Child - Parenting Hub

Advice from the experts

Fostering Independence in Young Children: Building Confidence from an Early Age

Fostering independence in young children helps them build self-confidence, develop problem-solving skills, and prepare for a more autonomous future. By giving them room to make choices and take on age-appropriate responsibilities, parents can empower children to feel capable and ready to tackle life’s challenges. Here’s a guide to nurturing independence in your child while keeping their development needs in mind. 1. Encourage Choice-Making Giving young children options allows them to feel involved and learn the consequences of their decisions. Start with simple choices: By making small decisions, children learn confidence in expressing preferences and build a sense of agency in their daily lives. 2. Teach Practical Skills Young children often enjoy tasks that adults take for granted. Introducing them to simple, hands-on skills builds self-reliance: Completing these tasks builds their competence and makes them feel like a valuable part of the family. 3. Model Problem-Solving Techniques Children learn by observing, so model a calm and solution-oriented approach when challenges arise: Encouraging independent problem-solving teaches kids to think critically and builds their ability to handle future challenges. 4. Set Up an Environment for Independence Arrange the home to make it easy for young children to access the things they need: Creating a child-friendly environment allows them to manage their belongings and daily routines. 5. Encourage Social Independence Encouraging positive social skills can help children become more independent in group settings: Social independence equips children with the skills they need to interact confidently with others. 6. Let Them Make Mistakes Allowing children to make mistakes is essential for building resilience. Resist the urge to jump in and “fix” everything: This approach teaches children that mistakes are a natural part of learning and nothing to fear. 7. Celebrate Progress and Effort Acknowledging your child’s achievements—big or small—encourages them to keep trying: Encouraging their progress helps children feel proud and independent without relying on external rewards. Conclusion Fostering independence in young children equips them with the confidence and life skills they need as they grow. By guiding them through choice-making, practical skills, problem-solving, and social interactions, parents create a supportive environment where children can thrive. Empowering kids from an early age doesn’t mean leaving them to figure things out alone; it’s about giving them the tools to explore, make decisions, and build resilience with gentle guidance.

November 21, 2024

Building Healthy Sleep Habits for Kids of All Ages

Quality sleep is essential for children’s growth, development, and emotional well-being. However, getting kids to establish healthy sleep routines can sometimes be challenging, especially with varying needs at different ages. This guide provides practical tips to create age-appropriate sleep habits that help children thrive. Why Sleep is Important for Children Sleep Recommendations by Age The amount of sleep required varies by age: Healthy Sleep Tips for All Ages 1. Create a Consistent Sleep Routine 2. Foster a Comfortable Sleep Environment 3. Age-Specific Strategies 4. Monitor Nutrition and Activity How Parents Can Support Better Sleep When to Seek Help If your child experiences frequent sleep disruptions, insomnia, or signs of sleep disorders (like snoring or night terrors), consider consulting a paediatrician or sleep specialist. Conclusion Healthy sleep habits are essential for children’s physical, emotional, and cognitive well-being. By implementing consistent routines and age-appropriate strategies, parents can support their children’s sleep and overall development. Prioritising good sleep practices now will establish lifelong habits that benefit kids well into adulthood.

November 14, 2024

Making Chores Fun: How to Get Your Kids Involved Without the Struggle

Do your kids groan and complain about helping around the house or yard? Does it feel like an uphill battle to get them to tackle even the smallest tasks? And when you do assign a chore, do they put it off until you’re frustrated and ready to hand out punishments? If this sounds all too familiar, I’d love to share some advice. Think back to your own childhood—did you enjoy doing chores? Probably not! Many of us grew up with parents who took a more authoritarian approach, making sure we did what we were told. Today, many parents, like myself, are using a more democratic approach. When you take fear out of parenting, you allow space for opinions, emotions, and yes, even resistance, which can slow things down. So, how do you get kids to actually do their chores? If you’re practicing a more respectful and democratic parenting style like I am, the key is to extend that approach to chores as well. This involves setting expectations ahead of time, getting input from your kids, and creating agreements—both verbal and written. And when they don’t meet those agreements, using respect to guide them back on track. At your next weekly or bimonthly family meeting, start by making a list of chores the adults will handle, then ask the kids to help come up with a list of all the other tasks that need to be done. Listen to their suggestions on how and when they’ll get the work done. Create a schedule that everyone agrees to, and consider getting everyone to sign it. If one of your kids is especially resistant, it’s okay to table that discussion until the next meeting. Chores work best when there’s unanimous agreement from everyone. It’s also crucial that each chore has a specific deadline and clear expectations of what “done” looks like. I can’t stress enough how important it is to be specific when assigning tasks. And remember, you don’t truly have an agreement with your child until they verbally confirm the entire arrangement! If a chore isn’t completed, resist the urge to nag, remind, or scold. Instead, stay silent. Find your child, gently guide them with a touch on the back, and lead them to the chore that needs to be done. If they push back, it’s a sign that there may be a bigger issue in your relationship to address before this follow-up method can be effective. Lastly, I’m often asked what age is appropriate for kids to start helping with chores. In my experience, even preschoolers can take on small tasks, as long as they’re suited to their age and ability. For younger children, keep chores simple, fun, and achievable. And of course, be generous with praise and excitement when they successfully complete them.

November 12, 2024

Encouraging Mindfulness in Young Children

Helping young children navigate their emotions, improve focus, and reduce stress can be achieved through simple and engaging techniques—mindfulness. Dibber International Preschools highlights the many benefits of introducing mindfulness practices to children from an early age, as it is a powerful tool for enhancing their overall well-being and promoting emotional balance. “Mindfulness for young children is about teaching them to be fully present, to notice their thoughts, feelings, and experiences without judgment. It helps them build emotional resilience and mental clarity, which are crucial in their development,” explains Ursula Assis, Country Director of Dibber International Preschools. “By starting mindfulness practices early, we are giving children the tools to manage their emotions in healthy ways.” Mindfulness is naturally suited to young children, as they often live in the present. Simple practices like mindful breathing exercises, noticing sensations, or reflecting on experiences make mindfulness fun and relatable. For example, parents and educators can ask children questions like, “How did it feel when you bit into that apple?” or “What did you notice while playing outside?” These questions help children become aware of their emotions and surroundings, fostering emotional intelligence and self-awareness. Key Benefits of Mindfulness for Young Children: “Mindfulness is not just about quiet moments. It’s about giving children lifelong tools to manage their emotions, foster resilience, and thrive in their environment. A mindful child today becomes a balanced and thriving individual tomorrow,” concludes Assis.

November 12, 2024

Teaching Empathy: Helping Your Child Understand and Respect Others

In a world that grows more interconnected every day, raising empathetic children has become essential. Empathy—the ability to understand and share the feelings of others—goes beyond kindness; it helps children build meaningful relationships, resolve conflicts, and develop emotional intelligence. Teaching empathy isn’t a one-time lesson; it’s a process that shapes how children relate to others throughout their lives. In this article, we explore practical ways to nurture empathy in children and guide them toward becoming thoughtful and compassionate individuals. What Is Empathy? Empathy is the ability to step into another person’s shoes and see the world from their perspective. It involves recognising and understanding the emotions of others, whether they are happy, sad, frustrated, or excited. There are two main types of empathy: Cognitive Empathy: Understanding someone else’s thoughts and feelings. Emotional Empathy: Feeling what another person feels, almost as if their emotions were your own. Children who develop both forms of empathy grow to be more compassionate, respectful, and capable of navigating social interactions. Why Is Teaching Empathy Important? Teaching empathy helps children: Build stronger friendships by understanding the feelings and perspectives of others. Develop conflict resolution skills by learning how to compromise and solve problems with kindness. Become more resilient by connecting with others in times of difficulty. Contribute positively to their communities, fostering inclusivity and respect. Practical Tips for Teaching Empathy 1. Model Empathy in Everyday Life Children learn by example. When parents show empathy—whether by listening attentively, offering comfort, or respecting others’ opinions—children internalise those behaviours. Use opportunities to discuss how your actions reflect kindness, such as, “I helped Mrs. Smith with her groceries because she looked like she needed a hand.” 2. Encourage Open Conversations About Emotions Help your child understand their emotions by naming and discussing them. For example, if your child is frustrated about losing a game, say, “It sounds like you’re feeling frustrated because you really wanted to win.” By validating their feelings, you teach them to acknowledge emotions in themselves and others. 3. Read Stories That Highlight Empathy Books are an excellent way to introduce children to different perspectives. Stories about characters facing challenges or learning to care for others can spark meaningful discussions. After reading, ask questions like, “How do you think the character felt?” or “What would you have done in that situation?” 4. Encourage Acts of Kindness Small acts of kindness help children practice empathy in action. Encourage them to notice when someone might need help—whether it’s a friend who looks sad or a sibling struggling with homework. Participating in community activities, like volunteering, can also deepen their understanding of others’ experiences. 5. Teach Active Listening Skills Active listening involves more than just hearing words; it requires paying attention to body language, tone of voice, and emotions. Teach your child to listen without interrupting, and when someone shares a problem, ask them to respond with understanding, such as, “That sounds hard. I’m sorry you’re feeling that way.” 6. Use Role-Playing to Build Empathy Role-playing different scenarios can help children imagine how others feel in various situations. For example, act out a scene where one friend accidentally hurts another’s feelings, and discuss what each character might feel. Then brainstorm ways to respond with empathy and kindness. 7. Foster Gratitude and Perspective-Taking Encourage your child to reflect on what they’re grateful for and compare it with the experiences of others. This helps them recognise that not everyone has the same privileges and can nurture empathy for people facing challenges. Activities like writing thank-you notes or journaling can also promote gratitude and empathy. When Children Struggle with Empathy It’s normal for children to have difficulty with empathy at times, especially if they are still learning to manage their own emotions. If your child struggles to see things from another’s perspective, be patient. Use these moments as teaching opportunities to gently guide them toward understanding how their actions impact others. The Long-Term Benefits of Raising Empathetic Children Children who learn empathy grow into adults with strong interpersonal skills, emotional intelligence, and a deeper sense of social responsibility. They are better equipped to handle conflicts, build meaningful relationships, and contribute positively to society. In the long run, empathetic individuals help create more inclusive and understanding communities. Conclusion: Empathy as a Lifelong Skill Teaching empathy is one of the most valuable gifts you can give your child. It lays the foundation for respectful relationships, emotional resilience, and social harmony. As parents, our role is to model empathy, encourage open conversations, and create opportunities for children to practice kindness. With patience and practice, empathy becomes a natural part of who they are—shaping not only their lives but also the lives of those around them. By nurturing empathy in children, we pave the way for a future filled with understanding, compassion, and mutual respect—one kind interaction at a time.

