When to repel head lice: If you hear that there is a head lice outbreak at your child’s school, or if you have managed to get rid of the little crawlers and don’t want them coming back, you can use the Controlice® Defence range on a daily basis. Controlice® Defence Shampoo or Controlice® Defence Spray are not suitable for eliminating a head lice infestation, but they can put up a line of defence to stop head lice from moving in.* Controlice® through a magnifying glass: Treating with either Controlice® Oil Spray or Controlice® Head Rinse Lotion and combing out nits Controlice® Oil Spray. The clinically tested formula of Controlice® Oil Spray has been shown to combat head lice infestations. It is formulated with plant oils including coconut, aniseed and ylang-ylang. Controlice® Oil Spray can be used as a treatment whenever required as head lice cannot build resistance to the product.* To kill adult lice, spray Controlice® Oil Spray onto dry hair. Work it through the hair with your hands until the entire head of hair is moist enough to glisten and feel slick. Wait for 15 minutes. Comb out the lice and nits from the hair with the Controlice® Lice Buster or Controlice® lice comb. Wash and rinse the hair with Controlice® Defence Shampoo or another shampoo. Repeat seven days later to avoid re-infestation.* Price and availability: Controlice® Oil Spray is available from selected pharmacies and retail stores at approximately R158 for a 60 ml bottle, which gives two to four treatments depending on the length of the hair. Controlice® Head Rinse Lotion has no chemical pesticides. Its active ingredient is dimethicone which forms a wax layer around lice that suffocates the lice to death.* The colourless and odourless liquid is worked through dry hair with the fingers or one of the Controlice® combs, and left on overnight or for eight hours. Then comb out the nits (lice eggs) and dead lice, before washing and rinsing out the hair. Repeat the treatment after seven days. Price and availability: Controlice® Head Rinse Lotion is available from selected pharmacies and retail stores at around R118 for per 100 ml bottle. Comb out with Controlice® Lice Buster Comb or Triple Comb While treatment is on the hair, de-tangle the hair with any comb. Then remove the nits (eggs) and dead lice from the hair with one of the Controlice® combs. It is recommended that mothers invest in one of the two Controlice® precision engineered combs either the Controlice® Triple Comb or the Controlice® Lice Buster. The Controlice® Lice Buster Comb is designed for long, curly or very thick hair. The Controlice® Triple Comb is ideal for short hair. Price and availability: Controlice® Triple Comb retails at around R83, the Lice Buster Comb at around R86, from selected pharmacies and retail stores. Prevent head lice in the first place with Controlice® Defence Shampoo and Controlice® Defence Spray Controlice® Defence Shampoo is an oil-based formulation with active ingredients that can assist to repel head lice and avoid re-infestation.* It can also be used to cleanse and condition children’s hair and is suitable for daily use. Price: approximately R79 per 125 ml bottle at selected pharmacies and retail stores. Controlice® Defence Spray is an oil-based formulation with active ingredients that can help to repel head lice and protect against a re-infestation.* Controlice® Defence Spray moisturises and detangles the hair, leaving it manageable and shiny. Price: around R79 for a 100 ml bottle at selected pharmacies and retail stores. *For a diagnosis or if symptoms persist, consult a medical practitioner. Efficacy of support may vary between users.
