Child - Parenting Hub

Advice from the experts

Unpacking common myths around child drowning

Whether you have a pool or have small children in your family or social circle, everyone needs to learn about pool safety. Being able to identify a drowning in progress and acting fast can make a real difference to the child making a full recovery after a drowning incident. Most people imagine that picture A is an accurate depiction of a drowning in progress. In reality, B and C are more accurate – mouth at water level, head bobbing, body upright, little to no splashing and sometimes the appearance of doing doggie paddle. Familiarise yourself with these drowning behaviours: Head low in the water, mouth at water level Head tilted back with mouth open Trying to roll over onto the back to float Hair falling over the forehead or eyes Body is vertical/ upright Eyes glassy & empty, unable to focus Eyes open, with fear evident on the face Hyperventilating or gasping Trying to swim in one direction but without progress Common Drowning Myths Myth: Drowning children will shout for help Drowning children are physiologically unable to call out. The respiratory system is designed for breathing – speech is the secondary function. Drowning children’s mouths alternately sink below and reappear above the surface but while their mouth is above the surface, they need to exhale and inhale before they sink again. There is not enough time to cry out. Myth: Drowning children are unsupervised children 50% of all child drownings will occur 25 metres or less from an adult who was distracted for only a few seconds. Myth: Drowning children wave their arms to attract attention or will thrash in the water Drowning children cannot wave for help. Physiologically, a person who is drowning cannot perform voluntary movements such as waving or moving towards a rescuer. Envisage the surface of the water as a platform. Someone who is drowning often presses down on the surface and tries to use it as leverage to get their mouth above the water’s surface to breathe. So what the onlooker sees are arm movements that can appear to be playful swimming. Children will not kick wildly either. They remain upright in the water with no evidence of a supporting kick. They are quiet, focused only on breathing and show no signs of violent struggle. The child’s struggle is quick — 20 seconds, whereas an adult struggles for 60 seconds. Myth: My child has had swimming lessons so he / she won’t drown No child is ever drown-proof, no matter how good their swimming skills. A few swimming lessons are no guarantee when it comes to drowning prevention. Myth: Water wings and flotation aids will prevent drowning Water wings give a dangerous and false sense of security, often making children think they are stronger swimmers than they actually are. Flotation aids can also suddenly deflate. To prevent a tragedy, be vigilant about pool safety and cover your pool with the leading safety cover from PowerPlastics Pool Covers – The PowerPlastics Solid Safety Cover which also complies with local safety regulations. This cover also saves water, power and chemical input, giving you safety as well as savings, and it brings a beautiful finish to the outdoor living area. Learn more and shop online at www.powerplastics.co.za

October 23, 2023

Beating heatstroke

Bonitas Medical Fund offers some advice about heatstroke. What the symptoms are, how to avoid it and what to do if someone, child or adult, develops heatstroke.

October 20, 2023

How can I raise a body positive child?

With media bombarding our children from a very young age with images of what they think a person’s body should be – raising a body positive child is harder than it was 20 years ago.

October 18, 2023

Emotional and Social Milestones of a 6-year-old

Why it’s important to nurture empathy in kids? Parents should consider teaching empathy and nurturing emotional intelligence in their children for several reasons. In its most basic form, empathy is the ability to put oneself in another’s shoes and comprehend their emotions and experiences. Empathy can also be useful in teaching children about bullying and how to avoid it. Thus, teaching empathy is an important factor in preventing bullying at school. How can parents encourage emotional intelligence and empathy in their children? Make sure your child’s emotional needs are met – To be able to feel and express empathy for another person, a child’s emotional needs must first be satisfied. Before she can help someone else, she must be able to rely on her parents and caregivers for emotional support. Teach your child how to cope with negative emotions – Negative emotions like anger and jealousy are common in children and adults. A child with good emotional intelligence and empathy is more likely to be taught how to handle these feelings positively in a problem-solving manner by sympathetic parents. Ask, “How would you feel?” – When a pre-schooler smacks a sibling or a friend or takes away a toy they’re playing with, a parent should explain that such action might hurt a person. “How would you feel if someone took your toy away?” or “How would you feel if someone smacked you?” are some examples of questions to use. Name that feeling – Identify and categorize feelings and emotions as much as possible to assist your child in understanding them. If your child behaves kindly toward someone, you can say: “That was very good of you to be so worried about your friend; I’m sure it made him feel much better when you were so kind to him. If your child behaves unpleasantly, you can say: “I understand you may be angry, but it made your friend sad when you stole his toy from him.” Talk about positive and negative behaviours around you – In real life, as well as in books, television, and movies, we are always exposed to instances of good and bad behaviour. Discuss with your child any behaviour you notice, such as someone making another person upset or acting like a bully, or someone helping others and making them feel better about themselves. Set a good example – By watching you and other adults in their lives, your child learns how to interact with others. Show them what it is to be helpful or kind and loving. You can teach your child to be sympathetic by helping family members and neighbours and supporting friends and those in need or going through a difficult time.

October 17, 2023

What does crossing the midline really mean?

There are many terms that teachers, psychologists and other professionals may use that, at times, are perhaps not explained effectively leaving parents at a loss to the significance of these difficulties. It is important to understand what the importance of these conditions are, (especially if they have been mentioned in your child’s school report) what they mean, and the possible consequences and repercussions thereof. The midline is akin to an imaginary line going down the middle of one’s body from head to toe. Midline crossing is important for many skills to develop later on. For example, midline crossing is important for a youngster to develop the ability to use one hand to write across the entire page. This will also determine whether the youngster will have the necessary skills to read the length of the sentence across the page from left to right A child who can’t cross the midline, for instance, would use his/her left hand to write or paint on the left-side of the page and his/her right hand to write or paint on the right-hand side of the page which can hamper the learning process. Crossing the midline is also an indicator of bilateral co-ordination which is the ability to use both sides of the body and brain simultaneously. This is important for gross motor skills such as climbing stairs, walking, riding a bicycle and swimming. In addition, bilateral co-ordination is also important to read, write and learn. In other words, the right and left brain have to work together, for example in reading the left brain’s task is to decode a word whilst the right brain facilitates the understanding and meaning of what was read. Midline crossing is therefore essential for a youngster to develop as it is a very necessary skill for learning in all areas of life.

October 17, 2023

The fine line between discipline and punishment

Discipline vs punishment What really helps vulnerable children build confidence and self-control? As a normal part of their development, all children test boundaries and break rules, but how parents respond to these moments has an undeniable effect on their child, whether positive or negative. And this is magnified for vulnerable children who live with foster parents or who have been adopted. Parents are human too, and they have to navigate their own emotions while parenting, but it’s important that they carefully consider their responses to their children when they misbehave. This includes understanding the difference between punishment and discipline. Beverley Beukes, MD of Oasis Haven, a registered Child and Youth Care Centre in Johannesburg, explains that punishment is imposed on a child by their parent, after the fact. “The child misbehaves and the parent reacts to that behaviour, which frequently results in a power struggle and vicious cycle.” Discipline, by contrast, is established before the fact and is based on a child’s needs. A parent provides guidelines for their child and gives them latitude to work within those guidelines, establishing consequences for failing to do so. “The ultimate goal of parental discipline is to wrap just enough structure around a child so that they can begin to develop self-control, the precursor of self-discipline,” says Beukes. So what does healthy discipline look like? Aim for connection over control “An important premise to begin with is that discipline needs to happen in the context of connection. It can’t be about control – without connection, parents will constantly be trying to control behaviour,” explains Simone Oketch, social worker at Oasis Haven. Vulnerable children will often set out to test their parents. They may display aggressive, inappropriate and unkind behaviours to see how far they need to go before their new parents will reject them. Parents need to see beyond those behaviours, and stay focused on the long-term goals of attaching and forming a healthy relationship. “If you help your child calm down and connect with you, even when you are correcting their behaviour, you will create an environment where they can flourish,” says Oketch. Understand your child Parents often think of their child in terms of their chronological age, but it’s important to consider their emotional age too, which may be significantly younger in some cases. Parents need to adjust their expectations and the words they use when talking through boundaries to meet their child’s developmental stage. Approach discipline in small increments Behaviour change takes time. “Seeing the long-term picture can help parents avoid thinking of misbehaviour as failure – as a vulnerable child’s fear lessens, they will not always have an immediate fight, flight, or freeze reaction. During this process the child can learn the cause and effect of their actions,” says Beukes. Rethink more ‘traditional’ consequences Beukes and Oketch’s experience working with vulnerable children has given them unique insights into how to help these children flourish. “Children who have had multiple broken bonds or who have experienced abuse often do not respond well to traditional methods of discipline,” says Beukes. Things such as time out and being grounded, among other approaches, might exacerbate the problem. Many parents can become quite discouraged and confused when this happens. Hidings are one of the most unhelpful approaches adoptive and foster parents can use. It is also illegal to spank children in South Africa, so it’s important that parents avoid any physical punishment. Some practical tools parents can rather use include earning or losing privileges, charting children’s behaviour so they can see their own progress and stay motivated over the long term, providing choices, talking to their child about their feelings, having weekly family meetings, and getting professional support through a therapist. If a child is provided with consistent and effective discipline, not only will their behaviour improve, but so will their relationship with their parents. “All children need to know is that their parent’s love for them is unconditional,” says Oketch. Oketch and Beukes have written a guide called Strengthening Families in a South African Context, sponsored by Ambassadors for Good, which provides an overview of foster care, adoption and family preservation, as well as guidance for statutory and adoption social workers on supporting families. For more information, visit www.oasishaven.org. About Oasis Haven Oasis Haven is a registered Child and Youth Care Centre with two family homes in Robin Hills, Johannesburg, with capacity for 10 children in each home. But we are more than that – we are a big, loving, messy family made up of children, house parents, staff, volunteers, donors and the community we live and work in. Our vision is for every vulnerable child to be in a loving, forever family. Our mission is to break the cycle of vulnerable children by loving them as our own and working to provide family through adoption or in our Family Homes. We focus on quality care, education and therapy, rooted in faith.