November 11, 2024

Managing Sibling Rivalry: Strategies to Encourage Cooperation at Home

Sibling rivalry is a natural part of family life, but without proper management, it can become a source of ongoing conflict and tension. Disagreements among siblings are normal and even healthy, as they teach children about sharing, conflict resolution, and emotional regulation. However, it’s important to guide these interactions in positive ways that encourage cooperation and mutual respect. With the right strategies, parents can help turn rivalry into opportunities for personal growth and stronger sibling relationships. Understanding the Root of Sibling Rivalry Sibling rivalry often stems from competing for parental attention, differences in personalities, or feelings of jealousy and insecurity. Children may feel that their sibling receives more praise, privileges, or affection, leading to resentment. Understanding these root causes allows parents to address underlying issues before conflicts escalate. Effective Strategies to Encourage Cooperation Tip: Focus on each child’s unique strengths by celebrating their individual achievements. Example: Use phrases like, “What solution do you both think is fair?” or “How can we solve this together?” Family Rule Idea: “We use kind words with each other, even when we disagree.” Fun Idea: Introduce a “sibling teamwork jar,” adding a token each time they cooperate. When the jar is full, celebrate with a special treat or outing. Quality Time Idea: Schedule “date days” with each child to do an activity they enjoy. Example: “I love how you shared your toys with your sister today. That was very kind!” Conversation Starter: “How do you think your brother felt when you took his toy without asking?” Activity Idea: Rotate responsibility for planning a family day, allowing each child to contribute their ideas. Conclusion: Turning Rivalry into Lifelong Friendship Managing sibling rivalry is an ongoing process that requires patience, empathy, and consistency. By focusing on cooperation, teaching conflict resolution, and fostering positive sibling experiences, parents can help their children build strong, supportive relationships. These early lessons in empathy, teamwork, and respect will not only benefit them at home but also prepare them for healthy relationships throughout their lives. With a little guidance, sibling rivalry can evolve into lifelong friendship and mutual respect, creating a more peaceful and connected family environment.

November 6, 2024

From pages to possibilities : How to inspire a love of reading in your child

In South Africa, the ability to read for meaning is a critical skill that remains elusive for many children. According to the Reading Panel 2030 report, a staggering 78% of Grade 4 learners cannot read for meaning in any language. This alarming statistic underscores the urgent need to foster a love of reading among students to ensure their academic success and personal development. “Reading is foundational to learning and personal growth. It enhances vocabulary, improves comprehension, and stimulates imagination. Moreover, reading is linked to better academic performance across all subjects. For South Africa, where educational disparities are significant, promoting reading can be a powerful tool to bridge the gap and empower future generations,” says Kassandra Strydom, Academic Advisor: Foundation Phase at ADvTECH, Africa’s leading private education provider. Strydom emphasises that in a world dominated by social media and mobile devices, keeping a child’s interest in reading can be challenging. However, she underscores that this is a vital responsibility for parents. “By integrating reading into daily life from a young age, and making it an enjoyable activity, parents can help their children develop a lifelong love for reading, thereby improving their prospects of personal and academic achievement,” she says. Strydom notes that the findings of the Reading Panel 2030 report highlight the critical need for efforts to ensure that all children in South Africa can read for meaning by 2030. And while the Department of Education committed to addressing challenges identified in the report at a recent session where Basic Education Minister Siviwe Gwarube delivered the keynote address, the mammoth task could not be left to educators alone, she said. “Schools and teachers play an important role in teaching students how to read, but few are equipped to instil a genuine love for reading by the time children begin formal education. This essential passion must be nurtured at home to create a supportive environment where students can thrive once they master their ABCs.” Strydom says parents play a pivotal role in nurturing a child’s love for reading, and says it can be done by: CREATING A READING-FRIENDLY ENVIRONMENT & LEADING BY EXAMPLE Second-hand books are often very affordable, and libraries are free, making it easy for families to fill their homes with a diverse selection that caters to their child’s interests and reading level. Choosing books together can be a fun and exciting activity, providing valuable parent-child bonding time. Once the books have been selected, engaging in paired or shared reading experiences can enhance this connection. Creating opportunities to read together in a relaxed and intimate setting—whether snuggled on the couch or curled up in bed—makes reading feel special. This not only fosters a love for reading but also connects the activity to positive emotions and quality time spent together. By modelling positive reading habits and setting aside dedicated reading time each day, parents can help cultivate a lifelong passion for books in their children. USING TECHNOLOGY WISELY Excessive screen time can negatively impact children’s development, prompting many schools to limit mobile phone usage to create more focused learning environments. To balance screen time at home, families can implement “reading timeouts” that benefit both child and parent. While there are numerous reading apps and platforms that can make reading engaging, it’s important to choose those that offer personal learning pathways, allowing children to explore content beyond just reading. These apps can foster deeper engagement with reading material by connecting it to real-world situations and encouraging critical thinking. However, it’s essential to also incorporate non-screen reading to ensure children develop a well-rounded love for literature alongside their digital experiences. MAKING READING AN INTERACTIVE EXPERIENCE When fostering a love for reading, it’s important to ensure that the experience is interactive. Encourage children to engage with books before diving into the text by taking time for ‘picture walks’, where they can flip through pages and explore the illustrations. This approach helps minimise distractions and prepares them for a more focused reading experience. Consider using the “5 W” principle—asking who, what, when, where, and why questions about the book—to spark discussion and curiosity. Before reading, ask children what they think the story might be about, and always include the follow-up question, “How do you know that?” This encourages them to articulate their thoughts and develops metacognition—thinking about their thinking—making the reading experience richer and more meaningful.

November 6, 2024

Important Questions to Ask Your Child’s Audiologist

Empowering Your Child’s Hearing Health Journey As a parent, it is essential to advocate for your child’s hearing health. If you are concerned about your child’s hearing, preparing for appointments with an audiologist can make a significant difference in understanding your child’s condition and ensuring that your child receives the best care possible. Here are some of the critical issues to consider, and why they matter. CHOOSING AN AUDIOLOGIST Finding the right audiologist is a key step in caring for your child’s audiological needs. Audiologists who work with children should be caring, supportive of your questions and need for knowledge, and careful to take the time to fully understand your child’s home and school experience. Choices that you make together must be underpinned by an attitude of child- and family-centred care. The assessment and management of hearing loss in children can differ to management of the same issues in an adult, so your chosen audiologist should demonstrate care and knowledge about your child’s ‘whole person’ environment! What Can We Expect from a Hearing Test? Knowing what may be involved in a hearing evaluation can help ease your (and your child’s) apprehension, making it comfortable to ease into the assessment. So read this link to find out more about a common testing process. Then, also ask: What Type of Hearing Loss May My Child Have? Understanding whether your child has normal hearing, or whether a sensorineural, conductive, or mixed hearing loss is present, is crucial. This knowledge helps you comprehend the underlying cause/s and the most suitable management options. You can follow this up with: What Are the Management Options for Hearing Loss? If a hearing loss is identified, different management options are available to help your child function more effectively. Hearing aids are often appropriate ways to restore adequate sound when a hearing loss is permanent or semi-permanent because access to sound is essential for language and academic development. You may also be referred to an ENT or GP if the problem is amenable to treatment. Transient problems represent opportunities to return hearing to normal, quickly. Be empowered to make informed decisions about your child’s care! Ask questions like: How Do I Know What Type of Hearing Aid is Best for My Child? If semi-permanent or permanent hearing loss is identified, you may be exploring hearing aid options with your audiologist. Hearing aids come in a variety of styles and technologies, suitable for different acoustic, aesthetic, or contextual needs. These differences can also affect affordability. Knowing which options may suit your child’s lifestyle and hearing needs ensures that the best benefits may be achieved. Also, ensure that your audiologist explains your child’s full management plan, including the frequency of visits, regularity of device adjustments, and maintenance or servicing requirements. Good management is likely to result in a continuously good hearing experience. How Can We Protect My Child’s Remaining Hearing? Good hearing habits are essential to preserve your child’s remaining hearing and prevent further deterioration. Your audiologist should advise you about hearing safety so that you can protect your child’s hearing function. This may include bespoke hearing or ear protection. What Should We Do If My Child’s Hearing Changes? Monitoring your child’s hearing subjectively (through your own observation of their responses) and objectively (with regular hearing assessment) ensures that you can alter your plan if your child’s hearing circumstances change. Problems can be tiny (such as a blocked tube or dead battery) to significant (such as an ear infection). Your audiologist can teach you to troubleshoot problems for self-maintenance or help you to check your devices. A good audiologist will also advise you about what signs and symptoms to look for that may require a consultation. Are There Support Groups or Resources Available? Connecting with other parents and families with similar experiences can provide emotional support and practical advice. Often, audiologists can provide you with details for local or online support groups and useful parent resources. You can be properly empowered, uplifted, and encouraged by the right professional to support your child’s hearing needs throughout childhood. Our NB Hearing & Balance Team Is Here to Support Your Family Being proactive and informed about your child’s hearing health is vital. By asking these questions and asserting your needs, you can make informed decisions that ensure your child receives the best possible care. If you are ready to take the next step in your child’s hearing health journey, schedule a consultation with one of our NB Hearing & Balance audiologists. We have convenient locations across the Cape Peninsula, including Wynberg, Durbanville, Sea Point, Hout Bay, and Noordhoek.