Teeth are designed to last a lifetime. Why do so many people suffer during their lifetime with dental issues? Why do people lose some of their teeth or all their teeth during their lifetime? We as health professionals have an obligation to help people become aware of how precious teeth are and how important it is to look after them properly. Teething is an awful time for both mother and child. It is often accompanied by a temperature, nappy rash, restlessness, drooling mouth and sore gums. Teething gel or powder will help. Teeth begin to erupt in a particular sequence and teething is usually complete by the age of two. The first teeth to erupt are the two lower front teeth followed by the upper front teeth and then the rest follow in succession going backwards. It is right at this early stage that one should take care of the teeth in the appropriate way. Rubbing the teeth with gauze is most effective until the child is old enough to accept a toothbrush in their mouth. Baby bottle syndrome may occur when the child is put to bed at night with milk in the bottle. The milk promotes the development of tooth decay very rapidly. The same applies with juice. Try water. It is the best. Start off with water and the child will not even be aware of the existence of any other alternative. If you have started with milk already, then wean the child off by diluting the contents of the bottle with water, bit by bit each day so the child will not notice the change that is taking place. Dental decay is a bacterial disease caused by the accumulation of plaque on the teeth. This provides a substrate for the normal bacteria that live in the mouth to aggregate. These bacteria metabolise the carbohydrates in the diet promoting tooth decay. Many mothers have a tendency to lick the dummy first before placing it in the child’s mouth. This is not recommended because of the transfer of bacteria from the mother’s mouth to the child. Brushing teeth with a young child is really a case of monkey see monkey do. If you as a parent show the child how enjoyable tooth brushing is, they will want to do the same. A children’s toothpaste with a pleasant flavour is well accepted. The size of the toothbrush is important. Small children small brush. The child may want to brush their own teeth to show independence. That’s fine to let them do that, but as the parent you should finish the job. Having been the parent of young children myself, I know how difficult it is to keep candy away from children. Better not to start if you can but peer pressure can be daunting. Stay away from lollipops or anything that allows the sugar to settle on the teeth for a lengthy period of time. How about trying a carrot instead! When should a child visit the dentist for the first time? The first visit can be at the age of about 3 to 4 and should be fun. All that the dentist would need to do is give the child a ride in the dental chair and perhaps blow some air on the hand to tickle. Coming away from the dentist with a sticker and colouring pad is fun. What about fluoride for a young child? Our water is fluoridated and the toothpaste is fluoridated. With effective brushing, adjunctive fluoride is probably not necessary. Some children have large gaps between their baby teeth and in some the teeth are tightly spaced. Don’t be alarmed about the gaps. The bigger the gaps the better because the baby teeth maintain the space for the permanent teeth to erupt from the age of 6 to 7. At the same time as you see the permanent teeth erupting in the front of the mouth, the first permanent molars also begin to appear. These teeth are extremely vulnerable to tooth decay and need very special care and attention to maintain their health. These are the teeth that many adults lose at an early age because of inadequate attention to plaque control. Parents have a responsibility towards their children’s dental health. The permanent teeth continue to erupt through to the age of 11 to 12. Whilst this happens, the deciduous (baby) teeth fallout. You may wonder what has happened to the roots of these teeth. They are resorbed as the permanent teeth make their entry into the mouth. The anticipation of losing baby teeth and welcoming the tooth fairy is every child’s delight. How much does the fairy deposit? Well that, we leave to you. An adjunct to monitoring the effectiveness of tooth brushing, is the use of disclosing solution which can be bought over the counter in the form of a tablet which is dissolved in the mouth and stains the plaque pink. It is then easy for the young person to see the plaque and exercise effective tooth brushing. Many children require orthodontic treatment to assist in the development of their permanent teeth. Your dentist may refer you to an orthodontist in the early teenage years or even slightly younger. Regular topical application of fluoride in the dental office is recommended from an early stage through adolescence. Fissure sealants are also recommended to protect the developmental grooves on the six-year-old molars. Again, teeth are designed to last a lifetime. How wonderful it is for a child to jump out of the dentist chair and exclaim, “Look Ma, no cavities”
4 Ways to Improve Your Living Authentically, So you can be a living Example for Your Children So They can grow into adults who are content within themselves. I was sitting in the third row close to the middle when the man on the stage said, “if you are not true to yourself, then it is impossible to lead others.” The year was 2000 and the man was John C. Maxwell. Over the years, John’s words have again and again come back to me. The question he asked. Are you being true to yourself? Over the years I have asked over 7,500 parents the same question. Parenting requires authenticity. I define authenticity as the alignment of belief, thought, words, and actions in your everyday living. This requires a time of self-focus on those four areas. Examination of Beliefs Most people think they know what they believe. However, when I ask parents to write down their top ten values most get stuck at five, several get to seven no one has gotten to ten. So, write down those values. How far did you get? We will get back to that. Paying attention your thoughts and your beliefs flow together with them.The old saying as a man thinks in his heart, so he becomes. Is true. Our thoughts are affected by our beliefs. So, another way to check our beliefs is to examine our thoughts. How does what you think reflect your beliefs or what you thought you believed? Get the two to line up. Once your beliefs and thinking are fully aligned it helps the two outer or public areas to fall into place. Your values are the most closely tied to your beliefs. However, your conscious thoughts are framed by your unconscious values. If your values and your thoughts are at odds you can live a very conflict cited love fe. Get these three aligned