October 5, 2023

The best products for healthy babies and children

Babies and children require seemingly few products to stay healthy, but as they age, most parents realise that there are some essentials that do not only boost and improve their child’s health, but also makes the parents’ lives easier. While requirements vary from family to family, there are a few basics that are considered beneficial for young ones. Here are a few products we recommend: Health care products Every household needs quick and easy access to a first aid kit or health care kit. When you need it, it’s usually to attend to an immediate problem, meaning there’s no time to search around. First-time parents sometimes aren’t sure what exactly they’ll need for baby’s first aid kit, which is why it’s will be handy if you have a pre-packed kit filled with the basics. We recommend the Safety First Healthcare Kit (R289.99), an 11-piece kit containing all the basics you’ll need for baby’s basic health needs. From a nasal aspirator, to a digital thermometer, medicine dropper and soft grip toothbrush, this handy kit covers all the basics. Grooming products Babies might not need much grooming to start off with, but as soon as they’re a little bit older you’ll need to look into nail clippers, hairbrushes, and other basic grooming items. Like with a health care kit, it might be difficult for first-time parents to know exactly which items to buy. The Safety First Essential Grooming Kit (R229.95) is a handy 10-piece kit containing all the good quality basics you’ll need, such as a comb, hairbrush, nail clippers, nail files and more. Breast pump Breastfeeding moms know that there comes a time – be it when you return to work, or when you need to pop out – that a good quality breast pump becomes a lifesaver. Whether you pump because you can’t physically be with your baby to breastfeed, or whether it’s to allow dad and other family members to help out with feeding, many women find pumping easy and convenient – with the right pump, of course. Medela Harmony Essentials Pack (R999.95) combines everything moms need for breast milk pumping in one breast pump set. It comes complete with a silicone teat, four milk storage bags to store and freeze your milk, and four ultra-thin nursing pads: everything you need to express and store your breast milk and feed it to your baby. This single manual breast pump is perfect for moms who want to try out pumping, moms who express occasionally and need a lightweight travel companion, or moms who want a handy backup to their electric pump. Quality bottles On the days that you’re pumping, you’ll need some quality bottles with which to store your baby’s milk. It’s important to choose a brand that makes use of materials safe for baby, that’s convenient and durable. Medela Milk Storage Bottles 2-Pack (R339.99) are free from Bisphenol (BPA) for your baby’s health, dishwasher and microwave safe for your convenience and ideal for expressing, storing, freezing, and feeding breastmilk. A good quality multivitamin Let’s face it – most parents struggle to get their children to eat vegetables, and picky eaters often end up lacking many of the essential nutrients needed for healthy growth. This is where multivitamins come in. A good quality supplement contributes to the normal function of the immune systems and the normal function of many other systems in the body contributing to general wellbeing. We recommend: NutriPure Kids Multi-Vitamin Complete (R126.95) which is specially formulated in a tasty, soft, and chewy gummy, making taking vitamins fun and easy for children aged three and older. Each NutriPure Multi-Vitamin Complete gummy contains 11 essential vitamins and minerals: Vitamin D, B6, B12, C, Biotin, Pantothenic Acid and Niacin to help metabolize carbohydrates, fats, and proteins. An effective probiotic Probiotics are an essential supplement for all ages. A balanced intestinal micro-flora is highly important in keeping the body in healthy working order and is a key element in overall well-being. Plus, it helps us to better metabolize all the healthy nutrients we consume in foods. We recommend: NutriPure Kids Pro-Biotics (R139.95), which is formulated with Bifidobacterium infantis and Lactobacillus rhamnosus, two scientifically tested bacteria strains. Each NutriPure bear contains one billion live cultures to help your child boost his daily culture intake.

October 4, 2023

A FATHER’S IMPACT ON A CHILD’S DEVELOPMENT

Affinity Health, a leading provider of high-quality health cover, underscores the crucial role fathers play in their child’s development and highlights the adverse effects of limited or no access to fathers during a child’s formative years. The Human Sciences Research Council reports that in South Africa, over 60% of children do not reside with their biological fathers, with only 20% seeing their biological father bi-weekly. A detailed report from Statistics South Africa (STATS SA) further reveals racial disparities: only 31.7% of black children aged 0-17 live with their biological fathers, compared to 51.3% of coloured children, 86.1% of Indian and Asian children, and 80.2% of white children. “Across multiple cultures and societies, the role of a father has conventionally been seen as secondary to that of a mother. While mothers are often considered the primary caregivers, the importance of a father’s influence cannot be understated,” says Murray Hewlett, CEO of Affinity Health. “A child’s emotional, mental, and even physical development can be significantly influenced by their relationship or lack thereof with their father, especially during a child’s formative years, from birth to age eight.” The Crucial Influence of a Father The importance of a father’s role in a child’s life has been the subject of extensive research over the years. Studies consistently highlight the significant influence that a supportive and involved father has on the holistic development of a child. Emotionally Balanced Adults The U.S. Department of Health & Human Services discovered that children with involved fathers, even in the context of high levels of maternal involvement, tend to score better in cognitive tests. For example, preschoolers with engaged fathers exhibit enhanced verbal abilities, while girls who share a close and nurturing bond with their fathers demonstrate superior math competencies. Meanwhile, boys benefiting from a strong paternal presence typically achieve higher grades and outperform their peers on assessment tests relative to their age level. Sociability, Confidence, and Resilience Research from the Imperial College London noted that infants with more involved fathers develop better problem-solving skills, demonstrating increased resilience when faced with challenges. Behavioural Issues, Emotional Insecurities, and Academic Struggles The National Fatherhood Initiative reported that children living in father-absent homes are almost four times more likely to be poor and twice as likely to drop out of school. Relationship Challenges and Teaching Trust A study from the University of British Columbia reported that children with absent fathers tend to enter relationships earlier and are more likely to have children outside of wedlock or get divorced. A Growing Concern A rising concern is the number of fathers not permitted to play an active role in their children’s lives due to various circumstances, often stemming from personal conflicts, legal battles, or societal norms and stigmas. “The issue of children growing up without fathers in South Africa has been a significant concern,” adds Hewlett. “The issue is further compounded by complexities related to the definition of ‘father absence’. Some children might not live with their biological fathers but have contact with them or receive financial support. Others might have father figures like stepfathers, uncles, or grandfathers playing a significant role in their upbringing.” Talking from Experience Jamie Lawson, now 25, was separated from her father until age 18 due to familial disputes. On finally reconnecting, she said, “Growing up, there was always this void, this piece of the puzzle that was missing. When I finally met my father, I realised that much of the confusion, anger, and emotional turmoil I felt during my teenage years was connected to not having him in my life. There’s so much I missed out on and so much he missed out on. It’s time we recognise the importance of both parents in a child’s life.” Jamie’s story is one of countless others, each echoing the importance of a father’s involvement and the long-term impact of their absence. Meyers, who also grew up without a dad, talks about her journey growing up without a dad in Daughters Without Dads: Being Emotionally or Physically Abandoned by a Father. She recounted how growing up without a father manifested itself in many ways throughout her life as she struggled with a food obsession, low self-esteem, social anxiety, and depression. A Call to Action As societies evolve, there is a pressing need for legal systems, social constructs, and individual mindsets to shift, placing equal importance on both parents. Denying a child access to their father not only strips them of shared memories, learnings, and experiences but may also deprive them of the necessary tools and emotional balance needed for adulthood. Affinity Health aims to shed light on the long-term effects of a father’s absence. “As we move forward, the focus must be on what’s best for the child’s overall well-being, ensuring they have access to the diverse, enriching experiences and lessons that both parents uniquely offer,” concludes Hewlett.