November 5, 2024

Effective Strategies for Managing Intense Emotions in Children

Managing intense emotions in young children, especially when they manifest as anger or frustration, can be challenging for any parent. Dibber International Preschools is committed to providing parents and educators with practical strategies for handling these situations effectively. With a focus on children aged 0 to 6 years, Dibber is helping families across South Africa support emotional growth and foster positive behaviours. “Emotional regulation is a skill children can learn from an early age,” says Ursula Assis, Country Director of Dibber International Preschools. “By teaching children ways to understand and manage their feelings, we are equipping them with tools for life, allowing them to navigate their emotions with resilience and empathy.” One of the key principles behind managing intense emotions in children is validation. When a child has a meltdown or displays aggressive behaviour, the initial step is acknowledging their feelings rather than jumping straight into discipline. Simple affirmations like, “I can see you’re upset,” help children feel understood and can reduce the intensity of their emotions. Assis explains that grounding techniques are also highly effective. “For instance, the ‘Five Senses Activity’ encourages children to identify something they can see, hear, touch, smell, and taste. This practice helps shift their focus from overwhelming emotions to the present moment, providing an immediate calming effect.” Observing patterns and identifying triggers that lead to emotional outbursts is another valuable approach. “If a child becomes irritable when hungry, it’s best to avoid challenging conversations or activities during that time,” Assis advises. “This approach not only helps parents manage child aggression but also teaches children the importance of self-awareness.” Dibber encourages parents to discuss emotions with their children during calm moments, helping them recognise the physical and mental signs of intense emotions. By teaching children to notice when their body feels tense or when specific thoughts accompany frustration, parents empower them to use self-regulation techniques. Deep breathing, counting, or taking a momentary break are all strategies that can prevent emotions from escalating. “Children learn so much by watching their parents. When parents model healthy emotional regulation, they demonstrate that it’s okay to feel strong emotions and that there are positive ways to handle them. These shared practices turn self-regulation into a bonding experience and a valuable learning opportunity,” says Assis. Through strategies like grounding techniques, validation, and modelling, Dibber International Preschools is helping parents and educators manage child aggression effectively. “Our goal is to foster an environment where children learn to navigate their emotions with confidence and compassion. These early lessons in emotional regulation lay the foundation for resilient, well-rounded individuals.”

November 5, 2024

Does your child suffer from low self-esteem?

When a child suffers from low self-esteem, it will almost always carry on into their adulthood if not addressed. Simple things such as meeting new people can be very difficult, as well as taking on challenges, valuing their own opinion and much more. It is so important for parents to understand just how crucial healthy self-esteem in a child can be because they have a crucial role to play in the development of their children’s sense of self-worth. If your child has a low self-esteem, parent intervention can prevent the following being carried through to adulthood. Poor communication skills: A child with low-esteem is likely to grow into an adult that has difficulty in communicating with others; whether it is with their spouse, coworkers or peers, as they often do not feel secure and confident with what they say and may be afraid to express themselves. Negative thoughts and feelings: Since a child with low self-worth will regularly have negative thoughts and feelings about themselves and even others, it will likely carry through into adulthood. Unfortunately, the difference in adulthood will be that they are more likely to keep their feelings internalised rather than expressing them. Hot temper: An adult with low self-esteem may have a hot temper. This is usually because of the frustration and constantly simmering negative thoughts that they experience. These bubble below the surface and spill over fairly readily when provoked. Blaming others: Instead of taking responsibility for things going wrong, they are often quick to blame others. This avoidance of responsibility takes blame from them and puts it onto others. For a while, they are able to feel buoyed up and justified. Difficulty with relationships: Relationship difficulty is common when your child takes their low self-worth into adulthood. It is hard to truly love and dedicated yourself to another when you don’t truly love yourself. What they end up giving to their partners is a less than whole self, often putting strain on the relationship. Keep in mind that while some of these signs may or may not carry through into adulthood, everyone is impacted differently. A child who has a low self-esteem won’t always be an adult with low self-esteem. Self-esteem is not a black-and-white-all-or-nothing matter. There are varying degrees of self-esteem or self-worth. A child can have very low self-esteem or just a little self-doubt which will impact how they transform into adults.

October 31, 2024

WHY DO CHILDREN LIE?

The question of why children lie begs the greater question of why any of us lie. If you think back to the last time you lied (and I’ll bet my life you can think of a time), look at what was going on internally and this will give you a good idea of why your children do it and how to avoid it in future. Now before we get to that, let me just say that we all have all traits. We are all liars sometimes and every one of us will be pushed to lie under certain circumstances. So firstly, please never label your child as a liar. Once we apply a label to a child they are more likely (not less) to repeat this behaviour and to incorporate it into their sense of self as they grow up. ALL children lie sometimes (as do ALL adults). Ok, so it’s normal to lie sometimes, but why, and why do some lie more often? Going back to why we all do, lying is a fear-based behaviour. The child believes, for whatever reason, that if they tell the truth it will result in more pain than pleasure. And where do they get this message? From us, of course. We’re constantly giving kids unconscious messages that telling the truth will get you in trouble. “Who ate the sweets?” “I did” “Right, go to your room”. Sound familiar? What we need to get into the habit of doing is praising truth-telling and taking responsibility more than we punish “bad” behaviour. If our children own up and say that they “did it” we should be actively praising this behaviour and pointing out that while the behaviour is not ok with us, we’re really impressed that they told the truth. Children will only lie if they are afraid of our reaction to the truth. I know that many people worry that if they take this approach they will be too soft on the bad behaviour and will end up with unruly kids. One of the fundamental structures for well-behaved, compliant children is being their primary attachment (which implies complete trust, openness and closeness). If your children trust you completely and feel connected to you and loved no matter what they do they will actually be less likely to produce so called “bad” behaviours in the long run. Of course they will make mistakes along the way and present “negative” traits (like we all do) including lying, but this will not develop into any kind of delinquency if that adult-child connection is in place. And part of keeping it in place is keeping the lines of communication open and allowing your children to tell the truth and know they will be safe. I think this is a fundamental skill to work on when your children are little and to instil a sense of open communication and acceptance BEFORE they become teenagers. Once our kids hit the teen years, if we’ve shut off honest communication, we are in for a different level of trouble with our children lying to us about things that can be life threatening, or where they really could use our adult help and guidance. The next time your child lies to you think about why they would be afraid to tell the truth and then instead of punishing them for lying, rather address the rift in your relationship.

October 29, 2024

Four Classic Reasons a Child Misbehaves

I’ve been working with parents and other caregivers for over 20 years, helping them find solutions to their children’s challenging behaviour s. The adults who come to me want to know what to do about the behaviour and providing them with easy-to-apply solutions is my ultimate goal. To get there, I ask the caregivers a series of questions about the behaviour and all contributing factors that will help lead me to the underlying problem that is causing the child’s challenging behaviour. According to leading psychologists, a child’s behaviour falls into one of these four primary categories. See if you can connect past or reoccurring incidents of challenging behaviour from your child, to either of these. Communications When a child is tired, grouchy, and whiny, he or she is not likely to walk up to the parent and say, “Gee dad, I’m feeling a little tired right now. Do you mind if I lie down and take a nap?” They are however, very likely to not cooperative, throw a fit, or refuse to get into the car seat. In this case, their behaviour is communication about the fact that they have had enough stimulation and need sleep. Expression of Needs On occasion I would take my 3 year old granddaughter to the mall with me and like her mother many years before; I would sometimes end up chasing her through the crowd. In a quick moment if I let go of her hand, with a mischievous smile she would run from me yelling, “Catch me grandpa!” Her giggling told me that she wanted to play with me and her way of expressing that need was to run away and get me to chase after her. This required me to firm up the boundaries on the next trip and to find more appropriate ways to satisfy her need to play. Experimentation A woman contacted me for help with her five year old. The little girl began walking around on her hands and knees, barking like a dog. She was probably experimenting with the act of pretending to be a dog, to see what it felt like, and to see what the reaction of her adult caregivers would be. The woman initially became very annoyed with the constant barking. Her scolding created a new motivation in her daughter to do it more because it became unexpectedly fun for the little girl to drive mommy crazy! Unconscious Drives Famed psychodynamic psychologist Sigmund Freud believed that processes are constantly working in the unreachable subconscious region of the mind. These processes are thoughts that can trigger emotions and behaviour s in an adult or a child. If a child is living in a situation where adult chaos is present, the chaos can become worry, fear, or anxiety for a child which can then generate challenging behaviour s for the caregivers. The adult chaos may be in the form of parents fighting, a single mother feeling and acting stressed, parents and grandparents in conflict, or even a teacher who has not been taking care of herself. Children look to their caregivers for a sense that things are OK and when they don’t appear OK, the child is likely to reflect that unstable sense through their own behaviour .

October 25, 2024

A Bump To The Head: When Should You Worry?

I have attended to many children in the ER who have taken a tumble. In the US, falls account for around half the injury-related ER visits in children under 5 years of age. Most of these falls involve furniture such as changing mats, high chairs, baby walkers and beds. Parents are almost always concerned about head injuries. Majority of head injuries from a fall are usually minor. Children under one who fall are more likely to sustain head injuries regardless of the height from which they fall. Whereas older children are more prone to extremity fractures. This is because an infant’s head is much larger than the rest of their body. As a child grows, their head mass becomes more proportional and they develop upper body strength, which enables them to brace falls with their arms or legs. WHEN TO SEE A DOCTOR If your child is awake, alert and behaving normally after a bump to the head with no other signs and symptoms then he or she will most likely be fine and you don’t have to rush to hospital right away. It’s a good idea to observe your child for 1-2 days afterwards, since symptoms of a brain injury may present late. Seek Medical Attention: For any bump to the head in an infant; If your child has lost consciousness, even if brief; If your child has any signs and symptoms of a concussion (see below); If your child is inconsolable; If your child is vomiting; If your child is difficult to wake; If your child has a seizure; and/or If you suspect a broken bone. If your child has had a bad fall and you suspect a neck injury DO NOT move your child. Call an ambulance right away! Always trust your gut. If you are unsure rather head straight to your nearest emergency room. CONCUSSION A concussion is a brain injury caused by a blow to the head. The signs and symptoms may be vague and may even take a few days to develop. It’s important to know that not all concussions cause a loss of consciousness. Concussions can be more difficult to diagnose in children, as they are not as vocal about their symptoms. Children older than 2 years will show more behavioural symptoms. Signs & symptoms will therefore depend on age and include but are not limited to: Irritable and fussy; Unusually sleepy; Crying more than usual; Change in appetite; Nausea and/or vomiting; Lack of interest in play; Headache; Confusion; Child is unsteady on his or her feet; Sensitivity to light and noise; Blurred or double vision; Dizziness; Unusual speech e.g.: slow or slurred; Poor concentration and memory; and/or Problems with co-ordination. DIAGNOSING A CONCUSSION The doctor will do a thorough evaluation. A CT scan and MRI cannot diagnose a concussion. A CT scan will however, most likely be ordered to exclude a brain bleed or skull fracture depending on the mechanism of injury and presenting symptoms. The majority of falls in children are caused by modifiable factors and are therefore preventable. It’s impossible to bubble wrap our kids and we shouldn’t have to. Falls and tumbles can teach our children valuable lessons, but we can spend time baby proofing our homes and being more cautious to prevent serious injury. Remember to always buckle your baby in their high chair and never leave him or her unattended on a changing mat, not even for a second – it takes seconds for an accident to happen. RESOURCES Burrows, P. et al. (2015) Head injury from falls in children younger than 6 years of age. Arch Dis Child, [online] 100 (11), pp. 1032-1037. Available from: https://0-www-ncbi-nlm-nih-gov.innopac.wits.ac.za/pmc/articles/PMC4680174/ [Accessed 3 October 2018]. CDC (2017) Traumatic Brain Injury & Concussion [online]. Available from: https://www.cdc.gov/traumaticbraininjury/symptoms.html [Accessed 3 october 2018]. Chaudhary, S. et al. (2018) Pediatric falls ages 0–4: understanding demographics, mechanisms, and injury severities. Inj Epidemiol, [online] 5 (suppl 1). Available from: https://0-www-ncbi-nlm-nih-gov.innopac.wits.ac.za/pmc/articles/PMC5893510/ [Accessed 3 October 2018]. Kendrick, D. et al. (2015) Risk and Protective Factors for Falls From Furniture in Young Children Multicenter Case-Control Study. JAMA Pediatr, [online] 169 (2), pp. 145-153. Available from: https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamapediatrics/fullarticle/1939058 [Accessed 3 October 2018]. Samuel, N. et al. (2015) Falls in young children with minor head injury: A prospective analysis of injury mechanisms. Brain Injury, [online] 29 (7-8), pp. 946-950. Available from: https://0-www-tandfonline-com.innopac.wits.ac.za/doi/full/10.3109/02699052.2015.1017005 [Accessed 3 October 2018].