an your authenticity living will flow much smoother. Once the inner self is examined, do your words and actions align with your beliefs and your thoughts to reflect authenticity? Monitor what Comes Out of Your Mouth What we think we often end up saying. In addition, what we say little ears hear and they repeat. More importantly little hearts hear and believe. This determines not only what they believe about themselves and the world. It creates the beliefs they use to create their own authenticity. One thing to always remember is you are the authority in your child’s life. Whatever you say they will both believe and internalize. We often say words are not important, but the truth is words are the most powerful force for good or ill in the world. Behave in Ways which Reinforce your Authenticity If I said it to one parent I have said it to thousands. “”Do as I say, not as I do”. Does not work, and it never did. The absolute truth is if you want a better life for your children, and every parent does. You have to live the life you want them to exceed. Parents are the model children emulate for their lives. How to Use Authenticity in Parenting. I have a question for you. Are you talking about and encouraging your children to live the same way through conversation and moral support? Living authentic lives requires coaching and mentoring. Parents can talk about children living their lives based on what they themselves believe. As long as it does not cause hurt, harm, or danger parents can support a child’s belief, even if they know their children need more information to make a better choice. Teaching kids to live authentically requires all five steps of mentoring. The five steps of mentoring are teaching, coaching, counseling, negotiating, and listening. Teaching authentic living requires living it, talking about your successes and challenges, listening to your children talking about their successes and challenges, clearing up misconceptions and discussing mistakes. Coaching requires being there to listen and give feedback. Counseling means being a siding board and asking thought providing questions, then leaving them to make their own decisions. Negotiating comes into play as you discover real differences between you. You need to work through your differences, and come up with something you can both live with. Listening with both an open mind and an open heart is the only way to help your child to develop true authenticity. In this world being true to yourself is not easy. Getting there is difficult, but getting there and helping your children get there, makes life worth living. Living in ways which are gratifying in immeasurable ways. Good Luck! Resources Using an Authenticity Audit can help you to begin aligning your beliefs, thoughts, words, and actions. Here is a link to one. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8j-VyDAbY_k
Most people who can still remember their teenage years will remember a sometimes wild and inappropriate game of Dare, Truth and Promise. I enjoy games of all sorts, and I find that most kids do too, so I propose a reinvention of this crazy game with an alternative motive – to get to know your kids, to build family spirit and to help them through things they might be struggling with. It works like this: You have a bottle or something you can spin (yes, I know you all remember spin the bottle too!) and everyone sits in a circle. You spin the bottle and the person that it lands up facing has to decide whether they are going to choose Dare, Truth or Promise. Once they’ve made their choice, one of the other family members can entice them to do something (Dare), or ask them a question (Truth) or give them a task for the next week (Promise). Each family member will have a chance to be the one giving the instructions or asking the questions, so the adults don’t get to just boss everyone around like they usually do. Keep this in mind when you think up your tasks – it may come back to bite you! It can be fun to have a points and rewards system or a penalty for dares attempted or not attempted, truths told or lies caught out, and promises fulfilled or not. The idea though is to keep it light and fun. So that’s the basics of the game as we’ve always played it. Here’s how it can be adapted, keeping in mind that it is only as limited as your imagination. DARE The idea here is to get your kids out of their comfort zones and help them to grow and extend themselves. Offer enough challenge to be slightly uncomfortable, but not so much as to be distressing. Some ideas… Help them to face their fears: Challenge your child to do something that normally makes them nervous (note – nervous, not terrified) eg. Run into a dark room, go to the toilet by themselves, look under the bed, hold a spider (a harmless one, of course). Help them to step out socially: Dare them to tell someone something that they’ve been putting off, to ask someone to be their friend, to write a love letter to someone they like. Get them to try new things: Dare them to taste a new food, to smell something weird, to touch something with an icky texture. Help them to learn something: Challenge them to learn to spell a difficult word, to memorise something, to tackle a problem, to finish a puzzle, to figure something out. Help them to become independent: Challenge them to try tying a shoelace, dressing themselves, washing their own hair, making their own breakfast. TRUTH Get to know your kids by asking questions that they may not always answer or that you wouldn’t normally ask in everyday conversation. Some examples: What is your greatest fear? What is the best dream you’ve ever had? Who makes you smile? What was the last lie you told? What do you love about yourself? Have you ever kissed a boy/girl? What is the naughtiest thing you’ve ever done? What is the kindest thing you’ve ever done? What is something that someone in this family does that makes you mad? What do you love most about living here? PROMISE Get your kids to help out around the house as part of the game (here is where a points system really pays off) or to do something that they normally avoid. Make sure you have a mix of fun and not-so-fun tasks to keep them interested. Remember to choose this option yourself when playing so that they can also get you to do things that they would like. Some examples: Clean up the dog poo for 2 days Help to prepare one dinner Make your bed for a week Bring me tea in bed Find a sneaky way to do something fun for someone in the family De-weed the garden Wash the car Give someone a foot massage Do something nice for a sibling Not bite your nails for a day Remember that it’s a game and therefore supposed to be fun. Children are wired to play, so if you can link what you want them to do or what you want to learn from them to something playful they are far more likely to cooperate. This is one way to do that. Happy gaming!
