Anxiety at school: helping your child survive and thrive

Anxiety at school is not a new phenomenon; however, educators and parents alike recognise that there has been a significant increase in the prevalence of anxiety among children in the past year, as a result of Covid-19, pandemic lockdowns, and measures to ensure the safety of children who are back at school or in the process of returning. 

Anxiety is not to be dismissed or taken lightly, but the good news is that parents and teachers can take steps to ensure they firstly, recognise red flags in children and then respond appropriately, should there be concerns that a child is taking strain emotionally, an education expert says.

“Teachers and parents can recognise the onset of anxiety when a sudden change in behaviour becomes apparent and continues for at least three weeks or longer,” says Dr Jacques Mostert who holds a PhD in Psychology of Education and is Brand Academic Manager at ADvTECH, SA’s leading private education provider. Dr Mostert is globally renowned in his field, and has conducted experiential research in education in Denmark, the UK, South Africa and The Netherlands.

He says some of the signs to look out for include inattention and restlessness; attendance problems and clingy kids; disruptive behaviour that is not typical of the young person; trouble answering questions in class; an increase in problems generally, which could include a marked downturn in academic performance in certain subjects where usually there wasn’t a problem and if non-neurotypical difficulties are ruled out, such as ADHD or dyslexia. Finally, if a child starts avoiding socialising or group work, attention must be paid. 

“Anxiety is your body’s normal reaction to perceived danger or important events,” says Dr Mostert.

“It is like your body’s internal alarm system that is set to alert you of dangers that may be life threatening and it helps your body to prepare to deal with danger. However, your internal alarm is not very good at recognising whether the danger you may face is indeed life threatening or not. For example, your body reacts by becoming nervous about being late to school and seeing a big spider in the bathroom in the same way. Neither are likely to cause real damage, yet your body remains alert and ready to run away in either case.” 

Dr Mostert says anxiety or feeling nervous are normal emotions and can be expected during times of transition and change, especially during times of unprecedented disruption like the current Covid-19 pandemic.

“The news and social media are filled with reports of the danger of Covid-19, the virility of the virus and how to stay safe from infection. This is especially true for children and teens going back to school after their normal routines have been disrupted. Even young children who don’t watch news still pick up on the concerns of the adults around them, and constantly have safety measures reinforced in a way they were not before 2020.”

Many parents also remain concerned regarding children’s safety from the virus at school.

“While you as parent may be stressed about safety and Covid-19 safety procedures, this can be put in context by considering the excellent track records of schools where children have returned.”

If a parent has concerns about the anxiety of a child following the identification of symptoms which persist over weeks, they need to start tackling the problem at home, as the first line of response, says Dr Mostert.

“Routine is key in this. The first important step is to reinstate regular routines, including in the morning and evening. Nobody copes well when they are tired or hungry. Anxious children often don’t feel like eating breakfast, they might not feel hungry, or become nauseous after eating breakfast, so start making sure that your child gets back in the habit of getting some nutrition before heading to school.

“Also, make sure that your child wakes up early enough to avoid rushing to get to school. This of course means that you must ensure that your child goes to bed early enough, at a regular time. If your child spends hours before going to sleep on a device or social media, this is a habit that needs to end. It is not healthy for children or adults, for that matter.”

Dr Mostert notes that if a child becomes unusually quiet, or starts to ramble, this can also be an indication that they are anxious about returning to school. 

“Children often seek reassurance that bad things won’t happen in order to reduce their worry. Rather than dismissing this behavior or becoming frustrated with them, acknowledge their fears. Avoid making light of their (and your own) anxiety by, for instance, saying there’s nothing to be worried about or that they’ll be fine. Instead, listen to them, acknowledge their feelings, and encourage your child to work through ways of solving their concerns with your assistance.”

In addition, there are practical ways to deal with anxiety in the moment, which include:

  • Practising deep breathing
  • Taking a break and going outside
  • Talking about anxiety openly and objectively
  • Getting moving
  • Walking and talking
  • Practising positive thinking and keeping a gratitude journal
  • Trying to eat as healthy as is possible and drinking enough water

“When dealing with an anxious child, it is very important not to lecture or interrupt them, or to jump to conclusions or mock their fears.

“Instead, practise being a good listener, remain positive and retain a sense of humour, give positive feedback and reinforcement, aim to see fears from the child’s perspective. Helping your child through anxious periods is possible and an important part of their growth towards maturity. And, if your own efforts to help them do not yield results, there are many qualified and compassionate professionals who can help child and family get back on track.