October 3, 2023

Boys and girls play differently

When observing a playground full of children, it is typical of the boys to be running and chasing each other noisily in large groups whilst the girls prefer to sit one on one, chatting and engaging in make believe games. When given the choice of toys the girls tend to gravitate towards dolls and soft toys, whereas the boys choose cars and blocks to build. Of course, there are always exceptions to the rule, but it begs the question- are boys and girls brains ‘wired’ differently?

September 29, 2023

The importance of baking

Spending time in the kitchen and baking using new recipes helps children to develop a positive connection to all different types of foods. Children will also learn basic cooking skills that they can use for the rest of their lives.

September 28, 2023

How to help your child build resilience

our children face many challenges and obstacles as they grow and are faced with what life has to offer. She adds, “Children who have been taught the skill of resilience, are able to bounce back from stress, challenges, tragedy, trauma and adversity in more effective ways than children who do not know how to be resilient. Resilient children are more adaptable, have greater courage and are more curious when facing the world around them.”

September 28, 2023

Language and successful learning – is it REALLY that important?

Have you ever gazed upon a giant oak tree? These majestic trees can grow as high as 21m and as wide as 3m! In fact, the tallest oak tree ever recorded was a whopping 44m high! Their branches extend for many metres, shading the earth from the hot sun in Summer and shedding their colourful leaves in the Autumn. It is interesting to note that the grandiose oak tree started life on earth as a tiny seed. The giant tap root system was the first part of the tree to emerge at germination – tiny at first, but continually expanding. It is from this giant tap root system that the magnificent oak tree receives all the water and nutrients that it needs to grow and develop to its full potential!

September 27, 2023

Encourage your children to be physically active

Let’s face it, growing up today is a completely different ball game to when you were young. It doesn’t matter if you’re in your late 20s or 30s and coming to grips with parenthood for the first time, or if you’re north of 50 and are a veteran of raising children, the fact remains. Kids today are living in a world wholly different to the one we developed in.

September 27, 2023

Getting the best from your child

Helping shape your children’s behaviour and assisting them to be the best version of themselves, is a key part of being a parent. It can be difficult as well as rewarding. Here is some things to consider:

September 26, 2023

Helping your child deal with common childhood fears

Encountering strangers, seeing a big dog for the first time or starting school are all situations which can induce fearful responses in children. Childhood fears and anxiety are not only normal but they are expected for each developmental age. This is because any perceived “threat” activates a fight-or-flight response in the body, which naturally serves to protect us from any harm or danger. This article looks at common childhood fears for each developmental age and offers tips on how you can help your child manage during those times. Babies and infants (0-2 years old) Newborn babies and infants tend to prefer their primary caregivers over unfamiliar faces and voices. Children in this age group tend to often experience stranger and separation anxiety—they shy away from people who they do not know and may even show fear towards them. You can help your child deal with this by: Comforting and soothing them to show them that they are safe in that moment. Helping them get to know the person while you are there (this will take some time). Teaching them that separation from you is temporary (peek-a-boo is a great example). Saying goodbye to your child instead of getting away when they are distracted— this can lead to mistrust. Toddlers and pre-schoolers (3-6 years old) Children this age have developed a very active imagination and create different scenarios all the time in their busy little minds. They also may show signs of separation anxiety (“What happens to my mommy when she’s not with me?”) and refuse to be alone or sleep alone. Toddlers also worry about the dark, bad dreams, monsters and ghosts, loud noises, bad guys and bugs or animals. Children this age also struggle when there are sudden and disruptive changes to their routine. You can help your child cope by: Listening to what they are scared of and helping them put their fear into words or through drawing. Helping your child face their fears (e.g., shop for a nightlight together or make a bottle of “monster spray”). Reassuring your child of real-life facts (e.g., there are policemen who protect us from bad guys). Positively reinforcing the bravery that they manage to show. Middle childhood (6-9 years old) School-going children often worry about this new experience—“What will it be like?”. For the first time they are put into a situation where they will have to navigate new experiences without you by their side. They are exposed to the “bigger, real” world and may worry about their teachers, them getting sick or hurt or traumatic situations they hear about. You can help your child cope by: Encouraging your child to talk about what they are thinking or feeling. Playing it out with them or reading stories with themes of risk and fear to normalise their feelings. Watching your child grow is often filled with moments of joy and celebration. Usually parents focus on physical milestones, such as rolling over, crawling and using the potty independently, which are important indicators of development. However, developing these abilities can also come with psycho-social and emotional challenges for children. child development By Reabetsoe Buys 44 Showing your child that they have the capacity to cope (by using examples of when they have shown this). Reassuring them to talk to a teacher if anything bothers them while they are at school. Pre-teens (10-12 years old) While children this age have pretty much figured out that monsters aren’t real, they tend to worry about things which can happen in real life. This includes being in danger, being caught in natural disasters or something bad happening to their parents. They may also worry about their school performance, fitting in with friends and their physical appearance. You can help your child cope by: Gathering facts with them—they love to learn! (e.g., the prevalence of natural disasters in the area you live). Helping them prepare for school-related things such as tests, presentations and performances. Being aware of what they are watching and listening to—is it appropriate? What is it exposing them to? Encouraging them to externalise their thoughts and feelings through writing, music or movement. Adolescence (13 years old+) Typically, teenagers become more peer-oriented. Therefore their concerns tend to be around peer perceptions, as well as their relationships with friends and romantic interests. They may also start to worry about “growing up”, global issues, their health and well-being, and their life purpose as an adult. You can help your child cope by: Encouraging them to talk about the challenges they are anticipating. Offering them the space to process their own thoughts and feelings (e.g., through journalling or art). Advising them that if they cannot talk to you about certain things, they should have a healthy network of people who they can talk to. Reinforcing positive behaviour, no matter how small. While some of these moments may feel challenging and overwhelming for you as a parent, remember that being consistent and open is what will allow your child to better manage with their own thoughts and feelings. They need to feel safe enough to feel what they need to feel without having to worry about upsetting you or anyone else. If your child’s worries increase in intensity, seem out of proportion to the situation or start to significantly interfere with their habits and functioning, it may help to consult with a professional who can offer guidance and support

September 21, 2023

Four short-term tips for kids, with long-term results

Teaching kids some basic financial principles should ideally form part of their upbringing. Short-term insurance is key among them, since it provides an important safety net that helps to secure your long-term well-being. It can be difficult to give up something when you do not see an immediate benefit, making short-term insurance (and most financial-must haves, for that matter) a difficult sell. But getting kids to understand it (particularly the patience it takes to stay covered), is a lesson worth learning. Here are some tips.

September 21, 2023

Preventing Dog Bites in Children

Every 3 days a child is treated for serious dog bites. In 2020, 107 children were treated for dog bites and these children were between the ages of 5 and 12 years. During this month of April ChildSafe is encouraging all parents and dog owners to be aware of the risks involved with dog bites and to learn about ways they can protect children and their families from dog bite incidents. “Dog bites often happen during everyday activities among children and seniors,” says Yolande Baker, Executive Director, ChildSafe. “Certain situations can be more conducive to the risk of a dog bite. Protect your family and yourself by being familiar with preventive measures that will minimize the risk of a dog bite.” How can you protect your family Be cautious around strange dogs. Treat your own dog with respect. Because children are the most common victims of dog bites, parents and caregivers should: NEVER leave a baby or small child alone with a dog. Be alert for potentially dangerous situations. Teach children – including toddlers – to be careful around pets. Children must learn not to approach strange dogs or try to pet dogs through fences. Teach children to ask permission from the dog’s owner before petting the dog. What’s a dog owner to do? Carefully select your pet. Puppies should not be obtained on impulse. Make sure your pet is socialized as a young puppy, so it feels at ease around people and other animals. Do not put your dog in a position where it feels threatened or teased. Be calm. Always talk in a quiet voice or whisper, no shouting. Train your dog. Basic commands help dogs understand what is expected of them and help build a bond of trust between pets and people. Walk and exercise your dog regularly to keep it healthy and provide mental stimulation. Avoid highly excitable games like wrestling or tug of war. Use a leash in public to ensure you can control your dog. Keep your dog healthy. Have your dog vaccinated against rabies and other preventable infectious diseases. Parasite control and other health care are important because how your dog feels affect how it behaves. If you have a fenced yard, make sure your gates are secure. Neuter your pet. Approximately 92% of fatal dog attacks involved male dogs, 94 percent of which were not neutered. Dog bite emergencies If you are bitten, here is a checklist of things you should do: If the dog’s owner is present, request proof of rabies vaccination, and get the owner’s name and contact information. Clean the bite wound with soap and water as soon as possible. Consult your doctor immediately or go to the emergency room if it is after office hours. Contact the dog’s veterinarian to check vaccination records. For more information on prevention of dog bites, call ChildSafe at 021 685 5208 or please visit www.childsafe.org.za