October 25, 2024

ARE YOU ENCOURAGING YOUR CHILD TO REBEL WITHOUT KNOWING IT?

Control and freedom. We all want both. We like to feel some sense of power and authority and we definitely want the feeling that nobody has power or authority over us – freedom. These apparently contradictory ideas are actually one. What we all really want, the true control we want to yield, is the power over ourselves – to be able to direct our time and our lives and to be able to pursue what is most meaningful to us without interference from others. What we want is to control our own freedom. And parenting is the place where our misguided attempts to control others (instead of our own lives) plays out the most. If we sit quietly with our own frustration and anger and disappointment that we are directing towards our children and their behaviour; If we truly allow these feelings to surface without attack; If we go deeply into the pain underlying them, what we find is that our futile attempts to control our children always come from our own unresolved issues. Children pulse with their own life-force, with their own goals and dreams and desires. Children, too, have the innate desire to control their own freedom. But when we, the adults, are not living authentic lives then we feel the need to squash the freedom we see in them. We need to make them conform to the same societal expectations that killed our inner joy, to let go of childish fantasies and ‘grow up into the real world’. We create all sorts of control mechanisms – punishments, shaming, coercion, rewards and the giving or withholding of approval – and then agree on these as a society to justify our own sense of disillusionment with how our lives have panned out. We believe that our underlying motivation is pure: That we want our children to grow up and fit into society and be liked and acceptable. What we don’t realise is that the very techniques that we use to entice our children into conformity are the same things that will initiate their rebellion. Nobody can suppress their inner authenticity for long periods of time. Teenage rebellion is absolutely essential in a society that manipulates and coerces children into being something they are not; And is totally absent in communities that allow children freedom. What looks like successful control in childhood – a well-behaved, obedient child – is the perfect fertile soil for that teen rebellion. Control can never be an external factor. True control must always come from within. It must arise from living a life where we are true to ourselves and also allow others to be true to themselves. Children (and adults) who are internally free and happy and living on purpose never put obstacles the paths of others. It is fear that lies behind all other-control. And what we fear as parents is that our children will become unruly, unlikable delinquents. And our fear converts into control, which converts into rebellion, and we unwittingly create the very thing we are afraid of. Let your children be. But first, let yourself be. Take some time as you head into this new year to assess your life. Are you doing what you really want to do? Is your life meaningful and joyous and filled with engaging challenges? Are you free, or have you succumbed to the power of some authority? Do you wake in the morning excited to see what the day brings? There is a lot we can learn from our children if we stop trying to make them like us and instead we see if we could possibly be more like them. Start controlling your own life and your own freedom and you will see that letting go of control in terms of your children is not something you need to do, but something that will come naturally as you live a more authentic life. Sow the seeds of freedom in your own life and you will stop sowing the seeds of rebellion in theirs.

October 22, 2024

HOW TO ENCOURAGE A GROWTH MINDSET IN CHILDREN

Have you heard of a growth mindset? It’s become somewhat of a buzzword lately and that’s because it really does make a difference to a child’s ability to learn something and their confidence in trying new things. A fixed mindset is one in which we say things like: “I can’t do that” or “I am not good at something”. It’s the belief that our abilities are fixed – that we are either clever or not, either sporty or not. The growth mindset is the opposite. With a growth mindset we acknowledge that we can always improve with a bit of effort. We understand that our brains are not fixed, but constantly changing; that our abilities are not just genetic but influenced by what we do. We see that it is possible for all people to learn new things, even though it may be more of a challenge for some. Why does this matter? Well, with a fixed mindset a child is less likely to try new things, and more likely to give up when something gets difficult – which can seriously limit their options in life. It also leads to misidentification and self-handicapping – protecting themselves from failure by either not investing their self-esteem or identity into something difficult, or having a good excuse ready for falling short. So here are ten tips for maintaining and encouraging a growth mindset: Expose your children to information on how the brain changes and learns. Teach them that intelligence grows like a muscle and it needs challenge in order to get the right exercise. Don’t praise cleverness – praise effort. Focus on a child’s hard work rather than on the outcome of that work or on fixed measurements like IQ. Encourage failure. Praise children for giving something a go and for having the courage to face challenges. Let them celebrate their failures as a sign of being brave enough to try. Show them how failure leads to growth. Avoid superhero worship. Focus on everyday people who do amazing things through hard work and struggle. Tell them stories of your own doubts and challenges and how you made it through. Teach them to say, “How can I?” instead of “I can’t”. Using a question opens up creative thinking and stops the brain from giving up on the problem. Teach them to add “…yet” to the end of things they can’t do. For example, “I can’t do maths… yet”. This helps them to focus on what they still need to do to master something rather than on their current inability. Give them examples of others who have failed and succeeded e.g. basketball players missing more goals than they hit. Give them examples of where they have failed and succeeded e.g. struggling with a new computer game that they now play effortlessly. 10. Acknowledge their frustration when they are doing something difficult without jumping in and doing things for them. Everything is difficult at first. Our kids often don’t get good role models of this because they see us doing things that we’ve done for years and years and of course these things look easy. Then they try to do these same things and struggle. We need to remind them that we also struggled once. In fact, everyone struggles to some degree with a new task. But with practice and a dedication to continue, everything gets easier. We were all born with the ability to learn and grow – not just some people.

October 18, 2024

FOUR THINGS TO DO WITH AN EXPLOSIVE AND ANGRY CHILD OR TEEN

Before I go any further on this topic, it’s always a good idea to seek professional help with a child or teen who frequently becomes explosive and angry when told no. Keep in mind that this column is not a substitute for psychotherapy or family counselling. The advice that I offer is supplemental parent coaching that can help in many situations. The subject of today’s article is a common issue that many parents bring to me in my parent coaching practice. Generally, the child is usually anywhere from 7 to 14 years of age and often explodes at the smallest of problems, especially when they are told they can’t have or do something. The child is also likely to take out their anger on the parent or a sibling. So while you’re waiting for the appointment with your therapist regarding this problem, here are four things you can do immediately. Help them find their place in the family. A large majority of these children tend to be first born. For many years, they enjoyed being in the family ‘spotlight’ and getting all of their parents’ love and attention. But as other children joined the family, they lost their place and don’t like it. By getting angry with limits and boundaries, they found a new and inappropriate way to fit in by becoming vocal and angry. Help them regain their position as the oldest child by seeking their help, their advice, and their assistance. Find purposeful ways for them to be in charge of activities that helps with the other children, such as reading to them, teaching, or mentoring. Allow them to have a few more privileges than the others so they will feel special and valuable to you. Stop doing too much for your child. The triggers that cause the explosive episodes are sometimes over the parent trying to get the child to wake up in the morning, dressing them, controlling laundry, or getting them out of the house in the morning. If you’re trying to control the outcome of everything, stop. Some parents struggle with turning some responsibilities over to their children and many children or teens don’t like being controlled. Acknowledge good behaviour more often. It’s unfortunate that it’s normal for many parents to point out when their children aren’t doing what they should, more often than pointing out when they ARE doing something good. Make it your mission to make a bigger deal of when your children are behaving or doing as you’d like them to do. Spend more time with the explosive child. His behaviour may be his way of telling you that he doesn’t feel loved by, or important enough to, you. Schedule a date with each of your children (especially the explosive child) every week, even if it means for just a few minutes. Avoid taking him or her out to buy them something. The date should be about the experience of being together, not showering them with material things. Finally, when the anger comes out, don’t give it value by trying to stop it or by fighting back. Remain calm, stay quiet, and be ready to listen.