“Adults should keep in mind that they play an important role in supporting children during this time to direct attention away from the concerns about friends, teachers, homework and Covid-19, by instead directing their thoughts toward the positives of seeing their friends, building relationships and new friendships, having the opportunity to interact with teachers and the safe environment of the school.”

Advtech Group

1 thought on “Anxiety at school: helping your child survive and thrive”

  1. hello there, thanks for sharing the good informative article with us.every parent should know about this.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Here’s How Tax Relief for Neurodivergent Kids Actually Works

If you’re raising a neurodivergent child in South Africa, you’re already doing a lot.

Appointments. School meetings. Forms. “Can you just send that report again?” moments. The daily juggling act of home + school + therapy + life.

So when someone says, “You might be able to claim tax relief,” it can feel like one more admin mountain… right when you’re already running on fumes.

Here’s the good news: tax relief is available, and there’s a real framework designed to give families some breathing room.

The bad news is: it’s not always obvious how it works, and the internet is full of conflicting advice.

This guide will help you understand the basics without spiralling.


Tax relief is available in South Africa

South Africa’s tax system includes support for families who carry additional medical and care costs. The main mechanism is the Additional Medical Expenses Tax Credit (AMTC).

It’s not a cash payout. It’s a tax credit that reduces the amount of normal tax you pay.

For many families, it becomes a crucial “safety valve”, especially when you’re paying for the kind of support your child needs to function well in the real world.


Where neurodiversity fits into the SARS framework

SARS doesn’t have a neat category called “neurodivergence.”

Instead, conditions like Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), ADHD, and PDA are considered based on their functional impact, in other words, how much they limit day-to-day life.

For tax purposes, a “disability” is defined as a moderate to severe limitation in a person’s ability to function or perform daily activities (including learning, thinking, communicating).

If your child’s challenges create a moderate to severe limitation that is expected to last more than a year, your family may qualify for tax relief.

If the limitations are considered milder, the condition may fall under what SARS calls a “physical impairment.” (Despite the name, this category isn’t limited to physical conditions and can still apply in some neurodevelopmental contexts.) 

Relief may still be available, but often with different thresholds and limits.


The common misunderstanding that trips parents up

One of the biggest myths is:

“If I have the diagnosis, we automatically qualify.”

Not necessarily.

SARS looks at whether the condition remains a significant limitation even after what it calls “maximum correction” (including appropriate therapy, treatment, or medication).

Because every child is different, eligibility is assessed case by case. Two families can have the same diagnosis and still have different outcomes depending on how the condition impacts daily functioning.

Which is frustrating, yes.
But also: it’s why getting clarity early matters.


Why paperwork and medical confirmation matter (even if you hate admin)

The admin requirements can feel like adding weight to an already heavy load.

But they’re also the keys to unlocking tax relief.

A diagnosis label isn’t enough. You need formal medical confirmation from a registered practitioner who is trained to give an opinion on your child’s condition.

The key document is the ITR-DD form (Confirmation of Diagnosis of Disability).

Whether this form is required in your situation can depend on how your child’s needs are classified (which is exactly where many parents get stuck).

Important: you typically don’t submit the form with your annual return, but you must keep it, along with invoices and proof of payments, for at least five years. 

SARS often verifies these claims, so having your paperwork organised from the start protects you later.

Think of it like this: a few clicks to save documents today can save you hours of stress later.


You don’t have to figure it all out today

If this feels complex, you’re not meant to decode it alone in between lunchboxes and meltdowns.

So we created a simple starting point for parents:

Download the tax relief cheat sheet at www.dalza.com/tax-relief-cheat-sheet/
 A clear summary of what you need to know (and what to gather), without the jargon.

Supporting a neurodivergent child requires enough time, energy, and emotional bandwidth as it is. Tax admin shouldn’t be another thing you have to white-knuckle your way through.

Start with the cheat sheet.
Get the lay of the land.
And take it one step at a time.