September 20, 2023

How to Develop Early Maths Skills (Number Concept)

Learning to count from one to ten, and later to a hundred, is an important milestone in early math development. However, it is equally important for young children to learn to understand the “how many-ness” or the value that every number represents. Teachers and therapists refer to this important school readiness skill as number concept. Grade R’s typically count to a hundred, but few truly understand the quantities that different numbers describe. In other words, many children freeze when you ask: “If you have six balls and your friend has eight balls, who has more?” Children who don’t understand the value of numbers will naturally not be able to conjure up a mental image of two sets of objects (in this case, a set of six balls and a set of eight balls) and then compare the sets against each other to determine which one of the two is bigger or smaller. And, as a result, they won’t be able to add and subtract with understanding. It’s important to play games with your child on three levels if you want him to develop a clear understanding of the value of different numbers. Firstly, use body movements to demonstrate numbers. Secondly, provide many opportunities for him to use his hands to handle and count off certain numbers of objects. And thirdly, make sure to include games that encourage your child to visualize different numbers of objects in his mind’s eye. You can, for instance, teach a three-year old to do the following: To include body movements, ask him to move (e.g. clap, jump or twirl) one, two or three times. To incorporate the handling of objects using his hands, you can ask him to hand you one, two or three of something whenever the opportunity pops up. To involve the mind’s eye, you can place a pile of single Lego blocks, 2-block-towers and 3-block-towers in a bag and then take turns with your child to use your sense of touch to find one of each number without looking. Then arrange your towers from one to three. Games should naturally become more challenging as a child grows older. However, the basic prerequisite for success remains unchanged throughout the first seven years: the more concrete (hands-on and tangible) the experience, the easier it is to learn. Children progress from concrete functioning to abstract reasoning as they enter primary school. Children function on a concrete level up to Grade R (where they still need to touch and handle tangible objects to discover and understand ideas about those objects) before moving on to being able to fully grasp unseen ideas on an abstract level in Grade 1. Most importantly, they need time and playful practice or else they won’t grow into being comfortable in the world of representations and symbols. It’s crucial for every Grade R learner to reach the point (by the end of the year) where he or she is able to picture an image in the mind’s eye of a number line. After throwing two dice, he should be able to name the number shown on any one of them at first glance (without counting), before shifting his attention to the second dice to “count on”. In other words, if the dice landed on three and four, he could look at one and say, three”, before pointing to each of the dots on the second dice as he counts on: “four – five – six – seven … it’s seven!” (Alternatively, he could choose to start with four, and then continue with “five – six – seven” on the second dice.) He should be able to arrange the numbers 1 to 10 in order, with each of them in its proper place, based on the value that it represents. When you point to any number from 1 to 9 on the number line, he should be able to name the number that is “one bigger” or “one smaller”. As he enters Grade 1, he can learn to do this without looking. What can I expect from my child at every age along the way? Toddlers discover the meaning of “one and many” during the second year of life. Two-year olds usually learn to rote count to three and you can teach them to hand you either one or two toys. Three-year olds can be expected to count to five and they understand the concepts of one, two and three well enough to be able to hand you that many of an object. Well-developing four-year olds can be expected to rote count to 10 and count off any number of objects from 1 to 5. Most five-year olds can count to 20 and have a real understanding of numbers up to 10. Finally, a six-year old should be able to count to 100 (also in tens), count off any number of objects between 1 and 20 and arrange the numbers from 1 to 10 in order to build a number line. Learning to work with numbers is much like learning to speak a special kind of language. Learning the language of mathematics is largely about getting better at understanding the properties of numbers and recognizing relationships and patterns ever more quickly. Naturally, acquiring these skills takes time simply because learning a new language always involves building new brain wiring. Ultimately, you want your child to reach a point where navigating around in the world of numbers will become second nature to him – like a golfer’s swing. Any kind of math play is better than none, but if you want your child to benefit optimally, you’ll need to play as many age-appropriate games as possible at home from toddler stage, and repeat them often. This article is written by: The Practica Programme is a comprehensive research- and play-based home programme. This unique system has stood the test of time since 1993, and it comprises of a wooden box with specialized apparatus, parents’ guides, an advisory service and educational newsletters. From birth to 23 months of age, parents choose from a balanced selection of more than 1000 activities to develop the 14 fundamental skills age-appropriately. For children between 2 and 7 years, the 50 school readiness skills are divided into 6 groups and tackled systematically, year by year, with 10- to 20-minute games that can be adapted to a child’s level of functioning.

September 20, 2023

Preventing Electrical Burns

Young children can be burnt very quickly, and this often happens when an adult is present, so it is important to be alert. An electrical burn happens when a child touches or comes into contact with an electric current. The current passes through the child’s body and can damage organs and tissues. Damage can be mild or severe – and it can even cause death. Last year, the Red Cross War Memorial Children’s Hospital alone, treated 880 children for burns, the most common (733 children) was caused by hot liquids (such as hot water, drinks and food). A large number of the cases were treated for electrical burns. During the period between January and February in 2020 there were 5 cases treated for electrical burns. In 2021, this number has doubled to 10 cases. “Recently, we have been seeing far more electrical injuries than usual. This may be related to children spending more time at home due to the COVID-19 Pandemic. These injuries often involve the hands, resulting in severe injuries with permanent loss of function. Care givers need to remain vigilant at all times”, said Gary Dos Passos, Head of Burns Unit, Red Cross War Memorial Children’s Hospital. “Most burn injuries can be avoided. Most of the burns happen in the home, specifically the kitchen. A first step to preventing burns is to make sure that the home environment is safe. Children are not always able to know when something is dangerous, so parents can start by checking every room in the house for possible burn risks to children. Electric shocks from appliances and electrical outlets and cords can burn the skin and cause tissue and nerve damage”, said Yolande Baker, Executive Director of ChildSafe. Electricity can cause different types of skin burns, depending on which skin layers are affected. The terms doctors use to describe different types of burns are: Superficial – A superficial burn affects only the top layer of the skin. The skin is red, dry, and painful. When you press on the burn, it turns white. Partial-thickness – A partial-thickness burn affects the top 2 layers of the skin. The skin is red and can leak fluid or form blisters. Full-thickness – A full-thickness burn affects all the layers of the skin. The burn does not usually hurt, because the burned skin cannot feel anything. The skin can be white, grey, or black. Here are a few safety tips for parents and caregivers to keep all children safe from electrical burns. ALWAYS: Cover unused electrical outlets with safety covers. Unplug electrical cords that are not in use, keeping electrical cords, power plugs and electrical equipment away from children. Keep electrical appliances away from sinks and bathtubs. Turn off electrical equipment that is not being used. Teach children to stay away from electrical sub-stations, electrical wires ate ground level and electrical fencing. NEVER: Overload power points or run electrical wires under carpets. Use unsafe or illegal electrical connections. Allow children to play with power points or electrical equipment. Repair faulty plugs and frayed cords immediately. For more information on injury prevention, call ChildSafe at 021 685 5208 or please visit www.childsafe.org.za