September 27, 2024

Budgeting with children

Having children gives you a myriad of rewards that we all get to brag about. However, what’s not often spoken about is the costs surrounding raising children. When you have a child, costs can sky-rocket if you are not careful. However, there are ways you can budget and save when you have a baby or toddler. Write your budget down One of the biggest personal finance mistakes people make is not knowing exactly where their money is going. One takeaway coffee here, another quick grocery shop there, and our budget goes out the window. Try this exercise. Carry a notebook with you wherever you go. For one week, write down absolutely everything you spend money on. From in-store shopping to online shopping. Once you have done that, you can take a realistic look at where your money is going when it comes to the small things. Is there anything on that list you don’t have to have? Then cut it out. Add these expenditures to your usual monthly debts and expenses, and you will have a great starting point to start your saving journey. Make budgeting a team effort Budgeting with your partner is essential. When you are sharing the costs of a child and a home, knowing who spends money on what is important. Sit down with your partner and have an open discussion about where money is coming in and going out. Make decisions on who is paying for certain expenses and stick to that. Savings should be an expense You should have a ‘savings’ section under your expenses. No matter how small the amount, savings should not come at the end of your budget with the thought process of ‘I will save what is left over.’ You should try and save before you spend any money. Whether it is to a savings pocket, an investment fund, or a short-term endowment policy – make putting a little money aside a priority. Cut back on expenses Once you know where your money is going, it is much easier to start cutting back on certain things. Amazed at how much money you spend on takeaways? You probably didn’t know the extent of that amount until you had it written in front of you. Go through your expenses, set aside a reasonable amount for spoils, and cut back on the rest. Baby saving tips Buy in bulk – keep a lookout for any specials on baby products and groceries and buy these in bulk. Remember to consider that your baby is growing and may need a new size nappy or different aged formula in the near future. Significant bulk purchases for savings are nappies, wet wipes, toiletries, unperishable food, and cleaning products. Make your own food – we know this is time-consuming, but bulk-making your own baby/toddler food and freezing it into portions is a fantastic money saver. Try to stick to one-pot meals that are filled with nutrients and label your freezing containers with the content and date. Google affordable meal recipes, and you will be surprised by the number of affordable meals out there. Clinic vaccinations – When vaccinating your child, take the extra time to go to your local government clinic for them. The wait may be longer, but the cost-saving is worth it. If you would like to get the vaccinations that are only available privately, then book with a private clinic for just those. Second-hand goods – It’s easy to get swept up in the mania of baby products and goods. And there may be a part of you that wants to ‘keep up with the Jones’. But we are here to tell you that your baby won’t notice whether their pram or cot is brand new or second-hand. Decide what you are willing to have second hand, then search the web and Facebook marketplace for the best deals you can find. Please just make sure that you do not pay upfront for items that you haven’t seen! Sell it – If you are not planning on having another child in the near future, as soon as your baby outgrows something – sell it!

September 25, 2024

Safety and sustainability from a single pool cover – the PowerPlastics Solid Safety ticks all the boxes

The PowerPlastics Solid Safety Cover is the leading child safety pool cover in South Africa, favoured for its tamperproof design, overall aesthetics and its ability to create a more sustainable pool. The PVC cover is supported by batons that rest on the coping and the tension is created with ratchets, providing a complete barrier over the pool. The upside to the water being sealed off to the natural elements is that the cover also saves water, electricity and chemicals. Parts of South Africa are experiencing water shortages due to either drought or struggling infrastructure, so the need to save water is critical. A solid safety cover gives 98% water savings. And because the water is kept cleaner, the amount of chemicals and filtration needed is reduced. This could have a huge impact on alleviating load shedding if every pool was filtered less. Add these savings up month by month, coupled with safety benefits, and you will find yourself getting a lot more out of your pool – child safety as well as sustainability and a reduced carbon footprint from one pool cover, putting your mind at ease on multiple levels. This is what makes safety covers stand out when compared to other safety methods like nets and fences which still leave the water exposed to the natural elements. PowerPlastics Pool Covers first designed the PowerPlastics Solid Safety Cover, which has gone on to become the bestselling cover to prevent drownings. The cover tolerates 220kg and can be semi-automated to allow for single-person use. There is no substitute for adult supervision but by using the PowerPlastics Solid Safety Cover as one ‘layer of safety’, you will achieve further peace of mind as well as rescuing your household budgets. Learn more and get an instant quote on the PowerPlastics Pool Covers online store. www.powerplastics.co.za There are safety covers, and then there are safety covers. Know what you are buying. Understand compliance. Remember this is your child or pet’s life on the line here so it is perfectly OK to ask the difficult questions. A solid safety cover may seem like an easy enough cover to copy but a poor understanding of materials, installation methods and cover upkeep, coupled with lack of experience, all have a direct impact on your cover’s efficiency and longevity. When efficiency relates to lives, it can’t be more critical. If you have any reservations about a pool safety supplier, trust your instinct and go with a brand like PowerPlastics Pool Covers that has been covering pools for decades, not weeks. The questions get a lot harder after a tragedy has occurred in your pool and you are found to be non compliant with SANS 10134. The finer details of safety compliance There has been wide industry collaboration and years of research that has gone into laying out the pool safety guidelines and, in South Africa, the function is addressed by the SABS, forming part of the national building standards, specifically SANS 10134. The cover specs you need to know / the technical questions you should be asking the pool cover supplier to ensure your compliance are: Are there any gaps or openings that allow unsupervised entry? If yes, can I fit a ball of 9cm x 14cm x 30cm through the gap? (this being the size of a child’s head or torso). Can the device bear weights of up to 220 kg? (static load test). Opening test – is the cover sufficiently anchored to prevent a child gaining access to the pool water? Does rain or sprinkler water drain off so the cover is dry within 10 minutes, with no pools forming on top of the cover?

September 20, 2024

Seven tips for supporting your child to develop a love for reading

As well as providing children a window through which to explore their imaginations, reading books allows for the development of essential skills for school and later life. These include comprehension, a wider vocabulary, increased concentration and self-motivation, an awareness of the world around them (particularly if they are interested in non-fiction), and higher levels of empathy and emotional intelligence through relating to the characters they encounter in their favourite books. Some children have a natural interest in reading – they will happily nestle down and read a book of their choice. Christopher Melrose, Deputy General Manager of Kumon Australia & New Zealand, recalls that he was such a child. “I used to enjoy reading the Doctor Do-Little series, and a series called The Three Investigators, about three young boys who solved crime mysteries”, Christopher says. “There was a book by Gerald Durrel called, My Family And Other Animals, which I loved. It was set on a Greek island named Corfu”. “I also used to get given our school textbook list at the end of the year. I remember I was always really excited on the day that I received all my school books [and] I’d actually read all of the novels that were on the reading list for that year. I wasn’t doing it to get ahead or for academic reasons; I just liked reading”. Now Christopher is adamant about encouraging children to read for enjoyment, both for children who are naturally inclined and those who might be a bit more reluctant. Below, we provide some solutions for parents who want to see their children develop a love for reading. When they are young, read aloud with your child Children are never too young to be exposed to reading. Reading aloud to your children introduces them to the beauty of language. When your child observes you reading, they will follow your example and in time, will start to read on their own. We recommend you spend 5-10 minutes reading a book to your young child every day. When reading aloud, make it fun When reading together with your child, let them hold the book. It’s often easier to sit behind your child as they do this. Make sure you read with lots of expression. Put on different voices for book characters – the more fun you make it, the more they will develop a love of books and reading. Before reading a book aloud for the first time, it is best to read the book to yourself first. This will allow you to add more expression when you read it to your child. Establish a routine for reading We highly recommend creating a reading routine. For example, 10 minutes reading before school or at bedtime will demonstrate the importance of daily reading. You may like to schedule in regular visits to your local library to attend events such as story times that promote reading together with your child. If your child is reading independently, spend time at the library or bookstore (or even online for e-books) choosing books together. You can then read passages from each other’s selected books to share the excitement and love of reading. Choose books that are appropriate for their current ability As your child reads, always keep in mind whether the book is suitable for their ability. If your child is having trouble reading a word, simply tell them what the word is so they can continue reading. If they are making many mistakes and losing enthusiasm for the book, it may be best to choose an easier book instead. Visiting Kumon’s Recommended Reading List could be a helpful first step in choosing the most appropriate book: https://www.kumon-english-rrl.com/ When they are ready, encourage your child to read a wide-range of books Children can be encouraged to read on their own at any age. Most children will develop a strong reading habit and love for reading when parents actively read to them from a young age. Reading a range of books broadens knowledge and interest in further learning. Consider recommending not only fiction but non-fiction books for your child to read. This will broaden their knowledge of particular topics. Turn reading into a family activity Be sure you ask your child to describe to you their favourite part of the book they are currently reading. Some families have special book-reading times where all family members sit together and quietly read their own books. This is often followed by a few minutes of discussion. Seek out reading opportunities that go beyond books When visiting public spaces like museums or parks, draw your child’s attention to the great variety of information that can always be found at such places. This helps link reading to real life. The Kumon English programme aims to foster a love of reading and learning in every child. To find out more about what Kumon has to offer, visit www.kumon.co.za. This article is courtesy of the Kumon Australia website* __________________________________________________________________________________ * https://au.kumonglobal.com/seven-tips-for-supporting-your-child-to-develop-a-love-for-reading/

September 18, 2024

Understanding Responsive vs Reactive Parenting

Parenting is a journey filled with countless moments that shape a child’s development and the dynamics within a family. In South Africa, where diverse cultures and traditions influence how children are raised, understanding the difference between responsive and reactive parenting can be particularly valuable. Responsive parenting is about tuning into your child’s needs and responding thoughtfully and emphatically. It involves actively listening to both verbal and nonverbal cues, understanding and validating their feelings, and creating a stable environment where they feel secure. When parents respond with empathy and encouragement, they not only support their child’s exploration and learning but also provide the guidance and reassurance necessary for healthy development. “In South Africa, where the emphasis on strong community and family ties is deeply ingrained, responsive parenting plays a crucial role in fostering trust and connection within the family,” says Ursula Assis, Country Director of Dibber International Preschools. “Being responsive to your child’s needs, especially in communal settings like family gatherings, helps them feel integrated and valued, laying a strong foundation for their emotional development, self-esteem, and social skills.” On the other hand, reactive parenting occurs when responses to situations are driven more by immediate emotions rather than thoughtful consideration. This often results in quick reactions to a child’s behaviour without fully understanding their needs or the context of the situation. Emotional reactions, rather than considered responses, can lead to inconsistency in discipline and create confusion for children about what is expected of them. In busy households, where parents juggle multiple responsibilities, reacting impulsively can strain relationships and create a tense home environment. Finding the right balance between responsive and reactive parenting is key to nurturing a healthy family dynamic. One effective strategy is to take a moment to pause and breathe before reacting to challenging behaviour. This pause allows parents to respond more thoughtfully and constructively rather than impulsively. Understanding a child’s unique temperament and needs can also help tailor responses more effectively. For example, if a child feels overwhelmed in a busy setting, offering a calm and reassuring response can help them feel more comfortable. “Parenting is not about being perfect; it’s about being present and intentional,” adds Assis. “Parents can gain valuable insights and encouragement by seeking support from family, friends, or parenting groups. Regularly reflecting on your parenting approach and adjusting as needed can also help strike a better balance between responsiveness and reactivity.” Parenting is a continuous learning experience. Parents can create a nurturing environment that supports their child’s growth and development by striving to be more responsive and less reactive. In a country like South Africa, where family and community play such a crucial role, responsive parenting benefits children and strengthens the bonds within families and communities. Embracing the journey with patience and reflection fosters a loving environment where children can truly thrive.