“A new fact on migraines and participating in sport” Claims that participating in sporting activities is detrimental for migraine patients are untrue – a new study found that participating in sporting activities actually has health benefits for migraine patients. The study, recently published in the Sports Neurology Journal ascertains that under Neurological supervision sporting activities can be safely integrated into the lives of migraine patients. This is the first time empirical research has been done to review known risks involved with participating in sporting activities by migraine patients. “It was a study that sampled patients with; epilepsy, migraines, and multiple sclerosis”, says Dr. Elliot Shevel, South Africa’S migraine research pioneer and the medical director of The Headache Clinic. Shevel confirmed that as long as there is proper supervision in place for migraine patients, playing sport is not harmful. Dr. Elliot Shevel says that migraine patients are often discouraged from participating in sports based on theoretical detrimental effects, when in actual fact they can and should be encouraged to participate in sports provided that the exercise does not trigger the pain. Where exposure to prolonged sun triggers the pain indoor sports should be pursued. With schools re-opening and sporting activities being part of the academic experience, children that suffer with migraine should take the time with parents and teachers to work out which sporting activities suit them best. To find out more about how migraines affect your child, call 0861 678 911 or visit www.theheadacheclinic.net
Last year was the hottest year on earth since record-taking began, but 2016 is expected to blow this record out of the water, which according to experts could trigger so-called ‘super allergies’. Mariska van Aswegen, spokesperson for Pharma Dynamics – a leading provider of antihistamine medication – says the weather and atmospheric temperature make a huge difference to the levels of pollen and other irritants such as dust and diesel particulates in the air. “The downside of a long, hot summer is that these irritants stay suspended in the air for longer, entering the mouth or nose and landing on the delicate mucosal layer of the upper airways. Once these particles land on the membranes that line the airways, the allergen diffuses into it, setting off an allergic reaction. Not only could symptoms worsen, but hot and dry conditions could result in an extended pollen season. The hayfever season typically starts with trees pollinating from August until October. However, grass pollen then takes over with its greatest peak from November to March. “According to SA’s foremost authorities on aerobiology, climate change will significantly increase the amount of pollen in the air with average world temperatures forecast to rise 3°C to 4ºC by as early as 2060. Warmer temperatures allow trees to pollinate earlier and longer than usual. Spring in many countries already begins much earlier than a few decades ago, which means that pollen-producing plants, such as flowers, trees, grasses and weeds have a much longer pollen-producing season than in the past. Should the predicted combination of prolonged periods of warm, dry weather with intervals of some wet weather occur, we’ll experience high grass pollen counts for some time,” she remarks. Not only is this depressing news for the estimated 30% of South Africans that suffer from hayfever, but the extended hot and dry conditions could also trigger nasal allergies in those who haven’t previously suffered from hayfever. To make matters worse, people who live in towns and cities where there are higher levels of traffic pollution are at greater risk. Van Aswegen points out that the tiny particulates released by diesel fuel irritate the lining of the nasal passages and lungs making them more sensitive. “When an allergen such as pollen is also present, the airways are already primed to react, which could lead to a more severe allergic response. “Pollution may even make other airborne allergens more potent as some pollen-producing plants exposed to high levels of nitrogen oxide may spawn modified pollen that is more potent and can elicit a more severe allergic episode, also referred to as super allergies.” To ensure that super allergies don’t get in the way of your summer holiday plans, van Aswegen gives the following advice: Get pollen-wise:check the pollen forecast in your area or holiday spot (online or in the local newspaper) to plan your outdoor activities and avoid being outside when the pollen count is highest, which is usually early in the morning and evening. Also find out which pollen you’re allergic to via a skin-prick test or blood test to detect specific IgE (immunoglobulin E) antibodies.. Remember to keep doors and windows closed during peak pollen times. When the outdoors beckon: apply balm or petroleum jelly around the rim of your nose which can act as a pollen-trap. Alternatively, block pollen and other irritants by wearing a mask or bandanna over your nose and mouth. If the pollen count is very high, opt for less intense exercises. The faster you breathe, the more allergens and irritants you inhale. Traveling by plane: make sure your epinephrine injection (used to treat a severe allergic reaction known as anaphylaxis) is