September 19, 2023

DEVELOP YOUR CHILD’S READING RETENTION SKILLS

Children read a lot more than you may think. Every subject your child studies in school requires reading comprehension and retention. Whether it is math, history or science, reading retention is critical to success. Here are some ways you can help your child grow and develop solid reading-retention skills. Start Early Remember, a child’s listening skills are years ahead of their reading skills. Beginning readers can still practice comprehension and retention skills. An easy way to do this is by inserting an extra step into an already existing nightly routine: bedtime stories. As you read your child a bedtime story, take note of some key story lines or events. When the story is over, you can ask your child, “Do you remember how Sam-I-Am finally got his friend to try green eggs and ham? Did he try them in a house? Did he try them with a mouse?” Even though your child is not reading for retention at this level, he or she is still learning to comprehend and retain ideas. Practice and Improve Like any skill, reading comprehension and retention require practice. Board games offer an opportunity for children to read instructions and rules that test their retention skills in a fun way. Try to find a game that your family has never played. Read the rules first to understand how the game works. After you grasp the rules, ask your children to read them. When they’re finished, ask them to explain the rules to you before you begin. For families with more than one child, this exercise can provide a unique perspective on how each child understands what he or she has read. One child may see the game in one light, while another will view the rules completely differently. Listening to your child explain the rules will identify comprehension strengths and challenges as you learn the new rules together. After everyone understands the rules, game on! Encourage Self-Correction When your child shows signs of confusion or frustration with a homework assignment, encourage them to reread the material before explaining the problem to you. In the interest of saving time, you may lean toward explaining the problem yourself. While this may be easier, letting your child self-correct builds their problem-solving skills. Guide your young child toward understanding the problem independently. After conquering the problem on their own, your child will have more self-confidence for the next challenge and greater pride in being able to tackle the problem independently. Reading is one of the most valuable tools in your child’s academic tool belt. Understanding and retaining the material are just as critical as the skill of reading itself. Encouraging the development of this crucial skill will set the stage for a lifetime of success. The Kumon English Programme is designed to build the critical reading skills that will help your child develop a lifelong love of reading – and a solid foundation for academic success. Building strong reading comprehension from an early age will prepare your child to advance through primary school with confidence and appreciation for learning. When you enrol in the Kumon English Programme, the Kumon Instructor will assess your child’s current reading skills and introduce the appropriate level of Kumon Reading Worksheets. This provides just the right start for building comprehension and writing skills. As each worksheet is completed, you’ll see your child building a stronger vocabulary, a more thorough understanding of the proper use of grammar, and an ability to interpret content. This, together with enjoying books from the Kumon Recommended Reading List, enhances your child’s appreciation for and understanding of the English language and helps to develop a lifelong love for reading. For more information you can visit our website on kumon.co.za This article is from the KUMON NORTH AMERICA website: https://www.kumon.com/resources/develop-your-childs-reading-retention-skills-2/

September 19, 2023

Start the online adventure together with your child

UNICEF South Africa released a study that 70% of children surveyed use the Internet without parental consent. “The Disrupting Harm Study released in 2022 showed that 70% of children surveyed in South Africa use the Internet without parental consent and risky online behaviour can expose them to online violence, exploitation, and abuse. The online world is also increasingly intertwined with everyday life offline.” Having an open relationship with your child’s online behaviour has been identified as a core pillar to protecting them when they go online. As parents, we can monitor their activity, we do have eyes at the back of our heads. We can implement child-friendly browsers on our devices, and we can even set an alarm clock to stop their time online and set boundaries. All of these are great and should be done to protect your child when they go online. Thanks to many hours of global best practice research and 20 years of digital and parenting experience, this program was designed to protect their own child and others like him. Social Kids is dedicated to educating children to self-regulate, self-recognise, communicate, and educate parents on how to manage this maze of information. The parental guides have been designed in a way that makes it easy to navigate, and we’ve collated global best practices and professional advice, to give parents a concise summary of how to protect their children and keep the conversations going well into their teens. Twenty minutes a week, with your child over 5 weeks, is all it will take. If you don’t have the time Miss Nadie and Codey have dedicated jump in and out supervised online classes every day of the week, to help you out when things get busy. Can you afford not to start the conversations now, while they will still want to listen to you? Register today. https://bit.ly/3njBqid

September 18, 2023

Medicating to help with sleep – Babies & Children

As sleep consultants we come across many instances of parents medicating their children to aid sleep. Parents are often faced with this decision, desperate for the entire family to get some much-needed sleep. There are special medical cases where medication may be needed and will be prescribed by your doctor, but for the most part healthy sleep routines and habits are NOT something that should be achieved by medicating. Sleep is essentially a learned behaviour that we can teach our babies and children. What does normal sleep look like? It is important to understand what normal sleep looks like for babies and children as it gives us a better indication of what to expect and why they wake so often, even after they are no longer feeding at night. We all sleep in cycles. We move through stages of light sleep (also referred to as Rapid Eye Movement or REM) and deep sleep. For a baby, sleep cycles are around 45 minutes and it gradually gets longer as they get older. They therefore naturally have a lot more REM sleep than we do. An adult has a sleep cycle that lasts up to 1.5 hours in length. During the newborn phase babies wake in the night for nutritional purposes. Between the age of 4 – 5 months, babies can usually manage one longer sleep period at night and the need to feed gradually reduces. Unfortunately, the night waking’s do not always end when the need to feed does. Even though sleep is a natural process and is a necessity to our wellbeing, linking sleep cycles and sleeping through the night is an essential skill that babies need to be taught. Some babies manage to do so naturally, but more often they need some help to get there. Children require 11 to 12 hours of sleep a night, with age-appropriate naps during the day. There are endless health and wellness benefits of getting the sleep we need. Growing children are at a disadvantage if they do not sleep well. It has a direct influence on their health, mood, weight, concentration, stamina and learning. What influences sleep? We need to look at sleep holistically and not in isolation. Sleep is a complex function as there are so many influencing factors in our daily life. NutritionWhen Nutrition Can Influence Sleep – Good Night (goodnightbaby.co.za) EnvironmentSetting the stage for a good night’s sleep – Good Night (goodnightbaby.co.za) RoutineYour 7- to 11-month-old baby’s sleep routine – Good Night (goodnightbaby.co.za) Sleep associationsUnderstanding the sleep training Process – Good Night (goodnightbaby.co.za) Stimulation IllnessMy great sleeper is sick – Now what? – Good Night (goodnightbaby.co.za) Trying to ‘cure’ sleepless nights by looking at sleep in isolation is treating the symptoms and not the cause. By – Dr Carla Jardine – Paediatrician All parents (including Paediatricians!) have struggled through sleepless nights with their kids. Trying to get your child to sleep through the night is one of the most exhausting phases of parenting. Many parents are tempted to try medication after endless sleep deprived nights. Unfortunately, this is never a real solution. These medications may provide a brief sense of relief when your child drifts off to sleep more easily at bedtime, but prolonged use can cause side effects and do not address the core problem…only a good routine with healthy sleep habits and sleep associations can encourage children to sleep through the night! The Common Culprits Melatonin: This is a natural hormone that is produced by the pineal gland in the brain. It controls our circadian rhythm-the natural sleep-wake cycle in our brain. When it is dark, melatonin increases, and the effect is that you feel progressively more sleepy. When it is light, melatonin decreases with the opposite effect. Some insomniacs have been found to have naturally low levels of melatonin. There are also instances when the circadian rhythm (and melatonin secretion) become disturbed, such as in shift workers, long haul flights (jet lag) and in people living in countries with extremes of either daylight hours or night hours. In these instances, a melatonin supplement is appropriate. Melatonin is a synthetic hormone and has side effects such as: headache, feelings of depression, daytime sleepiness, dizziness, stomach cramps and irritability. Melatonin has not been approved for use in children but there are certain instances where it can been used “off-label”. This is mainly in children who have ADHD or Autism. In these conditions there is often a disturbance in the sleep-wake cycle and melatonin has been of benefit. Anti-Histamines: These are medications that decrease the levels of histamine in the body. They are usually used to treat allergic conditions. The first generation of anti-histamines were found to be very sedating as a side effect. This resulted in these drugs being marketed as over the counter sleep aides. This is not however the appropriate use of these drugs, and they also have many side effects: dry mouth, drowsiness, dizziness, nausea and vomiting, restlessness, headaches, moodiness, blurred vision and confusion. Codeine: This is usually the ingredient in pain medication that causes sedation. Codeine is a weak opioid. It can be a useful pain medication and is also sometimes used in cough mixtures as it also causes cough suppression. Some of the side effects of codeine are: lightheadedness, dizziness, nausea and vomiting, shortness of breath, sedation, allergic reactions, constipation, abdominal pain or rashes. All of these common “sleep aides” have many side effects and their long term use is ill advised. Some are not tested in children at all and others should not be given to children under 2 years of age. The safest thing to do is to use medications only as prescribed by a doctor and not to improvise their use according to their sedative properties. If in doubt, always get your doctors advice! How do you teach your child to sleep? Just as we help our children master the skills of walking, talking, using manners, sharing, brushing teeth, we can teach them how to sleep well by putting down good

September 14, 2023

Why is math so difficult for some kids?