September 16, 2024

Transport Month and the Silent Killer Let’s Be Quick to Save Lives

The African Brain Child research group (ABC) in Paediatric Neurosurgery at the University of Cape Town found that our hospital sees some 2 000 children (age 0 -12) with head injuries annually. Road accidents account for almost 80% of severe head injuries in children at the hospital. Of children admitted after a severe TBI (traumatic brain injury) sustained as a passenger in motor vehicle accidents, 96% were not wearing a seatbelt. Statistics showed a 22.6% increase in the Western Cape’s road accident deaths for the festive season last year. According to Arrive Alive, car safety seats reduce the risk of death in passenger cars by 71% for infants and 54% for toddlers. Since 2012 over 11 500 children have been placed in car safety seats through the Car seats for kids campaign run by our partner, Wheel Well. The “Be Quick to Click Car Seat Drive 2024”, initiated by African Brain Child in partnership with Supa Quick and Wheel Well, is a call to safeguard the lives of children against traumatic brain injuries (TBI’s) – “the silent killer” – by putting more children into secure car safety seats this October, Transport Month. Anthony Figaji, Professor of Neurosurgery, South African National Research Foundation SARChI Chair of Clinical Neurosciences, and Director of African Brain Child, sees road accidents as the single biggest killer of healthy children in South Africa: “We have seen the human cost of motor vehicle accidents and TBI’s in children we have not been able to save” he says. “We have also seen those we have been able to save, but whose lives have been permanently impacted by injury that is readily preventable with the click of a seatbelt. There is an African saying that ‘It takes a village to raise a child.’ It also takes one to protect it. We need to rally personal responsibility around seatbelt usage – together as society.” For children, surviving a TBI often isn’t the end of the story; emerging research shows that a single TBI may cause long term inflammation that can damage neurons for years after the injury. This means that a child suffering a TBI today may face further degeneration of their brain 20 or even 30 years from now. From gathering dust to saving lives: an urgent call for car seats Seatbelts are an essential safeguard against TBI’s for older children, but toddlers and babies need the protection of a quality car safety seat. It is illegal in South Africa for an infant (a child under 3 years) to travel without being strapped into a suitable car seat – but they can be expensive and something that many families simply can’t afford. In South Africa, most children impacted by TBI’s are from lower-income households. At the same time, many families have car seats, quickly outgrown and now unused, sitting in the garage – “we’ll get around to selling it online at some point” – that could be donated, refurbished and fitted to safeguard the life of a child. How concerned South Africans can support the Be Quick to Click campaign: Car Seat Donations: Unused car seats can be dropped off at any Supa Quick branch nationwide and Be Quick to Click will donate it to a family that needs it in October, Transport Month. The Be Quick to Click team will clean, inspect, and ensure that each seat meets the highest safety standards, before passing it on to a family in need. Car Seat Sponsorship: By making a financial contribution, individuals or companies will directly support efforts to provide safe car seats for children across South Africa. Donations will help Be Quick to Click to cover the costs of cleaning, refurbishing and certifying used car seats, or purchasing new ones, for families who need them. Every donation counts toward making our roads safer for children. Receive a Car Seat: To mark Transport Month Be Quick to Click, Supa Quick and Wheel Well will hand over donated, checked and vetted car seats to families on 26 October 2024 at Supa Quick, cnr Main & Constantia Main Rd, Plumstead, Cape Town. Any family wanting to receive a car seat can come down to Supa Quick between 9am – 12pm to receive a car seat on the day. Support Be Quick to Click: Be Quick to Click is a project of the African Brain Child Initiative to drive public awareness, both in road users and authorities, of the importance of seatbelt usage and the ready prevention of TBI’s. ABC is an internationally respected, leading research unit in traumatic brain injury in Sub-Saharan Africa. Based in the Paediatric Neurosurgery Unit at Red Cross War Memorial Children’s Hospital, ABC is committed to providing advanced medical and surgical care, innovative research and promoting public awareness through social engagement. To join the drive to save lives, visit https://bequicktoclick.com/car-seat-drive/ For more information on the impact and prevention of TBI’s in children, download the Be Quick to Click Research Report here.

September 16, 2024

Parent’s late night worries proliferating Google searches: What are the top eight concerns?

As the world quiets down and little ones drift off to sleep, many parents find themselves in the glow of their screens, typing out their latest concerns and questions. The age of instant information has made it easy for parents to seek answers in the middle of the night. Kelly Eyre, Quality and Pedagogy Lead at Dibber International Preschools explores the top eight concerns keeping South African parents of children under six awake and offers insights and advice to ease those worries. Developmental Milestones Every parent wonders if their child is on track with their development. From the first words to taking those initial steps, concerns about whether a child is meeting milestones can be overwhelming. Parents often compare their children’s progress to others, which can fuel anxiety, especially when extended family or community members express concern. It’s crucial to remember that every child develops at their own pace, and there is a wide range of what is considered normal. However, if you’re concerned about your child’s development, it’s important to consult with professionals, including paediatricians, early childhood educators, and therapists. Teachers and managers of schools and early childhood centres can also provide valuable insights into your child’s progress and suggest activities to support their development at home. Health and Nutrition In South Africa, where access to healthcare can vary widely, parents may worry about whether their children are getting the right nutrients or are healthy. Concerns often centre around ensuring a balanced diet, understanding the importance of specific nutrients, and knowing how to handle common childhood illnesses like colds or fevers. South African parents may also face challenges related to food security and access to nutritious foods. It’s essential to offer a variety of foods and encourage healthy eating habits from an early age. Consulting with healthcare professionals, such as paediatricians and nutritionists, can provide reassurance and guidance. Understanding the local healthcare system and having access to emergency services or local clinics can also help parents manage health concerns more effectively. Education and Learning With the country’s diverse education system, parents often worry about giving their children a good start. Questions about the best early childhood education options, how to encourage a love of learning, and whether they’re doing enough at home are common. The country’s unique blend of public, private, and home-schooling options can make this decision even more complex. To support your child’s early education, consider engaging with teachers and school administrators to understand the curriculum and how you can complement learning at home. Creating a stimulating environment through educational toys, books, and interactive play can also nurture a love of learning. Remember, the goal is to foster a supportive learning environment that encourages curiosity and exploration, regardless of the formal schooling path chosen. Behavioural Issues Tantrums, picky eating, and bedtime struggles can cause sleepless nights for many parents. These common behavioural issues often lead parents to search for solutions and advice on managing these challenges without resorting to harsh discipline. Finding a balanced approach can be challenging in South Africa, where different cultural norms and parenting styles exist. Positive parenting techniques, such as using time-outs, setting clear boundaries, and offering choices, can help manage these behaviours. Understanding developmental stages and the reasons behind certain behaviours can also provide context and reduce frustration. Engaging with professionals, including paediatricians and child psychologists, can offer strategies tailored to your child’s needs. Additionally, teachers and caregivers can provide insights into your child’s behaviour in different settings and suggest consistent approaches across home and school environments. Safety Concerns In a country with diverse social and economic landscapes, safety is a top priority parents. Concerns often revolve around childproofing the home, road safety, and teaching children about stranger danger and personal safety. Given the country’s unique context, parents may also worry about neighbourhood safety, access to safe play areas, and emergency preparedness. To address these concerns, parents can take practical steps such as installing safety gates, securing hazardous items, and teaching children basic safety rules like not talking to strangers and understanding emergency contact information. Additionally, it’s beneficial to familiarize yourself with local safety resources and community support systems, including neighbourhood watches and emergency services. Schools and early childhood centres often have safety protocols in place, so engaging with teachers and administrators can also provide peace of mind and ensure consistent safety practices. Screen Time and Technology In our digital age, parents often worry about the impact of screen time on their young children. The prevalence of smartphones, tablets, and TVs has made it challenging to limit exposure, leading to concerns about the appropriate amount of screen time and its potential effects on development. South African parents may also face the challenge of balancing educational content with entertainment. Experts recommend that children under two years old should avoid screens altogether, and for older children, screen time should be limited to high-quality, educational content. Co-viewing programs with your child and discussing the content can enhance their understanding and learning experience. Encouraging other activities, such as outdoor play, reading, and creative arts, can provide a balanced approach to technology use. Schools and early childhood programs can also guide appropriate technology use, ensuring that it complements rather than dominates a child’s day. Socialisation and Friendships Parents frequently worry about their child’s social development, especially if they are shy or reserved. Common concerns include questions about making friends, attending playdates, and developing social skills. In South Africa’s culturally diverse context, parents may also consider how to expose their children to different languages and customs. Encouraging interaction with peers through playdates, preschool, and community events can help children develop social skills and build friendships. Participating in group activities, such as sports, dance, or cultural programs, can also foster social development and a sense of belonging. Parents can model positive social behaviour by demonstrating good manners, empathy, and effective communication. Additionally, teachers and early childhood educators can provide feedback on your child’s social interactions and suggest ways to support their development both in and out of the

September 12, 2024

Understanding the Differences between Hearing Loss and Auditory Processing in Children

Hearing loss and auditory processing issues are two distinct conditions affecting children’s ability to understand and interpret sounds in their environment. While they may share some similarities, such as difficulty with speech and language development, they require different approaches to diagnosis, intervention, and management. Hearing Loss vs. Auditory Processing Disorder Hearing loss refers to a reduced ability to hear sounds and can range from mild to profound. This can be caused by various factors, including: Genetics Conditions that occur in utero Infections Exposure to loud noises Structural abnormalities in the ear Children with hearing loss may have difficulty detecting soft sounds, understanding speech, and localising where sounds are coming from. On the other hand, auditory processing disorder (APD) involves difficulty processing and interpreting auditory information in parts of the auditory system in or after the ear, despite having normal hearing sensitivity. Children with APD may struggle with tasks such as following directions, understanding speech in noisy environments, and discriminating between similar sounds. Challenges and Implications Both hearing loss and APD can impact a child’s language development, academic performance, social interactions, and overall quality of life. Without appropriate intervention, these challenges can persist into adulthood and affect various aspects of functioning. Diagnosis Diagnosing hearing loss typically involves a comprehensive diagnostic hearing test, which includes tests to assess hearing sensitivity and the type and degree of hearing loss. In contrast, diagnosing APD is more complex. Audiologists use a test battery that isolates certain skills, such as being able to separate or join sounds, being able to identify rhythm and pitch sequences, being able to associate sounds with their meanings, and being able to fill in missing information when sound is incomplete or distorted, to mention a few. Early Intervention and Management: Early intervention is crucial for children with hearing loss or APD to maximise their potential for speech and language development. For children with hearing loss, intervention may include hearing aids, cochlear implants, auditory-verbal therapy, or sign language instruction, depending on the degree and type of hearing loss. For children with APD, intervention focuses on improving auditory processing skills and compensating for deficits. This may involve auditory training exercises and auditory processing therapy with an audiologist, environmental modifications to reduce background noise, and strategies to improve listening comprehension and academic performance. Sometimes, help may extend to speech-language therapy or occupational therapy to help with skills that have been impacted by the underlying auditory processing challenges. Whether It’s Hearing Loss or APD, We Can Help While hearing loss and auditory processing disorders present unique challenges, early detection, diagnosis, and intervention are key to minimising the impact on children’s development and functioning. At NB Hearing and Balance, our team of professional audiologists can help children with hearing-related difficulties thrive and reach their full potential by implementing appropriate support and management strategies for parents, educators, and other healthcare professionals. Contact any of our Cape Town offices, conveniently located in Sea Point, Durbanville, Hout Bay, Wynberg, and Noordhoek (Fish Hoek area) on 021 203 4327.