within date and always carry a spare. Pack these in your hand luggage along with a supply of antihistamines. If you are prone to anaphylaxis, obtain a written letter from your doctor explaining why the medicine you carry is essential, to ensure you don’t get delayed at customs. If you’re traveling alone, let the pilot or air hostess know of your condition. Do the same if you’re traveling with friends and make sure they know how to administer the emergency medication. Also have the names of those who should be contacted in an emergency handy. Using a saline nasal spray every hour could also help keep your nasal membranes moist. Planning a road trip: turn your car’s air conditioner on 10 minutes before you get in the car, preferably with the windows open, which will help remove dust and mould from the air-conditioning (AC) system. Keep car windows closed when driving to prevent pollen and other irritants from entering the car. If you’re hiring a car, ask for a model that comes with a high efficiency particulate filter as part of the AC system. Staying at a hotel: bring your own hypoallergenic pillow and mattress cover or ask for an allergy-proof room where no smoking or pets are allowed. Avoid red and swollen eyes:protect your eyes during the day by wearing sunglasses and rinsing contact lenses to get rid of dust and pollen particles. If your allergies have left you with itchy, red eyes, then take eye-drops to reduce the symptoms. “When it comes to essential hayfever treatments, such as antihistamines, these should be taken early on in the season to be most effective. If you haven’t started, start taking them now to reduce symptoms,” concludes Van Aswegen.
Most medical aids have launched their benefits and premium contributions for 2017 and, as in the past, the increases passed on to members are double figures, which outstrip inflation. Bear in mind that your actual increase may be somewhat different because often these are weighted, vary from option to option or even from dependant to dependant. The medical aid landscape can be tricky to navigate. So now, more than ever, is the time to learn how to ‘box smart’ to ensure that you maximise the value you derive from your medical scheme benefits. Dr Bobby Ramasia, Principal Officer of Bonitas Medical Fund, provides some insight into maximising the benefits on your chosen medical aid. Understand your benefits Take the time to read the information sent to you by the scheme and/or your broker. If you have access to information sessions at your place of work, or have a consultant who visits your workplace, attend the sessions to get a better understanding. Getting the best out of your hospital cover: If your scheme has appointed a Designated Service Provider (DSP) network for hospitals, you will usually pay a lower monthly contribution in exchange for using a hospital from this network for planned procedures. In the same manner, if your scheme has an arrangement in place for doctors and specialists, there will usually be an incentive (full cover by the scheme) for using ‘these’ providers. The penalty for using providers not contracted with the scheme is usually the payment of shortfalls or co-payments. For planned procedures, it’s also worth checking with your scheme if you will obtain better cover by using contracted providers or having the procedure performed in the doctor’s rooms or day clinic, where possible If you are going to be admitted to hospital for a planned procedure, always check with your scheme, at authorisation stage, if there are any co-payments or sub-limits that will apply. An example here is for joint replacements, where most schemes have specified sub-limits if you do not use their DSP. Chronic Illness Benefits: In terms of the Medical Schemes Act, there are 26 common chronic illnesses which all options on all schemes are required to cover for medication and treatment. However, here too, schemes have the ability to apply measures designed to contain costs. Almost all options on all medical schemes apply a medicine formulary. This is a list of drugs which the scheme will cover in full. If you use medication that is not on the scheme’s formulary, you will be liable for the difference in cost. So it is best to discuss the formulary medication with your doctor to see if this is appropriate for you The schemes can also specify that you obtain your medication from DSP pharmacies. Check to see if you are able to use the scheme’s DSP – if there are none close to you, most schemes also designate a courier pharmacy which will deliver the medication to you at a preferred address. So, the golden rule for chronic illness benefits is to try to utilise the medication on your scheme’s formulary and to obtain this from a specified pharmacy. Many medical schemes also cover additional chronic illnesses – although this is usually from the more expensive options. If your particular condition is not covered on your current option it is worth further investigation. It’s important to understand that this cover is at the scheme’s discretion and the additional conditions covered vary from scheme to scheme. Know your rights! In terms of a High Court ruling, Medical Schemes are obliged to meet the cost of in-hospital Prescribed Minimum Benefit procedures at cost, in full. Make sure you know what ‘in full’ means – so you don’t