Understanding cognitive skills and math. “Math!” This four-letter word is enough to give many kids a knot in the stomach, and many parents sleepless nights in anticipation of the next school report or math test coming up. When it comes to mathematics, many parents and children feel anxious and frustrated. This is especially true when a child is struggling with math, in spite of already getting help by means of tutoring, extra math classes or math programs. For many parents, and similar for their children, their math anxiety began with timed math tests in primary school. They knew the answers, but their brains froze when up when working against the clock. For others, not understanding the why behind a math formula was confusing. Unfortunately, children who experience math anxiety often grow up without ever understanding the reason for their math struggles and carry math anxiety with them for the rest of their lives. As a parent, they feel helpless when their child brings home math homework. Some may become teachers who feel powerless when their students don’t understand math or label themselves as not being a math person. Their math anxiety and frustration gets passed on to the children, and the cycle unfortunately continues. Math anxiety is very real, are extremely debilitating, and have been studied for decades. Yet it persists. But why is math so difficult for some kids?! The answer to this question usually lies within the strengths and weaknesses in our individual cognitive profiles. Each of us have strong and weaker cognitive skills – those underlying brain skills essential for learning, reading, reasoning, attention, and yes – math. And when it comes to math (and learning), having strong cognitive skills is a prerequisite for learning math. If one or a combination of skills like selective, sustained and divided attention; visual processing; visual, sequential and working memory; long term memory, deductive and inductive reasoning are weak, they must be strengthened first, before a child will be able to understand and apply math. So let’s explore the connection between cognitive skills and math. As the foundation for learning, cognitive skills are essential across any curriculum, including math What, then, are the important underlying cognitive processes that support or impair our learning of math? According to scientific and educational researchers, math skills can be grouped into the following categories: SPATIAL REPRESENTATION The relationship of math success to visual-spatial abilities is strongly supported by research, and the correlation appears to increase as the complexity of the math task increases. The important aspect of visual-spatial processing is not just remembering the shape, size, colour and number of objects, but their relationship to each other in space. It turns out that visual memory by itself (what things are) is somewhat error-prone, but spatial memory (where things are) is associated with correct answers, and is thus an important aspect of mathematical problem solving. Within visual-spatial processing, we can distinguish cognitive skills such as the following: Spatial Memory: This refers to our ability to remember where we are in space and where we are related to other objects in space. This understanding provides the foundation on which problems (changes in the space) can be solved. Visualization: Our ability to visualize a problem we need to solve or to visualize alternative solutions contributes substantially to our understanding of the problem. When we learn transformations in geometry, for example, interpreting the difference between a translation (sliding an object along a straight line), a rotation (turning an object around a point) and a reflection (mirror image) is greatly aided by our visualization skills. Directionality: The ability to distinguish between left and right, of course, is more than just about math. It comes in handy when tying shoe laces, reading a map, and in playing sport. Here’s an example of how we use directionality – imagine someone hands you a map with a route marked out on it. Do you have to keep turning the map around to figure out what direction to turn next? If so, your directionality skills are not as strong as they might be. COUNTING AND OPERATIONS When it comes to counting and numerical operations, we are again dependent for math success on some foundational cognitive skills, such as sequential processing and selective attention, and on executive functions (the directive capacities of our minds) such as Working Memory: Working Memory: Working Memory is to our ability to hold information in our minds while we manipulate it. Working memory capacity is highly correlated with reading comprehension, with math performance, and with many other academic and non-academic outcomes. Working Memory serves math processes from the very simple (for example, keeping track of which oranges in the basket we’ve counted and which we haven’t) to the most complex reasoning and mental simulations we perform when calculating statistics or contemplating string theory or manipulating derivatives in calculus. Sequential Processing: Counting is all about sequences, so once again, cognitive skills contribute crucially at even the most elementary stages of math. As we start to manipulate and calculate, the sequence of steps to solve a problem must be observed. A concrete example is the concept of order of operations and the different result that comes from (7 + 4) x 3 and from 7 + (4 x 3). Selective Attention: When we have good selective attention skills, it’s easier for us to screen out the irrelevant parts of a complex problem and isolate the relevant facts that we need to concentrate on. For example – if Susan, who is wearing a red dress, is 2 years older than Ben, who is wearing a blue shirt and jeans and just celebrated his 12th birthday, we don’t need to know the colour of their clothes to determine how hold Susan is. LOGICAL PROBLEM SOLVING Undoubtedly, math is problem-solving. There are of course other types of problem-solving, but problems with numbers almost always call for mathematical thinking and logic to be applied. Above, we have already highlighted some of the cognitive skills we use for problem-solving,

September 14, 2023

Imposing Expectations On Your Children

Many of my clients come to me complaining that their children simply do not do what they’re told, are unmanageable, and are following the ‘wrong’ path in life. What this tells me is a lot about the parent, and very little indeed about the child. We all give away through they way that we speak and the things that we focus on what is important to us. But how often do we stop to find out what is important to someone else, particularly with our children. As much as we have hopes and desires for our kids, they have these for themselves too. What we tend to do is praise and emphasise those things that they love that fit in with our own priorities for them and ignore or ridicule those that are outside of our own value system. In doing so we impose our own set of values and dreams onto our children and then wonder why they eventually rebel and become totally in-compliant. Most parents, if they took the time and care to notice, would find it easy to tell you what is important to their kids, and yet they place very little importance on this themselves. When we stop to respect our children as real, complete human beings as they are, we enter a whole new world of relationship with them. Think about it – you wouldn’t tell your friends what job they should do or who they should be friends with or what they should be eating for dinner, right? Understanding your children’s dreams, goals and priorities instead of ignoring them can actually make your parenting journey much easier. Whatever it is that you want them to do, you simply find a way to link it to what is already important to them. For example if you want your child to bath and their highest priority is to play, then instead of saying “get in the bath now”, say “it’s time to go and play in the bath – which toys would you like to bring?” Or, for example, if you want your child to eat vegetables and their highest priority is dinosaurs, then call the broccoli “dinosaur trees” or talk about which dinosaurs would have eaten each part of the meal that is currently on their plate. If you want your soccer star to focus more on maths, point out how by learning maths he will have an advantage over the other players by understanding how to score goals by focusing on the angle between himself, the ball and the net. It may take a bit of time and practice, but I guarantee that linking what your child loves to everything they need to do makes parenting easier in the long run. Children feel heard and understood and they see that you are respecting what is important to them. They see the connections between what you want them to do and what they want for themselves instead of seeing your view as an imposition. I believe that every human being, regardless of their age, should have their values and dreams respected. The sooner that parents and teachers stop imposing their views onto the children in their care and instead link their values to those of the kids, the sooner we’ll find happy children, living their dreams AND complying with their caregivers.

September 13, 2023

Are you functioning on autopilot?

They say half of the time we function on autopilot whilst 90% of our purchasing decisions are done on autopilot. In other words we are not consciously thinking about what we are doing or why we are doing those things. They have become habitual. For example: Think about when you brush your teeth or your morning routine each day when you wake up. The route you drive to or from home and work each day. Have there been times when you can’t remember how you got to a place or walked into a room and forgot what you were going to do? This is because we are not consciously thinking about our actions and thoughts – we are on autopilot. This happens daily with tasks we perform, the way we interact with others, our reactions, our behaviours, things we hold onto from the past and even some of our beliefs. It has become so ingrained in us over the years that we have not stopped to consider whether those things are still relevant, serve us positively or whether there is possibly something new or different we could consider instead. We lose out on so much as we are unaware of what is going on around us. We miss the signs and messages – both verbal and non-verbal. A wounded glance, reactive tone of voice, hurt eyes, dejected or closed off body language. We even miss the beauty in everything due to our presence being elsewhere instead of enjoying the moment for what it is – the here and now. Living mindfully present is important to the quality of the lives we live. Being mindful of our own thoughts, actions and behaviours and the impact they have on others around us. Being fully present in the moment and giving others our undivided attention and efforts is a gift. So how do we become more mindful? It’s a daily practice that takes time to master and should be viewed as learning a new skill just the same as learning to read or write. It starts with becoming aware of our own ‘self’ – how we talk to ourselves, the words we use, the language we speak. Often we are our own worst critic and berate ourselves harshly. The more we tell ourselves stories, the stronger they become until they take on a life of their own and become the path we live by. When our self awareness grows, we become aware of our own thoughts and behaviours as well as the impact we are having on others and they are having on us. In other words we are fully present in the moment and aware of what we are doing as well as of what is happening around us. We can sense when we are not being authentic and sincere just as much as we can sense when others are not. Yet often we choose to ignore this. We know when we are being true to ourselves and living our truth vs. compromising our own values and personal boundaries and the consequences that come with this. Some like to mediate, others like to unwind in the mountains or near the sea whilst some like to partake in an activity – each with the purpose of connecting us to ourselves, feeding our soul and feeling alive, like we have a purpose. It does not matter what you do so long as you do it. With a heightened sense of awareness, we are able to be more creative, positive, solution oriented, peace loving and kind for the benefit of all and mankind. Reflection time: Can you think of words or phrases you often use when speaking to or about yourself? Are they positive and uplifting or critical and faultfinding? Can you remember a situation where you may not have been fully present and aware of your actions? If you think back to that time now, can you see the different ways your actions may have been interpreted by others? Would your actions have a positive or negative impact on others? Is there one thing you can start doing differently today to raise your levels of self awareness? Look for the good and positive in everyone and every situation because it is there if you dare to try. The intention we set for ourselves is the intention by which we live and treat others. Make yours a positive and uplifting one.

