Advice Column, Health, Lifestyle, Parenting

Authenticity – the expression of self

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  • Category Advice Column, Health, Lifestyle, Parenting

The expression of self is something that we struggle with from birth. The inability to express what your true needs or feelings are creates a frustration within you, which if not managed, can in fact cause serious physical and psychological harm. So how do we manage this? More importantly, how do we help our kids deal with this conundrum.

Conceptually, authenticity awakes feelings of peace and joy within you until you realise that maybe you aren’t quite sure what it is you need to do. As adults we have  a legacy of hiding who we are, which means that teaching our kids differently can be tricky.

To be authentic is in essence quite simple. It’s about acting in line with your values structure; it’s about voicing your opinion not someone else’s. It’s about making life decisions that are in your best interest and not something that you think someone else wants you to do. The best we can do hear, is model this for our kids to see. After all, they learn more from what they observe than what we tell them.

Authenticity is about making the choice to be the best you that you can be. This means that we as adults need to re-assess our behaviour and make a conscious decision to model what we want our kids to learn.

Of course, in the real world this isn’t always easy as we are so easily swayed by the opinions and perceptions of others. Our society dictates an in-the-box focus on life and in many instances discourages individuality.

What the world needs is more people who are prepared to stand up for what is right. We need to teach our children to be individuals who are able to think for themselves. We need to do this by first freeing ourselves from thought patterns that add no value to our own lives.

Feel that it is time to drop the shackles of mediocrity? Start by understanding your own value structure. If you are consciously aware of your values, you will make decisions based on your values, allowing no room for external negative input. Actively teach your children that it is okay to make decisions based on their value structure. Of course, we also need to temper that with teaching them to make safe decisions too.

Learning to express your true self is the greatest gift your will ever give yourself. It’s a journey of discovery taking you to places you may never have seen or forgotten existed. You will get in touch with your dreams, set goals for a brighter future. For me nothing says I’ve “got it right” than when my daughter stands up for herself and what she believes is right for her.

This does sometimes mean I get to bite my tongue every so now and again. It’s worth it.

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