September 3, 2024

The Impact of Screen Time on Children’s Physical Development

In recent years, the proliferation of digital devices such as smartphones, tablets, computers, and televisions has significantly increased the screen time of children worldwide. While these technologies offer educational and entertainment benefits, excessive screen time can negatively impact children’s physical development. This article explores how screens affect children’s eyes, brain development, and sleep. Effects on Vision Digital Eye Strain One of the most immediate physical effects of excessive screen time is digital eye strain, also known as computer vision syndrome. Symptoms include dry eyes, blurred vision, headaches, and difficulty focusing. These issues arise because children, like adults, tend to blink less frequently when staring at screens, leading to dry eyes and discomfort. Moreover, prolonged focusing on screens can strain the eye muscles, causing fatigue. Myopia (Nearsightedness) There is growing concern about the link between screen time and the increasing prevalence of myopia among children. Research suggests that prolonged near work activities, such as reading or using digital devices, may contribute to the development and progression of myopia. A study published in the journal Ophthalmology found that the prevalence of myopia has increased significantly over the past few decades, partly due to lifestyle changes that include more screen time and less time spent outdoors. Outdoor playtime is crucial for eye health, as exposure to natural light and the opportunity to focus on distant objects can help prevent myopia. Encouraging children to take regular breaks from screens and spend time outside can be beneficial in mitigating this risk. Impact on Brain Development Cognitive Development Screen time can have both positive and negative effects on cognitive development, depending on the content and duration of exposure. Educational programs and interactive apps can support learning and skill development. However, excessive or inappropriate screen time can hinder cognitive growth. Studies indicate that children who spend too much time on screens may have difficulty developing critical cognitive skills, such as attention, memory, and problem-solving. The rapid shifts in attention required by fast-paced video games and shows can lead to shortened attention spans and reduced ability to concentrate on tasks that require sustained focus. Social and Emotional Development Excessive screen time can also affect social and emotional development. Children who spend significant time on screens may miss out on important face-to-face interactions with family and peers, which are crucial for developing social skills, empathy, and emotional regulation. Furthermore, exposure to inappropriate content or excessive use of social media can lead to increased anxiety, depression, and a distorted self-image. Effects on Sleep Disruption of Sleep Patterns One of the most well-documented effects of screen time on children’s physical development is its impact on sleep. The blue light emitted by screens interferes with the production of melatonin, the hormone responsible for regulating sleep-wake cycles. This disruption can lead to difficulty falling asleep, reduced sleep quality, and shorter sleep duration. A study published in the journal Pediatrics found that children with more screen time, especially in the evening, were more likely to experience sleep problems. These issues can have cascading effects on physical health, cognitive function, and emotional well-being. Sleep Deprivation and Its Consequences Sleep deprivation in children can result in various negative outcomes, including impaired academic performance, mood disturbances, and a weakened immune system. Lack of sleep can also contribute to obesity, as it affects hormones that regulate hunger and appetite. Ensuring that children have a consistent bedtime routine and limiting screen time, particularly before bed, can help promote better sleep hygiene. Strategies for Managing Screen Time Given the potential negative impacts of excessive screen time on children’s physical development, it is crucial for parents and caregivers to implement strategies to manage screen use effectively. Here are some recommendations: Set Limits: Establish clear guidelines for screen time, ensuring that it is balanced with other activities such as outdoor play, reading, and family interactions. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that children aged 6 and older have consistent limits on the time spent using media, while children younger than 6 should have no more than one hour of high-quality programming per day. Encourage Outdoor Activities: Promote outdoor play and physical activities to support overall health and reduce the risk of myopia. Time spent outside allows children to engage in physical exercise, socialize with peers, and experience natural light, all of which are beneficial for physical and mental well-being. Create Tech-Free Zones: Designate certain areas in the home, such as the dining room and bedrooms, as tech-free zones to encourage family interactions and promote healthy sleep habits. Model Healthy Habits: Parents and caregivers should model responsible screen use, demonstrating balanced media habits and prioritizing face-to-face interactions. Choose Educational Content: Select age-appropriate, educational content that supports learning and development. Co-viewing programs and engaging with children about the content can enhance the learning experience and provide opportunities for discussion. Monitor and Discuss Content: Be aware of the content children are exposed to and engage in open conversations about what they see and how it affects them. This can help children develop critical thinking skills and understand the impact of media on their thoughts and emotions. While screens are an integral part of modern life, it is essential to be mindful of their impact on children’s physical development. By understanding the potential risks associated with excessive screen time and implementing strategies to manage screen use, parents and caregivers can help support healthy growth and development. Encouraging a balanced approach to screen time, combined with outdoor play and face-to-face interactions, can promote children’s physical, cognitive, and emotional well-being in the digital age.

August 16, 2024

Quick tips for a safe pool

So you have a pool and you have small kids that you watch like hawks when outside. But do you really have total peace of mind? Could you get there in time if your toddler made it out to the pool while you were distracted for a moment? Drownings happen in seconds. To lower the statistics pool safety is now regulated by way of SANS 10134 – the recommended Standard for swimming pools. It is every home owner’s duty to understand and comply with this much-needed pool safety regulation. Quick tips for a safe pool: Cover the pool with the PowerPlastics Solid Safety Cover as soon as swimming is over. Always have an adult supervising. Use the Safety Monitor tag from PowerPlastics Pool Covers and request the free child drowning prevention guide. www.powerplastics.co.za Know what drowning looks like. It really isn’t like in movies with splashing and loud calls for help. In a drowning, the child can be upright and look like he/she is just treading water. Start CPR as soon as you find the child and don’t stop until paramedics get there. Always use a SABS-compliant safety cover such as the PowerPlastics Solid Safety Cover, which comes with certification. Thermal pool covers or ‘bubble’ covers that lie directly on the water should never be considered as child safety pool covers as they do not bear weight. Request a quote today or shop online. www.powerplastics.co.za info@powerplastics.co.za

August 6, 2024

Indoor Family Activities for those cold Winter Days South African Style

Winter often confines families indoors, but Dibber International Preschools encourages families to view this as an opportunity to bond and learn together. Ursula Assis, Country Director at Dibber International Preschools, emphasises the importance of embracing indoor activities that entertain and enrich. “During the colder months, it’s a great idea to engage in activities that keep our spirits high and our family connections strong,” says Assis. Creative Indoor Family Activities for the Winter Season Assis suggests several indoor activities that are perfect for family bonding during Winter: Teaching New Life Skills: This is an excellent time for children to learn practical skills such as sewing, cooking, or organising. These activities are not just educational; they are opportunities for families to bond over shared tasks and stories. In-House Dance Party: To keep energy levels up and beat the Winter blues, Assis recommends turning up the music for a dance party in your living room. This activity is fun for all ages and a wonderful way to stay active. Indoor South African Braai: Bring the beloved tradition of a braai indoors. Families can cook traditional dishes on the stovetop or oven, creating a festive and educational culinary experience. Indoor Scavenger Hunts: Transform a regular day into an adventure with an indoor scavenger hunt. This activity is fantastic for kids to explore their home environment in a fun and engaging way. DIY Craft Projects with a South African Twist: Crafting projects like beaded jewellery or mini Zulu shields occupy hands and open discussions about South African culture and heritage. Cooking Traditional South African Dishes Together: Winter is perfect for warming up the kitchen with the aromas of dishes like bobotie or koeksisters, teaching kids about culinary traditions while creating delicious meals. Storytelling and Writing: Encouraging children to tell stories or write together fosters creativity and language skills. This time can also be used to share family histories, deepening connections between generations. Creating a Family Time Capsule: Capture memories by creating a time capsule with items that signify current family life to be opened in the future. Playing Traditional South African Games: Games like Morabaraba or Jukskei teach children about cultural history while providing a fun challenge. Exploring South African Music and Dance: Discovering South African music’s diverse sounds and movements can be an enlightening and enjoyable experience for the whole family. Embracing the Spirit of Ubuntu Indoors “The spirit of Ubuntu—’ I am because we are’—guides our approach to these activities, reinforcing the interconnectedness and warmth within families and communities,” concludes Assis. By incorporating these engaging and educational activities into their routine, families can ensure that the winter season is a time of joy, learning, and togetherness.

July 25, 2024

Prevent child drownings with these practical tips for pool safety

Don’t let your pool’s water levels drop. Keeping the pool topped up allows for small arms to easily grab the edge if needed. For every two children in the pool, have one adult supervising and use the Safety Monitor tag system. The more children, the more supervisors needed. Be aware that children’s pool parties are high-risk events. Turn off fountains and water features. Not only do they waste water and power, they can cause ripples and splashing, making it harder to see when a child has encountered difficulty in the pool or has sunk to the bottom. Ensure that every adult in the home knows CPR, including domestic workers. Never hire a baby sitter or au pair who can’t swim. Don’t let anyone who has been drinking or on sedative medication supervise children in a pool. Don’t leave toys in or near an open pool as children will be tempted to retrieve them. Teach your child to swim fully clothed and with shoes on. If your child develops a fear of water, don’t ignore this – a child who panics is at greater risk of drowning. Never allow swimming after dark. Discourage your dogs from swimming. Children and pets in a pool are not a good mix. Never leave the pool without securing it with your PowerPlastics Solid Safety Cover. Never design / build a pool that cannot be secured for child safety. The PowerPlastics Solid Safety Cover is SA’s bestselling safety cover to prevent drownings. The baton and ratchet system creates a tensioned PVC cover that a child is not able to tamper with. Babyproof your pool with this safety cover and enjoy peace of mind!