September 13, 2023

UNILEVER SA MAKES HYGIENE EDUCATION FUN AND EASY FOR SA CHILDREN WITH THE LAUNCH OF HYGIENE HEROES DIGITAL PLATFORM

Following on from its successful National Schools Hygiene Programme in partnership with the Department of Basic Education, Unilever South Africa has launched Hygiene Heroes- an online platform that teaches children handwashing, toilet hygiene and oral care through interactive activities and games. No child should ever have to miss school due to preventable illnesses, but this is often the case with South Africa’s learners. That’s why Unilever South Africa, in a bid to improve children’s hygiene habits and keep them safer from germs at home and at school, has just launched a free interactive digital platform called Hygiene Heroes. Hygiene Heroes helps children learn all about handwashing, toilet hygiene and oral hygiene through animated videos, quizzes, and interactive games. The journey begins with animated videos where colourful characters teach practical hygiene habits that children can easily understand. The real fun kicks off with the germ dodging game, where kids can compete against their friends and climb the leader board. At the end, there are interactive quizzes that allow them to test their knowledge. Parents, guardians, and caregivers with internet access can sign up for free to the platform, play the games with their children and witness as they learn good hygiene habits and bring them into their homes and schools. Hygiene Heroes will give parents and guardians an opportunity to spend quality time with their children engaged in a fun, learning activity that encourages good hygiene habits that keep the whole family healthier so they can continue to go about their daily lives without the stress and financial strain of family illness. When parents sign up to the platform, their children will join over 6.2 million learners who have already gained the same hygiene education through the National Schools Hygiene Programme – presented by Unilever SA and the Department of Basic Education. Unilever’s Purpose Strategy and Partnerships Lead, Queen Mgobhozi said; “The launch of Hygiene Heroes is particularly vital in this post pandemic era where we have seen a dip in awareness about good hygiene habits due to the lessened risk of contracting Covid 19; while the risk of other deadly infectious diseases that keep children from crucial learning remains. We believe that the launch of this fun learning platform can contribute to filling this gap by ensuring continual reinforcement of good hygiene habits using an always on educational and interactive digital platform.” Issues such as post-Covid hygiene fatigue and lack of access to sanitation and water continue to affect the health and wellbeing of South Africa’s children, which often translates into school absenteeism. By teaching kids basic hygiene from a young age, we can reinforce these important lessons early on and equip them with vital knowledge to protect themselves from illness-causing germs. The World Health Organisation identifies invested stakeholder collaboration such as the Unilever and Department of Basic Education’s National Schools Hygiene Programme partnership, which promotes behaviour change as a solution to preventing illness caused by germs and keeping children in school, as vital to ensuring continued access to education and optimal health. Parents, guardians, caregivers, and media can log on to Hygiene Heroes here: Register | Unilever Schools Programme Stand a chance to win exciting giveaways by visiting Unilever South Africa Homepage | Unilever and following @unileversa on Instagram, @UnileverSA on Twitter and Unilever Food Solutions SA on Facebook.

September 13, 2023

Hygiene Habits Made Fun with Hygiene Heroes!

What is Hygiene Heroes? No child should miss school over an illness that’s easily preventable, but unfortunately, that’s something that happens every day. Practicing good hygiene habits can ensure kids stay healthier and don’t miss out on their education. Teaching kids basic hygiene lessons is simple and fun with Hygiene Heroes! This free platform, presented by Unilever and the Dept. of Basic Education, helps children learn all about handwashing, toilet hygiene and oral care through animated videos, quizzes and interactive games. Fighting Germs the Fun Way Teach your little ones’ hygiene habits the fun way through our collection of games and activities! Their journey starts with our animated videos – where colourful characters teach practical hygiene habits that kids can easily understand. Afterwards, the Hygiene Heroes platform offers quick quizzes to test their knowledge. The real fun begins with the germ dodging game. To play, simply use the up and down arrows to collect virtual coins and avoid bumping into the evil germs that cause illnesses! As your kids keep playing and improve their skills, their scores will climb, allowing them to compete with their friends. Watch your kids climb the leader board as they learn hygiene habits. Then watch them bring those habits home and school, where they’ll fight real germs and avoid real illnesses! Win with Hygiene Heroes! Enjoying Hygiene Heroes? Show us how your child is doing! Visit Hygiene Heroes Here Share a photo of your child or children playing #HygieneHeroes & tag @unileversa for your chance to WIN R10 000 cash PLUS your share of: Unilever Product Hampers worth R1000 Grocery Vouchers worth R500 1G Data bundles

September 12, 2023

Chores And Responsibilities- Getting Your Kids To Clean

Getting children to do their chores is not about making our lives easier but it is about encouraging cooperation and responsibility. Our children were given tasks to do from when they were little. It started off with putting their toys away after playing and taking their plates and cups to the kitchen. They now make the beds, keep their rooms tidy and ensure that their clothes and bags are ready for school the next day. How do you get your children to do their part though, without putting up a fight? Here are some tips for getting your kids involved: Start early. Parents should try giving their children household responsibilities when they are young. They can begin to help you with small chores like keeping their books tidy on the shelf or putting their dirty clothes in the laundry basket. Most toddlers love to help their parents. Parents should take advantage of this desire and give their children small and simple tasks. As children get older they should then be given more challenging tasks. Demonstrate. Children need to know exactly what’s expected of them. Therefore, it is a good idea for parents to make sure their children know exactly what their chores are. Whenever you’re introducing a new task, make sure you teach your kids how to do it. Make sure you demonstrate the skills you want your children to learn from packing the dishwasher to making their beds. Set up a reward chart. If parents have trouble getting their children to do their chores, a reward system can be set up to encourage cooperation. A chart can be placed in a prominent location in the home. Parents can then put a sticker on the chart for each completed chore. You can then both decide what reward they will get for doing the chores properly over a set period. Don’t repeatedly remind or nag. Parents should try to avoid falling into the trap of continually reminding and/or nagging their children to complete their chores. Instead, parents should make sure that their children are given the sole responsibility for the completion of their chores. If a child forgets or refuses to do a chore, parents should say nothing and simply apply the consequences. Don’t do the chore for your child. If parents get frustrated and give in and do their children’s chores, children learn a number of things. First of all, children learn that their parents don’t mean what they say and will not follow through. Secondly, children learn that if they hold out long enough someone will do their chores for them. Parents should simply apply whatever consequences you have decided on until the child learns to complete the task. Provide lots of praise. Parents should always provide lots of praise and encouragement when their children make an effort to do their chores. Parents should keep praising, even after their children have been consistently doing a chore well. Offer choices. Allow your kids to have a say in the tasks they’ll be responsible for. One way to do this is to make a list all of the jobs that need to be completed, and allow each child to choose two or three age-appropriate tasks. Then, on “chore day,” you can each pick one or two cards and complete those jobs. Working together, you’ll have these tasks done in no time! Don’t expect perfection. Each job should be done to the best of the child’s abilities. That doesn’t mean it will be done the way mom would do it. Remember, the goal is to get them to participate. Help them feel good about their efforts. Gradually Increase Your Kids’ Responsibilities. As your children become more skilled in completing chores around the house, mix it up by introducing new tasks. For example, once your preteen has mastered packing the dishwasher, consider whether they are ready to unpack the dishes once washed and put them away. Teaching kids about chores not only helps them in their home life, but it will also bring about positive aspects in school as well. The skills and values learned by doing chores will benefit children throughout their lives. The results may not initially be perfect but over time, you’ll begin to see that your kids are getting better and better at the skills you’re teaching them.