get any surprises. So if you have been admitted to hospital check with your doctor if it’s for one of these procedures. If so, as a general rule, you shouldn’t be saddled with any shortfalls – so ask for your broker/consultant’s assistance if you are! Why you might have co-payments A medical aid co-payment is a fee that the member is liable for when making use of certain medical services. The medical aid would not cover 100% of the costs and the member would have to pay for a certain percentage of the medical service before the medical aid pays their portion. These co-payments usually apply to specialist or elective medical procedures. This will differ from one medical aid scheme to another. It is one of the reasons why you should always do thorough research before deciding which medical aid scheme is the best option for you. The ideal option would, of course, be the one that does not require many or any co-payments from the member. If your benefits and/or savings were exhausted before the end of the year and you had to pay out-of-pocket for some medical expenses; it might save you money to upgrade to a richer plan with more benefits, albeit at a higher contribution amount. Conversely, if you are young, healthy and generally did not utilise your benefits and/or savings, it may be prudent to downgrade to a cheaper medical aid option Talk to your providers! Talk to your doctor/specialist before being admitted to hospital for a planned procedure. Check what they are going to be charging and what your scheme will cover. If there is a large difference don’t be afraid to approach your doctor to see if they are prepared to adjust their fee, especially if you could afford to pay upfront.
Many people are struggling with parenting given all of today’s modern technology, especially when it comes to the many omnipresent screens that children are currently using. Our grandparents were likely more concerned with a single screen, the one found on a lone television set in the living room. But nowadays, kids have a plethora of screens on their smartphones, tablets, televisions, computers, both at home and school. To ensure their children’s visual acuity remained intact, past parents from generations gone by were likely reminding kids to sit further away from the T.V. and limiting their screen time. So what are the recommended screen times to ensure today’s children aren’t suffering visually, mentally or emotionally? According to recent news reports, pediatricians have changed their antiquated and outdated recommendations for screens when it comes to the time kids spend using these devices currently. While experts still believe children younger than two shouldn’t be exposed to this type of digital technology, 30% of tots in diapers are comfortable using mobile devices. Paediatricians have also tweaked their recommendations about toddlers and screen exposure to include times it’s used to video chat with another parent or close relative. Screen time should also be age appropriate and younger usage should always be monitored. For example, for those children over the age of two and younger than five: Limit screen time to one hour per day and watch along with them to see how they’re absorbing and reacting to the content Avoid screen time that’s associated with either placating them or keeping them distracted Test apps or pre-watch visual materials before allow children to use or view them During meals, playtime or when in their rooms should all be screen-free zones No matter their age, parents should always be on the lookout for violent and inappropriate websites and other forms of technology. Parental controls were invented for a reason. School Aged Children Parents, teachers, faculty and physicians are all encouraged to work together in creating a “media plan” since there’s really no “one-size-fits-all” approach for children as they continue to mature. For example, research has shown that adolescent use of social media can be beneficial for their development, give them exposure to new ideas and promote circles of emotional support from their peers. On the other hand, too much time spent on these platforms can lead to depression, weight gain and a lack of sleep. Keep in mind that parents should: Be consistent, but at the same time, allow for some flexibility when it comes to circumstances like a special school project that may require online research Avoid the use of media at least an hour before bedtime and as mentioned previously, it’s not allowed during meals or other family times Communicate these guidelines to caregivers and babysitters to ensure they’re being enforced when you’re not in the picture Be sure to have ongoing discussions with your child about cyberbullying and what is (and is not) appropriate behaviour, posting and content on the world wide web. There’s a new-age idiom being used today that recommends parents advise their children to avoid posting or viewing anything that their grandparent would find offensive. It’s not only about how much time a child spends online, but how they are occupying themselves while on the internet. There should be a balance between engaging in valuable content and experiences with some recreational usage while they’re using their devices. As with almost anything else that goes with family and parenting, it’s all about balance.