July 17, 2024

Mamas Touch is Revolutionising Children’s Sleep with Weighted Sleeping Suits

Mamas Touch, an innovator in child sleep solutions, is revolutionising children’s sleep with its groundbreaking weighted sleeping suits. These unique suits are designed to address common sleep challenges faced by children and provide much-needed relief for parents. With a unique blend of comfort, security, and innovative design, Mamas Touch aims to provide the ultimate sleep solution for children weighing 10 kgs and up, including teenagers. Mamas Touch weighted sleeping suits are fully patented and trademarked and meticulously crafted to mimic the comforting sensation of a gentle hug. By incorporating gentle, evenly distributed weights on both the front and back, the suits help children feel secure and calm, promoting faster and longer-lasting sleep. This ensures that your child feels comforted regardless of their preferred sleeping position—be it on their front, back, or side. Unlike other sleep aids, Mamas Touch suits do not restrict movement, allowing children to walk and move freely. The inspiration for Mamas Touch came from Shannon and Tyronne Henning, parents who struggled with their son Jaxxon’s sleep issues. “We were desperate to find a solution that didn’t involve chemicals or one of us needing to constantly hold him while he slept,” says Shannon. “After countless sleepless nights, we created a suit that simulates the feeling of being held, and it worked wonders for Jaxxon. Now, we’re excited to share this solution with other parents.” Three Key Goals of Mamas Touch Weighted Sleeping Suits: Reduce Time to Fall Asleep: Helping children drift off to sleep faster, ensuring a smoother transition from wakefulness to sleep. Reduce Fussiness: Creating a calm and soothing environment that minimises tossing and turning, making bedtime a peaceful experience. Help Children Stay Asleep: Promoting longer and more restful sleep periods, allowing both children and parents to enjoy uninterrupted rest throughout the night. Benefits of Mamas Touch Weighted Sleeping Suits: Reduces Sleep Dependencies: Our sleep suit reduces sleep dependencies, helping your child feel secure without the need for constant parental intervention. Promotes Relaxation: Gentle weight distribution mimics the sensation of being held, soothing children to sleep. Improves Sleep Quality: Encourages deeper, more restful sleep for better overall health and development. Therapeutic Benefits: Provides deep pressure therapy, promoting relaxation and tranquillity. Support for Diverse Needs: Beneficial for those with sensory processing disorders, ADHD and autism. Good sleep is crucial for a child’s growth and development. The University of British Columbia emphasizes that poor sleep can negatively impact growth hormone production, cognitive function, emotional regulation, and overall physical health. Mamas Touch weighted sleeping suits are designed to help mitigate these issues by ensuring children get the quality sleep they need. Adequate and quality sleep is essential for the overall health and development of children. Here are some key health benefits of good sleep: Enhanced Growth and Development: Sleep supports physical growth and brain development, crucial during early childhood. Improved Cognitive Function: Quality sleep aids in better concentration, memory, and learning capabilities. Stronger Immune System: Good sleep boosts the immune system, helping children fight off illnesses and infections more effectively. Better Emotional Regulation: Adequate sleep contributes to more balanced emotions, reducing the likelihood of mood swings and tantrums. Overall Well-being: Regular, restful sleep improves energy levels, mood, and overall well-being, helping children thrive. At Mamas Touch, the belief is in the importance of good sleep for both children and parents. The mission is to provide effective and comforting solutions that make a real difference and transform bedtime into a peaceful and restful experience for the whole family.

June 26, 2024

Transitioning from School Holidays to School Term: A Guide For Work-From-Home Moms

Balancing remote work with kids during school breaks poses its challenges, yet transitioning from the relaxed pace of holidays to the structured routine of the school term can be equally demanding. Here are some practical tips to smoothly navigate this shift and swiftly regain your work rhythm: Get Kids Back into School Routine Early Establishing a routine for meals, bedtime, and chores a few days before the start of the school term can help ease the transition for both you and your children. Encourage earlier bedtimes to ensure your kids are well-rested and ready for the early mornings that come with the school routine. Set expectations for household chores to ensure everyone is pitching in and contributing to the smooth running of the household. Check Uniforms, Stationery, And Books Check your children’s school uniforms, ensuring they have everything they need for the term ahead. If there is a change of uniform due to season changes make sure that you check their uniforms still fit and ensure you have time to buy bigger sizes before they start the new term. Check that school bags are packed with the necessary stationery and textbooks. Replace any items that are missing or worn out. Make sure your children’s designated study areas are clear of clutter and ready for them to do their homework and study effectively. Plan Your Term Calendar Mark important dates in your planner, such as parent-teacher meetings, school events, exam and assessment timetables, and your children’s extracurricular activities. Take note of any changes in your children’s sports or activities schedule, especially if they transition from summer to winter sports in the new term. Reset By Taking A Day Off When Kids Go Back To School Consider taking a day off from work on the first day back to school to help ease the transition for both you and your children. Use this day to catch up on household tasks, organise your workspace, and reset your own routine after the school holidays. Spend quality time with your children in the evening, discussing their first day back at school and addressing any concerns they may have. Prioritise Self-care Navigating the school holidays while working from home can feel like a marathon, with constant juggling between professional duties and parenting responsibilities. As the kids head back to school and you finally have some breathing space, it’s crucial to shift gears and prioritise self-care. Those weeks of non-stop activity may have drained your energy and left you feeling depleted. Now is the time to schedule in moments of rest, relaxation, and rejuvenation to replenish yourself mentally, emotionally, and physically. Whether it’s indulging in a hobby you love, indulging in your favourite skincare range, taking long walks in nature, or simply enjoying a quiet cup of tea, make self-care a non-negotiable part of your routine as you transition back to your regular work-from-home schedule. Your well-being matters, and by investing in self-care, you’ll not only recharge yourself but also enhance your ability to tackle whatever challenges lie ahead. Boost Your Immune System It’s a scenario many of us have experienced: transitioning from a hectic, non-stop schedule to suddenly having more downtime. Surprisingly, this shift can sometimes leave us feeling under the weather. When we’re constantly on the go, our bodies adapt to the demands placed upon them. However, when that pace slows down, our immune systems may momentarily weaken, leaving us vulnerable to illness. This is not unusual and can be attributed to various factors, including changes in stress levels, disruptions to sleep patterns, and alterations in diet and exercise routines. In times of heightened stress, our bodies produce more cortisol, a hormone that can suppress the immune system. When stress levels decrease, our immune response may rebound, potentially leading to symptoms of illness. Additionally, sudden changes in routine can disrupt our body’s natural rhythms, making us more susceptible to infections. So, while it’s important to embrace moments of rest and relaxation, it’s equally crucial to support our immune systems during these transitions to maintain optimal health. Start Off Slow One common mistake many work-from-home moms make is overloading themselves with work as soon as their kids go back to school. It’s essential to start off slow and ease back into your work routine gradually. Begin with a manageable workload and gradually increase it as you and your family adjust to the school term. Avoid burnout by setting realistic expectations for yourself. Remember A Change In Routine Can Be Disconcerting Even though you may think you have the whole morning to get things done when the kids are at school, a change in routine can be very disruptive and hard to adjust to. Be easy on yourself as you transition from the more flexible schedule of the holidays to the structured routine of the school term. Understand that it may take time for both you and your children to adapt to the new schedule and be patient with yourself as you find your rhythm again. Transitioning from school holidays to the school term can be a challenging time for work-from-home moms, but with careful planning and preparation, it can be a smooth and manageable process. By starting off slow, getting your kids back into a school routine early, checking uniforms and supplies, planning your term calendar, and taking a day off to reset, you can set yourself and your family up for a successful start to the new term.

June 18, 2024

WHY RESPONSIVE PARENTING IS THE NEW BUZZWORD IN MODERN CHILD REARING

A fresh parenting style has been capturing caregivers’ attention worldwide: Responsive Parenting. Ursula Assis, Country Director of Dibber International Preschools, sheds light on this emerging trend, explaining its significance and its profound impact on child development. Understanding the Core of Responsive Parenting Assis describes responsive parenting as a holistic approach that focuses on the child’s needs, emotions, and developmental milestones. This style is distinguished by its sensitivity, empathy, and commitment to fostering a secure, nurturing environment. “Responsive parents are keen observers of their child’s behaviour. They engage in active listening, validate their child’s feelings, and provide guidance that is attuned to the child’s emotional state,” Assis explains. This approach is about being present and connected with the child, ensuring that the parent’s actions and responses are consistently supportive and encouraging. It’s about establishing trust and mutual respect, where the child feels valued and understood. The Four Pillars of Traditional Parenting Styles To appreciate the uniqueness of responsive parenting, Assis contrasts it with the four traditional styles: Authoritarian, Authoritative, Permissive, and Uninvolved. Each style represents a different approach to discipline, communication, and nurturing. While Authoritative parenting shares some similarities with the responsive model, especially in terms of nurturing and communication, responsive parenting goes a step further by prioritising the child’s emotional and psychological needs. The Benefits of Adopting a Responsive Approach Research has shown that responsive parenting has a myriad of benefits. “Children raised in a responsive environment tend to excel in cognitive, social, emotional, and physical development,” Assis states. These children often develop secure attachments with their caregivers, which leads to better problem-solving skills, independence, and emotional regulation. Furthermore, responsive parenting fosters a peaceful home environment where children feel loved and supported, reducing the likelihood of behavioural issues. Practical Applications of Responsive Parenting Responsive parenting is actionable in daily interactions. It involves: Being sensitive to the child’s needs and responding warmly. Accepting and understanding the child’s emotions. Setting realistic expectations and helping the child achieve them. Engaging in meaningful conversations and reasoning with the child. Demonstrating consistent behaviour for the child to model. Embracing Imperfection in Parenting Assis emphasises that responsive parenting is not about perfection. “Even the most responsive parents have their off days. It’s about the effort and intention behind our actions,” she remarks. Mistakes and missteps are part of the parenting journey. Apologising and reconnecting with the child after a mistake teaches them about humility, resilience, and emotional intelligence. Responsive parenting represents a paradigm shift in how we approach child-rearing. It underscores the importance of a nurturing, empathetic relationship between parent and child, laying the groundwork for an emotionally healthy, secure, and capable future generation. As Assis concludes, “In the end, it’s not about adhering to a perfect parenting model but about being the loving, present, and responsive caregiver that every child deserves.”

May 21, 2024

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