September 12, 2023

How to improve your Child’s Decision-Making skills

What is Decision-Making? Decision making is an invaluable skill, especially when your children start to make independent choices. It is an ability that benefits throughout their lives. More often, it will be their independent choices which will determine the course of their lives. Decision-making is about assessing all the options available, being aware of the situation within and around you. Thus, for children to become good at decision-making, they need to learn how to assess the possibilities, be self-aware about what they need, and understand the situation they are in. For many people, both young and adults making a decision is one of the hardest and complicated things in life, as it involves numerous aspects for consideration. Many times due to a lack of self-awareness, people remain confused throughout their lives and often end up making poor choices. Considering the dynamic environment of the 21st Century and exposure to technology from an early age, thus instilling the quality of making good decisions among children is imperative. Every small or big decision an individual makes has the potential to change his/her life. “Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent, and committed decision. “- Tony Robbins (American Author, Coach, Speaker) What are the essential skills for effective decision-making? The ability to make sound decisions requires a wide variety of skills. Below are the skills that are crucial to make your child an effective Decision-maker: Critical Thinking: Critical thinking is the ability to think judiciously and reasonably without being affected by anything or anyone. It is an art of analyzing something with an unbiased mindset. Effective decision-making requires critical thinking over all the possible alternatives. Individuals need to analyze the cause and effect relationship to ensure that the selected alternative has minimum or no negative impacts. Critical Thinking will enable your child to make an informed decision. Problem-Solving: Problem-solving is the ability to solve problems effectively. Problem-solving skills are the basis for improvement and innovation. Children need to incorporate problem-solving skills to become a good decision-maker. Problem solving also requires critical thinking, but in addition, it is also about understanding the problem. As often, the solution is hidden within the problem itself. Creativity: Creativity is all about mixing originality with uniqueness. Creative Thinking helps us to see things from a different perspective. Sometimes, decisions are to be made regarding such aspects where there is no way to know which possibility or decision is the right one. Creativity will enable your child to make sound decisions in unforeseen situations. When the logical or traditional aspects do not make sense, it is the creativity of a person that comes into play. It can be an out-of-the-box idea or an unorthodox approach to seeing things from a different perspective. “Truly successful decision-making relies on a balance between deliberate and instinctive thinking.”- Malcolm Gladwell Logical Reasoning: Reasoning is concerned with analyzing a problem in a logical manner to draw conclusions. It helps to identify the reason behind anything and approach towards our assessment of things logically. Sound decisions are an outcome of logical reasoning. Reasoning will help your child to assess the pros and cons of the decision they intend to make. Thinking logically and reasonably ensures that foolish options are set aside straightaway during the decision-making process. Emotional Intelligence: Emotional Intelligence is the ability to understand and manage our emotions and the ability to understand and influence others’ emotions. Life is uncertain and unpredictable. There are times when we have to make hard decisions. This is when emotional Intelligence plays its role. Emotional Intelligence will help your children to manage their sentiments while making harsh decisions. Time Management: Time management is the ability to prioritize activities based on the available time. There are times when the decision is required to be taken time bound as well. In such a situation, the assessment of possible options, understanding of the situation, etc. is to be done within that time frame. When a child knows how to manage his/her time, the ability to take time-bound decisions improves. How can you improve Decision-making skills? Decision-making is one of the most significant and beneficial life skills in the 21st Century. Acquiring Decision-making skills also contributes to improving a child’s leadership ability. Decisions can transform our lives beyond imagination. Therefore, you must help your child in developing decision-making skills. Encourage Decision Making: During the day to day life, you can get multiple situations when you can allow your child to make a decision. The more opportunity a child will get to make decisions; the more his/her decision-making skills will improve. Ask Questions: Talk to your children about their thought process behind making a decision. See how they are evaluating various possibilities, in case you see one or more possibility was ignored, then ask them ‘what if this happened?’ Pay attention to how they respond and guide them in those aspects where there is a need for improvement. Discuss Your Process of Decision Making: Share with your children an incident of your life where you had to make a tough decision. Explain to them what was going on in your mind, what were the different aspects you took into consideration, etc. This way, they would feel more comfortable asking you for guidance for any of their decision. Involvement: If a certain situation in your house requires a decision to be made, make your children part of the discussion. The more involved they become, the more connected they would feel with the situation, putting them in a mindset of thinking and assessing the situation. More importantly, they would also learn from you, and they might even give you some valuable points to consider. “Unnecessary fear of a bad decision is a major stumbling block to good decisions.” – Jun Camp The world needs proficient Decision-makers for a bright future. Developing this skill within a child from an early age is crucial for the overall development. Creating a better generation then themselves is a responsibility of each generation. And this responsibility starts with parents itself.

September 11, 2023

Bedtime – How much sleep should your child be getting?

More and more research points towards the importance of sleep for children’s health, academic performance, and behaviour. Although this may seem apparent, many of us actually do not allow our children to get the critical sleep they need to develop and function properly. It’s certainly not something we do on purpose. But with parents working long hours, packed school schedules, after-school activities, and other lifestyle factors, naps are missed, bedtimes are pushed back, mornings start earlier and nights may be anything but peaceful. Missing naps or going to bed a little late may not seem like a big deal, but it all adds up, with consequences that may last a lifetime. “Sleep is the power source that keeps your mind alert and calm. It recharges your brain’s battery, increasing one’s brainpower and attention span, as well as allowing you to be physically relaxed and mentally alert at the same time. Then and only then can you function at your personal best.” as stated by Paediatrician Marc Weissbluth. Signs of sleep-related problems may show up in a number of ways with kids, including daytime sleepiness, weakened immune systems, inattention, poor concentration, moodiness, behavioural problems, weight gain, irregular social skills and poor academic performance. According to Dr Avi Sadeh, a loss of one hour of sleep is equivalent to the loss of two years of cognitive maturation and development. To understand the critical nature of sleep to our children’s growth and development, let’s take a look at the essentials needed for healthy sleep and what interventions we can put in place in our homes to encourage better sleep routines. Essentials of Healthy Sleep Healthy sleep allows for optimal alertness when we are awake. This is the state in which we are most receptive to and interactive with our environment – when our attention span is at its best and the most learning can occur. You can see this in a child who is calm and attentive, pleasant, wide eyed, absorbing everything, and socially interacts with ease. Altered states of alertness interfere with a child’s learning and behaviour. Healthy sleep thus requires: Sufficient amounts of sleep to grow, develop, and function optimally. How much is right for your child varies by age. Uninterrupted (good quality) sleep allows good growth and development of the body’s nervous system. The proper number of age-appropriate naps optimize alertness, learning and development. Naps serve a different purpose to that of night time sleep, but are as important. Thus timing is essential, making sure they are planned and in sync with your child’s natural biological rhythms. A sleep schedule that is in sync with the child’s natural biological rhythms(internal clock or circadian rhythm). This allows for effective restoration and long term memory development, but being out of sync can lead to difficulty falling asleep or simply staying awake. Children then become overly tired and stressed. So it is important your child’s sleep needs are met and that you adjust your schedule to be in sync with theirs. If, over time, any of these essentials are not optimal, symptoms of sleep deprivation and fatigue may occur. How can we help our kids get the proper amount of sleep? Limit bedtime activities- a routine of relaxing activities like reading or listening to classical music can help most children sleep better. Make sure all electronics are removed to avoid further stimulation. Establish a sleep schedule- similar to routine activities, experts recommend consistent times to go to sleep and wake, ideally not differing much during the week or on weekends. Create a Conducive Environment- children will sleep faster and deeper when the room is dark, quiet and cool. Promote Regular Exercise- A minimum of 60 minutes of physical activity for children each day can yield many benefits, including better sleep. Limit Caffeine- it’s advisable to limit all forms of caffeine, particularly late in the day, which includes tea, soda and chocolate. Avoid late afternoon or Early Evening naps- later naps can result in later bedtimes and less critical sleep for older children. As parents, it is our responsibility to be sensitive to and protect our children’s sleep, just as we do their safety. We are primarily responsible for their sleep habits so it is important to start healthy ones early; it is much easier to instil good habits than correct bad ones. Thus infuse the importance of sleep with daily attention to it and you will likely have a happier, self-assured, less demanding, and more sociable child. And who knows, you might just get some more sleep yourself! Written By: Danielle Forsyth (Trinityhouse Heritage Hill, Educational Psychologist)

September 11, 2023

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