👉 Download the free tax relief cheat sheet at www.dalza.com/tax-relief-cheat-sheet/


Disclaimer:

This content is provided for general information purposes only. It is not intended as legal, tax, or financial advice. Tax outcomes depend on individual circumstances, and eligibility for tax relief is assessed by SARS on a case-by-case basis. We recommend consulting a registered tax practitioner or qualified professional before submitting any tax claims

Advtech Group
Get a second chance at success

If you’ve recently completed Grade 12, you’ll know that your matric results can lead to many exciting opportunities. Your matric certificate can help you get into the university or course of your choice, it looks great on your CV and it can help you ace that job interview by showing that you have the necessary skills to do the job.

But, what if your results were not what you hoped they would be and all these opportunities seem out of reach? You don’t have to be stuck with your less-than-great grades for the rest of your life. You can get a second chance at success.

Impaq, an innovative education solution provider, can help. You can register to redo some of your Grade 12 subjects in order to improve your results. Plus, you don’t have to be an Impaq learner to qualify. If you went to a public or private high school or received your matric certificate through a distance learning provider, you can still apply to redo your matric subjects with Impaq. The only requirement is that you must have had a sitting for the final examination in order to qualify.

Once you’ve applied and been accepted, Impaq will register you with the South African Comprehensive Assessment Institute (SACAI) to ensure that you receive your new (and improved) National Senior Certificate after passing the NSC Examination for the rewritten subjects.

To see if you qualify, send an email to [email protected]. The final cut-off date for registrations is 15 February 2018.

Advtech Group
Bullying: What parents and schools can do

ARTICLE BY PROF RITA NIEMANN, NALIZE MARAIS, ZENDRÉ SWANEPOEL AND MONIERA MOOSA

Bullying is a great concern for both parents and schools. Here we outline a number of measures that can help them both parties deal with bullying.

Parents

When parents notice that their child is behaving differently – not wanting to go to school, using illness as an excuse, suddenly performing poorly at school or enuresis – and suspect bullying, they need to act immediately.

Firstly, they must determine where this is happing (at school, at a sports club, on social media, etc.) and who the perpetrator(s) are.

Secondly, if the bullying is taking place in an organised environment such as at school or sports club, the authorities need to be informed and requested to step in. They are legally bound to protect the rights of the child.

Thirdly, parents have the responsibility to equip their children to cope by:

  • Instilling the knowledge that children must take a stand and that they have a choice in allowing someone else to victimise them.
  • Assisting children to terminate relationships that are potentially harmful, such as blocking a person on social media.
  • Helping them to identify bullies and the different forms of bullying.
  • Creating a safe space for children to speak about what is happening to them.
  • Emphasising assertive verbal communication if threatened.
  • Building children’s self-concept.
  • Getting the help of a psychologist, if necessary, to counsel the victim.
  • Emphasising that respectful behaviour is always the best option and thus preventing retaliation.
  • Fostering problem-solving and conflict resolution skills with the focus on restoring damaged relationships.
  • Working collaboratively to solve the problem with their children so that they can feel reassured.

Schools

As bullying is a deliberate act to hurt someone, there must be consequences for the bully. Once teachers are aware that a bullying incident has taken place at school, the matter must be dealt with by:

  • Asking the victim to provide the names of the perpetrator(s), as well as the names of friends of the victim, as soon as he/she has calmed down.
  • Counselling the victim and finding out whether he/she has been injured and what effect the bullying or harassment has had on him or her.
  • Cultivating a “no blame” approach towards bullying or harassment.
  • Establishing punitive sanctions for both the bully and for any bystanders.
  • Developing a bullying code of conduct/bullying policy and informing learners of this.
  • Having designated teachers to deal with incidents of bullying.
  • Facilitating mediation and discussions with the victim and the bully, depending on the severity of the bullying.
  • Passing the responsibility to the bully or group of bullies to make sure that the problem is solved.
  • Ensuring that potential bystanders understand that they have a vital role to play during bullying incidents.
  • Letting the victims feel protected after they have reported the incident.
  • Encouraging learners to make suggestions on how they can contribute to alleviating the negative experiences of the victim.
  • Scheduling follow-up meetings to monitor the situation where each party has to share how things are going.
  • Informing the parents of both the bully and the victim about the incident/s.

The principal and teachers have a crucial role to play in directing learners towards becoming responsible citizens. They should create a safe and secure environment, establish a non-violent culture, and be good role models for all learners.

Reference

Niemann, R., Marais, N., Swanepoel, Z. & Moosa, M. 2016. Problem areas in schools In: Jacobs, M. Teaching-learning Dynamics, Johannesburg: Pearsons

Advtech Group
Scroll to Top